The Misadventures of Weiß Part 2:
Ken's Extra Coat
This story is about Ken. Ken has issues. One of them is.he has accidents. This is the story behind Ken's accidents and why he always has two coats on. You know, the one he wears and the one he has around his waist? Yea. That's what this story is about. ***
One day, Ran came to Ken. He was asking some stupid question about eating ice cream. But this story isn't about Ran eating ice cream. That was the last story. It is now 9:08 PM, April 20th. But those events have nothing to do with this story. This is about Ken. Not about Hitler's birthday or National Marijuana Day.
After the author once more got done going off topic, Ken started laughing at Ran. This isn't about Ran, but wait a minute. He'll be gone soon enough.
Well, Ken stopped laughing long enough to see Ran's glare. That only made him laugh harder. He didn't stop laughing until he realized Ran had left. He giggled a little and stood up. He stretched a little and looked around, confused.
"Something's different about this place." he said to himself.
He looked up.
He looked down.
He looked left.
He looked right.
He looked around.
He looked upside down.
He looked inside out.
He even looked gay.
He decided there was one last thing he could do. He began to unzip his pants as he noticed a. moistness to them. He looked down.
"Hmmm." he said as he saw the new stain.
He sniffed his fingers.
"Smells like piss," he said.
He grabbed his crotch.
"Still warm," he observed.
He froze. It was impossible. He couldn't have. It WASN'T possible. But it was.
"NO!" he screamed. "I pissed my pants!"
He dropped to the floor and broke down. He coughed when he smelled the piss and stood up.
"There's only one thing I can do," he said ready to take action.
"I.I'm buying new pants!" he exclaimed.
Now, you may be wondering why he didn't just change or wash his pants. I wondered that at first, too. But then I figured the story would end right then. So that's why.
As the author stopped writing off topic again, Ken noticed something else. The coat around his waist had also been pissed on.
"Damn it he said. "It has piss on it, too."
He took the coat from his waist. He took his other coat off. He looked in the mirror that magically appeared.
"Mirror, mirror.On the wall," he started, "who is the fairest of them all?"
Silence.
He looked at himself. The large stain in his crotch was very obvious. He turned around and noticed it had spread to his ass.
"Shit," he said. "Should I wear my coat forwards or backwards?" He pondered this several minutes and chose to tie it the same way as the other.
"Besides," he said, "with all of the people looking at my ass, this way is safer."
He didn't realize his flat ass didn't draw much attention. He also didn't notice his dresser drawer, full of clean pants, was open.
He made his way outdoor to get o the nearest subway. He took the long way, just so everyone would notice he pissed himself, and eventually found his way to the subway. To his surprise, it was closed. Why the subway was closed is unknown, it just was. So don't ask.
"Shit," Ken said.
"What is it my good friend?" Farf asked, coming up behind him.
"I don't want to talk about it!" he replied.
"You pissed yourself, huh?" Farf asked sympathetically.
".."
"It's all right," Farf said, rubbing Ken's shoulder. "It happens to the best of us."
"You mean you.?"
"Me? HAH! No," he replied grinning. "Schuldig. Sad story.very, very said."
"Did he ever get over it?" Ken asked hopefully.
"Pissing himself?" Farf asked.
"Yea," Ken replied, looking down.
"No." Farf said sadly.
"So what did he do?" Ken asked loosing hope.
"Well," Farf started, offering a cookie to Ken. "He changed his clothes."
"He.He WHAT?!" Ken exclaimed.
"Yea, he changed."
"But that makes the whole point of being a cartoon pointless!"
"Huh?'
"The whole reason I became an anime character is because I wouldn't have to change clothes!"
Even though Ken didn't notice they do change clothes every so often, the conversation continued as it was.
"Well, he got clothes that looked the exact same."
"Could anyone tell?"
"Nope! Not at all."
"Who's talking now?"
"I dunno. I lost track a little after the 'Farf said' and 'Ken said' stuff stopped.
"Could we just make up who's talking?"
"Yea, I guess. I want to be Ken!" Ken exclaimed.
"OK, I'll be Farf then," Farf said.
"Thanks for the advice," Ken said.
"No problem Farf."
"It's Ken."
"Oh yea," Farf said.
So Ken got to walking, even though him and Farf switched places in there somewhere, and got his check that magically appeared and got it cashed.
He left Farf standing there, and after about a mile of walking, he realized something. Other than the fact that he was the only one stupid enough to buy clothes like that, his pants were also dry.
This story is about Ken. Ken has issues. One of them is.he has accidents. This is the story behind Ken's accidents and why he always has two coats on. You know, the one he wears and the one he has around his waist? Yea. That's what this story is about. ***
One day, Ran came to Ken. He was asking some stupid question about eating ice cream. But this story isn't about Ran eating ice cream. That was the last story. It is now 9:08 PM, April 20th. But those events have nothing to do with this story. This is about Ken. Not about Hitler's birthday or National Marijuana Day.
After the author once more got done going off topic, Ken started laughing at Ran. This isn't about Ran, but wait a minute. He'll be gone soon enough.
Well, Ken stopped laughing long enough to see Ran's glare. That only made him laugh harder. He didn't stop laughing until he realized Ran had left. He giggled a little and stood up. He stretched a little and looked around, confused.
"Something's different about this place." he said to himself.
He looked up.
He looked down.
He looked left.
He looked right.
He looked around.
He looked upside down.
He looked inside out.
He even looked gay.
He decided there was one last thing he could do. He began to unzip his pants as he noticed a. moistness to them. He looked down.
"Hmmm." he said as he saw the new stain.
He sniffed his fingers.
"Smells like piss," he said.
He grabbed his crotch.
"Still warm," he observed.
He froze. It was impossible. He couldn't have. It WASN'T possible. But it was.
"NO!" he screamed. "I pissed my pants!"
He dropped to the floor and broke down. He coughed when he smelled the piss and stood up.
"There's only one thing I can do," he said ready to take action.
"I.I'm buying new pants!" he exclaimed.
Now, you may be wondering why he didn't just change or wash his pants. I wondered that at first, too. But then I figured the story would end right then. So that's why.
As the author stopped writing off topic again, Ken noticed something else. The coat around his waist had also been pissed on.
"Damn it he said. "It has piss on it, too."
He took the coat from his waist. He took his other coat off. He looked in the mirror that magically appeared.
"Mirror, mirror.On the wall," he started, "who is the fairest of them all?"
Silence.
He looked at himself. The large stain in his crotch was very obvious. He turned around and noticed it had spread to his ass.
"Shit," he said. "Should I wear my coat forwards or backwards?" He pondered this several minutes and chose to tie it the same way as the other.
"Besides," he said, "with all of the people looking at my ass, this way is safer."
He didn't realize his flat ass didn't draw much attention. He also didn't notice his dresser drawer, full of clean pants, was open.
He made his way outdoor to get o the nearest subway. He took the long way, just so everyone would notice he pissed himself, and eventually found his way to the subway. To his surprise, it was closed. Why the subway was closed is unknown, it just was. So don't ask.
"Shit," Ken said.
"What is it my good friend?" Farf asked, coming up behind him.
"I don't want to talk about it!" he replied.
"You pissed yourself, huh?" Farf asked sympathetically.
".."
"It's all right," Farf said, rubbing Ken's shoulder. "It happens to the best of us."
"You mean you.?"
"Me? HAH! No," he replied grinning. "Schuldig. Sad story.very, very said."
"Did he ever get over it?" Ken asked hopefully.
"Pissing himself?" Farf asked.
"Yea," Ken replied, looking down.
"No." Farf said sadly.
"So what did he do?" Ken asked loosing hope.
"Well," Farf started, offering a cookie to Ken. "He changed his clothes."
"He.He WHAT?!" Ken exclaimed.
"Yea, he changed."
"But that makes the whole point of being a cartoon pointless!"
"Huh?'
"The whole reason I became an anime character is because I wouldn't have to change clothes!"
Even though Ken didn't notice they do change clothes every so often, the conversation continued as it was.
"Well, he got clothes that looked the exact same."
"Could anyone tell?"
"Nope! Not at all."
"Who's talking now?"
"I dunno. I lost track a little after the 'Farf said' and 'Ken said' stuff stopped.
"Could we just make up who's talking?"
"Yea, I guess. I want to be Ken!" Ken exclaimed.
"OK, I'll be Farf then," Farf said.
"Thanks for the advice," Ken said.
"No problem Farf."
"It's Ken."
"Oh yea," Farf said.
So Ken got to walking, even though him and Farf switched places in there somewhere, and got his check that magically appeared and got it cashed.
He left Farf standing there, and after about a mile of walking, he realized something. Other than the fact that he was the only one stupid enough to buy clothes like that, his pants were also dry.