AN: Nothing is mine. I know, I have stories to update. It's been way to long but I can't seem to get anything typed out when I try. I think the muse has fled. This little story is silly and not very good. But it's the first time I've gotten anything typed out and finished in several months. I started a few one shots but deleted them as too stupid or I couldn't complete them.
I'm Ranger Manoso and I've finally admitted that I'm in love with one Stephanie Plum. Yes, I'm sure that you all have realized this but for me to admit it, well it's a big deal. I love this woman with all my heart and with my entire soul. No one can ever imagine the depth of my love for her.
Today is one of those silly days that Stephanie loves so much – National Oreo Cookie Day. Those cookies are full of fat and sugar. Not one bit of nutritional value but I digress. Stephanie and the girls at the bonds office will be overjoyed by this "holiday" and they will probably eat copious amounts of these cookies.
In order to show Stephanie I can enjoy this type of "holiday" while not eating them, I wouldn't want to raise my blood sugar; I'm going to stop by with some cookies. I had Ella pick some up, who knew there were so many flavors, plus I found some facts to impress her. Okay, I'll probably sound like an idiot but she likes it when I do things like this. Maybe she'll see me as a man and not a superhero.
I grabbed the paper bag so the men wouldn't see what was in it and carried it down to my Cayenne. I placed the bag on the floor of the backseat when Lester came up behind me, "Whatcha doin Boss?"
I just looked at him with one eyebrow crooked up. I learned long ago that this made people nervous and they would babble or say something they didn't mean to. It worked on Steph all the time. Les fidgeted and said, "Well have fun then with whatever it is you're doing."
I climbed in and motored over to the bond's office. I thought about all the times I pushed her away. I knew it was time to put up or shut up so to speak. I needed to make my move, Morelli was out of the picture and I wasn't about to let him worm his way back in. I parked in front of the office, grabbed the bag and purposefully made my way in. As I walked in I heard Lula talking about today's "holiday" and the need to get some oreo's to make her day better. I watched my Babe put her hand to the back of her neck. She always did that when I was near her.
"Ranger, what are you doing here," she inquired, knowing I had no files as I rarely did any bounty hunting anymore.
"I have a present for you ladies. It's National Oreo Cookie Day and it's the 105th birthday of the Oreo," I replied. They all gasped in surprise and Lula lunged for the paper bag. I pulled it away, handing it to my Babe. She peered inside and graced me with a heart melting smile of pure joy.
"I can't believe you know that Ranger. Have you ever eaten an Oreo?" she asked.
"Babe, I had them when I was a kid," I blandly stated. She began pulling packages out of the bag. Ella picked up several flavors Chocolate Mint Crème, Golden, Triple Double Chocolate, Berry, Birthday Cake and Lemon. "Did you know that Lemon was first introduced in 1920 but discontinued in 1924? I don't know when they came back."
Lula and Connie just stared at me, like I had lobsters crawling from my ears. Babe gave me a mischievous grin, "Any other Oreo facts you know about?"
"As a matter of fact, I do. Most people think Hydrox came out after the Oreo but it's actually the other way around. Hydrox came out in 1908. There were two other varieties of biscuits that came out with the Oreo but they weren't as successful. They were introduced by the National Biscuit Company. Another interesting fact is that Oreo's are thought to be as addictive as cocaine based on a 2013 study. In fact it was noted that the high fat and sugar stimulated the pleasure centers of the rats' brains more so than cocaine or morphine. One student also observed that the rats 'would break [the Oreos] open and eat the middle first.' You may want to think about that before eating those," I explained.
Again the staring but this time Steph did as well, her mouth hanging open and a cookie half way to her mouth. Lula had cookies spilling out of her mouth. Steph managed to get ahold of herself and said, "Wow Batman, who knew you had so much info on Oreos hiding in your brain." I noticed she put the cookie package down and dropped the cookie that was in her hand in the trash as she opened the door, "I'm out of here girls, I think I'm gonna go home with Ranger instead of eating those cookies. I think that Batman's naked body can be just as addictive as cocaine and it's much better for you too."
I grinned at her and replied, "Sounds good to me Babe."