It was the beginning of October and even now it was too warm to think. Or maybe it was just that the room was too stuffy. Emily put her book down on her bedside table and rolled around on her bed. She pushed herself up on her elbows and took a peek at the beat-up digital clock that was partly covered by the book that she had just put on top of it. 21:28. It was too early to sleep and even if it wasn't so early she wouldn't have been able to anyway. Her mind was racing, thoughts moving at lightning speed, leaving her with an almost buzzing sensation. She let out a huge sight and flipped off the bed before grabbing a sweater and heading for the door.
She strolled the street leisurely, pondering at first if she should grab her bike and go for a ride but then decided not to. Her front-light was broken and she hadn't had time during the week to get a new one. Maybe come the weekend...
"We are extending an olive branch here Miss Fields, but you have to give us a little back to show that you're invested in what we have to offer."
Emily hadn't really grown used to this place yet. It was not inside campus but it gave her a reason to get out her bike more often as it was more convenient than the public transport. And since she arrived here she had taken a liking to long bike rides, finding them helpful to clear her mind. Living inside campus hadn't really been an option anyway, not with her entering university as a sophomore, most of the dorms had already been reserved for freshmen, or at least people that had an uninterrupted academic career. But she had gotten admission, even if it was from the wait-list and lodging that could be deemed acceptable so she couldn't really complain. She had fallen behind and had a lot of making up to do if she ever wanted her life to really start. She felt that for such a long time her life was somehow on stand still: even when people were still moving around her. For a very long time after her dad had died everything just seemed to fade to a blur and she had continued as if on auto control.
It wasn't until she went back to Rosewood, faced her demons yet again and found out that her old friends still had her back that she allowed herself to turn it off and feel that she could finally control something again. With Spencer's help she had composed a very convincing letter of admission, and with Mrs. Hasting pulling some strings and calling a few acquaintances and after having spent many nights sitting at the window seat in her old room with her stomach in knots she was finally relieved to find an email in her mailbox enclosing that she had been taken off the wait list and would be attending Pepperdine University the following fall. At that moment she had finally allowed herself to feel something again. She had produced an unexpected yelp of surprise and her mother came running upstairs wondering if her daughter had gotten hurt. When Emily had disclosed the good news they grabbed each other and did some impulsive victory-jumping until one of the frames on the shelf fell down with a loud clunk. When Emily was bending down to see what had fallen down and noticed that it was one of the last photos that had been taken of her with her dad, she felt her mother's presence behind her.
"He would have been so proud of you, you know that."
"So very proud of his college dropout? I'm not really doing anything remarkable mom, just fixing some things that I already messed up." Emily had said as she picked the frame up.
"Sweetie, now look at me," Emily turned around and met her mother's gentle eyes. "It's not important that you fell. It happens to the best of us. What matters is that you are trying your hardest to get back up. And tonight you won a major victory in order to achieve that. So let's just rejoice in that fact okay."
Emily had smiled and positioned the frame back on the shelf. "He belongs there. Close. And yes, I will take him with me."
Emily got pulled from her thoughts when she realized that she had walked an entire circle and that her phone was buzzing inside her room. She hurried back in but didn't manage to catch it before it stopped ringing. It was once again buried in the large pile of clothes that was ever present next to her bed and she heard it peep again when she pulled it out of a pair of jeans. There was a message from Hanna:
Any plans this weekend? Want to meet up? Can't wait to see your place.
Emily typed back a response and threw her phone back on top of the pile. She laid back on her bed and let out another sight. It would be fun to see Hanna again but she wasn't exactly looking forward to showing her around the three and a half corners of her crammed 'apartment'.