(1/7/07: This revised chapter was brought to you by Ulrich, nya!)

Well, it's taken me a while to start this story… but… I started it.

Wow, that's my best opening line yet! xD Anyway, I can't think of anything humorous to write for the typewriter story, so I decided to start this story while my ideas for it are fresh in my head.

I'll update APITP sometime after I get this written. So, umm, enjoy!

This story takes place before Revelation and The Key in season 2.

Chapter 1

Something Fishy's Going On

Humans.

There's only one thing that stands between me and world conquest, and it is those irritable creatures.

The thing that makes it more aggravating is that they're so stupid.

Everything about them is stupid. From those disgusting hairs that grow from their heads right down to their filthy fingernails. I can never understand how something as incompetent as humans rule this foolish planet.

Now, if I were to be in charge, I'd take care of this world. Humans just destroy everything where they stand. I would repair the damage they had done before they 'left' and make it a better place for all.

A quiet, peaceful place with no humans barging around. That sounds wonderful.

However, what really interests me are those other creatures that live alongside them. Foolish monsters- don't they realise they're helping to accelerate the cause of their own demise?

None the less, I need to do a little pest control first.

Those children always mess with my plans. I've thrown everything at them from a full on blizzard to possessing everything near them and order them to attack.

Hmm. Maybe these animals… and these pests…

I tried it with those… rats, were they called? And the... hornets. But neither of them were enough. No animal could stop genuine fools like these. Maybe I'll need to... as the meatbags say themselves, 'take it up a notch'.

I wonder, would it be possible... if I gathered the correct DNA particles... then, with the humans...

Yes. It's perfect. That way I can watch them stumble around even more like the fools they are.

That is what I will do.

First, I will need to research on these 'creatures'…

Ulrich looked at his surroundings confusedly.

Where... where the heck am I? All I see is light, light and look- even more light. What gives?

A figure was drifting towards him. Ulrich squinted his eyes to see who it was.

It looked a little like Yumi.

What in the name of Lyoko is going on here?

There was something different about her, though. She looked like she was glowing, almost like a ghost.

Ulrich couldn't help but blush a little as Yumi drifted closer and closer to him.

"There's something I have to tell you, Ulrich."

Ulrich's heart skipped a beat.

"W-What is it?"

His heartbeat quickened as she leaned closer to him.

"I've wanted to tell you this for a very long time."

She closed her eyes and screamed:

"SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAY! Good morning France! It's another BEAU-TI-FUL day with plenty more surprises, just like any other day!"

"GAH!"

Ulrich yelped in surprise as he fell out of his bed and landed on the floor.

"Oww…" He rubbed his head painfully before getting up again.

"What in the name of HELL happened there...?"

"Happened where?"

A fully dressed Odd was standing at the door, with a concerned look on his face.

"You OK, buddy?" he asked as he walked over and turned off the clock radio.

"To be honest," Ulrich sighed as he fell onto his bed. "I really don't know."

He started to add up everything that just happened in his head – the weird dream, the nervous vibe, the VERY ANNOYING wakeup call and falling out of bed.

At that point, Ulrich felt very silly.

"Thank God Odd didn't see…" he grumbled, a little too loud.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Just saying how much I love this stupid radio."

Odd chuckled. "I know, I know. 'It's all a conspiracy' and whatnot. Hurry up and get dressed- breakfast doesn't eat itself, you know!"

Ulrich narrowed his eyes. If it did, you would be very upset.

He pushed all of the thoughts of his 'awkward' dream out of his head and started to change.

Aelita and Jeremie eventually came down to the cafeteria to see Odd devouring… devouring… something, they couldn't see since he was eating so fast.

"I think we all agree that Odd eats like a crab." Ulrich said, prodding his banana with a bored expression on his face.

Aelita had a confused look on her face.

"Krabes don't eat." She said with her voice full of question.

"Mmf meh varlf mmrff!" Odd replied, spraying crumbs everywhere.

The others didn't even begin to try and comprehend what he just said, so Aelita and Jeremie just sat down.

Odd was still eating, and to emphasise his point, Ulrich started to wave his arms around like a crab would while his friend wasn't looking. Aelita and Jeremie burst out laughing at this.

Odd looked around him, confused.

"What? What is it?"

"Yeah, what's so funny?"

The others turned to see Yumi standing next to their table, folding her arms.

"Oh, nothing. Just watching Odd eat." Aelita replied.

Yumi made a face. "You watch him eat?"

"It's pretty hard not to." smirked Ulrich. "With the radius the crumbs fly through, I think it counts as watching even if he's at the corner of your eye."

"I'm still here, you know." Odd pointed his spoon at Ulrich accusingly.

"Aww, don't worry Odd," Yumi said, patting him on the head. "You're still our friend."

Odd grinned. Then he burped, very loudly.

This, afterwards, introduced a lot of laughter.

"Honestly Odd, you really are a pig!" Ulrich chortled.

Amidst the laughter, Jeremie could still hear the beeping of his laptop.

"Hey guys! Looks like XANA's woken up again!"

Odd jumped up excitedly. "OH YEAH! Once again, it's time to go blast weird shaped scary thingys!"

Yumi and Ulrich rolled their eyes as they all made their way to the factory.

Jeremie called down to the others through the intercom.

"OK guys, I'll launch the transfer. You're going to the mountain area for today."

"Transfer Odd, Transfer Yumi, Transfer Aelita! Scanner Odd, Scanner Yumi, Scanner Aelita! Virtualization!"

"Ahh, it's good to be in Lyoko again!" Odd said happily, flexing his claws and glancing at the tall mountains around him.

"Hold on you guys, I'm sending Ulrich now!"

Not long after Jeremie finished, Ulrich dropped down in a crouching position beside Aelita.

"Which way to the tower?" asked Yumi.

"It's further east than where you are now."

"Righto."

They all started running in said direction. Yumi noticed that instead of Ulrich being in front, Odd took the lead this time. The brunette was lagging behind with a wary expression on his face. This worried her a little, so she slowed down until she up with him.

"Anything the matter?" she said.

Ulrich jumped a little, never noticing that she was there. He averted his gaze. "Oh, hi. It's... it's nothing."

Yumi glared at him with her lips pursed. "Geez, that's how Ulrich always is. Never wanting to talk to anyone about his problems, always keeping to himse-"

"I hope you know I hate it when you do that." She smirked at this.

"I've just... had this weird feeling ever since I was virtualized."

"What kind of a feeling?"

"It's hard to describe." Ulrich mumbled, rubbing his left arm a little. "Sorta like a gut feeling something bad is going to happen, or something like that..."

Odd and Aelita were way ahead of them. "C'mon, you slowpokes!" yelled Odd.

Yumi and Ulrich quickened their pace.

"It's a XANA attack. Don't we always get that sort of feeling?" the Japanese girl questioned.

"Something just isn't right this time."

Before she could reply, Ulrich stopped abruptly and stared ahead of them, nearly making Yumi crash into him.

"Hey, watch it!" Yumi protested.

"I coulda sworn I saw a tarantula for a second there." He said, rubbing his eyes.

Yumi blinked. "Huh?"

Soon enough, they came across the activated tower. Aelita walked inside and 'did her thing', so to speak.

"Tower deactivated."

"Great job guys! There shouldn't be any need for a- huh? Hey! W-What's going on?"

"What's the problem Jeremie?" asked Aelita.

"I-I dunno! There's some kind of program that's starting up here! It looks like a return to the pa-"

The others didn't hear any more as the return trip activated by itself.

It felt normal to Odd and Yumi. But Ulrich felt a lot different than before. His suspicions were confirmed- something was wrong.

Terribly wrong.

Project ALPHA-M30WM1x... Initiate

It was morning again. Ulrich slowly opened his eyes, then closed them again to block out the sunlight.

Too early to wake up… need sleep… nyaa!

He froze.

Did I... just say 'nyaa'?

Ulrich shook his head as he rubbed his eyes. Strange. It felt… really different.

Very furry, actually.

I must be more tired than I thought. Oh well, I'm awake now. Might as well get ready for school.

He then realised something else.

My bed feels bigger than it did before...

He reached up to pull the blanket that was over him away, but to his horror his hand was gone.

Instead he had a furry brown paw.

Ulrich touched his face for a brief second. He felt strange things on his face. Like… wire. Or were those... whiskers?

Why do I suddenly get the feeling that I'm a-

That's when the truth dawned upon him. He leaped into the air and landed on his pillow.

UNYAA!I'M A CAT!

Project... complete

Wow, who didn't see that coming? (random people raise hands) ... you're all morons. MORONS, I TELLS JOO.

Ahem, well, do you like it so far? I didn't really like this chapter much, but the story's just getting started! Don't forget to write a review for Auntie Katfish!

Next time on Freaky Felines! Ulrich's just discovered that he's indeed a cat. Will he get to Yumi's house safely, or will he flattened by the cars while crossing the road? Will Yumi ever understand what a yowling cat is trying to say to say to her? Find out in Chapter 2!