The Quarrels of Friendship
A Peanuts Fanfiction by LivingOnLaughs
"We're going to be late for school, Sir…" Marcie-a six-year-old girl-explained.
A girl slumped by an oak tree sighed as she looked up a t her in annoyance. "I'm not going, Marcie…I can't take it anymore! I'm getting dumber and dumber every day and it's all just too embarrassing…" she sighed for a second. "I'm the only kid in the history of education to have a straight 'Z' average!"
"You have to go to school, Sir…you can't just quit!" Marcie replied bitterly.
"Why can't I? Yesterday one of the teachers even criticized my lunch! She said I had too many doughnuts and not enough carrots…it's time to quit when they even criticize your lunch!" retaliated Peppermint Patty.
Patty sighed as she walked into a backyard and climbed up the doghouse. "Now what are you doing, Sir?" the younger girl wondered.
"I'm not doing anything, Marcie…I'm just going to sit here for the rest of my life with my ol' friend Snoopy!" the freckled girl argued.
"Don't do that, Sir! Come down! Come down and go to school with me!"
"Nope! I'm going to sit right here because ol' Snoop is the only one who understands me!"
"I do?" Snoopy asked himself.
If shouting didn't help the situation, maybe bribery would; it was worth a shot. "Sir, please come down, and let's go to school..." Marcie softly said. "If we hurry, we can still make it to second period…"
"I hate second period! Besides, I've already told you I'm going to sit here with Snoopy for the rest of my life! We're just going to sit here and beep each other on the nose…BEEP!" Peppermint Patty argued, beeping Snoopy on the nose, realizing it was cold and wet.
"Thrillsville '74!" Snoopy thought.
"Sir, you're being very foolish!" the bespectacled girl snapped. "I'M LOSING MY PATIENCE WITH YOU, SIR! WE HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL! COME DOWN FROM THERE RIGHT NOW, AND LET'S GO TO SCHOOL!" she shouted.
"Marcie, has anyone ever told you that when you're mad, you look just like Billie Jean King?" Peppermint Patty wondered.
Many, MANY hours of arguing later, Charlie Brown walked home from school to find Marcie on the front step. As expected, he was shocked. "Marcie! What're you doing here?" he questioned.
Sighing, Marcie decided to tell him everything. "Do you realize I've missed school today?" she asked as his eyes widened. She had a PERFECT attendance record until today. "I've spent the whole day in your backyard trying to get Patty to come down off Snoopy's house!"
As the two walked to the backyard, they saw the dog and freckled girl atop the doghouse. "See?" Marcie shouted. "She's been sitting up there all day! She won't come down and go to school!"
"But what can I do?" Charlie Brown asked.
"Good answer, Chuck!" Peppermint Patty groaned.
"I could see it coming!" Snoopy thought.
The next day, things weren't any better and-like Marcie expected-Peppermint Patty was once again on Snoopy's doghouse. "Sir, let's not miss anymore school…" Marcie began.
"Forget it!" retaliated Peppermint Patty. "School isn't important, Marcie…I'm just gonna sit here with my ol' friend Snoopy for the rest of my life!" she explained, hugging Snoopy firmly. "He never had any education, and he's done all right!" the tomboy added as she released Snoopy from her grip.
"Actually, I've always regretted that I never went to medical school!" the beagle told himself.
"Sir, if you don't come down, I'm going to drag you down!" Marcie threatened, but Peppermint Patty wouldn't budge. Upset with her best friend, the younger girl climbed up the doghouse as it shook a little.
"HEY! LET GO!" Peppermint Patty shrieked as she felt something grasp onto her ankle. Snoopy quivered in fear. "LET GO, MARCIE! YOU'RE PULLING THE WHOLE HOUSE DOWN!" nothing Peppermint Patty said was working, so she spoke louder. "MARCIE! YOU'RE DESTROYING CHUCK'S GUEST COTTAGE! MARCIE, LET GO! MARCIE!"
"SOMEBODY STOP HER! SHE'S GONE INSANE!" Peppermint Patty was literally screaming at this point. "MARCIE! LET GO! LET GO! SOMEBODY STOP HER! SHE'S PULLING THE WHOLE HOUSE DOWN! MARCIE, LET GO!"
It didn't take much longer for Marcie to stop trying to drag Peppermint Patty off the doghouse as the 'doghouse' crumbled to the ground. "AUGH!" the two shouted as they fell to the ground.
"I think all my arms are broken!" Snoopy thought.
"Wow!" Marcie trembled.
"Alright, Marcie, I hope you're satisfied!" Peppermint Patty began. "You've destroyed Chuck's guest cottage!"
"It's not a guest cottage, Sir, it's a doghouse! And Snoopy is not a funny-looking kid with a big nose! He's a beagle! WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO FACE UP TO REALITY?!"
"A beagle?"
"Woof!" replied Snoopy.
"Come on, Sir…let's go home." The bespectacled girl sighed.
"A beagle?" Peppermint Patty wondered.
"I don't know how we'll explain missing school today, but I'll think of something…"
"A beagle?"
"We could say we had sore throats, but that would be lying…"
"A beagle!"
"Psychological problems! That's it! We'll tell them we had psychological problems…"
"A beagle?"
"Suppertime!" Charlie Brown cried out, expecting Snoopy to jump off his doghouse and dance. Looking at Marcie's undoing of the doghouse, the round headed kid gulped. "Good grief! What happened to your doghouse?"
"Never mind." Snoopy huffed. "I hate waiters who ask personal questions."
The next day, Charlie Brown was awoken to a knock at the door. "Marcie? Peppermint Patty?" he asked, recognizing the white circles greeting him.
"Go on, tell him…" Peppermint Patty insisted.
"Charles…I…I…I…" Marcie stammered.
"Is something wrong?"
"I…I…WAAH!"
"I'll take that as a yes…"
"Sorry about her, Chuck…Marcie just wants to apologize for ruining your doghouse." The tomboy sighed, cringing a little.
Charlie Brown blinked in shock. "She WHAT?"
"It's my fault, Chuck…" Peppermint Patty guiltily confessed.
"I didn't mean it…" Marcie sniffled.
"Don't worry, Snoopy's fixing his doghouse as we speak." Charlie Brown reassured.
"I know…I just…I wish I…I wish…"
"Marcie, are you gonna cry again?"
"N…no…"
"Wait for it, Chuck…" Peppermint Patty sighed.
"I'M SORRY, CHARLIE BROWN! WAAH!" Marcie screeched.
"Oh good grief…" Charlie Brown sighed. "Like I said, Snoopy's fixing his doghouse as we're sitting here."
"Hmm…my Van Gough, the pool table, the 1930's car catalogue and the collector's edition Batman comics are unharmed; the spare bed needs some fixing up though…" the beagle told himself as his siblings-Belle, Andy and Olaf-helped rebuild the house.
