The Truth About Humans
A Farscape fan fiction for the SACC contest… standard disclaimer removed to protect the identity of the author! (If you want to read the disclaimer that badly, it'll be added on after the voting is done).
Blanket disclaimer and notes: The characters don't belong to the author of this story. The author isn't that creative. Oh, the planet Earth doesn't belong to the author either, but if the author gets his or her way, it would… *insert evil villain laugh here*. This takes place after 'A Clockwork Nebari'. Spoilers for stuff that takes place in that episode and the episodes before. Rating is a PG. Now, on with the story!
~~~
John Crichton stood alone on the terrace. It was late, nearing what passed for early morning aboard Moya. He'd been on duty, watching the Command with Aeryn for any signs of trouble when he'd decided to step out for a breath of air.
For the past few weekans, Moya had had relative peace on board. It seemed miraculous after the amount of trouble they'd had recently. The whole crew was still recovering from their experience with the Nebari who'd tried to take Chiana and mind-cleanse the remainder of the crew had suffered. That particular encounter had left them all shaken and quiet.
The road of this recovery had been rocky, but worse of all for John and Chiana. She had become restless, now that she knew her brother Nerri was alive and well. Only John had been able to keep her from taking a transport pod and trying to find her way to her brother's side. And John had questions of his own rattling around in his head. Most of them had to deal with Scorpius, who his thoughts turned to more and more often.
He came to a realization with a start, dragging him out of his reverie. There was something about the stars tonight that seemed familiar. At first, he dismissed it as wishful thinking. They'd been through so many systems in the past two cycles that most of them had begun to look the same.
But the feeling persisted. He turned from the terrace, re-entering the Command. Aeryn was still there, seated at one of the consoles. Her head was rested on her forearms, and she was watching the view screen quietly. Aeryn hadn't been assigned to duty. She'd shown up, a few arns after John's shift had begun.
~
"Hey," he'd greeted, looking up as she'd entered. She was dressed in a sleeveless grey shirt and another pair of his underwear. He didn't really mind; it amused him. For all of her protestations and complaints, she still liked him enough to snerch his clothing.
"Hey," she'd responded.
"What are you doing up? You're not on duty for arns yet."
"I couldn't sleep. The drugs, they must have had some side effect on me. It's taking its time to wear off." Aeryn sat at one of the consoles.
John looked at her. She looked worn out, but it showed worse in the eyes. They were reddened, and dark circles had begun to form. He nodded, and she stared at the view screen. John went back to the paper he'd been doodling on, and they sat in silence for nearly an arn. He'd then gotten up, and asked her to watch Command for her for a few microts, and then went out on the terrace.
~
When he returned, Aeryn hadn't moved from her position. She looked up briefly as he entered, and then went back to what she'd been doing.
"Pilot," John asked. "Where are we?"
"We are in an abandoned system, Commander. Moya says that she detects no advanced life forms or technology in the area."
"Do we have any charts for this system, Pilot?"
Aeryn sat up and looked at him curiously. "What are you doing, John? Is there trouble?"
He glanced at her. "No, but there's something familiar about this place. Pilot?"
"Yes. They are available on the console where Officer Sun is seated."
"Thanks, Pilot," John said, and walked over to the console. Aeryn sat up, and began punching keys and buttons. Soon they'd found the holographic maps and brought them up. They displayed a small-scale model of the system. Nine planets. Nine familiar looking planets.
John looked at the map in shock. Aeryn glanced at his face for a microt, then did a double take. The expression on his face stunned and scared Aeryn at the same time. "John? Crichton! What is it?"
"Aeryn, is there any information files on this system? Like, a summary of the planets or something?"
Aeryn punched a few more buttons. After a few microts, some text appeared, and Aeryn began to read. "System AZ-3678M. Contains nine planetary masses and one asteroid field concentrated around one small star. Planets AZ-3678Ma, b, and e through i are uninhabited by any complex life forms and are uninhabitable by Sebacean life forms. Planet AZ-3678Md, now uninhabitable, was the site of a Peacekeeper experiment base that was the base of operations for Operation COL2335. Planet AZ-3678Md failed as a base and was later abandoned in favor of Planet AZ-3678Mc, which was found to have a more hospitable climate. The base on AZ-3678Mc was later destroyed by causes unknown and abandoned. Several of the base personnel stayed on the base, refusing to leave. Their fate is… unknown."
A strange, roiling feeling grew steadily in John's gut as Aeryn quickly read the summary. Nine planets. An asteroid belt. "Aeryn," he asked in a strangled voice, "Are there any maps specifically of AZ-3678Mc? Anything at all?"
"Yes. There's one image of the that planet, taken from a Command Carrier." Aeryn brought it up.
John let out a gasp and sat down hard next to Aeryn. She looked at him, worried and uncomprehending. Then she looked at the planet again, and a look of understanding grew on her face. "John, is that…"
"Yes, Aeryn," he said, finding his voice surprisingly calm. John felt numb all over. "That's Earth."
~
Aeryn looked at him.
"But how is that possible? It's in Moya's database; it's in her frelling database. We should have known, and I, I searched her files, didn't I? I know I did. Why didn't I find it?"
"John, you searched for Earth. Earth isn't in the files. AZ-3678Mc is. You couldn't possibly have known to search for that," she reasoned.
"Earth. Peacekeepers were on Earth," He said numbly. He felt like he was thousands of feet underwater, that if he tried to move, he'd be crushed. He was afraid that it wasn't real. "Aeryn," he said, suddenly. "Pinch me. I think I'm dreaming."
"What? Why would I pinch you? You're not dreaming, I can tell you that," she said.
"Um, nothing. Earth saying. Oh my God, oh my God," he gasped suddenly, his eyes going wide. His paralysis was broken, and he stood up. A microt later he sat again. "Aeryn… it… whoa. Whoa."
Aeryn's alarm increased. "It whoa what?" she asked, grabbing his arm and forcing him to look at her.
"Aeryn, did you ever wonder if the incredible similarities in Human and Sebacean physiology was more than just coincidence?"
"No, I'm not a scientist."
"Aeryn, come on. You had to have thought it just once. You yourself thought I was a Sebacean when we first met. Everyone we meet thinks I'm Sebacean. And the differences… what? The heat gland thing, your paraphoral nerve? Small stuff like that?"
"Yes, what about them?" Aeryn asked, nonplussed.
"Aeryn, Humans are Sebaceans. Jesus. Jesus. It explains so much… the missing link… oh God," he stopped, seeing the look on Aeryn's face, and then began to explain it. "On Earth, there's a theory about life, called the evolutionary theory. It explains how Humans came about, by the weaker species dying out and the stronger ones surviving. One of the major problems with it is that there was a link missing between Humans and our ancestors. It's known as the missing link. There's no evidence of its existence, no proof or anything. Because there is no missing link. Look at the summary again. Sebaceans colonized Earth thousands of years ago. But something happened, and they abandoned the colony, but someone stayed behind. My ancestors."
"Crichton," Aeryn began, looking annoyed. "Don't be frelling ridiculous. There's no way that Humans and Sebaceans are the same thing. You don't even have the level of technology of the most primitive Sebacean culture."
"Aeryn, the base was destroyed, along with the technology. It was lost, almost all of it, and the people who lost it probably couldn't salvage it, and learned to live off the land. Look at the similarities, they're undeniable."
"But your sciences, they're so primitive! You can't see nearly so well as a Sebacean, and you don't even live half as long," she pointed out.
"I know, Aeryn. But species evolve. There are parts of Earth where no Sebaceans could have lived, where it's too hot. Maybe Humans developed bodily temperature controls to deal with it. Maybe our eyes weakened over time. I don't know, but it has to be. There's no time frame given on the summary. It could have been thousands or tens of thousands of years ago… Sebaceans probably caused the extinction of the groups who would have later become the real Humans… And after all that time, the histories would be lost and distorted. There's always been tales of gods coming from the sky, in so many mythologies and religions. And then, there's the whole compatibility thing…"
"John!" she gasped, sitting bolt upright. Her face colored, and she looked behind her, a sudden irrational fear that the entire crew would be standing behind them. Her fear was, of course, unfounded, and she glared at him. "If you've told anyone-"
He cut her off, rolling his eyes. "Come on, Aeryn. I'm not stupid or that insensitive. I didn't tell anyone and I'm not planning to."
Aeryn softened, and looked at him. The arguments he made were true. Could it be possible? Were Humans and Sebaceans really the same thing, barring the minor differences? The test they'd taken only reinforced the theory.
"Humans and Sebaceans… the same," she said in a voice so low it was nearly a whisper.
John's eyes sparked mischievously, and he said in a light voice, "Well, I guess you can't make any more jokes about how primitive I am." He grinned.
"But what about the lifespan? You said that Humans only live for about eighty cycles."
John leaned back in his chair and nodded slowly. "I know. On Earth they do. Hardly anyone lives past one hundred, and most never even make it to eighty. But in space… no Human's ever lived in space for longer than a few months at a time, and then in extreme conditions," he said, thinking about Mir. No one had been able to live there for more than five or six months. "But the only time Humans have spent in space has been in cramped shuttles with zero gravity. Moya's got full gravity. In fact, by now, I should have had some major health problems. My heart should be in really bad shape. I've never even stopped to really consider it, but I should be moving like an old man," he conceded.
"Peacekeepers spend nearly their entire lives in space. That's got to have done something for the lifespan. Do Sebaceans who spend their entire lives on a planet live as long as a Peacekeeper does?" he asked.
"I… I don't know. I've never spent more than a few monens at a time on any single planet. Peacekeeper training is very strict. We rarely had contact with anyone who wasn't a fellow Peacekeeper, even when we were young," Aeryn answered.
"So, it could be different," John said.
"We're not even sure if that's Earth, John," Aeryn said.
"You're right. That's why we're going to find out. Pilot! Can you take us to the third planet from the sun? It's on the charts as AZ-3678Mc," he called.
"Certainly, Commander. Moya will be there in approximately three solar days."
John whooped in joy and leaped from his seat, dragging Aeryn up with him. He danced around the Command, pulling a very surprised and embarrassed Aeryn with him. However, for all her protestations, she didn't break away, and was soon smiling and laughing with him.
~
Arns later, John had awaked the remainder of Moya's crew. Aeryn had changed and was now dressed in her usual black leather. They were gathered on Command, as he and Aeryn showed them the map and explained their theory. After they were finished, a commotion broke out.
"No, no, no!" Rygel shouted. "We are not going to that planet! You saw what happened the last time we were there!"
"Calm down, Sparky," John said. "That wasn't Earth. That was something the Ancients conjured up. It wasn't real."
"I don't care, I am not going to be dissected!"
"I hate to say it, but I agree with Rygel," D'Argo spoke up. "If the indication of the false Earth turns out to be true, we could all be dead."
"D'Argo," John said wearily, "I'm not one hundred percent sure it's even Earth. I think it is. I just want to make sure. Besides, the technology on Earth would never be able to detect Moya, let alone figure out what she is."
Zhaan nodded. "I have to agree. We should at least ascertain whether or not it is Earth."
"Yeah, checking it out won't hurt, right?" Chiana added. "We should at least find out if it's real. I mean, I'd want to go home, too."
At that, Aeryn looked at Chiana. A strange expression came across her face, then disappeared. But John caught the look before it faded. He was surprised at what he saw in Aeryn's face – dismay? Was she actually concerned about losing him?
"So, then, it's settled," Zhaan said. "We will go to this planet, and find out if it is your Earth, John."
"Thank you, Zhaan," he said, smiling. Behind him, he heard Rygel muttering to himself.
The crew stood to leave as the meeting broke. Chiana came to John, giving him a large hug that surprised him and nearly knocked him off his feet. "Whoa, Chi, easy there," he said, extricating himself from her hug.
"I'm just happy for you, is all," she said, grinning. "You get to go home."
Aeryn was still standing at a console, preparing to do her shift of watching Command. As the others left, John paused for a moment, watching her back. He turned to leave, when she called his name softly. "John."
He turned back to her again. "Yeah, what is it Aeryn?"
"You know it's Earth, don't you?"
"I don't know for sure…" he began, picking his words carefully.
"But you do. You've seen the map and the image of the planet. You're going to go home, aren't you?"
"Aeryn… the planet is still over two days away. I don't know for sure. It may just be a fluke."
"But if it's Earth, you're going to go home," she stated. She still hadn't turned to look at him.
"I don't know," he answered truthfully. "Maybe. Maybe not."
Aeryn didn't speak again. After another microt, John turned and left Command, feeling stupid and ineffectual.
~
This was something he hadn't considered. If it were Earth, would he go home? He'd been on Moya for the past two cycles. Everyone on Earth probably thought he was dead. They'd long ago stopped searching for Farscape 1, he knew that for sure. He wanted to go home, but he also didn't want to leave Moya. John had seen more things in an average month aboard the ship than any other Human could hope to see in his or her lifetime. Did he want to give that up?
But then there was his dad, DK, and his sisters. They were probably still grieving for him. And when he thought of what they probably thought of him at IASA… Jack Crichton's kid, the one who'd failed miserably. That's probably what they all said. He wanted desperately to correct that idea, but it would come at such a cost. He'd learned that after his experience with the Ancients.
He could never go back to being the John Crichton he'd been two cycles ago. IASA wouldn't let him, even if he could leave everything he'd seen and done and experienced in the Uncharted Territories behind him. And he feared something else, as well. Scorpius was still hunting him. Somehow, he'd been successful at finding him… and John wasn't sure that he wanted to lead Scorpius to Earth.
Aeryn. That would be a problem, he knew. He had a feeling that wild horses couldn't even drag an admission out of her, but by the way she'd reacted at Chiana's comment, he knew that Aeryn wouldn't want him to leave. And John wasn't sure that he'd want to leave her…
And then what about the rest of the crew of Moya? IASA would definitely want to know about that… How was he going to be able to explain where he'd been for the past two cycles? Hey guys, I got shot through a wormhole, met a couple of crazy aliens who I shacked up with until we found Earth? Yeah, right. They'd stick him in the loony bin faster than he could say 'Starburst'.
But his family…
John stared at his hands, torn. "What am I gonna do," he asked no one in particular. "What the frell am I going to do?"
~
Two solar days passed as John wrestled with his new problem. Each passing arn gave him further proof that they were in his solar system. They spotted planets he knew all to well, and what little doubt he had was diminishing every microt. He was almost home. He was going back to Earth.
The others, for the most part, seemed unimpressed with his solar system. Chiana seemed to be the most curious, and Rygel dismissed it as being boring. Aeryn had been avoiding him.
As he was eating in the galley midway through the second day, Pilot called for him.
"Commander Crichton. Moya has come within viewing range of planet AZ-3678Mc. Would you like to see it?"
Crichton grew nervous and excited at the same moment. He dropped the food cube and stood. "Yeah, Pilot, I'm on my way to Command. Can you summon the others?"
"Certainly."
~
"Yup, it's Earth alright," he said.
"Like I said, boring," Rygel snorted.
Chiana slapped him on the back of the head. "Watch it, Toad. Or we might just send them a royal Hynerian present. You."
He gasped self-importantly and glared at Chiana. "You wouldn't dare! Do not insult me, you young whelp! I am…"
"Yeah, yeah, we know, dominar, 600 billion subjects, blah, blah, blah," John finished for him.
"What do you plan to do, John?" Zhaan asked him. She was worried about him. He'd been quieter than usual, and for all her efforts, she couldn't get him to talk about this new situation.
"I don't know," he said.
"Well, we'll be within range within eight arns," Aeryn said. "I suggest you make up your mind. Are you going, or staying?"
John shrugged. "I don't know, Aeryn," he said again. "You'll all know as soon as I do."
With that, he turned and left Command.
~
Night. Or at least, what passed as night on Moya. John found Aeryn on the terrace, looking out at the small blue sphere he called home. The lights on the terrace were dimmer than usual, and the entire ship was quiet.
"Aeryn," he greeted.
"Crichton," she responded in a flat tone.
Uh-oh. Not good. Aeryn had gotten to the point where she was calling John by his first name more and more often. She now only called him Crichton when she was upset or annoyed.
He looked at her back. She was standing rigid, her stance like that of a military officer. Her hair was down, and she was holding her head high. She didn't turn to face him.
"I'm going down tomorrow," he said.
She was silent for a microt, then drew a breath. "Go then. You've got what you've been wanting for the past two cycles. You're home. Enjoy it." Her voice was cold and impersonal, but John could detect an off note under the coolness.
He stepped up behind her, taking her arm and forcing her to face him. "Aeryn, I'm coming back. I'm not staying."
Aeryn blinked at him in surprise. Had she heard him right? "What do you mean you're coming back? Don't you want to go home, take up your life?"
"I've been thinking, Aeryn. Long and hard. About what's gonna happen if I go home and stay home. They're gonna want to know where I've been. And if I tell them the truth, they're going to think I'm nuts. If I lie… well, I can't even come up with a lie to explain it that would ever work. And Earth… it's never going to be the same for me. Not after what I've seen. I guess what they say is true, you really never can go home again."
He paused, drawing a breath. "Moya, Pilot, D'Argo, Zhaan, Chiana, hell, even Rygel… they're home now. They're family. And you are, too, Aeryn. As much as you try to deny it sometimes, you're one of us. And I don't think you want me to leave."
"Crichton," she began. Her tone was sharp and annoyed.
"My name is John, Aeryn. Call me John. Do you think making this decision was easy? I'm leaving people I've known my whole life. People I was torn from without even the chance to let them know I'm still alive. This time, I'm choosing to do it. You, of all of the people on Moya, should know how that feels."
Her face flared in anger for a moment, and then it faded. "You're… you're right. I… apologize." She looked away from him, her body sagging.
John was surprised, but he held his tongue. Miss Aeryn Sun, big bad warrior, apologizing? Stop the presses, he thought. Wait, she'd said he was right. About her not wanting him to leave? Or about her knowing how it feels? "I am?" he asked. "About you knowing how it feels, or wanting me to leave?" He couldn't resist asking.
"Yes. Both. I…"
Before Aeryn could speak another word, John had pulled her into a hug. She resisted at first, then relaxed into him. He placed a kiss on her head, and then said, "Thank you."
"For what?" she asked, as he released her.
"Everything. For being here. For not killing me the first time we met. For not ripping my head off every time after," he added, with a grin.
Aeryn smiled back.
"But I am still going down tomorrow. And I'll need your help."
~
John pulled the recorder close to his mouth. The wheels of the tape inside turned slowly, ready to record his words. "Hi, Dad, it's me, John. Now, wait, because, if I know you, right now you're reaching to turn the stereo off. You think this is some prank someone's pulling, because John died two cyc- years ago when Farscape 1 disappeared. But it's really me. I'll prove it."
"When I was ten, you missed my birthday. I was so angry at you I didn't talk to you for three days. When I was in little league, and I was eleven, I broke my arm. I remember you in the hospital, when you came to visit me after they set the bone. You brought me vanilla ice cream and helped me eat it. I was afraid to move because I thought I was going to hurt my arm more. I almost proposed to Alex. I told both you and DK about that. But I only told you the details… about how she told me that she was taking the grant out on the West Coast."
"You, me, and DK, we spent the my last Thanksgiving together. We tried to make the turkey, and we almost burned it. DK toasted us and to the success of the Farscape project. You, me, and DK, Dad, we were the only ones there. And, when I went up on my mission, you gave me your puzzle ring. You said it would bring me luck."
"I'm not dead, Dad. I've had some amazing stuff happen in the past two years. I have seen some stuff you wouldn't believe. But that's on these tapes I've sent to you. I'll get to those later. I'm alive, Dad, and I would have loved to come back to Earth and stay, but there's too much stuff happening, and I would only put you, myself, and Moya's crew in trouble. Oh, Moya, she's this ship… well, I get to it on the other tapes."
"I miss you guys so much, Dad. I got sent through this wormhole, right into a Star Wars movie… it's been just… amazing. I found Earth again by this ironic twist of fate. I was here, again, Dad, but only for a few ar- hours. I had to mail this to you. I've been keeping tapes the whole time I've been here, just in case I ever got home again. And, I promise, Dad, I am gonna come home to stay one day. I just can't do it now. I love you, Dad. Give my love to the girls and DK, too."
He clicked the stop button, and pulled the tape out. He wrapped it in a scrap of paper that read 'Play me first!' in large letters, and placed it with the other tapes in a small box he'd found.
John rubbed his eyes, and looked down at the small collection. He hoped that his father wouldn't throw them away; that he'd be convinced that it really was his son. Just then, Aeryn entered his quarters.
"Are you ready?" she asked.
"Yeah, just finished." He stood and begun to gather his tapes. He was dressed in the most inconspicuous thing he could find – a plain grey shirt and his old khaki pants. He'd never get anywhere if he landed on Earth wearing Peacekeeper leathers. "Oh, wait, just a minute. How could I forget…"
John began digging through his meager belongings, and a moment later, uttered a triumphant laugh, waving a small leather square in the air.
"What's that?" Aeryn asked.
"My wallet. This has all my ID in it. And," he added, "my ATM card. I'm going to need to get money. I only hope no one closed my bank account." After a few weekans on Moya, John had stopped carrying his wallet. American identification wasn't going to do him any good in the Uncharted Territories – worse, it could get him in trouble. And after that run-in with a pickpocket on a commerce planet… It was just wiser not to carry the wallet.
He tucked the wallet into his pants, grabbed his tapes, and joined Aeryn on her way to the docking bay.
~
After some deliberation, they'd picked an area along I-95 in Florida. John had immediately gravitated towards that state, since he'd spent the past few years of his life on Earth there. He'd be more familiar with his surroundings, and would be able to finish faster. They'd picked carefully, looking for an area that would be deserted, but close enough to a major road. The spot they'd picked should be perfect – an uninhabited island on the Keys.
"The what?" Aeryn had asked.
"The Keys. They're a chain of islands off the tip of one of the states in the country I lived in. It should provide some cover, since hardly anyone actually lives on most of them," he'd explained. "The good thing is, there's a major road that runs nearby. That's where we're going to land."
~
Moya was orbiting in the shadow of the moon when they left, trying to stay undetected. They'd taken Aeryn's Prowler, although she'd protested at first. After a few microts, John had managed to convince her. The Prowler was faster and less detectable than Farscape 1 or any transport pod they had aboard.
John was seated behind Aeryn in the small, cramped ship, her hair in a ponytail. Whenever she turned her head, he got whapped in the face by a sheaf of thick black hair. Not that he really minded; he hadn't been this close to her for this long in a very long time. In fact, he was sort of enjoying it.
"Pilot, we're on our way. We should be arriving in several arns," Aeryn spoke into her comm. "I'm cutting communication now, in case anyone might be monitoring."
"It's not as though they'd be able to understand you, anyway," John remarked. "Still, better safe than sorry."
"Right," she agreed tensely. Even though she knew better, Aeryn still feared that Crichton was going to change his mind as soon as they'd arrived. She tried not to let the worry show, and instead affected her best Peacekeeper neutral attitude. But still, the fear lingered…
John sensed Aeryn's mood instinctively. Whoa, back off there, John, he thought. What'd I do to upset her now? Is it the whole Earth thing?
"Aeryn, is there something wrong?" he asked.
"I'm fine, Crichton," she responded.
The rest of the trip was made in silence.
~
They arrived, as planned, under the cover of darkness. The area was dark, draped in velvet shadows, as Aeryn found a copse of trees in which to land. As the Prowler settled down, Aeryn quickly began shutting off the systems, before anyone in the area could possibly discover them.
She popped the hatch, and the warm, humid Florida air poured in. John grinned, breathing in the air. "Mmm, just like I remember it," he smiled.
"Hezmana, Crichton," Aeryn said. "It feels like a sauna here." She pulled at her jacket collar.
"It's not gonna cause Heat Delirium, is it?" He asked, suddenly concerned. He hadn't even considered Aeryn's vulnerability to heat, and now felt guilty.
"No. It's hot, but not hot enough to be a danger."
"Good," he said, relief washing over him. He extricated himself from the cockpit and jumped out of her Prowler, stretching and yawning widely. He looked in surprise when she joined him.
"Aeryn, what are you doing?" he asked.
"Coming with you, of course," she stated in a no-nonsense voice.
"No, no, no. Uh-uh, Aeryn. I am doing this alone. I can get it done faster, and I'll arouse less suspicion if I don't have a woman with me who speaks Sebacean," he said.
She glared at him for a moment, the fear rising again. She almost protested, and then said, "Fine. Have it your way." She turned back to the ship, pulling his bag of things out and tossing it to him.
"Aeryn, I… wait, huh?" he asked. He'd expected a much stronger argument than that. "You're sure?"
"You want to go it alone; so be it. You've got one solar day to get everything done. I'll be here again in one solar day. Don't make me wait," she added. She climbed back into the cockpit. "I've got to get going; the sun will be coming up soon and I need to leave before then." With that, she closed the hatch and powered up the Prowler.
"Bye, then," John said, bewildered. He retreated from the Prowler, and watched her take off. A moment later, he was heading for the road, approximately a quarter of a mile away.
~
Arns later. Hours. Whatever. John had been back on Earth for such a short time and was already reverting to Earth time measurements. He'd come out of the copse near mile-marker sixty-eight, and had waited for the sun to come up. And then he'd begun trying to hitch a ride.
As the time went by, he practiced his story. He'd need a good excuse to explain his appearance by the roadside, and a reason for getting a ride into town. Finally, a car slowed and stopped.
John ran to the passenger window, looking in as the driver rolled the window down. The car was an older model, but it had Florida plates. "Hello, I need a ride into town," he greeted, looking in. The owner was an older man, about sixty or so. He looked like he'd been on the road for some time.
John took a breath and went into his spiel. "My wife's in the hospital, having a baby. I found out and my car broke down on the way… we live out in the boondocks, just moved in a few months ago. I don't have a car phone, and I really need to get into town," he explained.
The older man smiled, and opened the door. "C'mon in," he said in a gravelly voice. "I'm on my way into town, myself."
An extremely grateful John slid into the passenger seat, pulling on the seatbelt and closing the door. It felt so alien to be sitting in a car for the first time in two cycles. "Thanks, you don't know how much this means to me," he said.
~
The older man had taken him to the hospital, asking questions about John's baby and wife all the way. John lied, making up a whole life for himself. He told the man, who introduced himself as Jim, that he and his wife had just moved from Fort Lauderdale, trying to get away from the hectic city life. He claimed that they'd wanted to raise their first kid in the Keys, like he'd been raised when he was a boy.
John found himself getting deeper and deeper into the story he spun out. He was almost disappointed when they arrived at the nearest hospital nearly forty-five minutes later. Jim had offered to accompany him inside, but John thanked him and declined. As he stood outside the front door of the hospital, he waved to the old man, and then casually walked inside.
Five minutes later, he reemerged. Jim was gone. John took a glance around. The city, if it could be called that, was rather small. He wasn't even sure which Key he was on, but was intensely grateful that he'd bothered to find a mile-marker. Without it, he'd surely be lost when he attempted to return to the rendezvous spot where Aeryn would pick him up. Spotting a supermarket, he whistled to himself. "Jackpot."
A large, bulky machine stood on near the entrance of the store – it could only be one thing - an ATM machine. John dug his wallet out of his pocket, and then found his ATM card. He inserted the card, and it asked for a password.
John paused. Oh, dren. I've forgotten the password! He stared at the screen in a panic, and then it came to him. Birthday. Alex's birthday. He felt a pang in his gut, but quickly punched the number into the computer and uttered a prayer under his breath.
"Man, I hope this works…"
The computer paused for a moment, and John grimaced… and then the prompt appeared. John grinned. Three minutes later, he walked away with three hundred dollars tucked safely in his pocket.
~
John was next. He stepped up to the counter, placing the package down in front of him. "I'd like to mail this, the fastest option you've got," he told the clerk. He'd packed the tapes carefully, in supplies he'd found at the post office. "You also need to charge me for the box." He tapped the address scrawled in sharpie on the brown paper.
"Yessir," the clerk said, taking the package.
John looked around in amazement. He hadn't thought much about it in the past few days, but now that he was home, he felt both awkward and comfortable at the same time. They were all Sebaceans, aliens, and not a one of them knew it. Hell, he didn't even know for sure himself… but deep down, he knew, the way dogs instinctively knew when a earthquake was about to occur.
He was nearly bursting with the urge to tell someone, anyone. He had the key to one of the biggest mysteries that bothered every scientist who ever studied the evolution of the Human species. And if he told any of them, they'd probably dismiss him with a disdainful laugh.
"Sir?" The clerk was calling him. John snapped back to attention, out of his little reverie.
"Uh, yeah?"
"That'll be eleven dollars and seventy-three cents."
"Right," John said, and he dug into his pocket, finding the billfold.
~
After sending off the tapes, John returned to the supermarket and went shopping. He grinned in amazement at products he'd never thought he'd see again. Although he was sorely tempted to spend more time remembering, it was getting late. It was already past early afternoon, he realized sadly. One day back, and it was ending so quickly.
He sighed, finding what he'd looked for. Double-A batteries – lots of them. He didn't know the next time he'd be able to make it back to Earth, but now that they knew where it was, he felt safer. He'd be able to record more messages to his Dad without worrying about the batteries drying up or the tapes running out. Speaking of tapes, he reminded himself, I'd better get some. John found several packages on the stationary aisle of the store, and grabbed them all.
John passed the frozen section on his way to the front counter, where he cast a longing glance back at the ice cream. If only he'd had time. He stood in line behind a woman with a full cart and a cranky kid. The cashier behind the counter looked both bored and harried, and John let his mind wander when he noticed something on the racks.
Chocolate. Chocolate!
John grinned again, and grabbed a bar. Then, on a whim, he grabbed several more. He couldn't wait until the crew tried out chocolate. He'd show the Hynerian dominar what a real delicacy tasted like, in any case.
~
John felt extremely lucky, for once. There was a taxi service on the island. He found the number in a phone book, gave his address, and waited. After a short time had passed, a yellow cab pulled up to the curb, and John got in.
"I need you to take me out to mile-marker sixty-eight," John said.
The cabbie nodded, and pulled away from the curb. John watched out the window as his first contact with Human civilization in two cycles grew small and disappeared as they rounded a corner. He sighed, a depression hitting him. He was leaving it all, again.
He spent the entire ride in the cab watching the scenery, soaking in every detail he could. When the taxi reached the mile-marker, the sun had begun to set. John paid the cabbie, and watched as he drove away. When he'd left John's sight, he turned and plunged headfirst into the trees.
As he walked, he pulled his comm unit out of his pocket, where he'd stored it. Aeryn had tried to deter him from bringing it with, but John had insisted, in case he'd gotten in trouble.
"Pilot," he spoke into the comm. "If you can hear me, don't bother to respond… just let Aeryn know that I'm waiting at the rendezvous spot." He turned the comm off, sitting down on the trunk of a fallen tree. He waited out the arns, watching as the night grew dark.
He was on Earth. Again. And he was going to leave. For a while, he was torn again. So easily, he could get up, walk out of these woods, and back to the road. He could send up a message to Pilot to get the frell out of the area, as fast as possible, and forget about him. And then he could crush the comm.
The idea tempted him.
But John knew he couldn't and wouldn't do so. He'd made a promise. And several arns later, when he heard the familiar hum of Aeryn's ship, he was still waiting.
~
The trip back to Moya had been silent, quick, and, thankfully, uneventful. Aeryn had barely spoken more than three words to him, and John was lost in his own thoughts. The moment they'd docked, Aeryn had left, claiming to have some chore or duty to attend to.
John had nodded, and went immediately to his quarters, dropping his new possessions onto his bed. He turned to leave for the Command, when he remembered. The chocolate. A tired grin surfaced, and he pulled out a single bar.
"John, you are back!" Zhaan greeted enthusiastically as he entered Command. All the crew had assembled there, save Aeryn. He wondered where she was, but decided not to ask.
"Yeah… had my little field trip. And I brought you back a little souvenir," he added, showing them the candy.
"What's that?" Chiana asked, immediately interested.
"This," John announced, "is chocolate. It's a snack on Earth… and everybody loves chocolate. It's not exactly a great source of nutrition, but we eat it anyway. I guess you could say, it's sort of a delicacy," he added.
Rygel's ears perked at the word. "Well, are you going to show us this chocolate, or what?" He asked gruffly.
John grinned, and opened the package. He broke off squares of the food, and handed it to the members of the crew. Rygel looked at it hungrily, then shoved it in his mouth. D'Argo regarded it carefully, then tasted it.
In moments, they were all pleasantly surprised.
"Has anyone seen Aeryn?" John asked the other crewmembers. They were immersed in their chocolate, and paid little attention to his question. Rygel was making ecstatic exclamations, punctuated by waves of his tiny arms.
"My word, Crichton," he said. "Your species proves to have some redeeming value after all." The Hynerian uttered a satisfied grunt.
"Hey, hello? Aeryn?" John asked again.
"Perhaps you should ask Pilot," Zhaan suggested. She nibbled on the small square. "This is a remarkable food."
"Thanks, Zhaan," he said, and she nodded to him. "I'm going to bring him a piece; so I'll ask him when I get down there. Night." He turned quickly and left the Command, heading to Pilot's chambers.
~
"Hey, Pilot," John greeted as he entered the room. "How's Moya doing?"
"She is well, Commander Crichton," Pilot responded. "What can we do for you?"
"Well, I brought something back with me from Earth. I thought you might like to try it," he said, breaking off a piece of the quickly dwindling chocolate bar.
"This is the… chocolate… you have given the rest of the crew?" Pilot asked.
"Yup. I thought I'd bring some down for you, so you can try. That, and I also have a question."
Pilot nodded his head, and tapped something on his console. "Thank you, Commander. I appreciate the gesture. What is your question?"
"Well, can you locate Aeryn for me?"
"Certainly. She is currently in her quarters."
"Thanks Pilot. Uh, how do you want me to give you this…" John trailed off, unsure. He couldn't recall seeing Pilot eat before, and didn't know if his claws were capable of manipulating such a small object.
"If you could just put it to my mouth, I would be grateful," Pilot said, a note of amusement in his voice.
John climbed up alongside Pilot, carefully bringing the square to his mouth. Pilot took it, and cocked his head. "This is… rather… unusual," he said. "But it is pleasant," he added with a smile.
"Glad you like it, Pilot. Unfortunately, I've only got a small store with me. Everyone seems to like it so much we may have to stop by Earth more often," John said, only half-jokingly. "Goodnight, Pilot."
"Goodnight, Commander. Sleep well."
~
John found Aeryn in her quarters, exactly where Pilot had said she would be. The door was open, and she was seated on her bed, cleaning her gun. "Can I come in?" John asked quietly, standing in the doorway.
Aeryn shrugged, glancing up for a moment, then said, "If you must."
"I brought you something," he began. "Something from Earth… the rest of the crew already had some up on Command, and I brought some down to Pilot, but I couldn't help the feeling that I'd forgotten someone," he said, a small grin on his face.
"What's that?" Aeryn asked, sounding distracted.
"Chocolate." He pulled back the foil and snapped another piece off of the larger chunk, which was nearly gone.
"What-lit?" Aeryn asked, finally looking up.
"It's a food from Earth. Well, not really a food… more like a treat that's really popular. And really good for curing the blues," he added.
"Blues? You mean Zhaan? She's sick?" Aeryn asked, confused.
"Uh, no, the blues… it's an Earth saying for when someone's feeling a little sad," John explained.
"I'm fine," Aeryn's reply came, immediate and automatic.
"Good, then you won't mind trying some chocolate!" John grinned at her brilliantly.
She stared at him for a moment, then set her gun aside, sighing. "Fine, Crichton, I will try your chocolate. Bring it here." She motioned towards her bed.
He sat beside her, presenting her with the brown square. Aeryn took it and popped it in her mouth, beginning to chew vigorously, when John laughed. "No, no, you don't eat it like that," he smiled. "You kind of… let it melt in your mouth. That's the best way to enjoy it."
Aeryn did as he instructed, her face reflecting surprise. "It… tastes good," she finally acknowledged. "I like it. Good to know that Earth produces something other than talkative Humans," she said. Her face was like a mask, and John couldn't tell if she was joking or not.
Aeryn picked up her gun and returned to cleaning it. John looked at her for a moment, but she was ignoring him again.
"Aeryn, what's wrong?"
"I'm fine," she said again.
"Bull, Aeryn. Why have you been avoiding me since we got back? Hell, you hardly said a word to me all the way to Earth and coming back from it. What'd I do now?" He asked.
Aeryn sighed heavily, and placed her gun on a table by her bed. "Fine. If you must know, I heard you talking into your recorder before we left."
John groaned inwardly. Of course, he thought, she heard me telling Dad about coming home to stay one day. But what was more interesting was that Aeryn seemed to care about him going home. And not in a way that indicated she was happy about it.
"Aeryn," he said. "What I said on the tape, about going home to stay one day… I'd like to. Honestly. I wasn't lying when I told you the other night that I wasn't going home. I can't go home now. It's just… I guess I said it partly to reassure my dad. I would love to be able to go home and visit. But with Crais and Scorpius… it's not safe. I realize that."
"And then there is the crew here… I've already explained; you guys are like a family. Loosing D'Argo, Zhaan, Chiana, Pilot… and you… I don't think I could take it. I told you I wasn't going to stay… don't you trust me enough to keep my word? Did you think I'd get to Earth and bolt?"
She looked away from him. "No."
John took Aeryn's chin in his fingers and pulled her face around so that she was forced to look him in the eye. And then, he leaned in, kissing her lips softly. It was only the second kiss between them that he'd initiated. Aeryn's lips tasted of the chocolate she'd just eaten; sweet. After a moment, he pulled back. "The kiss is still sweet, Aeryn," he said softly.
She looked away, covering her eyes with one hand. "How can you…" she stopped, took a breath. "I've been so cruel to you. I've beaten you, ridiculed you and your ship and everything about your species. I've treated you with contempt. I treat you like dren. How can you still be so frelling caring!"
"Because I care, Aeryn," he said.
"Why, John? Why do you bother?"
"Remember what I said, back when you stood up for me against Crais? You have become more, Aeryn. You're not just the sum of your PK training anymore. You've learned so much. You're still a warrior, but you're more than just a warrior. You're Aeryn Sun, and you're one of us."
John pulled Aeryn close to him, an arm around her shoulder. She slumped into him, and they laid back on the bed, their legs still hanging over the edge. "Thank you," she murmured quietly. He squeezed her shoulder in reply.
A few microts passed in silence. "You know, Aeryn… Aeryn?" John looked down at the woman beside him. She'd fallen fast asleep. He grinned, and sat up. She'd obviously been more tired than she let on; Aeryn didn't even stir as he got up from the bed.
John pulled the blankets of her bed down, then lifted Aeryn onto the sheet. He pulled off her boots, setting them by her bedside. He was grateful she'd not been wearing her gun; trying to remove that would've probably gotten him shot. He smiled down at her again, then pulled the blankets over her, and stood. After a moment's hesitation, he leaned down and placed a kiss on her cheek, and then left her quarters.
~
John made his way down the tier, when a familiar grey shape appeared in front of him. "Boo!" Chiana yelled.
John jumped, then grinned. At least she hadn't tackled him for once. "Hi, Chi."
"Mmm, John," she purred in a playful voice. "I was wondering… do you have any of that chokkit stuff left?" She smiled her best innocent smile.
"Chocolate, Chi," he corrected. "And as a matter of fact, I do." He grinned again, then started down the tier again.
Chiana trailed after him. "Well, can I have some more?" she pleaded.
"Hmm, I don't know…" John said, teasing her. He came to the galley and entered it, looking for something to drink.
"Aw, c'mon, Crichton. Just a piece."
John pulled the foil from his pocket that contained the last piece of chocolate in the bar. "Okay… but you gotta share with me," he said, splitting it in half.
Chiana grinned and grabbed the portion he offered her, and they sat at the table. Chiana made exaggerated noises of enjoyment, and in a few microts, had John chuckling. Then she stopped, looking at him.
"You know, you could've stayed… you were home," she said.
"Yeah, I could've. But I wouldn't have been able to live with myself," John said.
Chiana smirked. "Uh-huh. You're that far gone, huh?"
John looked at her, his face coloring a bit. He played dumb. "What?"
She rolled her eyes and puffed out a breath of air. "Oh, come on, John. You know exactly who I'm talking about. Little Miss Peacekeeper."
John smiled ruefully. "Is it that obvious?"
Chiana rolled her eyes again and smacked him on the forehead playfully. "Frell, John. Everyone on board knows. Even His Royal Toadness. The only question left is when you two are gonna frell each other silly and get it over with."
"Chiana!" John said, floored. Chiana could be the most blunt person on board sometimes, even in an area where the others had enough decorum to be sensitive.
"Well, it's true! Zhaan and D'Argo won't say anything to you, and Rygel, well, he doesn't care. 'Bodybreeders, I'll never understand them,'" she said, doing her best Rygel impression.
John had to grin at that. "Chiana… just keep it under your hat, okay? Do like D'Argo and Zhaan: don't say anything about it. You know how Aeryn is."
"John, I'm not wearing a hat," Chiana stated.
"Oh, duh," he said. "Earth saying. It means, 'don't talk about it'. Okay?"
Chiana nodded. "Okay."
John stretched and stood. "I am going off to bed. I've had a long weekan, and I need sleep." Spotting the look on Chiana's face, he said, "Sleep, Chiana. Besides, shouldn't you be getting back to D'Argo?"
Chiana only smiled an innocent smile at him again. "Yeah, sure. Thanks for the chocolate, John."
~
John had intended to return to his quarters, but instead he found himself making his way to the terrace instead. As tired as he was, he was drawn back to look at the planet he'd called home. As he stared out at the blue sphere, the urge to hop into Farscape 1 and leave rose again. He fought the temptation.
"John." Zhaan's soft, calm voice emanated from behind him, and he jumped, then turned, feeling guilty.
"Hey, Zhaan," he said tiredly. He gave her a small grin, then turned back to look at Earth.
Zhaan watched him for a moment. "You could have stayed, John." Her voice was soft.
John heard the words, and sagged. He sat heavily on the terrace, still looking at the planet, covering his face with a shaking hand and hanging his head. Zhaan started forward, concerned. She hadn't meant to upset him so. "John!"
She kneeled beside him, then sat, her robes fanning out around her. Zhaan took John's shoulders in her hands, pulling him into an embrace. John didn't look up, but leaned into her. Zhaan's concern grew greater. Normally, John was the most expressive member of the crew, and willing to talk with any of the others, even if they didn't want to hear it. But he'd hidden his grief well enough that Zhaan hadn't detected the depths it reached.
"I'm so sorry, John, I didn't mean to be so callous," she said, lifting his head so that he looked into her eyes. He looked up, thumbing moisture from beneath his eyes.
"Hell, I'm sorry Zhaanny," he said, taking a deep breath. "I guess I'm so tired that it's affecting me worse than I thought. Breaking down and crying like a baby." He smiled weakly, then laughed at himself. "You know, I thought making this decision would be easy. Frell. I honestly thought this was a decision I'd never have to make."
Zhaan hushed him, pulling him into a deeper hug and rocking slightly back and forth. "But you decided to stay. Why, John?"
He gestured. "I can't leave all this. You guys are family now. I thought if I had the chance… frell. If I'd had the chance a cycle and a half ago, I would've left in a microt. No regrets. Now… now it's so hard. One thing I never thought I'd ever have was friends from outer space." He laughed again, and shook his head.
Zhaan watched him worriedly, noticing that his eyes were badly bloodshot. "John, you need rest. When was the last time you slept?"
John shrugged. "Two, three solar days ago." He had to laugh at the shocked expression on Zhaan's face. His hand went to her cheek, and he reassured her. "I know, I really should be in bed. And I will go, soon. I wanted one last look."
John turned his gaze back to the planet, and Zhaan's gaze followed. After a few microts, he spoke again. "You know… when you live there, you kinda forget how beautiful a place it can be. You get used to it, and it becomes normal. Now, it's almost… alien." He turned his head again, sighed, and tapped his comm. "Pilot?"
"Yes, Commander?" Pilot's calm and cool voice
called.
"Take us out of here, please? Just… out of the system. To the next commerce planet. Anywhere. Just out of here before I up and change my mind." Zhaan squeezed John's arm comfortingly, and he smiled at her again.
"Would you like for Moya to starburst, Commander?"
"No, no, Pilot. Not now; everyone else is sleeping and I doubt they'd appreciate it. Let's just leave the system," he replied.
"As you wish, Crichton," Pilot said.
John stood up, walking to the edge of the terrace again. Zhaan stood and followed him, taking his arm. "Goodbye," he murmured quietly. "I'll see you again, Dad, I swear," he promised.
John let out a sigh, then glanced at Zhaan. "You know… I guess what they say is true; you can never really go home again."
Zhaan tilted her head, looking at the Human speculatively. "Yes," she said, "That is a wise and ultimately true statement, John. We are never who we once were."
John nodded as he felt Moya shift as it left her orbit around Earth's moon. "We can never go home again, but we can make our new homes wherever fate leads us."
END.