Disclaimer: I do not own Sherlock. That honour lies with Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Moffat and Gatiss. I can dream though!
"Where to gents?"
"221B Baker Street please."
"Alright then."
"John . . . "
"Yes Sherlock?"
" . . . "
"Sherlock?"
"John, what is a zombie apocalypse?"
"Sorry?"
"I heard a couple of Lestrade's people talking about it. They sounded excited. What is it?"
"Ummm, a zombie apocalypse is where the world is overrun by zombies and society collapses. There's a whole bunch of new movies about it - couple of TV shows too."
"Okay, but what's a zombie?"
"Seriously?"
"I obviously deleted it."
"A zombie is a human - generally infected with some sort of disease - that has become brain-dead -"
"You mean Anderson? Why would people be excited about him?"
"Let me finish Sherlock! A zombie feeds on human flesh and can pretty much only be killed by chopping off it's head."
" . . . "
"Sherlock?"
"Why would people want that though?"
"I don't know, it's probably some new fad."
" . . . "
" . . . "
"Do you think you would survive a zombie apocalypse?"
"Probably. Why are you smirking?"
"How would you survive a zombie hoarde? You almost excreted in your trousers when you found that spider in the bath yesterday!"
"Sherlock, that wasn't a spider. That was a bloody tarantula! And you still haven't told me how you got a hold of it!"
"I know somebody who knows somebody who knows somebody's brother-in-law. He helped me out."
"What?"
"Irrelevant, it's gone now."
"Good. Please don't put exotic animals in the bathroom again."
"Hmmm."
"Oh god. There's another one isn't there?"
"Diamond crested python. Nothing dangerous."
" . . . "
"John?"
"It's got to be a bad thing that I'm not even surprised anymore."
"Uh gents, we're here."
"Sherlock you pay the cabbie. I got the last . . . "
"What is it John?"
"Mrs. Hudson!"
"What about her?"
"She cleans our bathroom on Wednesday's!"
A/N: This came to me in the middle of the night.
Seriously, here I was nearly fast asleep, when Sherlock comes along and pokes me on the shoulder asking me what a zombie apocalypse is. The man is relentless. And here we are.
Thank you for reading.
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