The Worst April Fool's Day Prank Ever

Part 1

Two years ago

I was dead…or that's what I thought when I opened my eyes. I was in total darkness.

"What the?" I questioned. Suddenly, I saw a bright light shine above me. I squinted up at it. "Am I in heaven?"

Suddenly, the blackness surrounding me went away, and I then saw Haley, Steve, Stan, and Francine next to me. There were lit candles lining the room.

"You guys are dead too?" I asked them.

"Yes Klaus." Hayley answered. I blinked in confusion.

"How did we all die then? I don't remember anything."

"It's all my fault." Hayley replied, looking ashamed. "I was driving drunk." I blinked at her.

"Where's Roger? Did he die too or did he go to…" I then saw Roger approach me. He was laughing.

"What?" I then heard my friends laughing too. "Guys? What are you laughing at?" Then I realized something. "Hey, wait a minute! This isn't heaven! This is home in Langley Falls, Virginia!"

"Oh Klaus," Roger chuckled. Francine went to turn on the lights, and went by us again. "Oh Klaus, you thought we were all actually dead? My gosh; you're a riot!" I looked around. The things surrounding me were boxes, now all on the floor. The 'light' I've seen was from Roger's flashlight he had in his hands. I looked at my family again, and narrowed my eyes at them all.

"You tricked me!" They all looked at me and stopped laughing.

"APRIL FOOLS!" They all shouted. Roger hit me out of my bowl and onto the floor, hooting with laugher. My family then all fell on the floor, and roared with laughter as I struggled to survive.

Last Year

I awoke when I felt a slobbery lick. It was a puppy! A brown chocolate lab puppy!

"Bark, bark!" It barked then went near Roger. "Bark, bark!" I looked at Roger, confused.

"Roger?" I asked. "What's this dog doing here?" Stan came up to me.

"Klaus," He started. "You no longer live here." I gasped.

"What, why?"

"Because you're a goldfish. You do nothing; all you do is stay in that bowl all day."

"You mean because I'm incapable of doing anything…you are replacing me with a dog?"

"That's right."

"Why?"

"He can do more, Klaus."

"Yeah!" Steve agreed. "He can do tricks; watch this!" He looked at the puppy. "Coco, sit!" Coco sat without hesitation. "Coco, speak!" Coco stood on all fours again and barked. "Good girl Coco, play dead!" Coco flopped on the floor, pretending he was dead. Steve rubbed Coco's tummy. The puppy panted happily.

"Good girl!" Steve then baby talked to the pup. "Who's a good girl, who's a good girl?" The dog barked as if saying "Me!" Steve gave the dog a biscuit and patted her. He stopped the baby talk. "Good job Coco." He stood up.

"I can play dead!" I volunteered. I pretended to play dead. "See?" Stan grabbed my bowl and carried me outside to a black van. A police officer was in the driver's seat.

"Nooo! Stan, you can't do this!" He put me in the trunk. "Stan…I'm not human yet!" I watched as the family came near. The dog was barking his head off. I looked at the lab, and narrowed my eyes at her. "You ruined my life!" Stan shut it and the van then took off. "Noooooooo!" I yelled as my family waved to me.

I was surprised suddenly when we stopped…in front of the house again. I was confused. Did the officer forget something? The officer opened the trunk. He took off his uniform, and I gasped. It was Roger!

"Roger?" I asked. "What gives? This isn't the pound, pet shop, or whatever you were planning to do with me."

The whole family then came out. Roger went by them. I looked confused at them.

"Guys? What's going on?"

"APRIL FOOLS!" They all shouted. Then the puppy knocked me to the cement with her tail. I struggled for survival.

"Good job Coco!" Steve congratulated her, the dog barked with glee, and then the whole family resumed on laughing, not at all helping me to my bowl.

Present

Roger and I were watching Animal Planet on TV. It was a documentary about goldfish. Roger was eating goldfish crackers.

"Hey!" He realized, leaning towards me. "I'm watching a documentary about goldfish with a goldfish while eating goldfish snacks! What are the odds of that?" He leaned back and took another handful. I faked a laugh.

"Yeah! What a coincidence!" I looked back at the TV.

Suddenly, Roger grabbed me by the tail. I grew wide-eyed as he opened his mouth, and dragged me closer.

"HEY!" I shouted, looking mad. He closed his mouth and looked at me.

"Oops, sorry!" He placed me back in my bowl. I looked at him madly. "It was bad enough when Stan tried to make me into a tuna sandwich due to his stupid obsession with Hayley's CD! But this, this is barbaric!" He just laughed.

"It's NOT funny!" I snapped. He stopped laughing.

"Klaus," He started. "I didn't mean it; I must've mistaken you for one of my crackers. You look so alike; I must have got carried away. It was a mistake." I rolled my eyes, not believing it one bit.

"Yeah, a mistake!"

"No Klaus, it really was a mistake."

"Yeah, sure it was." He pointed a mean finger at me.

"Now you look here fish!" He debated. "It was a mistake; it was just an honest mistk…" But he was interrupted by Stan who just walked up to us. He looked once at the TV, then at us.

"Why are you watching a documentary about goldfish? In fact, I didn't even know one existed."

"It does." Roger told him.

"Okay!" Stan then turned to me. "Hey Klaus, guess what! Today's your lucky day; we're transplanting your brain back into a human!" I gasped with joy.

"Really?" Stan nodded.

"Yes, really; you will no longer be a trapped in a goldfish's body."

"Wunderbar!" I cheered.

Then suddenly, Stan knocked my bowl, I fell on the floor, flopping for breath.

"Ha!" He laughed. "April Fools! You thought I was going to switch your brain back into a human! Ha, not in a million years!" He got out another bowl, put me into it, and placed it on the end table. He went to the other room, still laughing.

"It's not April first." I looked at Roger, still eating his crackers. "Is it?"

"No." He answered. "We just like pranking you and we're practicing for tomorrow." I looked at him, confused.

"Tomorrow?" He nodded.

"Uh huh! Tomorrow's April Fool's Day. Didn't you know that?" He ate some more.

"I…I guess I didn't. I don't have an April Fool's Day prank for you yet"

"What a shocker. Your jokes always fail anyways. I wouldn't worry about it." He continued on eating (He really liked those goldfish.) I thought about this, and then realized something.

"You know, you don't have to keep buying fishbowls if you stop knocking me to the floor every time. Heck, you don't have to buy them if I was human! The family is really wasting money every time they have to buy me a fishbowl due to a careless act."

"Nah! We got enough money. You're not getting off that easy, fish."

"You know I could die if you guys didn't give me water in time." He shrugged.

"You could; but you don't!"

"Yeah, but say it did happen! What will you do then?" He just looked at me.

"Just watch TV, fish."

I sighed as I turned to the TV. I then got an idea as I saw a dead floating goldfish, then it switched to a fish swimming in a fishbowl, and a little girl, happy she got a new pet. I turned to Roger again.

"Take me to Petco!" I blurted out. Roger was so surprised that he dropped his crackers. He looked at me.

"You want a friend, don't you? Klaus, whenever we get you a friend, you kill it, or it creeps you out."

"Well that's because it was dead! How would you feel if you had a fish carcass just floating above you?"

"Hmmm, good point. But, why Petco?" I fumbled with my fins, looking evil.

"You'll see."

"See? See what?"

"Uh, uh, Miley Cyrus is there handing out her new album." The alien then bolted out of his seat.

"OMG!" He cried. "Miley Cyrus? I'm so there!" I looked shocked. Roger hated Miley; in fact, everybody hated her in this family, even me. But whatever will make Roger come to Petco with me, I guess I'm cool with it.

Hayley then came by. She glanced at the TV, then back at us.

"Why are you watching a documentary about goldfish?" She wanted to know. Roger shrugged.

"I have no idea." He then pointed at me. "It was Klaus' idea, not mine."

"It was not!" I shot at him. He went to the TV and turned it off. He turned around.

"Anyways, we're going to Petco to see Miley Cyrus. Want to come?"

"No."

"Fine, be that way; we're going!" He went upstairs to get his disguise. Hayley just shrugged and went to the other room.

"Soon!" I said to myself. "Soon I'll have the ultimate April Fool's Day prank ever!" I then laughed evilly to myself until Stan ordered me to shut up, and then Steve because he couldn't 'concentrate' on his homework. I stopped.

Roger drove us to Petco. Today, Roger's persona was Margaret Peach. He wore a brunette wig, had a purse (when Roger asked me why the purse, I told him he might want to buy one of Miley's CDS or a ticket to her concert) lipstick, a blue shirt, purple slacks, clip on earrings, one earring was on his nose (or where his nose would be), a belly button earring, a lip earring, and even earrings on his fake eyelashes with purple eye shadow (I said he might be going overboard with the earrings, he said it made him more "Teenagy." I reminded him that a lot of teens don't wear any earrings at all; he told me just to shut up and said it made him more "hip") and a paper mache fan.

He carried me into the store. There were pets and their owners everywhere in the store either grooming, nail painting, getting a haircut, or just wandering the store and buying items they need.

"Okay fish." Roger said. "Where's Miley Cyrus?"

"She's in the fish area." I said, pointing that direction. We went to where all the fish aquariums were.

We went to one of the fish aisles and saw nothing but fish in their aquariums.

"Are you positive she's here fish? You better not be joking, it's not time yet for that. You can't prank me anyways; your jokes stink just like you." He then laughed and stopped when he noticed me glaring at him.

"Positive." I said. I then pointed at a blue curtain in the corner. "Maybe she's behind that curtain."

"Okay." He sat me down on a little table nearby. "You stay here. I'm going in!" He went to the curtain. When he was gone, behind the curtain, I quickly scanned the area.

"Okay Klaus," I told myself. "you have a little amount of time before Roger gets back. Either find a dead fish or a fish that you can kill yourself." Then from the corner of my eye, I saw it! A dead fish, but not just any dead fish, a dead goldfish, just floating on the surface of its aquarium.

"Wundarbar, just what I need!" I then realized that I was too far away from it. "Shoot. I'm too far; I need Roger so I can reach."

Roger then stormed out. He was mad. A dashound was clinging on his butt.

"Stupid Klaus!" Roger snapped at me. He went near my bowl. I turned around to look at him. "Miley Cyrus isn't here! You took me out here for nothing! I hate her even; we all hate her. Why did you drag me here?" I was about to answer, when he then showed me the dog clinging tight onto his butt. "And now I got this stupid dog biting into my butt thanks to you!" He then shook it off. "Shoo, shoo!" we then heard a "RIPPPPPP!" Roger looked behind himself and gasped! The dog had bitten part of his slacks off! The dog dropped onto the floor with part of Roger's pants and scampered back behind the curtain. "Owners need to pay more attention to their pets." He then rubbed his butt, and his eyes grew wide.

"What is it?" I asked.

"That dog stole my butt earring!" I looked puzzled at him.

"Your butt earring?" He looked up at me.

"Yeah, there was an earring on my butt, and now it's gone. You think I went too far with the earrings, don't you?" I looked a bit disturbed.

"Yeah, you went a little overboard." He sighed.

"I know." He then shrugged it off. "Well, let's leave." He then picked me up and carried me out.

He looked around the area, trying to find something to cover his butt.

"Darn it!" He said. "There's nothing here to cover my butt with. Well, hopefully nobody will notice.

A mother and child then came by us. The kid looked at the butt.

"Hey look mom!" He told her, pointing. "A full moon!"

Embarrassed, the mom shielded her son's eyes as she dragged him on.

When we were near the dead fish's aquarium, I was about to tell Roger to stop. I was very fortunate that a plump woman came to us. She asked about her dog. Roger told her the dog went behind the curtain.

I quickly grabbed the dead fish and placed it in Roger's purse. I zipped it shut so Roger wouldn't notice. I was ready now. I waited for Roger.

Roger got whacked in the cheek by the lady's purse. She grabbed her dog and rushed off. Roger rubbed his cheek.

"And next time, keep an eye on your pooch, lady!" He yelled after the departing mad woman carrying her dog in her arms.

Before we went home, Roger ran into the restroom to get a paper towel to cover his you-know-what with after he just couldn't take it anymore with the people laughing every time we passed by.

When we were home, Roger put me on the table and went upstairs to change. To my horror, he bought the purse with him! I crossed my fins.

"Please don't look in the purse," I prayed to myself. "Please don't look in the purse!"

Roger then went back down, purse in hand, in his usual form and without the towel.

"Oh Klaus!" He said. "I forgot something." He went near me and smacked me to the floor. "Ha, ha! Goodnight, fish!" He then went back upstairs. I looked at Stan, standing next to me with an extra fishbowl.

"I know he was going to do that." He said. He grabbed me by the tail, placed me in the bowl, and set it on the table.

"Well Klaus," He said. "See you tomorrow!" He waved to me, and went upstairs.

I fumbled with my fins when he was gone with a mischievirous grin.

"Yes Stan, tomorrow! See you tomorrow." I then began to sing from one of my favorite movies, Annie.

"Tomorrow," I sang. "Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love ya, tomorrow. You're only a dayyyyyyy awayyyyyyyyy!"

"Shut up Klaus!" Stan shouted from upstairs. I stopped, grinned, and then fell asleep.

In the morning, Stan came down the stairs.

"Good morning family!" He suddenly slipped on a banana peel that was on the stairs. "Whoa!" He screamed as he stumbled down the stairs. Roger came down with the purse from yesterday, laughing hysterically.

"APRIL FOOLS!" He shouted, rolling on the stairs, laughing. "You really fell for it!" When Stan came down the stairs, he stepped on a single rollerblade, and it zoomed off with him in it. This made Roger laugh louder. The rest of the family came down to see what all the commotion was about.

Suddenly, Stan was heading towards me, still trying to catch his balance. I panicked.

"STAN!" Francine shouted, fear in her voice. "Look out for the fishbowl!" Too late, Stan rammed into me and I flew and crashed into the side wall, falling to the ground. My cup was next to me conviently. Stan had flipped onto the sofa, my water bowl on his head. He tried to take it off, but was unsuccessful. The family all rushed to him. Roger sat his purse down. Roger was no longer laughing; he was now bug-eyed with shock.

"Oh my gosh! Stan, are you alright?" Stan took off the bowl and looked at his family.

"No!" He said with a sad sniff with tears in his eyes. "I think I broke a bone in my leg; I'll need to go to a hospital." The family gasped.

"Stan!" Roger then began to cry. "I'm sorry!" He cried in the agent's lap. Stan laughed. Roger stopped crying and looked at him.

"Why are you laughing?" He asked. Stan stopped and looked at him.

"April fools!" He told him. "I'm fine!" Roger looked mad.

"That was a mean joke Stan!" He scolded. "I thought I really hurt you. You should be ashamed."

"You're right; I'm sorry. Let's just get Klaus into his bowl."

While this was all happening, I jumped into my cup, went to the purse, unzipped, got the dead fish, (Yes, it was still there) and zipped it shut. I then tossed it on the floor, and went as fast as I could and hid behind the wall in the corner. I looked out at my family, grinning.

"Uh guys," Steve started. "I don't think we can prank Klaus today, or for eternity for that matter." Roger looked at him.

"Why?" He wanted to know. Steve pointed at the dead fish body on the floor. The family looked at where the boy was pointing too, and gasped. Stan went to the lifeless body and picked it up by the tail.

"Oh my gosh." He said. "What have we done? Klaus is… dead."

Francine went by her husband's side to comfort him. I could see a teardrop streaming down her face, she sniffed. Stan had a teardrop steaming down his cheek too. I looked at the rest of the family. They all had teardrops in their eyes, wiping them away.

I grinned. Me, I was happy for what I've done. For years, I have tried pulling pranks on my family and had failed miserably. Now, I was happy, I had finally pulled the ultimate prank.

I scurried to the center of room and held up my fins.

"APIL FOOLS!" I shouted. They didn't listen or even look up. They just kept on crying.

"April Fools!" Still, they were too busy crying too hear me. I put my fins down.

"Uh, April Fools! Come on guys, it was only a joke! Just an honest jo…" Then at that instant I realized that I had done something terribly wrong.