Okay, this is weird. At first, I didn't understand why people didn't ship this couple, but I'm guessing it has something to do with the age difference. So, let's pretend Russell's in his mid 20s.

Russell Dunbar was in a pinch.

He had a history of being a playboy. He cared about nothing but sex and his reputation.

When he met Max Black, however, it changed.

Not immediately. He was put out and confused by her crude and unapologetic manner. It didn't matter though. He just wanted one night.

But as they were making out on his bed, her phone rang.

"Ooops!" She drawled as she pushed him off of her and onto the floor. "It's my boyfriend. He's gonna be so ticked." She exclaimed. She ran out of the door, without even saying goodbye.

"Wait!" Russell called after her.

He sighed and looked on his bed, which had one lone scrap of paper on it.

Her phone number.

"Well, you didn't want her anyway." Adam said, when he, Russell, and Jeff were alone at their table in the eatery one day. He couldn't see what was so important. "A girl wanted to cheat on her boyfriend with you and left when he called. Big deal."

"Yeah, it is a big deal. You can't just walk out on me like that. It's like she chose her boyfriend over me."

"She did." Jeff pointed out.

"No, she didn't." Russell insisted. "She left me her phone number." He emphasised. "When I call her, she'll be begging." He announced as he made towards the door.

When he called her, she wasn't exactly begging. It was more of 'I have a boyfriend, you want me, so deal with.'

The only reason Russell dealt with it was because he did want it, not her. He'd deal with it as long as he wanted.

Apparently, he couldn't get enough of Max, because he dealt with it about 3 more months.

Those three months consisted of shopping (He bought the groceries) manicures (he came with and paid) and nothing more than a one thank you (read as make-out session).

Oh, and cupcakes. Don't get him started on the cupcakes.

Everytime she was around him he could always smell cupcakes. He remembered the night he met her in Club Deception that she mentioned something about selling cupcakes. She also said something about candy cane ,though he thought it sounded like Caroline. Like Russell can actually be bothered to listen to a woman for more than 3 seconds.

He talked to Max about it, (the lack of it) but before he got to the main issue, she had kissed him and led him to the bedroom.

But then her phone went off.

"Maxine, I need you to come back to the cupcake shop. I know you're in the middle of something very disgusting that you're gonna regret, so I'm saving you. Call me Captain- Save-a-"

"Okay!" Maxine jumped of the bed, silencing her phone. "Um, well. Captain calls." Maxine stuttered. "Maybe next time."

"Uh, sure." Russell said. That voice on the phone sounded a bit familiar.

Next time was 4 months later.

"Russell, she's using you." Jennifer said,another day at the diner. "Yeah, dude you're getting milked like a cow." Adam laughed, but Jennifer silenced him with a glare.

"You just wait." Russell assured them. "Soon, she'll be eating out of the palm of my hand."

Russell's hand fed alot and Max was taking whatever she could.

1 month later, Russell went inside the diner, where all four of his friends were present and said 2 words: "Help me!"

"She's sucking me dry." He declared. "Yeah, you'd think you were the one with the-" Adam was silenced by a punch in the stomach by Jennifer.

"You got to get rid of her, Russell." pitched in Audrey.

Actually, Russell didn't have to. Max didn't call or contact him for the next two weeks.

"Who cares?" Adam asked. "She used you. You should be happy." "Yeah." Russell responded.

Except he wasn't. He'd grown attached to Max. She was beautiful, sassy, street smart. She took crap for no one. She gave him a complete run for his money.

When he told Adam and the others this, they laughed. But when he told them he hadn't had sex with, talked to, or looked at another woman since being with her?

Well, Jeff nearly choked on a waffle.

"Well, sounds like you're in love." Audrey spoke.

That is when Russell decided to get up and leave without another word.

"Russell?" His friends called.

He appeared in the window of the door, shaking his head and waving.

That is why Russell ended up at Max's apartment that night. Not because he loved her, but because she was a weed, a poison. He had to get rid of it.

But when he went to her house, he looked in her window….And saw her kissing someone else.

He didn't know why, but he went inside.

"So, this is how it is?" He demanded. The two split apart on the couch and stood.

"Maybe I should go." said the male.

"No, Deke.."

"Yes, you should go." Russell opened the door. Deke left.

Once the door shut, the gloves went off.

"What are you thinking? You can't just come and force my company to leave."

"Yes, I can. I'm your boyfriend. You can't just-"

"Boyfriend? I have a boyfriend. That was my boyfriend. You knew about him 8 months ago!"

"Well…" Russell started.

"Oh, no. I've heard about you, Russell Dunbar. You're a womanizer. You've practically hit every girl in town. You even got my girl Caroline."

"Who?"

"Of course, you wouldn't know." Max opened the door.

Max, I love you." He tried.

"Good. Then you know how it feels. All those girls you played with felt the same way. Goodbye."

He walked toward the door and over the threshold.

"Max-"

She slammed the door in his face.

So, that's how it was. The first woman he ever truly loved, and she only dated him to avenge her friend. Huh.

Russell would've said karma was a S.O.B but the incident with Maxine got him thinking. If a woman would go that far just for revenge on him, he must be doing something wrong.

He decided to do better. He'd become a better man and treat women right.

And maybe he'd earn her love.

Finished. Please read and review. I don't own Rules of Engagement, 2 Broke Girls, or any of the characters. I believe that Caroline has used the "Captain Save-a-***" line before so I don't own that either.