Dear Padmé,
Life has been so difficult since you left. Nobody understands me like you did. Nobody understands my needs the way you did, and nobody KNOWS HOW MUCH THAT IRRITATES ME, when I try to make myself understood and still fail because people are so DENSE, they can be so kriffing stupid it boggles the mind that they are still classified as sentients.
NOBODY understands how hard I try! The Boss doesn't understand - he just sits in that fracking overstuffed couch of his all day and mutters to himself and talks funny, and sometimes I swear I think he's talking backwards, but I've never been able to confirm this because every time I've tried to listen HARDER (and I always listen hard, you know I do) he kriffing starts cackling to himself; and then it always goes downhill from there, because the minute he starts cackling it sets off this horrid HORRID static effect in the sonic receptors attached to my helmet which really irritates me badly because the karking sound of static reminds me of TATOOINE SAND, which is itchy and scratchy and gets into all the wrong crevices, and there wasn't ever very much water to start with on Tatooine; you have to be a fracking moisture farmer to even be able to afford regular baths - and it brings back the memories, and then I start thinking about the time I first met you and you were so pretty and your dress was ridiculous but that didn't matter because I wasn't staring very much at your dress anyway... not that part of it at least, and then I keep seeing HIM, that kriffing Jedi bastard - THAT OBI-WAN!
He stole you from ME, Padmé! You and I were going to go away together and be happy together in our own little world where the galaxy could have gone to hell in a fracking handbasket for all I cared but it would have been you and me and we would have been kriffing happy, because I only EVER wanted to make you happy; and that BASTARD had to go kark it all up, and, and, and, I CANNOT LET HIM GO DO YOU UNDERSTAND HE TOOK AWAY THE ONLY HAPPINESS I HAD and now you're gone, and the kid is gone, and my kriffing LIMBS are GONE TOO; and - and - and this is the BIG THING - my hair, my lovely hair is also GONE, and it is all OBI-WAN'S FAULT.
FORCE I HATE THE MAN SO MUCH I WOULD DO ANYTHING TO HAVE HIM DEAD
Dear sweet Padmé, I want you to be happy where you are. I don't know if you can read this but every night - well, almost every night... ok, maybe every other weekend, but you know it's not because I don't have time for you, you know it's because this kriffing job, it's so Important, and, and, I have Plans, Padmé - plans for the galaxy, you always wanted a united galaxy, right? I'm making your dreams come true, Padmé; and that's why I'm so stressed and irritable, I just have to get this right so you can be happy where you are.
I'm doing it all for you, Padmé.