1. It was a Saturday night at 10:30. There was a knock on Rhoda's door. When she opened it, she saw Mary standing there.
But it was a bedraggled Mary! Her clothes and hair were soaked, and she had lost one of her shoes.
"What happened to you, Mary?"
"Oh, Rhoda, I've just been on a date from hell!"
"You look it! Come on in and tell me about it, kiddo."
"Thanks!"
She came in. Rhoda got a towel for her, and also a cup of coffee. They sat on the couch together.
"OK, tell me all about it, Mary."
She sighed and began her story:
2.
Mary and her date went to the Vineyard, a restaurant in downtown Minneapolis. They ordered drinks. When they come, he made a toast:
"To the prettiest lady in the restaurant."
She smiled. "Thank you, Leonard."
They drank.
"She's sitting over there," he said afterward. Mary glared at him. He smiled. "Just kidding!"
The menu came.
"I want you to know that you can order anything you want from this restaurant."
"OK."
"As long as it is less than $10!"
Only two of the main courses fit this requirement! Again, she glared at him.
"April Fool!"
"But it's July!"
"OK, I'm a little late!"
She groaned!
She ended up ordering spaghetti-one of the cheaper items on the menu-and he ordered crab legs-one of the more expensive things! He also ordered three drinks, which he drank rather quickly.
"Uh, Leonard, will you be OK to drive?"
"Don't worry, babe! It takes a lot more booze to get me drunk-HIC!"
Again, Mary groaned!
Such was how the rest of the evening went. The more he drank, the more obnoxious he became. When the bill came, Mary was very glad that they were leaving!
Near the car, there was a public fountain. It was circular, and had an upper level that dropped water down.
"Mary, there's something I've always wanted to do."
"What's that?"
"Play in a fountain! Come on, It'll be fun!"
"Uh, no, Leonard!"
He grabbed her and took her into the fountain with him! Then he took her to the area where the water was falling down, getting the two of them soaked!
"Hey, this is fun, isn't it!"
"Leonard, I paid $40 for this dress!"
"Ah, it's just water!"
A policeman came by. Seeing them, he said, "Get out of the fountain, you two! I can charge you a $25 fine for swimming in it!"
"Mary got out. "This man dragged me in! I'd like to have him arrested, officer!"
3.
"What happened then?," asked Rhoda.
"He took us to police headquarters. They threatened to charge Leonard with assault, but I agreed to drop the charge if he agreed to never call me again. However, they're holding him for the night on public drunkenness."
"So how'd you get home?"
"That officer drove me."
"Mary, I've been on many bad dates, but that one takes the cake!"
"Yeah! I just hope he keeps his word and never bothers me again!"
"Let's hope so! By the way, what happened to your right shoe?"
"It came off in the water. I couldn't find it right away, so I gave up."
"I see. Another war victim!"
"Yep!"