ADMIN: Please contact me, I have emailed support many, many times over the past few weeks to no avail, and tried a couple years ago as well, and got no response. I have proof of prior ownership of the BeastCorbin account, which I can send upon request. I would like to compile this story on one account so I can rewrite some of the older chapters without having an account banned.
A/N: This is a continuation of Rage Control Techniques, my old story on my old account, which I can no longer access. Please read the first 6 chapters under my old account name"BeastCorbin" before attempting to read these new chapters, you will be very confused. I'm sorry for some of the quality of the older chapters I am trying to gain access or have them deleted or compiled so I can edit/repost them here without overstepping guidelines.
To any returning fans: Thank you so much for your endless patience (or impatience), I will be working to regularly update this story again, and hopefully it's somewhhat worth the 5 year wait for new content. 3
And, as always, FAKE and all the characters therein belong to Sanami Matoh!
Ch 7: Deceptions
Drake's POV
Sitting at our desk and waiting for JJ to return was agony, it felt like five years had passed since he had left. He had probably gone up to the roof to be alone.
I could understand wanting to be alone after what he went through last night, I could understand not wanting to be seen. Maybe I'd just check on him, just a peek. As I got to the stairwell, JJ was trudging down the last flight. He was drenched in sweat and pale, despite his sun-pink nose and cheeks. His shirt was buttoned all the way up, but his tie was still slack and one sleeve was still rolled up.
"It's really hot up there." He murmured when he saw me, struggling to roll the sleeve down. His hands were shaking. He had probably come in to avoid the heat before he had decompressed enough.
"Are you okay?" I asked, closing the stairwell door behind myself for some semblance of privacy. "I was coming up to check on you."
"I'm fine, really." I straightened his tie for him when he reached the bottom step, taking care not to bump the sore areas around his neck while I tightened it. I wanted to smooth his shirt across his shoulders and chest, but I abstained, worrying it would seem too intimate. JJ was avoiding my gaze by working intently on buttoning his cuff and didn't notice my awkwardly poised hands.
"Your hands are shaking." I murmured, lowering mine.
"I took another call from Reggie. He's going to make it up to me, so he's coming over again tonight." He finally got the button in and straightened his own shirt. I was hurt, but not surprised.
"JJ-" I started.
"I know, we have plans tonight," he cut in, "but he said he'll meet up with me afterwards, it's fine." He pushed his sweat-drenched hair back and out of his face. His eyes seemed dull and distracted, not nearly as bright as that shirt usually made them look.
"That's not what I'm worried about, I'm worried you're going to get stuck in that cycle." I sighed and set my hands on his shoulders so I could look him in the eyes, trying to get him to actually hear me. "He may be nice to you for a while, but you know what he's capable of. You know that he'll put his hands on you again." JJ's lips settled into a firm line while I spoke. "I know you don't want to hear what I'm saying, but you know it's the truth. You know that's how this kind of thing goes, we've both seen it"
"I know-" The stairwell door behind me opened, causing JJ to freeze. Ted and James pushed in, navigating around us with cigarettes in their mouths. They nodded at us on their way up. JJ waited unitl we heard the door to the roof shut behind them. "I don't want to talk about this here."
"You're right." I agreed quietly. "Tonight?"
"Tonight." JJ nodded and gave me a small, forced smile. We returned to our desks. I tried to engage him with our case, but the distraction he had maintained over the past few weeks seemed amplified. I tried to force myself to focus, but I was also finding it difficult.
Why hadn't I seen it sooner? Why didn't I recognize the signs the instant he told me about Reggie? Why else would he have kept it a secret from me? He knew at lease a little bit about my father, and how he was. Was he trying to protect me from someone he knew would raise red flags from my past? If so, he was protecting the wrong person.
JJ feigned a studious facade, flipping through files. His darting eyes didn't fool me, though. He had minimal interest, if he was even absorbing anything he was reading. He was tapping his pen, biting the caps. His oral fixation always made my heckles tingle. It only took a couple hours of both of us pretending to be absorbed in our work for me to notice the small, circular blood stain on his sleeve. It looked fresh.
"Are you bleeding?" I asked, reaching to touch the darkened fabric. He pulled back slightly with an uneasy look on his face.
"I got a bloody nose on the roof. It's the dry heat." He let it roll off his shoulders like nothing, and the lack of concern with his tarnished shirt didn't sit right with me. When he glanced up at the clock on the wall I tried to discern which nostril he had bled from, and I was discouraged to find neither of them had any reddish tinge. Was he being dishonest with me? I couldn't pick up on whether or not he had broken a sweat, since his skin was still somewhat glossy from being out in the sun. I didn't want to ask him about it, I didn't want to stress him out any more than necessary. But I worried.
"It's not from the trauma, is it?" I asked as gently as I could.
"Oh, no. Not at all." JJ tried to comfort me with a soft smile, "Completely unrelated, don't worry." I nodded, still unconvinced. I would just keep a slightly closer eye on him for signs of concussion, or worse. I probably should have done so last night.
I was so stupid for letting him sleep after being hurt so badly.
So stupid.
How had I been so blinded by him, by his vulnerability, that I ignored any possible health complications the damage could have caused? My history, training, and instincts should have taken over, but instead I had coddled him. I took him home and wrapped him up, put him in bed.
My God, he could have gone into a coma, or worse, and it would have been my fault. Were my feelings so distracting that I was putting him in danger? In more danger than his new boyfriend was? Well, probably not more danger, but they didn't seem to be keeping me as alert as I could be.
Am I too close to the situation? Do I need to step back? Re-analyze my feelings around him? How did Dee cope with his feelings for Ryo before Ryo returned them? How did they affect his performance in the line of duty? Maybe I should talk to him, and get some advice. But not before I figured out what the hell was going on with me. Maybe Dee could help me with that, or even Ryo. Ryo would probably be a better person to go to for guidance on that topic. Especially considering how he had to come to terms with his own sexuality when he and Dee were already partners.
I glanced over at their desk, Dee and Ryo were nowhere to be seen. They probably had a break in their case. Good for them, I wish I could say the same for us.
"Could you pass me that dusty file? The one you had to dropped between cabinets?" I asked, giving him a slight grin, trying to lighten the mood. He nodded and passed it without a shift in expression.
Ryo's POV
"They're coming in to the station for their statement, right?" Dee asked, looking over the address in the file I had handed him. "I know people in that neighborhood don't like to be known as snitches."
"Yes, definitely." I chirped, patting the edges of the pile in my arms to keep them orderly. "I also spoke to Rose about getting them a plainclothes tail, to make sure they're not followed by undesirables."
"Good call." he grunted, shutting the file and tucking it under his arm. "When can we expect them?"
"About forty minutes."
"Not bad. Do you have any prepared questions?" I flipped my notepad to the correct page and handed it to him. He looked it over briefly before nodding and closing it. "I'll go set aside a room for when they get here." he tapped me on the chest with the spiral before tucking it into the file.
"Thank you, I'll notify the front desk." We hurried in our different directions. I let Judy know we had a witness coming in and to let them in the back as soon as they arrive. Afterwards I sought out Dee and found him in conference room 4. I laid out the files we needed. "I'll print the suspect sheet if you want to browse the files, see if you find anything you might have questions about." I offered. Dee leaned forward, his palms on the desk, staring up at me from under his bangs. He took a long breath, which made me pause on my way out. "Did you need something else?" I asked.
"Come here." He tilted his head to draw me over, his eyes were so intense it almost made me uneasy. I moved closer to him, he touched one of my wrists and pressed against me, pulled my hand against him. I could feel the heat and pressure of his arousal through his jeans. "I've been hard since we left the roof-" he whispered into my ear. I coyly tried to pull back.
"Dee, we're at work-" I started quietly.
"Doesn't that make it more exciting?" He murmured, and I could smell the tobacco wafting from his skin, always intoxicating.
"We'll get in trouble, there are cameras in here." I ducked away from an aggressive kiss he tried to land on me.
"Let them watch-" he tried to pull me in again, but I refused, trying to peel his hand off me.
"Not at work, Dee-" He slipped his hands behind my thighs and turned to push me up onto the table, mauling my mouth. He had me by the back of my neck, he wouldn't let me go, no matter how hard I tried to keep my mouth closed. He was incorrigible, and it was alarming. "Dee, stop it-"
"Just touch me-" He pulled at my hand again, and I drew back more forcefully.
"Dee, NO." I pushed him off me, he lost his footing and fell back against a file cabinet. "I'm sorry-" I jumped up to help him back to his feet, and he grabbed the holster around my shoulders, spun me around to slam my chest into the cabinets. He fondled my backside roughly, and slapped it hard. Once, twice, a third time, then he let me go and stepped back. I slowly turned back toward him, stunned. At first his face was a hard mask of anger, then it slipped as he realized my state. My ass stung from his hand, and the crotch of my slacks was tented painfully. I tugged at my pants to try to hide what had happened, but Dee had already seen. A blush heated my cheeks. "I said no," I paused, trying to form the words that wouldn't leave my mouth. "You're supposed to stop when I say no, I would think that you would know that by now." My throat tightened, and I brushed my sweaty palms off on my thighs. I wasn't holding it together, and that disgusted me. "You're in fucking law enforcement." I hurried out to let him weigh my words against his conscience.
I slipped into the nearest bathroom and splashed my face with cold water, willing my body to calm down. I squeezed my eyes shut and breathed in and out as slowly as I could, allowing my fervor to cool. I had to steel up. I couldn't let anyone know that I had shown such a strange weakness. Not when I had a witness coming in to build upon our suspects. I couldn't be this exposed during an interview, I could barely be this exposed alone with Dee. I was ashamed that my body had responded that way, it was like nothing I had to deal with before.
Once I let out the last long exhale I felt I needed, I straightened my hair, my shirt, and headed to the copy room only to realize that I had left the pages I needed with Dee. I was anxious about having to go back to him to get them, it was an unfamiliar feeling. It was very rare when I wasn't happy to see him. I sidled back into the conference to find him leaning back in one of the chairs, foot up on the table. He only moved his eyes to look up at me from the folder he was studying when I entered.
"Forgot the mugshots." I excused, quickly grabbing the papers I needed before backing out again. I logged in to the copy room computer to scan the mugshots in, add them to a couple lineups, and print them out. I did so in a daze, still embarrassed and uncomfortable. Dee hadn't been that pushy with me since early on in our relationship, and after a few solid conversations about boundaries he had been much better about it. He was probably just backsliding little, nothing another short talk couldn't fix.
What I couldn't figure out was how I had so completely lost control of my own anatomy. I pride myself on how much control I have over these things, and simply being swatted a few quick times had taken that away from me. I shook the thoughts out of my head and logged out, pulled the lineups from the printer, and headed to the front desk to inform Judy of which room we would be in. She smiled and nodded, let me know she would personally walk them back. I thanked her and went to hover outside the conference room door.
I didn't want to go in there with him, not alone.
Maybe I could have Rose come with me, ask him to sit in on our interview. He could provide a buffer at least. No, I couldn't have him around too much, it would make me too nervous. I would slip and say something to give us away, and it would ruin everything.
I didn't have to stand and ponder for long because Dee came out to stand with me in the hall.
"You got everything sorted out?" He asked somewhat cautiously. I handed over the paper without a word. Dee hesitated, as if I might lecture him or chew him out. I wanted to, a little bit, but the rest of me was still in too much turmoil over his- what was it, an attack? I couldn't call it that. 'Attack' felt too coarse a term to pin to Dee. "I'm probably going out with the guys again tonight."
"Again?" I asked, "Isn't that too much for one week?"
"C'mon, I don't go out that often." He rolled his eyes at me and cocked his head in that puppy-dog way he had.
"Two nights in a row, though?" I chided as gently as I could.
"They're all going out, besides, I only ever have a couple beers." He leaned against the door post, not quite as a challenge, but with the cocky assurance that I expected from him.
"Except a couple weeks ago, when you came home blackout drunk and passed out." I reminded him. "What if I met up with you there? I might stay a little late, I have a few things to go over-" with Rose, I didn't finish. Dee watched me for a moment, as if he knew what I had left off. He knew I had been meeting up with Rose here and there, but for all he knew it was work-related. "But I could come meet you after?"
"Maybe. How long are you planning on staying late for?" He asked, eyeing me narrowly.
"Two, maybe three hours." I answered, dropping my eyes a little, hoping he couldn't read me.
"Yeah, we should still be there, but text me before you head over so I can let you know if we are or not." He fiddled with the collar of his shirt for a moment, straightening and re-folding it. He usually wasn't one to be physically occupied by his anxieties. I tilted my head curiously at his gesture. I took it in and let him see me doing so before I met his eyes.
"Sounds good." I held his gaze a few seconds after he finished. When I realized he wasn't going to elaborate on what was bothering him I figured he must not have even noticed his own anomalous behavior, or that I had made a point of noticing it. "Are you going to apologize to me?"
"Apologize?" He asked, shifting his hips and propping a hand on one of them. "Ryo, I was trying to spice things up-"
"Remember that talk we had about boundaries? Especially at work?" Dee shut his mouth, and I relaxed a little when he didn't bring up my mortifying physical reaction. "We'll talk about it more when we get home. We need to focus on the case right now." He seemed to become more distant, and I watched while he faded back into his tough professional exterior. Hopefully he would behave for the rest of our shift.
"Alright, well, we better get in there and go over some of the initial witness statements, make sure of chronology." He grunted and headed back in. His change in demeanor put me at ease enough to follow him in. We poured over the statements until we both had a solid sense of what order everything occurred in.
Shortly after there was a soft knock on the door to alert us of our witness's arrival. We both stood to shake her hand and thanked her for her meeting with us. She took the seat we offered her across the table from us, and I began the rundown of the process.
"So, this should be pretty quick, we're just going to ask you a few things about the day in question, May 28th, at around 7:30pm that night. You mentioned on the phone you had some information about the suspects?"
"Yes, that's right. I was in the kitchen, making dinner for my husband- I remember 'cause he got off his shift early that day." She leaned forward and pressed the long leather wallet she held into her thigh as she did so. "And I heard the shots- It's not the first time in our neighborhood, y'know, so I look out the window, to see where it's coming from, I got children to protect, right? I have my kids in the other room."
"Of course." I nodded, jotting the bullet points down. "And you live directly next door to where the incident took place?"
"Yes, I do."
"And what did you see when you looked out there?"
"It was like, close to sunset. But I knew it was some boys from the neighborhood. I recognized them. Well, one of them. He goes by Chistosito. I don't know who the other boy was, but I got a good look at him, I could describe him."
"Ah, Chistosito. It won't be the first run-in we've had with him." Dee muttered, tapping a pen cap on the folder in front of him.
"He is a trouble maker." Mrs. Ramos nodded. "No respect for authority, or his elders."
"And what about the other boy, how old would you say?" I redirected.
"I couldn't tell, he could have been from sixteen to maybe twenty-five?" 16-25 yo, I wrote.
"How about height and weight? Tall, short, skinny, heavy?"
"Skinny, and tall. He was real willowy." Ramos fiddled with her wallet. "Ran like the wind, that kid, really fast." Thin, willowy.
"6'?" I asked, making sure to look up from my notepad, "Taller?"
"Maybe taller, I know Chistosito is kind of tall, but this kid was much taller." Dee leaned forward himself.
"Are we talking 6'3" or 6'7" tall?" He asked.
"Somewhere in the middle." 6'4-6'6.
"And about what time would you say you saw them?" I asked her, quickly checking the times of death and other witness accounts.
"It was after 7:30, but before 8. I didn't think to check the clock for the exact time, I didn't know how bad it was, or that I would need to come here." She rested her elbows on the table between us.
"Well, thank you again for coming in, we really appreciate any help we can get." I smiled, leaning in myself.
"Of course, detective. They were always such a nice family, it's so tragic how it happened. Losing two of your kids like that." Ramos shook her head and brushed her bangs back with a short swipe of her hand.
"I couldn't imagine." I breathed.
"Do you have children, Detective McLean?" Dee and I exchanged a look. Navigating this was always a task, you never knew how accepting folks were.
"Adopted, yes." I shifted and sat back again, hoping that was where we would leave it.
"Couldn't have any of your own?" Her eyes took on an gloss of compassion, and it made me squirm with unease.
"Not for lack of trying." Dee snickered, I nudged him to keep him quiet while I tried to find the right words.
"No, none of my own. And I'm very happy about the choices I've made for myself." I was finally able to say. Dee leaned his own elbows on the table, and I feared he would point out and poke fun at my unintentionally defensive tone.
"So, about this suspect. You said you got a good look at him, did you happen to see his face?" Dee asked, and I exhaled in relief under my breath.
"Yes I did. I saw his face, he ran right by my stoop." Mrs. Ramos nodded and pursed her lips. "I'd know that face in my sleep."
"That's great Mrs. Ramos, I'm glad to hear it." I smiled reassuringly at her. "Real quick before we wrap up, we have some photos-" I pulled out the lineup of mugshots and pushed it across the table so she could see it, and set a red pen down for her. "If you could take a look and see if you recognize any of these young men. Just mark the one you recognize from that night, and sign next to it." I watched her circle and sign the picture of Carlos 'Chistosito' Mendez, and pass it back to me. I smiled again and she returned the gesture. "Thank you so much, again, Mrs. Ramos. We'll find these guys, we'll bring them to justice." I began gathering the files and tapping the edges on the desk to straighten them. Dee stood and grabbed the few in front of himself.
"The next step-" Dee began, "is to bring in a police sketch artist, we have Jen Harmon on standby, she's very good, and quick. You should be out and on your way home in under half an hour."
"Here's my card-" I slid it across the desk to her. She quickly slipped it into her wallet. "My extension is on there, it forwards straight to my cell phone when I'm not on duty."
"Thank you so much, both of you." Ramos stood to shake our hands while we made our way out of the room. She cupped the backs of our hands warmly and quietly blessed us both. We let Jen in and closed the door, moving a few steps to the side so we could watch through the window while they got acquainted and sat to begin the process.
"Sweet woman." I murmured.
"Yeah, sweet." Dee said shortly. I tapped his shoulder with the file that held the signed mugshot.
"Could you look up Mendez's last known address, maybe call around for him?" Dee gave me a dubious face and snatched the folder from me.
"Yes, sir." He drawled, taking the file and strolling away. I folded my arms with the rest pressed against my chest and watched intently while Vicky Ramos described our second suspect to Jen. Jen would get it done and get it done well. Then we could put up posters, send them to the media, really get the ball rolling. We had this, we could bring these boys in and put them behind bars, where they belong.
Eventually Mrs. Ramos left, but Chistosito's whereabouts still hadn't been pinned down. No one knew where he was, or if they did they didn't want to tell Dee. I stopped at Rose's office on my way back to my desk in order to give him the sketch.
"Are we still on for tonight?" Rose purred from behind his desk as I entered. The inevitable blush tinged my cheeks, making me pause.
"Sir?" I replied somewhat taken aback. I checked to make sure no one was within earshot outside his office, and quietly shut the door before turning to face him.
"I was just double-checking. You never know when there's going to be a break in the case."
"There was, actually. We got a positive ID on one suspect and a sketch of the other, we need it released to the public, along with my extension." I slid the sketch across the desk to him. He didn't even glance down at it, he held me captive with his gaze for a moment. "And I do still want to keep our plans."
"Glad to hear it." He pursed his lips a little, trying not to grin.
"Dee's going out with the guys tonight. He won't be too uptight about how long I stay, uh, overtime." Berkeley smirked up at me, his eyes gleaming.
"Good, we'll actually have some time to ourselves." He put his glasses on and glanced down at the sketch. "I better call a press conference and get this to the media." I nodded and watched him dial. "I'll see you afterwards, Ryo."
"Yes, sir." I mumbled, ducking out of his office to let him focus on work. My heart was pounding at the notion of getting away with something right under Dee's nose. His back was to me, he was hunched over paperwork. I tried to even out my breath and pull myself together before I rounded him to my side of the desk. "Rose is setting up a conference with the media to release the composite sketch." I told him as I sat down, tapping and straightening files more than they needed in order to hide the slight guilty tremor in my fingers.
"Good, maybe it'll flush Chistosito out of wherever he's hiding. I've hit nothing but dead ends all afternoon." He muttered back, tossing his pen to the side and leaning back in his chair to frown at me.
"We'll find him. There's going to be movement in their community when they see their tall friend up on all the news channels." I assured him, folding my hands together, tremor still not quite under control.
"It's almost time to clock out, and nothing." Dee griped, "If any calls come in make sure to let me know and I'll be back here as soon as I can."
"Will do." I nodded. Dee stared at me for a moment, and again I was immobilized, shivers going up my spine, heart in my throat. He squinted at me a for a split second and I swore he could see right through me.
"And you're staying overtime tonight?" He asked.
"I am, I'm going to go over a few things." I licked my lips nervously. "I'm probably going to watch the press conference, wait for the calls to come in. I'll let you know if anything sounds worth following up on." He continued to stare for a few seconds longer, then shifted and stood.
"Alright, well I'm going to clock out and get a beer. I'm sick of sitting here getting frustrated over paperwork." He came around to my side of our desk and put a hand down in front of me. He leaned down over me to leave a gentle kiss on my upturned, parted lips. "I love you." He said quietly, but deeply.
"Love you." I murmured back, and he left.
Time after that seemed to crawl.
I paced impatiently in the break room, flipping through news channels on mute, checking and double-checking my phone for calls in case someone saw the sketch somehow before it aired.
Finally, the Breaking News banner flashed on a local channel, and I un-muted it. Rose was giving minor details from the steps in front of the precinct, just that there was a double homicide, we have one lead being worked on and this sketch to go on, to call the provided number. I caught myself unconsciously smiling at the sternness of his jawline, the power in his self-assured and professional demeanor. I quickly wiped it off my face and glanced toward the officers near me, who had gone quiet when they heard our chief on the TV.
Now, to wait.
I muted the TV again and headed back to my desk, hoping to catch any calls at my desk. I read over the statements from Mrs. Ramos again and listened to the silence of my desk phone.
Rose strolled back to the cluster of desks I was occupying alone. Everyone I usually worked with had gone out to the bar already. The next shift had taken their places at their own desks on the other side of the large room. We were essentially alone, the other shift was too busy with their own cases or filing paperwork as part of a punishment for excessive force, et cetera.
"Dee knows we've been meeting, doesn't he?" His footfalls behind me as he circled made me tense up.
"Of course. I haven't necessarily hid it," I tried to brush off my nerves.
"And what does he think we're doing?" I hesitated, not wanting to turn to look up at him. Dee's suspicious stares came back to me, and I felt my face heat up in embarrassment.
"I don't know, we haven't talked about it, really." I finally responded.
"He must really trust you." Rose breathed, putting a hand on my shoulder and leaning a little too near. "God knows he doesn't trust me. Not with you, anyway." He chuckled softly and gave my shoulder a squeeze. "We should get going, before time runs down on us." I let him guide me from my desk, out the back doors of the precinct and to his car. In our haste I had forgotten the file I had intended to bring home with me, but it would be fine. Rose gave me that bold grin of his and opened my car door, a hand on the small of my back as I slid into his passenger seat. It had become so familiar to me, it almost gave me the feeling of home. He took the wheel, set a hand on my knee, turned us into northbound traffic, and toward his apartment.
A/N: Thank you again for reading! (Sorry for all the confusion!)