Author's Notes: You know those airport/train station scenes in the movies? Dramatic music playing in the background, one lover stopping another before they leave forever. Confessions are made. Yeah, this is totally a parallel rip to Rainy Oblivion (rain scenes in that one, in case ya'll forgot :]) and I decided to experiement with Hermione and Ron this time. God knows I'm a dedicated Draco/Hermione shipper, but seriously.. Ron and Hermione are too cute NOT to like. So let me know what you thought of my first stab. It's not the best, I know.. but there's always going to be tons of room for improvement.
Oh, right.. and enjoy :) R&R! 3
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At The Train Station
"Bullocks," I snorted as I picked up my pace. "It was ridiculous! We're never going to the movers again!"
"The movies," Harry blew into his hands and shivered before her rubbed them together rapidly trying to produce heat. "They're called movies Ron, and I do admit... that one was a little bland." He pushed his glasses up his nose with a gloved hand.
Bland wasn't the correct word. I was thinking of impossible. The lead heroin, an attractive young bloke with blonde hair was determined to keep his lover, a lovely young girl with dark brown hair. She had been transferred to a job in the States and was going to leave him, so he runs after her all the way to the airport, some kind of muggle transportation center with flying machines. Anyway, he runs after her and is pushing through the security devices, rudely shoving past people left and right and then professes undying love to the girl. She gets all teary eyed and of course wants to snog him senseless because he's quite good looking. So obviously she realizes she fancied him and he meant more to her than some bloody job in the States so she cries a ruddy river and they embrace and there's that lovely ending for you.
Bullocks. Total bullocks.
Maybe I'm reacting this way out of bitterness. I would never have the courage to do something so heroic and brave, even if there was a girl I fancied that much. A girl I (well pardon the overused mover– I mean, movie phrase, but I just came out of watching a dreadful one)... a girl I loved more than life itself.
Hermione...
The December cold was dancing all around us. The crisp flakes of snow fell gently down through the open train platform. I watched carefully as a couple walked past us, a suitcase in each hand, trying to find their respective trains. The sky was bleak and it was bloody freezing.
I clamped my hands into my pockets and shivered. "Where's Hermione? You'd think she'd be on time for her own train if the girl has a scheduled time to brush her teeth at night,"
Harry adjusted his hat so it fell low and his unruly black hair peaked out from below as he turned to me and cracked a smile. "Her and Malfoy went out to lunch before, that's probably what's keeping them,"
Right. Malfoy. He was the one who stole her away from me. Both Harry and I were, and still are, recovering from the shock of our Hermione dating Draco Malfoy of all people. I can only begin to hallucinate reasons why she would want to, but what hurts even more than dreaming up lies is living in the truth - she loved him, and why... I'll never understand, all I could understand was that she did.
I think she fancied me at one point too. Of course, I'll always wonder if she knew how I felt about her.
How I still feel about her.
Pathetic, I know.
How I love her to the point where I find it okay for her to be with a git like Malfoy if it made her happy. Love her to that one exact moment in my life where I wonder if there's anyone else who can love this hard and this much for one human being.
Note to self: try to change that.
"So are you going to just let her go?" Harry asked softly.
I turned to look at him, my shoulders slumping slightly (bad habit mum's been trying to correct of mine for years). Harry was my first real friend and is one of my best. I knew him before Hermione walked into our lives. But, I honestly think if it weren't for her, we'd both be dead. Or without an eye. Or both.
I shuddered at the thought before I focused back on Harry.
"Yes," I said without much hesitation and very dryly for that matter. "She's got Malfoy. She's happy,"
"You'll never know if you don't try," Harry responded.
I've tried. Believe me, I've tried. If you would sit down with me and look past the maroon sweater with the huge R sewn crookedly onto it, you would see a tired heart who's tried so much. I just wasn't rightly cut out to be that kind of guy who could profess his love for a girl.
Hermione and I had an odd sort of relationship. One of those love-hate friendships. But in the end, she was always there for me. And she was the one who tried harder than I did. I had been wondering if she fancied me when her and I set out for our first Hogsmeade trip (without Harry). We walked around the village in silence until she caught a store that she wanted to go into, and I remember she grabbed my hand and pulled me into it. It was the way she held my hand that made me wonder. Her hand enveloped in mine and the way she smiled at me over her shoulder. We were both disappointed that Harry couldn't come, but at the same time just slightly, guiltlessly grateful.
Note to self: don't tell Harry about this.
I had grown so angry with her when she went with this Krum fellow to the Yule Ball. I would insult him to her face every chance I got and even throw a few at her while I was at it. I remember she shot back at me once and I told her I felt like I was wasting my time on her. It wasn't true, I never felt like time with her was wasted... but I was just so, so jealous. Tears filled up her eyes and she ran down the stairs. I remember at that one moment, my heart began to ache as she ran away from me. She was so unattainable, yet so close. She was one of my best friends, and at that very moment... I realized I loved her. In that sort of way.
So I ran after her. I found her at the bottom of the steps, her delicate chin placed on her knees and her arms wrapped around her legs. There were two sparkly tears nestled in her eyes and when she looked up at me with red, bloodshot eyes, she saw me and turned away.
"Go away," her voice was clogged up.
"Hermione," I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. "I'm an idiot, okay? I'm sorry for being so mean... I don't care who you go to the Ball with,"
She didn't answer. I sat down next to her and with a shaking hand, guided her chin so she would face me.
"Do you really not care?" she asked. Her breath was hot and it glided onto my face. I swallowed deeply and tried to keep still.
"I mean, I care about you, of course," I began, "but you're free to date whoever... I'm not your dad,"
She studied me carefully. Her eyes were so round, and so brown... and they just studied my expression. I wondered if this was how she got when she studied those slugs in Potions class. No, I wasn't that ugly. Merlin, let's hope not.
"Hermione?" I finally broke the silence. "Are you okay now?"
She turned away then, and I got up to look at her and saw more tears. I didn't understand it. I didn't know what she was waiting for. I myself, was waiting for her. To let me in. To let me love her. Was she waiting for the same?
"It really hurts, Ron," she whimpered. "I hate when you get so mean cause I really love you,"
My heart was bursting out of its rib cage.
"You're one of my best friends," she continued.
That same heart? It just fell to the floor with an ugly, sloppy plop.
"Right, I love you too," I mumbled. "You me and Harry... we'll always be there for each other, okay?"
"Of course!" there was more life to her voice now. "Then why can't we support each other? Next time you really do have a problem with my dates, just tell me, okay?"
I nodded. "It's just Krum has such a big nose,"
She looked at me and rolled her eyes. I jabbed her playfully and grinned, and she finally laughed. I held out my hand to her and she jumped up and brushed herself off. I was just about to head in the other direction to the boys bathroom when I heard her call behind me.
"Ron?"
I stood there, my back to her, my heart racing and my palms sweaty. "What is it?"
"Was there anything else you wanted to say?"
I whirled around and clenched my slippery fists together and felt blood rush to my head. She stood there, facing me. The empty corridors all around us. Just her and I.
Her and I.
"Good luck trying to fit into the picture with that nose he's got," I finally shot out.
Note to self: Idiot. Stupid, fucking, idiot.
She didn't laugh right away. I suppose she was waiting for something else.
But what?
"Bye, Ron," she finally said and then walked the other direction.
Harry and I finally both looked up at the same time to see Hermione and Malfoy, two bags in their hands. She looked up excitedly at us and waved, the brightest smile on her face.
Note to self: one day, if you ever change your pathetic attitude... tell her she's beautiful.
We both waved back, Harry's smile full of happiness for his best friend who had finally found a good job and a good boyfriend. My smile was full of regret for the one girl I've finally accepted to really, really love... and let go.
This was just like that bloody airport scene, except it was a train station.
Except for one minor little speck. There was no way in all that was magical that I would be able to run after her and profess dying love. I envisioned myself slipping on the icy grounds and plunging headfirst to the ground. Maybe throw in a nosebleed. Both nostrils if I'm lucky. I could hear Malfoy now.
"No, Weasley," I mimicked in his stupid drawl. "There's no money on the ground,"
"Draco!" I continued in a high pitched voice. "Don't be mean!"
"Who are you talking to?" Harry poked me.
"Erm. Nobody,"
"Well, she's gonna come over to us..." Harry began. "She's gonna hug us both, let us know that she'll definitely write and that we'd better not forget to, either,"
I smiled faintly. That sounded exactly like what Hermione would say.
"Then she'll look at you briefly, because I swear, Ron... she knows, and she'll say in a soft voice... goodbye, Ron. Then she'll hug you awkwardly. Then she'll look at me and her voice will return to normal..."
"Shutup," I muttered. This was reminiscent of our whole career at Hogwarts.
"No, no... it's true. Then she'll like... swallow me in this tight hug, then she'll leave. Forever,"
"She won't be gone forever," I snapped at Harry. "New York is only a train ride away,"
"Right. Ron. She's taking the train to the airport. New York is in the States,"
I felt my face burning.
"You're turning the color of your hair again,"
"You know what, Harry. Have I told you lately that I get urges to tranquilize you?"
Harry grinned. "Tell her, mate. Just tell her. Do it for me, so I don't have to watch her be attached to Malfoy,"
"There's nothing to say," I lied. "What am I going to tell her? Hermione, I just wanted to let you know..."
"Let me know what?"