A/N- I was going to write for Stay, but I decided against it, and decided to write this. I got a review saying that I shouldn't have wasted my time to write one of my stories, but I'll tell you something; it's not wasting my time. I love to write anything; but it was wasting your time to give me a review telling me so. I can take reviews that will provide help with my future fictions, but when you tell me that I wasted my time I just don't pay attention to you anymore. So with that said, I hope y'all like my story. Set sometime after Ryan left because Teresa was pregnant. (I totally hated that part.) Also I should probably tell you that there was no DJ in this story.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Lost In His Eyes.
Marissa Cooper sat down at the old beaten life guard station that had been untouched by anyone besides her. She couldn't tell you why this place served her comfort; maybe it was because ever since she was old enough to be out on her own she went here. It was familiar, she guessed. She really had no clue, only that she loved the place because it did so. And she defiantly needed comfort at this point. It had been two months since Ryan left, and she was still a wreck.
She shook her head; Ryan was probably with Teresa at this very moment. She hated the thought of him being with someone else, but it was out of her control now. Ryan was gone, and he wasn't coming back. She just hoped that he wouldn't forget about her. It might be overrated to ask for that, but she just hoped that one day he would return to her, and they could try again… but that would never happen.
She sighed and looked over to the small flask of vodka she brought with her. Her hands itched to reach over and take a long satisfying drink; but something was holding her back tonight and she didn't know what. She bit her lip, and grabbed the flask anyway. She needed an escape… and this was the only way she knew how.
She proceeded to put the top of the flask to her lips, when she suddenly got the nerve and put the cap back on. Her anger boiled to the top at how stupid she had become, and with a yell she threw the flask and hard as she could. She sunk down on the wall and let her tears fall, but stopped when she heard a faint, "Ouch!" in the background. She rubbed her eyes, and tried to stop the tears. She wasn't very successful though, seeing as her tears just wouldn't stop from falling.
She wasn't prepared when in the distance she saw a fairly bigger dark frame. She couldn't tell who it was, but she didn't seem to tense or anything like she normally would, seeing as she had trust problems. But she didn't; she seemed calm almost. Although when she seen who it was holding her flask, she gasped. There he was. Him. The boy in the wife beater and leather jacket. The boy that she seemed to think about every night for the past two months. There stood Ryan Atwood holding her flask that she threw, and he was starting to walk up the ramp beside her.
He didn't say one word to her, like she wasn't even there. She wondered if he could see her; but then she realized his hand was reached out passing her flask back to her. She took it and grimaced at the look in her eyes when he looked at her. She knew he didn't like her drinking, but seriously, he left… so not her fault. She rolled her eyes and dismissed his look at her and opened the cap. She was expecting he would take it from her or something, like he did in the car; but he did nothing. He let her drink it, although at the burning sensation, she sort of wished he had stopped her.
She looked over at him after she took the drink, and he looked back at her. There was something in the look, but she couldn't find out because she looked away. She was not just going to let him come back and mess her life completely up again. She wanted to be somewhat independent with herself… but she knew with him around she would always lean on him. It made her put the flask to her lips again and take an even longer gulp of the burning liquid.
He sighed looking at her… she was a mess. But he had no right to take the flask from her; he was the one who messed the relationship up anyways. He had to go and get himself in the baby mess. You could bring the kid out of Chino, but you could never exactly take the Chino luck out of the kid. He was cursed with bad luck in Chino, and in Newport. Only in Newport it seemed to be with shrimp cocktails and tuxedos, while in Chino it was more guns and condoms.
While the people back in Chino seemed to have a more open mess, people in Newport were slowly dying inside; and Ryan couldn't tell which one was worse. Looking over at Marissa, she would have to be the person that he'd ever met, that needed help. Here she was drinking again, after so long… when she had promised him that she would give it up. He figured she stopped going to therapy after the Oliver shebang… but he didn't exactly know. Although if she was going the therapy, she wasn't following their orders very good.
She was looking down and playing with her fingers like they were the most interesting thing in the world, while all she wanted was something to stop her from looking up. She refused to look up to him. She knew if she looked into his eyes she would be gone, she would get lost into them, and she couldn't do that. Not after what he had done to her… even if she might have started it with Oliver. Okay, she knew she started it with Oliver… but he didn't have to sleep with someone right after they broke up. He got himself into this mess, and she wasn't going to get in the middle of it; even if she wanted to, she dared not.
She lifted the flask up to her face again, ready to take another long gulp. He knew he had no right, but he couldn't sit here any longer and watch her drink herself to faint; so he grabbed the flask and looked at her. She had tears in her eyes, and she was looking at every part of his face besides his eyes. It was like she was scared to look into his eyes. He didn't care though, because he knew she had a right to be. She had every right to not look into his eyes, or kiss him, or tell him the truth, or anything really. They weren't even friends… they were never friends.
She looked at him, and then looked at her hands. It relieved her that he still cared about her drinking. What would her life be without his care; nothing. It may seem low to want him to care after what she did to him… but she couldn't help it.
The silence was not something to fear, neither something to envy. She hated it, because it seemed to speak the truth. Ryan and she couldn't talk anymore; not like they could before either. They had always had problems with commutation, and it bugged Marissa to no end. But now she wasn't supposed to feel this way, because there was no more 'they.' It was just Marissa and Ryan, not Ryan and Marissa. It was all confusing, but the fact was, they were no longer dating. "Why are you here?" She asked him.
He looked over at her. He was hoping he wouldn't have to explain himself; yeah right. He knew she would demand a reason for his abouts; it just never came to mind because it had been silent for a while now. "I'm back… it's, um, a long story."
"I figured," she said, taking him off guard.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It's supposed to mean that you never told me anything anyway."
He couldn't argue with this, because it was simply true. He was never a guy of many words, and she seemed to pick at him to talk. It bugged him, but it also made him slightly mad at himself because he just could open up, no matter how hard he tried. He thought he might be able to get to Marissa; but was proven wrong when he chose to sleep with Teresa. He wanted to put that all behind him now though, because the baby was no more, and as much as he was saddened by the baby dying, he was glad to be back home; Newport.
He looked back at Marissa, and seen the tears running down her face. He got on his knee and leaned in towards her, cupping her face. He gently wiped away her tears as soon as they escaped her closed eye lids. She sniffled and allowed him to pull her onto his lap. She decided that she would try and forget the past. Not saying it would be easy, because they were probably in for the hardest part of their lives, but she would try if he would.
She looked up, and he was looking at her face. They never said another word to each other, because she got lost in his eyes.
A/N – Wasn't planning for this end this way, but okay. My mind works in weird ways, sometimes I don't even know. Please review.