Nan opened the door and went into her room, it was dusty from her prolonged absence but thankfully there were no cobwebs that indicated the presence of spiders. She blew on her desk spreading the dust around then pulling up a chair. She sat down as rays of sunlight streamed through the curtain and danced on her table, tears then began to fall on her cheeks and down onto the table staining it. She thought back to her conversation with Tyson and wondered if that was true? Since Karol's arrival to the Hunting Blade Nan had in been infatuated with him, it was almost love on first sight, and she always thought of him…however Clinton didn't make it easy…he had often teased her on being more like a girl and less like a man and he openly disdained her for it. Therefore she had developed a persona, one that would live up to Clinton's expectations, thus allowing her to thrive under the Hunting Blade's guild; as a result however she couldn't openly confess to Karol about her feelings and would often ignore his feeble attempts to woo her despite her own desire to accept it.
So she was quite surprised when recently Karol's attempt to woo her became less and less until it completely stopped altogether, Nan thought it was just Karol being himself and she thought that it would continue again soon but as the weeks went by there was no further attempts and Nan became to get worried, then finally the truth came out. Nan and Tyson were talking about trivial things when Tyson looked uncomfortable and said, "Look Nan, I know you have feelings for the kid" he said knowing that 'kid' was Karol's nickname, "and don't deny it I know about it. Thank goodness its just me or else Clinton will have a field day with it."
"So what?" Nan asked defiantly surprised that Tyson would know about it and not Karol.
Tyson rubbed the back of his head and looked left and right, "Okay…I promised Karol I wouldn't say anything about this but considering your feelings I thought it would be best if you knew."
"Know about what?"
"Nan…Karol already has another girlfriend."
Those words hit Nan like a bomb…Karol having another girlfriend? That was impossible, Karol had tried again and again to woo her, almost the same day he joined the Hunting Guild, and despite laughter and insults he never gave up. So why was he giving up now? "W-w-what do you mean?"
"He told me, in confidence, that he's given up on you. He's already dating someone else, you know the baker's daughter Alice?" Tyson asked as Nan nodded, "well they're together now and the father is more than happy for Karol to start dating his daughter, in fact he's been given the kid free bread as a reward. People are saying that they really look good together. I'm sorry Nan but I'm afraid you've lost your chance."
Nan was completely speechless at this…she never expected Karol to cozy up to another girl but as she began to think about this she nodded with realisation, Karol didn't want someone who kept rejecting him every step of the way, he wanted someone that would appreciate his efforts and reward him for it, and that wasn't Nan. "Thanks Tyson, I need to go to my room for a while" Nan said softly.
"Nan…" Tyson said reaching out to her but then decided against it as he sat there in stony silence.
Nan simply sat there as memories of Karol began to fill her head and she sobbed in complete despair, she cursed Clinton who had imposed such a harsh rule on her and she cursed Alice for taking Karol's heart but most of all she cursed herself on being such a fool and not taking the chances when it had presented itself to her. She could hear the wind howling and it seemed to her like they were laughing and mocking her, reminding her how foolish she was and what it had costed her, for the rest of the day she was in this state of mind: cursing, crying then cursing again. She didn't know what time it was and neither did she care, she barely touched the food that Tyson gave to her as she had lost her appetite instead playing with it instead and she barely talked to anyone throughout the day. By night fall she had cried herself to sleep, too exhausted to even make it to her bed or to even change…her mind was simply shattered, her heart crushed by despair.
Morning came though without the sunshine, Nan slowly opened her eyes and looked out the window. It was dark and cloudy with a good chance of shower, that was good it seemed to reflect her mood, she finally changed her clothes and went down to the dining hall. It was empty except for the cook, she got her breakfast and started eating it though she barely even tasted it just opting to simply chew her way through the food as she thought about what to do next. She looked outside to see that the rain hadn't come yet…so she decided to take a walk, just a small one before the rain came not that she minded it of course, she went outside to see people setting up stalls, buying food and vegetables and finally the baker…the baker was opening up his shop along with his daughter and for one single moment Nan would've loved to chop her up with her boomerang blade but thought against it. It wouldn't serve any purpose and Karol would just hate her instead of loving her…she quickly walked away from the baker and walked instead on the shores of Darenghest, hoping to clear her mind.
Nan was walking along the shores when she sighed Karol, bent down and collecting seashells, her heart soared thinking that Karol was making it for her but then it was evident who it was for: Alice, the baker's daughter, but it wouldn't hurt to actually ask who it would be for, "Hey there Karol…" she said, "what are you doing?"
Karol looked up at her and there was no emotional reaction, usually he would falling head over heels just meeting her but now…there was only a blank stare, "Oh hey Nan," he said in a monotonous tone, "I'm making a seashell necklace" he then smiled and Nan's heart soared for a bit, "I'm sure Alice would love this. She enjoys the beach so I thought this would be the best present for her."
Nan's heart dropped a little bit more…so it was official, Karol no longer loved her and she was now truly alone, Nan almost cried there and then but decided to turn her back from him, "I see Karol…then I wish you luck." Nan then ran away from him before Karol could ask any more questions, she ran and ran not knowing where she would end up or whom she'll bump into. She just couldn't handle the fact that Karol no longer loved her…that she'll never see him tripping himself trying to woo her…and that she'll never be able to enjoy his company ever again, it was too much for her heart and she just wanted to simply disappear. Finally she tripped herself on a rock and she fell flat on her face, at that moment it began to rain and she could feel herself getting soaked; sobbing she just curled up on the ground and wanted to disappear, never to come back, it was quite a while before she even got the strength to get up from the floor and head back to the guild. She continued to sob the whole way through and everyone ignored her as simply another girl with a broken heart, she looked at the bakery and saw Karol and Alice inside eating, they were talking and laughing out loud, Nan hid and looked on as the two lovebirds seemed happy while Nan was here miserable and in despair.
Then Karol took out the seashell necklace that he was making on the beach and gave it to Alice…Alice looked at it and hugged Karol in thanks before they did the one thing Nan dreaded, they kissed each other…not a deep one but enough to know that Nan had truly lost her chance at love, despondent and without hope she trudged up to her bed. Ignoring Tyson's comment on how wet she was, the other members looked down not wanting to know Nan's problem, she closed the door and locked it before Tyson could barge in and demand to know what happened. The rest of the night she curled up in a dark corner of her room and listened to the rain, it sounded like a sad melody…a melody of her pathetic life and how even more pathetic she is, "I'm worthless…" she muttered to herself, "I'm completely…utterly…worthless" she kept muttering as her mind slowly slipped from reality.
Morning came but Nan didn't even recognise morning anymore, night and day were the same to her fractured mind, she got up from where she had been sitting all night as she kept muttering how worthless and pathetic she was. She found a butcher knife and carefully slid it into her sleeve; she then went to the bakery shop where she carefully picked the lock, a skill that Karol taught her, and went inside. Along the way she hummed a tune that she made up during the night and first went to the baker, who was still asleep, and in one quick motion sliced his throat not even staying as blood spurted from his neck ensuring a quick death. Nan then slowly made her way to Alice's bedroom intending to kill her, along the way memories of Nan and Karol cropped up in her mind however they were all, for some reason or another, blurry and sometimes the memory didn't even match with the environment. She then entered the bedroom and was horrified to find Karol and Alice, in the same bed together, Nan slowly giggled which soon resulted in a full out insane laughter, waking them up, "N-n-nan" Karol said in surprise, "what are you doing here? And wh-what's with the knife?"
"Where's daddy?" Alice asked in fear.
"You'll see daddy really soon~" Nan said in a sing-along voice, her eyes glazed with insanity, "now be a good couple and stay still while I carve your bodies!" then lunging at Karol who managed to dodge it but Nan was much faster and she managed to get a stab into Karol's body, he cried out in pain and tried to escape along with Alice but he tripped and fell down. That gave Nan all the opening she needed, she pounced on Karol and stabbed him numerous times with the knife until he was filled with bloody holes and already dead, his eyes lifeless; Alice screamed but that was put to a stop when Nan slashed her throat wide open blood spurting all over the palce, she slumped to the ground clutching her throat before going limp and falling over to her side. Nan stood silent for a while as her fractured brain tried to piece together what had just happened when she started to giggle before going to full-blown insanity; knights began to file in and upon seeing the carnage they immediately arrested her and put her into prison where she would await trial though many were adamant that she would receive nothing less than the death penalty.
As she awaited trial she continued to laugh in an insane way, so loudly and so much that none except the bravest would even dare offer to stand guard over her. They could hear her muttering and only those with sharp hearing or those brave, or insane, enough to get close to her can hear the words she muttered, "Don't worry Karol…I still love you…from now till death…nothing will get in our way."
