A/N: Okies, this is basically my first fanfiction, so it's probably not that good. My aim with this is to go from uber-serious-romance-drama to omg-ha-ha-hilarious-comedic-funniness of sorts. First chapter, kind of short, yeah, but you'll live, and I'll try to update soon. In fact, I'll do everything in my power to update soon.
I am not a very powerful person.
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own Death Note, or any of the characters. And that really sucks for me. I want Mello. T.T
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It an ordinary, monotonous, boring, unexciting, gloomy, uninteresting day for the blonde, chocolate-loving gang leader, and as he went about his business which can be described by all the adjectives previously used to describe his day in general, he, not very surprisingly, became extremely bored.
As he munched on a bar of chocolate, as he always seemed to have one with him, he glanced at a rack of magazines in a nearby shop. On the cover of several fashion magazines, displayed in the front, was a photograph of the up-and-coming model, Amane Misa. Hn...always the same old magazines, with the same old over-commercialized models...who's even stupid enough to read this trash!? Actually, prior to thinking that, he had been wanting to pick up a copy, but had realized he didn't have any extra cash on him, so he was coping with that fact by putting down the magazine and all of it's readers.
The blonde took one more particularly agressive bite out of his chocolate bar before turning on his heel and walking away from the large storefront windows without another thought on the magazine issue.
"Mello..." a readhead murmered, lowering the magazine, one of the ones Mello had just been looking at, from his face as he stood inside the store. Unfortunately for Matt, his old friend was already long gone by the time he made any move to go follow him. Instead, a rather strange scene appeared in front of him: the very same fashion model on the magazine cover ran up and tackled a teenager walking the streets, causing him to let out a surprised yell and try to dodge the flying supermodel, but to no avail. He was soon being smothered by her and she seemed completely oblivious to the extreme discomfort she was obviously causing the teenager who, though nobody there could have guessed it, was actually a certain mass-murderer/passer of divine judgement.
Matt's attention was then diverted as he saw something that was almost as strange as the scene a few feet to the right of it. An apple, seemingly suspended in midair, was slowly disappearing as though bites were being taken from it. Of course, if Matt had somehow touched a Death Note, he would have seen a God of Death devouring said apple, which may have been a even stranger of a sight. Despite the small crowd who was now gathering around the apple, which was being devoured by a 'vortex' according to a certain conspiracy freak who happened to be somewhere in the vicinity, and around the celebrity who had appeared and was now surrounded by fanboys who were expressing signs of jealously towards Light, who was nowhere near enjoying himself at the moment.
Meanwhile, Mello, who had noticed the gathering crowds, had taken a few back in the direction of them and not bothered to notice Matt, still standing there, watching everything unfold. As he finished another bite of chocolate, he turned his head in the direction of the model who had just been pushed aside by her savior and the love of her life(at least for now), and blinked as she smiled shyly in his direction and her cheeks turned a faint shade of pink.
He quickly turned his head to the left and right, looking for perhaps some male model or celebrity, but saw no one other than some not-so-good-looking fanboys and a very eccentric man who was no doubt there to investigate the 'apple-gulping vortex' incident, which was indeed still going on, as Ryuk had not yet left the scene. A...supermodel...likes...me? What. the. hell? Then again...I'm not complaining. He smirked to himself and took another bite of the chocolate, casting one last glance back at the girl before walking off, thoroughly pleased with himself.
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Later the very same evening, the man who could have easily passed off as one of the conspiracy freaks at the scence but was in actuality all three of the world's greatest criminal investigators rolled into one, was watching the news report which covered one very unusual story: 'Traveling Black Hole Devours City's Apples.' The detective licked his spoon clean of ice cream, paused for a moment, then plunged the spoon into a bag of sugar he always had situated conveniently next to him and began to shovel mounds of pure sugar onto his already sugar-loaded ice-cream sundae.
...'Apple-loving vortex causes havoc throughout Harajuku district... The details of the report ran through his extremely active mind as he debated whether or not to go out and have a look at the apple-loving 'vortex' himelf. After all, it could turn out to be an important scientific discovery...or a crack story that would forever tarnish his reputation as the genius super-sleuth that he was. Then again, if he went out to have a look, nobody would know that he was L, and there was no harm in a little 'scientific investigation.'
And so, it was decided that the sugar-crazed ace detective would make a sort of research trip to the park where apple-addict of a Shinigami, Ryuk, had wandered to, given the fact that Light had been long dragged off by his obsessive, smothering fashion icon of a girlfriend and no Shinigami would want to be subjected to the same earbleed-inducing torture that Light was put through if he had any choice. Apparently, Ryuk had a choice. That was mainly because Light actually had no way to stop him from wandering off while he was being hung on by who was possibly the most annoying(in poor Kira's opinion, at least) celebrity in existance.
It just so happened to be that, under some extremely bizarre circumstances that really can't be explained or understood to any extent at the moment, the chocolate-addict of a mafia boss, clad all in black leather and metal chains, laces, and zippers that couldn't possibly serve any real purpose, had chosen to take a walk to that very same park, all the while taking bites out of a very expensive brand of chocolate bar, silvery wrapper pulled down halfway, exposing the dark brown delecacy inside. Each bite he took, he made the fragment of chocolate bar linger in his mouth as long as he could, savoring the rich, creamy flavor as though it was the last piece of cocoa-derived deliciousness he would ever taste. A rather unlikely prospect, as he always had a steady supply on hand.