A/N Well this is my new story and I hope you guys like it. It isn't as crazy as Revenge of the Fools, or at least it isn't yet, but it will be just as funny. Don't worry, if you didn't find this chapter funny that's fine because there's going to be some hilarious stuff to come, and I not telling any of you. ANY OF YOU!!!! Okay yada yada yada. The usual I AM NOT J.K. ROWLING SO DO NOT TAKE ANY OF THIS MATERIAL SERIOUSLY REGARDING THE HARRY POTTER SERIES. I said something like that last time, but I can't remember what it was. Anyway, enjoy!!!
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"What the HECK am I going to do?"
Ginny said this to her roommate, Frenchy, as she stood in front of the full length mirror and frowned convulsively at the swollen mosquito bite on her cheek right next to the bridge of her nose. It was gigantic and was well long from being white and was now becoming a shade of splotchy red. And in the middle of that splatter of red was a gigantic bump. It glowed against all the black and white fabrics of the clothes scattered all over the floor and matched the red of her layers of hair.
Although the dorm room was for four people it seemed primarily occupied by Ginny because it was her stuff that was all over the floor and she was the only one who spent a long time in there except for the times when she went to classes and Hogsmeade. It was considered the headquarters of the 'matchmakers' since Ginny get together with Frenchy and contemplated how to make the guys they were dated miserable. Then again, business was getting rather low for them now that most of the guys in Hogwarts were afraid of even going near them. It was really lucky for them that they now knew because if they didn't know by now they would be in for some serious trouble. Since the last 'break-up' Ginny's torturous tactics had become even more defined and wild.
But for the moment if Ginny was to pick up another male to torture anytime soon then she was going to need to either get rid of the mutilating bite right then and there or stay in her room to avoid anyone having memories of her disgusting face.
"Hmm…mmmmmm."
Frenchy mumbled, not really paying attention the crisis at hand. Her left cheek was pressed heavily against the pillow. Even though her hazel flecked eyes were opened they weren't focusing on anything except for the split second after she had to blink before her eyes became too irritated to see.
Like Ginny, Frenchy was good looking by nature, but was like a chameleon, never looking the same. It wasn't like she was changing her face with magic, more that it had a different character with the different clothes she wore. This feature helped her dramatically because no one really recognized her so she was able to take down any guy she wanted to without him being suspicious about her motives. Her hair spilled past her shoulders looking like she had just waken up, but really in reality she hadn't brushed her hair since the year 2000. Unlike Ginny she had no visible hips and it was impossible to determine whether she was thin or chubby. Her fingernails were jagged from the biting and weren't painted. Not one single feature if standing alone would've looked good but put together for her face she looked good. The one feature that did look considerably good was her lips which looked normal until she smiled her killer smile. As much time as she spent being a seductress she didn't actually have to attitude of one. Most of the time her words were incomprehensible because she was half asleep, and she acted wild. This was the complete opposite of Ginny, who insisted on being alert and looking good the whole time. They balanced each other out, in attitudes, but that didn't mean that they were best buds. On the contrary in fact, they despised each other but had made the mistake of deciding to dorm together. Frenchy would've moved out long ago, but the only spot available was in the same dorm room as Lena, who was like a mini-me of Hermione, except not part of the Dream Team. Frenchy at least had something in common with Ginny, so it made it at least almost bearable.
Frenchy was still laying with her cheek pressed into the pillow when Ginny turned around. With her looks on the line Ginny wasn't in a very good mood, in fact, she was going into on of those Weasley tempers. Even if Frenchy was part of her male torture group it didn't stop her from being angry about her unhelpfulness. Ginny scowled at the brunette laying on the overly pillowed bed and took about two seconds to whack the cheek that wasn't buried in the pillows.
"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?!" Frenchy screeched as she jerked up and kicked her foot up instinctively not really expecting for it to hit anything, but her foot came into contact with something.
"FUCK!!!!! FUCK!!!! FUCK!!!!FUCK!!!!! DAMN, FRENCHY, I'M LUCKY I'M NOT A GUY. YOU'RE LUCKY I'M NOT A GUY! OR ELSE I'M SURE YOU'D BE A PULP RIGHT NOW!!!!"
Ginny hopped around on both feet with an expression of pure pain. Her eyes were all scrunched up and she looked like a bunny or something of the likes. Frenchy liked it when Ginny was in pain because the bunny look made her laugh her head off. Of course, not out loud, because she wasn't entirely sure if Ginny was joking about beating her to a pulp or not. So as Ginny continued her hilarious bunny hop Frenchy pulled herself into a sitting position and watched Ginny with blank eyes.
"Maybe you should do that more often, it makes you look so funny." Frenchy said in the same blank drowsy voice that was almost incomprehensible
"Ha ha, very funny."
Ginny growled and tried to come forward again but she slammed into Frenchy's dresser. It toppled over and all its contents flew around the room and covered all of Ginny's stuff. There was a collection of Fred and George's joke stuff and candy's along with two pairs of jeans that looked as if they were quilted because of all the patches, army pattern shirts in all colors, and a black hoody, along with the required robes and uniform. It was obvious that these clothes were the ones that Frenchy was going to wear all year and were only going to be kept wearable and clean by magic. If Frenchy hadn't been a witch she would've been doomed to wear the school uniform that whole time, which she basically didn't wear, even during school.
Ginny finally stopped hopping and fell over onto her bed in exhaustion, making a dramatic attempt at looking resigned. Ginny was not the kind of person who resigns though, so this look was obviously fake.
Frenchy looked at the room and performed a cleaning spell, separating Ginny's clothes and her clothes and moving her dresser back to its place. Ginny glanced over and muttered something that was inaudible before sitting up again and perfecting her hair again.
"You know that is the fourth time you've kicked me there today. I'm going to seriously have to go ask Madame Pomfrey if I'm really a girl or not because I don't know many girls who get kicked right where balls should be." There was a long pause as Ginny pulled her hair up into a ponytail, hiding the shag.
"I don't think many guys form a Man Haters Club." Frenchy pointed out as she leaned back onto her pillows, sucking on a sugar quill.
"Too true, so you have anyone new in mind?" Ginny asked idly as she took out her long list of guys they had made miserable, which was getting considerably long. She scanned the list as Frenchy was forming her answer. The list included the all famous Harry Potter who they had scared away early on by telling him how to get rid of his warts, which were in rather interesting place, in front of the whole school. Ron was also on the list but Ginny hadn't actually gone out with him obviously because she was his sister, but she had strongly endorsed the idea. Frenchy had done something truly awful to him, what Frenchy did she was yet to find out, but Ron was so afraid of Frenchy now that he wouldn't be found within the 200 yard radius around her.
Frenchy played with her tongue a bit before answering in her unpronounced voice.
"I think we should do Draco Malfoy now."
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A/N I know it ends of kind of how it ended off in revenge of the fools but that 's okay!!! I have to introduce Malfoy somehow since he isn't the main character. And I have to bring him in early on or else the story isn't as fun. Get ready for Malfoy!!! But I don't think he'll be slobbering in this one. Please review!!!!!
