I Hate That I Love You
Okay, so once again I want to remind readers that I can't promise updates. I've been pretty busy lately – I'm surprised I'm even writing this. But for some reason the story beckoned me.
In The Vampire Diaries, hate and love are both common themes. They're also intertwined between some of the characters, the most glaring characters being Delena. But I wanted to explore all the different relationships in this story, so I think I'm going to do one-shots of all characters with the theme "I hate that I love you."
Let me know what you think!
(Also, it follows no particular pattern – some characters might be written in the first or third person, depending on how I feel it would work. Once again I can't promise regular updates or even updates at all, but I will do my best)
xXx
"I hate that I loved you."
That's what he'd said to her. She had been standing in this room, after she had told him that she had chosen Stefan. He said the words with such malice, such venom, that Katherine had to remind herself that this wasn't the Damon she had once known.
These words, at the time, hadn't bothered her. She was Katherine Pierce, for God's sake! But now they splintered in her heart as if she'd been staked.
She could recall the moment she had started falling for Damon: it was when exact moment he had turned down. She had been offering Damon sex, offering him a simple one night stand. In her head though, Katherine knew it wouldn't be that; she would once again get into Damon's head, destroy him from the inside. But then, it was all just a game.
The old Damon would have jumped her the very second she wandered in the room; but the new Damon threw her away like rubbish.
She was surprised at how much it affected her.
She didn't know how it started, but slowly she began to notice Damon. Okay, he wasn't as kind or as gentle as Stefan, but that was what she liked about him; he was exciting, unpredictable. He was also like her: he had flaws, obvious ones. But at least he wasn't perfect, like Stefan; at least she didn't have to pretend she was perfect too.
Katherine began to notice him when he walked into the room; her heart leapt every time he looked her way. He never smiled at her, though Katherine found herself dreaming about it.
She didn't know how it happened, but somehow she found herself wishing she had chosen differently.
xXx
The first thing he smells is the alcohol. This is a change: it's normally him who is drinking scotch like it's going out of fashion. He enters, wondering who has decided to break into his private stash of drinks.
Of course. He should have guessed. Katherine is sitting on the leather chair, an Aladdin's cave worth of drinks surrounding her. Loosely her arm flails in the air, hovering over the drinks.
"The 1930s called," Damon says. He leans against the threshold of the door. "It wants its alcohol back."
She rolls her eyes at him, like a horse gone lame. "You're so funny, Damon. You're so funny it kills me!" She makes a sweeping gesture, spilling bits of her drink as she goes.
He flops down beside her. "Why the sudden urge to drink yourself to death? That's my job."
She looks at him, feeling suddenly sober. "You ask as if you care."
Damon blinks.
"What?" she asks. "You can't monopolise all the pity. Throw your own pity party!"
Damon stares at her. The teasing expression has gone from his face; now he's just bemused. "You're not making any sense," he says. She knows what he's thinking: since when did she feel sorry for herself?
"You don't care," she says – whimpers. To her horror she feels as if she's going to cry – something she hasn't done in years. "I do. I care, Damon. But you don't..."
Suddenly she screams, hurling the glass against the wall. Damon recoils. The look on his face tells he that this is the first time he has been truly surprised in years.
"I hate you," she snarls. "I hate that you – you've made me feel, and I mean really feel, after all these years! It's not fair!" She blinks back tears – of what? Of fear, or sadness, or rage? She doesn't want to cry in front of Damon. She doesn't want to cry at all. But for the first time in years she is coming back – becoming that sweet girl that used to feel. And it hurts.
"What are you talking about?" Damon is still confused.
She stands, leaning in close to him. Her breath, warm and reeking of alcohol, lands on his skin. "I hate that I love you," she hisses.
Stunned – honestly, truly shocked – Damon watches as she walks up towards the stairs, taking the bottle as she goes.
Katherine figured it out though, she did; she knew why she had fallen for Damon. It was her punishment for making Damon fall for her, and then breaking his heart. Now she had lost her heart to Damon, who would never love her in return, simply because she had hurt him too badly before. And because he loved Elena.
Fucking karma.