Kuroshitsuji © Yana Toboso

OCs © reaper-of-lost-souls

A/N: Hey guys. Honestly I began to write this story because it gave me an excuse to write Undertaker with a wife and kids. I really~ wanted to write something along those lines for a long time, but I never got around to finishing the story. This story may have a few parts, I don't know I just finished the first part, but I do hope you guys enjoy this particular story. If you have any questions you can always ask me… though I may not answer right away. I have a hard time doing that if I don't receive comments every other day ^^'. This story kind of evolved from just being a gushy story and an excuse to write the reader with Undertaker to an actual story with a plot and substance. Some scenes can be long winded and even I know that, but heck I tried my best. I tried to explain some things that are going on and sometimes the scenes leap rather dramatically from a few hours to even a few weeks to a few years. I'm almost done with the second part to this story and this first part is obviously finished. Hopefully I'll find the stamina to read every single chapter so you readers can enjoy this little story I've begun to create. (I decided to start posting this story after I came back from my two week trip in case I lost interest)

If it's not very clear, this is set before the main canon of Kuroshitsuji starts and [insert-name] equals you, your name. That's about the only thing that is 'you' in this story, but heck that's just how I write things now a days. This is #89 in my 100 challenge, forgiveness. It's really 'forgiveness' after the first few chapters, but whatever. It certainly as a good prompt to start out from. If something isn't clear I'll try to make it known in a note and you can always ask me if you run into problems. Actually I am currently looking for names for the kids. So far I already have three… four names picked out, but I think I'll have give them more than just four kids ;D Let's see… yes your character, the main character, is old, centuries old, and her appearance doesn't show her age. If there's something you'd like to see or something I should enhance upon just ask. Yes, she's a shinigami. Ah… and yeah. That's it for now. I'll try to make these notes brief unless I have something I need to say. Good luck with the story and I hope you guys like it! Comment or give a review and I'll certainly appreciate your words of encouragement! X3 ENJOY!

! #$%^&*()

"Finally!" you huffed under your breath, appearing in a pouf of black smoke and jumping down onto the ground. A tired groan left your lips as you flipped back your hair, pulling on your black fingerless leather gloves to glance around at the environment around you. Long rows of large white buildings… yep. Didn't change that much, you supposed. You walked inside the building you appeared in front of, not bothering to wipe your dried muddied boots before walking in. You walked right up to the receptionist and slamming your hands onto counter, causing her to snap out of her reading and you gave her a friendly, yet crude grin. "Hello~"

"Hello ma'am. Do you have a question?" she asked politely with an obvious monotone in her voice, a snort leaving your lips as you lazily leaned against the counter, a dull look in your eyes.

"I suppose I do. See I'm thinking of transferring and I first need to know where my husband is located."

"Certainly," she nodded. "What is his name?"

"Well let's see~… because you know that idiotic man keeps changing his nicknames."

"If you tell us his real name I will locate him in our database," she explained in a dull voice, your eyes rolling, already tired of her boring expression and tone.

"Fine sweetheart," you huffed, poking your chin while you thought, trying to make a bit of a game out of this for your own amusement since this was already getting troublesome. "Last time I heard widely of him he went by the title of Death, the arrogant son of the dead," you snorted, the receptionist finally showing some sort of emotion, raising an eyebrow at your tone of voice. "Anyhow, his nickname should be thus, Death, and I doubt his actual name is in that electronic database of yours. Trust me I tried."

"Let's see… I'm sorry miss, but there seems to be no name of 'Death' –"

"Try harder," you grumbled. "He's a legend, if that helps, though I don't see why he is. Rather incompetent if you ask me. Ah… he also has white hair and piercings… likes the color pink?"

"Pink?" she looked at you curiously and you shrugged your shoulders. "Well… there is someone that fits that description –"

"Who? –"

"There's no real name, only an alias. He goes by the name 'undertaker' and is retired –"

"That shit face retired!? What the hell?!" you threw up your hands, groaning as you slumped over the counter. "Well… alright. That's probably him."

"How do you know? –"

"Because the only reaper that would call himself 'undertaker' is a loon and that's sadly who I married," you explained with a snort, "so could you please transfer me from my previous sector."

"Of course ma'am. May I have a card? –"

"Here," you grumbled, handing her over your personalized association card, having to get it changed every single time you transferred, which was a lot of times, in fact.

Yet when she looked at the name you could tell she was shocked, her mouth gaping open slightly and you couldn't help but feel amused by this… but you didn't tell her that, of course. Instead you let a devious smirk creep on your face as she quickly typed on a keypad, transferring your information from one computer to another, the screen showing her exactly what she needed to know. "H-here you go Death's Shadow –"

"Just Shadow is fine," you told her, grabbing the card from her and slipping it back into your pocket, "and thanks toots. I'll expect all of the paperwork to be done in an hour or else," you finished in a dark tone, making her gulp, but then you laughed and only made her ten times more scared of you, your laughter turning into giggles while you began to wander around. You began to remember fondly all the little places in the realm you were in, trying to recall where someone you knew worked or maybe a hint of where that male you married went.

! #$%^&*()

It's not every day that one sees a female reaper, but it's even rarer to see a female reaper dressed up in a casual outfit a high ranking officer would wear without any sort of spectacles on her face. While the percentage of female reapers is low most only end up in menial tasks, never taking on the real field work that, in your mind, is the true backbone of being a grim reaper, a bringer of death, a death god, a shinigami. Geeze… you've spent a long time being called a shinigami instead of a reaper, but you wanted some change and you've finally stopped blowing steam, you think. You'll just see how things go when you meet that man of yours, the jerk. You both agree on one thing and he does another. Okay he's not the worst, but he crossed a line he shouldn't have so you figured it was time to part ways for a while, take some time off of each other to find your center again. Plus, and you wouldn't admit this out loud, but you were getting tired of actually being an officer. Unless there was a fun little war the humans were involved in, a conflict with the other supernatural that needed your assistance, or rather your natural chaotic nature that only made things worse, you got rather bored with this game of dying souls and reaping humans. That's the job of a reaper, sure, but you've spent centuries upon centuries of doing the same thing and honestly your position was forced just because, at the time, the world was in need of more grim reapers running around, due to an increase in the human population.

Anyways, even for a high ranking officer you didn't dress up like one, at least not one most would assume is a reaper; maybe a reaper that had put on a disguise to roam around the human realm or even the demonic planes, but meh. That's not the case. As you stated before, you had your fingerless black leather gloves, your outfit dark blue and black in attire. In the sectors you were previously working in, aka the Orient or Asia as a whole or whatever, your cover was a ninja, an assassin, just because they wore dark clothing and believed in stealth and sneaking about. Now ninjas were kind of out of date for the times, but there were still some there. Shinigamis there did their own sorts of things compared to this sector and while there was a standard uniform, you were in a different, you might as well say it, caste then most. You were a highly trained reaper for the art of war, knowing battle strategies and how to easily kill devils and angels, how to organize troops as well as how to sneak about and gather information. Now a days, with the humans, such people would be called spies, in a few cases, but mainly assassins or even the police force. Doesn't matter to you what others think of you, but that's just what you are good at.

Now you did try to wear attire that would fit with this culture since you did have to move around in the human plane before coming to this realm, but you still wore your black attire: a black hood and cloak on your head and fanning out behind you, and you wore some things from the sector you were previously at and other articles of clothing you had kept when you worked here for a time. If your attire wasn't menacing enough, or at least brought eyes to look over at you, your dark shinigami eyes and canine-like teeth was another frightening thing about your figure, yet your eyes were only dark because you were tired and wanted to find that man already so you could sleep. You are actually a rather well built woman: your frame appealing since you did look like you were in your twenties, your unusual black and purple hair hidden under the hood, though some hairs did stray away onto your shoulders. Your skin was fair instead of the usually sickly pale most reapers had and if you were in a good mood you would be as attractive as a demoness, occasionally attracting other demons, in fact, but right now you weren't so you kept an annoyed expression, a rough demeanor, and a deadly look to cause most reapers to look away in fright while the small few looked at you, wondering who or what you are. You had to admit, when you are angry your eyes have been known to glow an eerie red, but you still had the natural shinigami eyes, actually more golden then just regular chartreuse green eyes most had. Yes, you were actually quite wise and old beyond your years, older than most reapers on the council, but you didn't care about that. You were just trying to track a man down that loved to hide, the ass wipe.

You felt like a bloodhound: sniffing around, following auras, realizing your mate barely showed up to the reaper plane unless it was to go to the library or a random little spot. It was typical of him, but that must mean he is living with the humans. You weren't surprised there, but… still annoyed you couldn't find him, yet. You sighed as you sat down on a bench, rubbing your sore eyes and groaning, tired and hungry and thirsty, and figuring you'll just go eat somewhere since it was already the afternoon and you haven't eaten anything for about two days now, maybe three. Okay, you didn't need to eat every day, but this was certainly affecting your performance. "… Mrs. Crevan is that you?"

"Larry? Pah! Your hair is turning gray!" you laughed, the man paling while you found his attire amusing, snickering to yourself while he raised an eyebrow, waiting patiently for you to finish giggling at him. "Oh wow~. What are you some big shot now?"

"Well I am~ the director of the glasses department," he grinned triumphantly, but frowned when you continued to snicker at him. "Stop laughing! God!"

"Sorry~~" you giggled, the man sighing and shaking his head, noticing your amusement had subsided as you stood up and put a hand in your pocket. "So why is your hair graying?"

"… I messed up on a mission and contracted the thorns of death," he told you simply, your eyes staring at him sympathetically until he snorted, turning his head away and his brown, graying hair flipping slightly as he did, "so I took a menial job, though honestly I was planning on transferring departments before the incident occurred anyhow."

"I hope it was because of a difficult~ mission, not some easy peazy job a monkey could do," you huffed and the man smirked at your natural sarcastic nature.

"No I assure you and it's certainly lovely to see you here again."

"Yeah," you snorted, "I'm sure~ you are –"

"N-no I'm serious," he chuckled, noticing the unimpressed look on your face. "Death hasn't been the same since you left. Took him a while to get out of the runt he was in. By the way, if you don't mind me asking, why did you leave without an explanation?"

"I gave an explanation," you shrugged, "but if that man didn't tell you then you don't have to know. Now since you're here," you continued in a soft tone, "where did that mate of mine go? I hear he changed his name to Undertaker now. Tell me that's not true."

"It is," he smiled, watching you groan and slump back onto the bench, laughing lightly at your childish mannerisms before sitting down beside you. He looked off into the distance to notice a few young reapers looking at the two of you, his eyes narrowing and they quickly scurried away. "At least it's not a generic nickname. The word 'undertaker' does take a twist on things, doesn't it?"

"Meh… well can you tell me where he is?"

"Sure milady," he nodded, grabbing a random strip of paper from his jacket along with a pen, writing something down before handing it to you, "and whatever problems you two had I hope you can work something out."

"Same here," you grumbled under your breath, noticing that indeed the man was living in the human realm in such a crowded place, London. "… Do you think it was wrong for me to run away from the situation instead of staying around and talking about it?"

"From what I remember you were fed up with just talking," the reaper shrugged, "so perhaps it was a wise choice, on your part."

"… W-well thank you," you chuckled, standing to your feet and crumbling up the paper before slipping it into a pocket. "Maybe I'll help you out with that thorn problem of yours for this info."

"You don't have to do that –"

"I know some tricks," you smirked. "I didn't spend centuries on the road doing nothing, you know. That pitiful disease of the thorns is something I know how to cure, actually," you snickered, noticing the surprised and hopeful look on his face, "but," you continued sternly, "if this information is false you can forget about my services."

"Trust me it isn't," he told you simply, "and if you need your glasses fixed you can come by the department and I'll fix them right up."

"Thanks, but you know how great~ my vision is," you chuckled and walked away, the man shaking his head and sighing, a light smile on his lips while he watched you disappear in a veil of black mist.

! #$%^&*()

You tilted your head to the side as you noticed the crooked sign up above the door, the cobwebs all over the place, a random coffin placed outside the establishment, and the dirty windows that even you couldn't see through. There was a distinct barrier around the small building, your eyes looking at the paper in your hands one last time, sighing in defeat while you wished this was the wrong place. "He never was an organizer," you mumbled to yourself in annoyance, "but he could try to clean up every once in a while," you huffed, letting in a deep breath as you opened the front door, walking inside without uttering a word and looking around the main room. Coffins… piles and piles of coffins. The stench of death was intolerable in this building, though since you are a grim reaper such smells don't bother you and are great for concealing one's aura. No wonder you didn't notice him while you had stopped by in London to take a quick breather before heading to the reaper realm.

What annoyed you was the dust. Not really the cobwebs or the dark undertone, which for you was something you associated with that man, but really it's the dust. You had a problem with dust, pollen, and other sorts of strong smells. You didn't get an allergic reaction or anything, but your nose would get stuffy and itchy, your eyes watery from time to time, and in drastic measures you would start coughing and hacking up a storm, flem flying out of your mouth and your lungs hurting. Well… you decided to wait, figuring the sound of the bell above the door was attention enough, finding a perfect place to sit on a coffin not too far away from the front door and not too close to the back either. Your hands started to feel clammy… but you shook your head. You weren't the one at fault here, it was him. You kept your eyes relatively dark, your hood causing your appearance to look more ominous, but as you saw the figure and familiar aura walk out from behind a curtain into the parlor your breath hitched, your body tensing up, and your eyes, instead of looking angry, was only worried and sympathetic. "[insert-name] is that you?" you heard such a rough voice say, your mind unable to take it anymore and you coughed into your hand, quickly standing to your feet to loosen up your body.

"You've always been obsessed with the corpses, but I never suspected you would want to live among them," you chuckled half heartedly, but before you could finish you were grabbed out of nowhere, a surprise squeak leaving your lips while you stood like a statue, petrified and unable to move.

"Oh my love, you're actually here!" he gasped in shock as if this wasn't the first time he saw you before, which, from what you have heard, wouldn't surprise you. His oddly warm hands cuffed your cheeks and he tilted your head up so he could have a better look at you, a weak smile appearing on your face, noticing the surprise look in his eye, his stray hairs parting slightly so you could see one single eye. "I-I thought you said you would never… come back."

"I figured I should give you a second chance," you managed to say with a snort, noticing how hesitant he was now. You felt his hands push back your black hood, reaching for your body, trying to grab hold of you as if you were suddenly dead and came back to life. "A-adrian please –"

"I'm a fool, an idiot. I am so, so, so oh sorry for being so dreadful to you. Please don't leave me! Don't go! –"

"You're getting ahead of yourself!" you spoke a note higher than his own, laughing lightly at his unsure state, running your hand down to grab his own while your stray hand reached up to cuff his cheek, rubbing the scar that now laid on his face. "Now how about you make a spot of tea just the way I like it and tell me why in the world you're living with corpses!?"

"I don't live~ with them. They're my guests!" he giggled, your eyes rolling and you groaned, the man grinning happily and grabbing your gloved hand a little tighter then he had to, afraid you would suddenly let go and leave him again.

"This is worse than your idea of sleeping in one of those mausoleums."

"But didn't we have fun~?" he snickered and you gave him a light smirk.

"Yes, we did, but even for me my creepiness radar was on the fritz that night. To many wandering spirits, you know? But that's a different thought," you chuckled, pulling on his hand and trying to drag him towards the back. "Come now. We need to talk."

"Alright~ love, alright," he smiled weakly and followed after you, chuckling in amusement as your eyes inspected every nook and cranny you both passed, the nostalgic familiarity running through him as he grinned in thought. Too many nights he has imagined you would appear out of the blue and now here you are, for real, and not some ghost of his imagination. Yet now… what to do? Why were you really here? You were sneakier then he was most of the time. Just why, after all of these years, would you have a sudden need to return to him?

! #$%^&*()

"Aaaw~, a lovely brew like always," you giggled happily, rubbing your nose and sniffling to yourself, "but you should really clean up the dust around here. It's horribly dreadful for my sinuses."

"I'll keep that in mind~" he snickered back, sipping on his tea while he watched you from the corner of his eye, sitting across from you at the small square table, a bit frustrated that you purposely sat across from him, indicating you were still mad or unsure or maybe a combination of both. "Now [insert-name]," he continued solemnly in the most serious voice he could muster, his mind spinning with obvious scenarios on your reasons for appearing and problems that could arise during this encounter, "how about you tell me why you're here?"

"What? You don't want to guess~ mate?" you chuckled, drinking some more of the tea, your legs swinging happily under your wooden chair like a child licking a lollypop, but then you set the cup down, glad he gave you a nice mug-like cup instead of those annoying teacups that this culture liked to use with their tea.

"I assume this isn't a time for guessing games," he stated and you nodded, putting your elbows on the table while you sighed, straightening up your back before you looked at him, slumping, giving him a tired look while you tried to muster the courage to say something.

"… You hurt me Adrian," you began softly, watching the man wince, but you smiled lightly at his boyish reaction. "You made a promise to me and you broke it."

"I know~ –"

"No," you shook your head. "I don't think you do. You say you'll change, you'll do better, but you never do. Instead of promising me things I would rather have you… be truthful with me. Stop keeping secrets. That's all I had asked… You should know that I don't mind whatever sexual innuendos you like to have," you shrugged, sitting back and scratching your nails at the wooden table in front of you nervously. "I-I… Okay so I can be jealous at times, I know, but I can understand that sometimes we have weaknesses. Yet you told me that you would never have relations with the female variety again and I, in turn, wouldn't do so with males, which I should add was something you wanted," you snorted and gave him a look before continuing, "but then you go around my back and sleep with a librarian? That's not right."

"Love –"

"I was tired of talking," you continued as if he didn't even utter a sound, "and I'm still tired of talking… I needed some time to calm down and think about some things. I feel like Hera," you chuckled nervously, looking him straight in the eyes from across the table, "always fuming over the fact that my husband likes to fuck anything with a pulse –"

"But I don't –"

"I know," you smiled weakly, "but that's how I'm always feeling, okay? I know you're not as bad as that former god, but still you're pretty close," you chuckled and shook your head. "… I want you apology," you spoke a little rougher then you had to, "but I also want you to understand that… I feel like a fool for coming back here. I figure you have an explanation and I want to hear it, but I really want to know if you changed or not, and not for the worse… Alright?"

"Alright," he answered, giving you a smirk and you happily smirk back, though the both of you looked depressed, your eyes speaking what words could not.

"So… go," you shrugged, sitting back in your chair and crossing your arms over your chest.

"You're right," he began softly, "I shouldn't have promised things I couldn't keep, but the reason I wanted that promise is because… I was jealous. You should know I'm very protective," he smirked and you grinned at him, "and after a while I couldn't take it. You like to flirt with others, I understand, but I-I acted selfish for asking that from you. I shouldn't have… I am a fool."

"You are," you stated simply and he chuckled at your comment.

"Yet I was really trying," he continued, looking down and away, unable to look directly at you anymore, "and I want to be the mate you should have instead of the one you're stuck with. I know you chose me and I still don't understand why," he chuckled again and shook his head, "but I feel like I don't deserve you, that's all."

"… Well alright," you answered, scratching the back of your head and sighing. "So did you actually change?"

"I-I believe so –"

"Believe~?" you questioned him and he giggled at the unimpressed look on your face.

"Sorry. That was the wrong choice of words… We're so strange we complement each other," he began, "and yet we're so different at times I get so confused with, ah, us. I know I shouldn't keep you locked away like a caged bird, but I kind of want to, and now that you've been gone for so long… I don't know," he shrugged. "There are some things we should probably talk about, but I believe I changed."

"How?"

"I don't have sex like a bunny," he looked to you and smirked happily, "and while you said that promise was over I did honestly try to keep to my vows. That gal was only a one night stand anyways," he huffed, "and after that I took my relationships seriously. I don't sleep around anymore and when I did end up with a creature it was only that being, not multiple consorts. Sometimes we didn't even consummate," he told you, "and it was just because I grew to care for them… It's hard. Caring for another being then yourself is difficult," he grumbled under his breath and you gave him a light smile. "They turn their back on you and you feel hurt and when they die it's painful. Caring sucks."

"Yes it does," you chuckled, "and now you know how it feels."

"Indeed," he slowly nodded his head, looking up at you timidly, but you kept your face rather pleasant, calculating everything you had heard and then you sighed.

"Where's the apology?" you asked simply, the man quickly walking around the table and kneeling down on one knee, grabbing your hands and slowly prying off your gloves, placing them on the table as he did.

"I'm oh so sorry for breaking your trust. I will never hurt you like that again. I am a fool and an idiot and I can never deserve you. I know I'm strange, but… can you still take me back?"

"Yes," you smiled, giggling lightly when he grinned and the twinkle came back to his eyes, his head looking down to kiss your hands, your cheeks blushing slightly as he did, "b-but," you continued, noticing his happy energy was starting to dwindle, "we still need to talk about some things."

"Like what~?" he asked curiously with a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

"I never would have thought you would retire before me," you snorted, his eyes looking up at you with intrigue while he put your hands under his chin, a smirk appearing on your face and you shook your head. "I'm getting tired of chasing after monsters and evil spirits. If there's no war it's kind of boring doing the same thing over and over. I know I kept telling you I didn't want to do this, but… I kind… of want a family," you told him, biting the bottom of your lip as you watched his facial features move from confusion to shock when he realized what you said and then slowly turning to his usual, devious look.

"You want children? –"

"I know I said I didn't want any," you babbled before he could stop you, "and I feel like a fool for saying no so many times, but I-I came to that decision while I was wandering around for the upmost time a-and I want kids, okay?! They were always cute, but now Ijustwantsome andafterbeingamidwife I-Irealized howperfecttheycanbe and –"

"Woman calm down," he chuckled, cuffing your cheek while you close your eyes and shook your head.

"A-andIjustwanttomakeyouhappy anditmaybepainful, butit'dbeworthitand Ikindofwanttosettledown and I'm sorryforsayingIwould never thinkoftheideaandyou'dprobablywantsome a-and ah… I just want a family," you told him, giving him an frightful look, having a feeling in your gut he would start teasing you, telling you how many times you said no.

But… he didn't. Instead he searched your eyes, smiling lightly at your fear, before leaning forward to kiss your lips, those plump, pink lips he has been deprived from for centuries, his need for you starting to grow in his gut, but he pushed those feelings aside to comfort you the best he could instead of teasing you like he would have normally done. "You know I was always hopeful you would agree," he decided to say, kissing your cheek as he continued to talk, making your body tingle due to his hot breath on your face, "but I also did not want to push you into this."

"I-I know," you mumbled, slumping into his hand and letting him cuff you while he scooted closer, his light butterfly kisses moving down your jaw, down your neck, causing you to shudder when he kissed you until he stopped at your neck, breathing up your body and causing you to whimper at his teasing. If it was intentional or not you didn't know, but it certainly felt good. That's for sure.

"You… are already a free spirit," he chuckled, nuzzling his nose into your neck and making you squirm, giggle, and grab his shoulders in an attempt to move away. "I honestly only need you and we are always busy, but now~… if you want, I suppose, we can have a few little pups running around wreaking havoc. I was simply waiting for you to agree to the idea."

"… Adrian," you groaned, pushing on his shoulders rougher then you had to so he would move away, but you kept him close, your hands still on his shoulders while you looked down on his face, smiling lightly while you leaned down on the chair to the point that you were close to falling off. "You're right when you said we are almost complete opposites and at other times we are so similar it's hard to tell us apart, but… understand I did try very hard to figure out what I wanted in life. I want you, but I need to know if you'll commit to me before I fully commit to you, again."

"Then I'll show you that I am fully committed," he chuckled, kissing the top of your hand, standing up while your eyes followed him, watching him brush off the dust from the bottom of his black robes before giving you a grin. "My younger self would convert back to old ways, but I assure you~ after losing you like that I'm not willing to let it happen again. I took your letter to me to heart, [insert-name]. I changed –"

"But for better or worse?" you asked him with an unsure look on your face. "D-did you lose your cutesy little charms and your love for a good laugh? That's kind of why I married you."

"Oh my~, I hope not," he snickered, kissing the top of your head before walking away, sighing as he sat back down, a bit reluctant to let you go, though he knew he would have to so he could sit back down again. "Now I must ask –"

"Not tonight," you snorted, knowing what was on his mind. "Let's just enjoy each other's company for a while. I haven't rested in days."

"Of course love," he grinned, not at all bothered by your quick refusal. "We can trade stories~ and sleep in the graveyard~ –"

"No Adrian! No graveyard fetishes right now!" you growled and he could only laugh at your reaction, your eyes rolling while you groaned and grabbed your cup of tea. You decided to let a light sincere smirk appear on your lips, glad to see him laughing once again.