ONE FINAL GIFT
Kate was relieved that Caleb Brown's murder case was over. That FINALLY Locsat was in custody and no longer a threat to her or Rick. So tired and hungry, she had to force one foot in front of the other to reach the bedroom. She really needed a shower but just didn't have the energy right now. Maybe after dinner, she was sure her husband would help her clean up...among other things. Smiling she shrugged out of her jacket. Kate was puzzled when she heard two voices coming from the kitchen area. Who else could be there at this time of night? After everything they had been through in the last few weeks, all Kate wanted was peace and quiet and some time alone with her husband.
Maybe it was her cop's instinct or the tone of Rick's voice but she reached for her gun and hurried back to the kitchen area. She skidded to a halt seeing Caleb Brown. Kate has spent the last ten days trying to solve his murder but the man was very much alive and pointing a gun at Rick. How was that possible? It took her mind a few seconds to process it all. "NO!" She raised her weapon and pulled the trigger twice. She turned and saw Rick fall, she'd shot Caleb a second too late. Kate barely noticed as Caleb slid down the wall with a look of stunned disbelief on his dying face. Her concern was for her husband, he wasn't moving. "Rick?" How badly was he hit? She heard a low groan of pain from him. Why did she leave him to cook dinner alone? She should have stopped Caleb before he could get off a shot.
Kate tried to run to Rick but her body suddenly felt like it was on fire and her legs just wouldn't hold her up anymore. Pain ripped through her as they gave out and she landed on the floor. Kate didn't care about her own pain, she had to check on Rick. Using the last of her strength she crawled over to him as his hand reached out to her. "Kate run, Caleb is alive!"
Just as she touched his hand, Kate felt his warm fingers surround hers but she had no strength left to get any closer. She was fighting a losing battle with a dense black fog that made it hard to breathe and impossible to keep her eyes open. She never heard Alexis arriving moments later with a bottle of champagne so they could all celebrate the end of Locsat or the frantic calls Rick's daughter made to the police and for two ambulances.
From faraway an annoying beeping noise pulled Kate unwillingly from a deep sleep. She knew at once she was no longer in The Loft because this room was much too white and noisy. She tried to move but nothing happened. Kate tried to focus on the person who was standing over her...it clearly wasn't Rick. Where was Rick? How badly was he hurt? She had a hundred questions but no words emerged. Unable to move or talk she began to panic.
"Mrs. Castle, I am Dr. Anderson, try to breathe normally. We have a tube helping you, don't try to fight it or talk just now. When you're a little stronger we will remove it. You were shot. We've removed the bullets and repaired the damage. You've lost a lot of blood…." His words faded for a moment. "We've given you something for the pain, it will make you sleepy. You have visitors asking to see you, perhaps in a few days when you're stronger, right now you need to rest."
Kate tried to shake her head but again nothing happened. She didn't care about her condition or her visitors. What about Rick? She had to know that he was OK. How could she rest until she could see Rick, touch him? Kate wanted to scream in frustration as her eyes closed against her will. It felt like she was falling down an endless black hole. It seemed to take forever to hit bottom but when she did, somehow Kate landed on her feet and she was back in The Loft, gun in hand. Was this was a dream or had she been given a second chance to save Rick?
Caleb Brown was laughing at Rick. He was boasting how easy it had been to play him, to play them both. Kate was so angry to find it had been all a lie. He'd faked his death to help Locsat. Mason Wood, a man Rick trusted as a friend, turned out to be Locsat and he wanted them both dead. The whole phony murder case had been a lure, a trap Caleb and Mason prepared not only to kill them but watch them die and leave no trace of their crime. Kate got more angry at all the wasted time they had all spent looking for the man that killed Caleb. Brown was very much alive and he'd come to finish the job his boss started. Since Locsat was dismantled and Mason was in custody, killing her and Rick meant they could not testify against them...This was all her fault. Rick asked her so many times in the last five years to give up the search; to stop looking for the men behind her mother's death and who later killed Bracken but she always put "the job" first. He told her many times finding that answer wasn't worth her life. Now this damned case may have cost her the love of her life and their "always".
She watched as the bullet from Caleb's gun travelled in slow motion hitting Rick's chest. She tried to stop it but she was too late again. Kate jumped at the look of shock and pain on Rick's face. She remembered that feeling all too well. She had also once been shot in the chest. She survived that bullet and so would Rick, he had too. He said he would "always" be there for her. Rick had never once broken a promise to her. If she could just touch him, Kate knew everything would be fine. Just as her fingers reached his, he was gone. Suddenly she was back in the bright room unable to talk or move. All Kate felt was searing pain. "We are removing the breathing tube now, Mrs. Castle. Try to blow out a breath, good! Don't try to talk just yet." He placed a smaller oxygen tube around her head and into her nostrils. He reached for some water and was stunned to hear her croak out one word. "Rick!"
Kate saw a warning look pass between the doctor and Victoria Gates. "Kate, you know the drill. I need to take your statements on the shooting, first...when you are up to it, of course." Turning to the doctor the lieutenant continued. "Doctor, I have a man posted outside this door. I want to know the minute she can talk without endangering her health. I will let her family and friends know that she is out of immediate danger."
Kate relaxed hearing that "her family" which consisted of Rick, her dad, Martha, Alexis, Lani, Javi and Kevin, were all OK and waiting for her to be well enough to have visitors. Surely they would let he know if her husband was in critical condition or worse...Kate's mind would not allow herself to finish that thought. Seeing Gates leave, she stopped the doctor by banging on the bed rails with her hand. "Rick, shot, bad?"
"Mrs Castle, your husband is still in surgery." Kate knew instantly he was lying and shook her head. "He was in surgery...I don't have any updated...I'm sorry there was just too much damage. Mr. Castle died on the operating table, two days ago. After your surgery we nearly lost you too so we had to keep you sedated for last three days to help your body recover..."
Kate stopped listening, suddenly it felt like her lungs just stopped working. The steady beat of the heart monitor doubled, causing warning alarms to sound. This was another dream, a very bad dream, it had to be. Rick always managed to survive whatever happened and he made sure she did too. No, this had to be a nightmare…he would be there besides her smiling when she woke up. Oh please, let him be there! The dark fog pulled her back under and the noise of all the alarms faded.
"Clear the room now, crash cart, code blue room 1017."
"That news could have waited!" Victoria Gates was pushed aside by more nurses as a crash cart was pushed closer to the bed.
Slowly the blackness gave way to grey and the blurry face by her side slowly settled into the very worried face of her father.
"Hey Katie bug, you gave me quite a scare. I am an old man. You have to stop getting into trouble, getting shot." He leaned over to kiss her forehead. "It was touch and go for a few days but you'll both be fine." Kate face instantly relaxed and her smile slowly got bigger. It had been a just bad dream. Her dad would never lie to her. Rick was OK. Her throat still felt raw and Kate's attempts to speak just came out as a squeek.
"No, none of that young lady! You rest. The whole story of what happened can wait. The doctor won't let anyone but me in to see you until you're stronger. Now rest and later on they said they would try to let you eat something, maybe some soup or jello." Kate nodded and felt the pull of her pain meds draw her into sleep again.
Knowing that Kate would sleep for a few hours, Jim Beckett slowly rose from the chair by his daughter's bed. His knees and back cracked loudly in protest and he held onto the back of the chair until the pins and needles in his legs slowly subsided. There were three anxious people, her police friends, waiting for any news about Kate. Opening the door, he was stunned to see there were five people now waiting, including Martha. Dressed in black she looked much older but then so did Alexis, the grief of their recent loss was written all over their faces.
"How is she?" Martha stood and walked over to Jim pulling him into a hug.
"She finally came out of the coma, she is out of danger but you need to rest, Martha. You both need to take care of each other. You've been through so much, too much in the last week." Jim opened his arms and they were soon full of two sobbing redheads.
He was stunned they had come each day until Kate woke up. He saw the trace of a smile on the faces of Kate's friends from the precinct. They had all been waiting days for any good news. "The doctor's won't let anyone in until she is stronger. I'll let her know you've been here for her but please go home for now, all of you."
"Yes, I will go back to The Loft to rest for now. We can come back tomorrow or whenever the doctors say it's OK with some her things for Kate. She will want her own clothes when she is well enough to be moved out of that horrible ICU room. I've arranged for a private suite. No, no, Jim. I insist, she is family and when you need to take a break please stay with us, you're family too."
"Let me take you home, Mrs. R. That way you won't have to deal with the press."
Jim nodded to Kevin Ryan. "Thank you, Detective, I forgot about the press. I'll stay for now, they are bringing in a reclining chair for me. We all need to get some rest. Kate still has a long recovery ahead of her. She will need us, need all of us to be there for her and for the baby."
"Yes, she'll need us. We all lost Richard but at least she still has a part of him. It will be hard for her but Kate is strong, she will want to get well for their child…and we'll be there to help them both."
Kate felt better when she woke again the next day. Her first words were about Rick. When could see him and if they could be moved into a room together. Jim looked at the doctor and then reached for her hand. "Katie, don't you remember? Rick didn't make it, the bullet hit his heart and there was just too much damage to repair."
"NO! You said we BOTH would be fine. How could you lie to me, Dad?"
"Kate, I was talking about you and the baby. It was nothing short of a miracle that you survived and the bullets missed hitting him or her. Even with the shock of the shooting, the blood loss and all the surgeries, somehow you did not miscarry. Rick may be gone but he is still watching over you and his child."
"Rick is gone? No! He can't be, I'd feel it. He said he would be with me, always. Wait Dad, did you say I'm pregnant?"
"You didn't know about the baby?"
"No, once we found Locsat, we planned to take some time off. Rick wanted to take me to Europe for a belated honeymoon. He really wanted to try to have a baby, so we decided that I would go off the pill. If I got pregnant then I was going to ask for a leave of absence from the NYPD. We were going to tell everyone about our plans once I got that time off approved. Rick made plans for an extended vacation...mixed in with a few book signing, of course. He was so excited about it, he loves...loved to surprise me with special gifts." Kate hated to cry but suddenly she felt hollow, she could not longer feel the connection to Rick anymore and the tears fell. Jim held her for a long time and then helped her lay back on the pillows drying her tears.
"He can't be with you anymore but he gave you the gift of hislove, his baby. So a part of him is still with you. Honey, I know what it's like to loose the one you love. When I lost your mother I knew she wanted me to be there for you…..I didn't do a very good job of that but I promise I will be there for you and the baby this time. I'm going to a grandfather and I know you will be a great mother. Rick loved you and you loved him. Your love made this baby. He would want you to be strong and get well again. You need to get well for Rick and for your child but also for me and his family. We all want to help you."
"Oh God, Martha and Alexis, they must hate me! It's my fault Rick is dead. Alexis told me that she knew one day she would loose her father because he worked with me, helped and protected me. She was right. Rick is dead because he was helping me go after Locstat."
"No Kate, that's not true, a crazy man shot him, shot you both in your own home. Martha and Alexis love you, they have been at this hospital every day waiting and hoping for you to get better. They insisted I stay at The Loft when I need to shower, change and get something decent to eat. When you are up to it, they want to see you. They are paying for this fancy room and hoped that you would want to rest and recover at the beach house when you can finally leave the hospital. They know Rick loved you just as much as he loved them, maybe even more. He loved you so much, you are part of their family and they love you too. You are carrying Rick's baby. Your baby is a living link to the man they loved and lost. Katie, I know it will be hard but you are so strong. You need to focus on recovering and being there as your child grows. This baby is Rick's final gift of love to you."
RICK'S POV
Rick felt as if he had been hit in the chest by a truck. It was all but was impossible to move or breathe until he saw Kate crawling towards him. He looked away from her for just one second to confirm that Caleb Brown was really dead this time. Rick knew this mess was his fault. Mason Woods had fooled him completely but not Kate. She always said that he only saw the good in people. She saw everyone as a suspect. Kate shot Caleb and saved him once again. Caleb Brown was Locsat's right hand man. He faked his death to help Mason set a trap to kill them both. Using every ounce of strength he had left, Rick stretched out his arm and closed his fingers around Kate's. They felt so small and so cold.
Rick knew Kate had been shot, he could see a growning pool of blood on the floor beside her. She needed his help now. Ignoring his own pain, he moved to reach into his pants pocket with his free hand, hoping that his phone was there and it wasn't broken. He frowned at the very cracked screen but pressed the panic button that Kevin Ryan had recently installed. He smiled knowing that help was now on the way. Almost immediately he heard a loud roar as a cold blackness closed in on him.
The express elevator the penthouse was too damned slow. Ryan was digging in his wallet to locate the spare key to The Loft that Castle had given him months ago. On arriving Esposito took more a direct route, kicking the door open with his gun drawn. "Castle!"
"What the fuck?" First thing Kevin saw were streaks of blood on the kitchen wall and their murder victim Caleb Brown sitting against the wall covered in fresh blood. From force of habit Ryan kicked the gun out of his limp hand and checked for a pulse. That was when he saw another trail of blood. "Javi, call for ambulance. No two, we need two here now, it's Kate and Rick." He checked Kate first, her skin felt cold and he could find no pulse. "NO, no way, not now, come on Kate, stay with us!" He stripped off his suitcoat, covered her and then turned to check on Castle. He was also cold but Kevin did find a pulse. It was weak and thready but it was there. "Throw me a blanket from the sofa. Where the hell are the paramedics?"
"On the way, four minutes out. I used the "officer down" code to get them here faster."
Those four minutes felt like a lifetime. When the paramedics arrived, they got Kate's heart started again and loaded them both into separate ambulances going to Mt. Sinai Trauma Unit. "I sent a uniform to collect Alexis from her Dad's office. She will let Mrs. R know what's happened and where to go. We need to get word to Kate's Dad but I only know he is somewhere in Europe." Esposito paused, "Bro, I am not calling Lieutenant Gates now, you know she will tell us to wait at the scene until she arrives. I'll have a patrolman seal the scene and guard the door until Karpowski or another detective can get here. You go with Castle, I'll go with Kate."
More than six hours later the waiting room was full of NYPD. Martha came 20 minutes after Alexis. Both women sat holding onto each other, trying to be strong as the hours dragged slowly by. Lanie arrived but even with all her friends on staff, she could only learn that both victims were still in surgery. Rick had taken a shot close to his heart. He was now in a medically induced coma. The doctors put him on the heart-lung machine as they worked to repair the damage. If he survived the surgery, loss of blood and shock, he had a chance of recovering. However, Kate had massive internal injuries. Her heart had stopped more than once during surgery and they having problems stopping all the internal bleeding. Because of all the previous damage to her heart and lungs, it did not look good for her. Jim Beckett arrived several hours later. He barely had time to greet everyone in the waiting room when a nurse called out, "Family of Katherine Beckett". He was led away to meet with his daughter's surgical team. He was gone a very long time.
Martha stood as he walked back into the waiting room looking pale, sad and very lost. She gathered him into a hug not needing to ask what the doctor told him, it was all too obvious that Kate was gone. "I tried, your son tried but she just wouldn't listen to me, to Rick...to anyone. I told her to stop chasing after the men behind her mother's death. I knew it would end this way one day."
Martha helped him over to a chair, she held one of his hands and Alexis held the other. Javi helped a distraught Lanie from the waiting room to take her home. Kevin left after expressing his condolences to Jim. He was heading back to the scene. The case of Caleb Brown's murder had all been a lie, a hoax to lure Rick and Kate into a trap. Mason Wood was in custody and Kevin made a vow he would pay for the death of his captain and best friend, Kate Beckett.
More than an hour later the surgeon leading Castle's team came out to speak to his family. "He survived the surgery but it will take a day or two to wean him from the heart lung machine and even longer for him to come out of the medically induced coma. When he wakes, barring any other complications he'll be moved from the ICU to a private room in five to seven days. After that, he will need a lot support and rehabilitation as he recovers. Understand that his recovery will take months, maybe even a year."
"Can we see him, please?"
"Not right now. He is still in the OR recovery room. Once he's been moved to his room in the ICU you can see him. However, visits will only be for a few minutes, only the immediate family and just one at a time. It's going to be several more hours until you can see him. You should go home, eat and try to get some rest."
"Thank you, doctor." Martha exhaled as she pulled Alexis into a hug. Somehow it felt wrong to be happy with Kate gone but her son was alive. He would need all their love and his strength to recover. Richard was a strong man but would he be able to handle the loss of Katherine? Would he want to? She looked over at Jim and lost her spark of joy, it wasn't just her son that lost Kate. Martha knew that Jim would need help to make the final arrangements for his daughter. He would need all their support so he would not return to drinking as he had when he lost his wife. "Jim, let's go back to The Loft for now. You shouldn't be alone at a time like this. Alexis, come with us now. You can change and come back later to see your father. We'll take turns being with him until he's moved into a regular room and can have visitors." Alexis nodded and helped a very unsteady Jim Beckett to stand and leave the hospital.
Alexis returned six hours later and she was allowed to see and be with her father for the first time in days. She was told she could only stay five minutes. Her hands were shaking as she walked closer. She barely recognized the man in the bed. His hair was a mess and his skin looked so pale but his cheeks and chin were covered in stubble. Her Dad was a big man but now he looked so small surrounded by all the huge machines and monitors. Having worked in the morgue, she had seen much worse but this time the man in the bed was someone she loved, it was her father. Sitting in a chair a nurse brought in, she gently touched her father's hand. Alexis closed her eyes and sighed in relief when it felt soft and warm like always. She stayed that way, her hand covering his, looking at the man in the bed and then at all the machines and monitors surrounding his bed. The noise of the machines was both scary and annoying: the clunk, swish of the respirator, the whir, click of the heart lung machine and the beeps of the various monitors. Alexis almost started to cry when she saw small smears of blood on her dad's hospital gown and on the visible bandage. She began to rub her thumb over the top of his hand but stopped suddenly when she touched his wedding ring. Kate was gone, his muse, the inspiration for all his stories, his wife and the love of his life.
Alexis had not been Kate's biggest fan. At first, she didn't trust her, later she didn't want to see her Dad hurt physically or emotionally. He told Alexis that Kate made him happy but at first she didn't see it. She got angry that her father had been hurt following Beckett around more than once. Maybe she was also a just little jealous of just how much time her Dad spent with Kate and how much he loved her. Until Kate Beckett came into his life, Alexis had been her father's whole world. Learning to share her father had been a slow process but once they were married, Alexis knew just how happy Kate did make her father. Would he want to live if she was gone? Alexis grew more concerned as she realized that with his wife dead, her Dad might not want to go on and maybe he wouldn't even try to get well.
For the next week, Martha and Alexis spent all of their time, except for Kate's funeral, in the hospital. Little by little the machines disappeared, Rick's color improved and ten days later he opened his eyes for the first time. Neither woman was very surprised that his first question was to ask about Kate. The doctors had warned them not to tell him about his wife's death, at least not until he was much stronger. Martha called on her skill as an actress to deflect his questions. However, as he slowly grew stronger they couldn't delay telling him the truth much longer. Martha was stunned that Jim offered to let Rick know about Kate. Martha arranged with Rick's doctor to allow James Beckett into the ICU.
The minute Kate's father walked into his room, Rick knew what he was going to say. His eyes filled with tears as the gentle words the older man used to tell him what had happened felt a thousand times worse than being shot in the chest. It was just so unfair! Locsat had been found and was in custody, they finally had a chance for a happy life together but now Kate was gone. There would be no "always" for them.
Loosing her was the one thing Rick feared since they first met. She was a cop, her job was dangerous. He wasn't really trained for it but he tried to be there for her, help her and had saved her life more than once. Now that his daughter was all grown up and away at college, it felt good to be needed again. Working with her had been fun and a great source of inspiration and material for his writing but Rick knew a long time ago that shadowing Kate for his research had just become an excuse to be near her.
Little by little, she let him in. He got to know the real Kate. Not the hard nosed, bad-ass detective façade she showed to the world. He saw what she never allowed anyone else but him to see. The vulnerable, broken woman that needed him desperately. He promised to always love, care for and help her heal. Why did she have to die but he was left still alive? How could he live without her? What was there to live for? All his dreams and plans for their future were just...gone.
As he watched Jim leave, Rick felt pain in his chest that had nothing to do with the bullet. Rick immediately felt guilty that he had not tried to comfort Kate's father. Jim now had nothing and no one. Rick still had Alexis and his mother...but he still wanted and needed Kate. It was his fault that she died. He trusted Mason Wood and the man used him to lure Kate into a trap that led to her death. Rick endangered his daughter, his mother, everyone he loved because he wasn't smart enough to see through the man's lies or strong enough to beat him. Maybe living without Kate was the penance he would have to endure for his arrogance and stupidity.
Kate often told Rick that he was too trusting. He'd been hurt by people in the past that he'd trusted but this time she paid the price for his mistake. Rick was angry. He should have put his foot down sooner. Forced Kate to let the investigation into Locsat go but he failed at that too. He failed to protect her, to save her. He nearly died from a bullet to the chest but now Rick had an even bigger hole in his heart left by Kate's death.
Martha and Alexis slowly came forward and gently hugged him. "I am so sorry, Richard. The doctors wouldn't let us tell you about Katherine until you were stronger."
"I don't know if I'll ever be strong enough for a life without her. What do I do now?"
Alexis reached for his hand. "You still have us and we love you, Dad."
"I love you too, Pumpkin but you're all grown up now. You are off to college now and will be busy starting your own life. You don't really need me anymore but Kate did. She was my life now. How can I write about Nikki anymore? I made all these plans for us. I wanted to take her away for a belated honeymoon for six months, maybe a year or two. I planned to take her to all the places she'd dreamed of: returning to Russia, the Orient, Europe and the Caribbean. We wanted to explore it all together and maybe I could convince her to take time off to have a baby."
Rick reached out to caress his daughter's face. "Oh God, I so wanted to have another beautiful baby girl like you with Kate. I pictured our baby so many times. Unlike you, our baby would have had dark hair and maybe Kate's amazing hazel eyes…" Rick closed his eyes, at first they thought he had drifted into sleep until his Mother saw a single tear run down his cheek. She ran her hand gently across the cheek to wipe the moisture away.
"Richard, I know how much you loved Katherine. She would want you to get better and go on with your life. Darling, we love and need you too. Jim will need all of us to be strong for him. I know it will be hard for you but you have the strength to get well. Once you can leave the hospital and the city, we'll all go to the beach house. You need time to recover in more ways than one." Martha sat in the chair Alexis brought to his bedside.
"Katherine was so proud that you wrote about her and she loved your writing. You still have one last book to finish on your contract with Black Pawn. When you are feeling better, I think it will help you to heal by writing one last Nikki Heat story. Honor her memory by giving Katherine the happy ending in your pages that she never got in life. Give Nikki and Rook the "always" that you wanted to give her.
Martha smiled watching a small spark of life come into her son's eyes as he slowly nodded at her suggestion. "You're right, I think Kate would like that."
Martha nodded at him, silently saying a prayer of thanks to Kate. Her death could have taken the will to live away from her son but writing a happily ever after for Kate would give him a motivation to get better and live. It was her last gift of love to him.