For as wonderful as love is, no one ever talks about all the toil and drudgery you have to slog through to make it work. No one tells you about the hard choices you're inevitably faced with. No one mentions the sacrifices you have to make.
There is really no such thing as a labor of love. Love is the labor—the most beautiful, tumultuous, reckless labor of them all.
Shirogane, of course, knows this from experience.
When she began to write and supervise the script for the latest (and greatest; she was determined to make it so) season of Dangan Ronpa, she was struck by a startlingly obvious revelation.
In order for the killing game to function, her creations would have to die.
Crunching the numbers, at a minimum there would have to be at least five murders, which meant five victims and five perpetrators. This left ten students dead, unless of course she was feeling generous (she wasn't) and included one cut and dry suicide, lessening the casualties by one. Then again, it would be unforgivable to not include a double murder somewhere, once again bringing the minimum up to ten and putting the maximum at eleven. Many killing games ended at the sixth trial, with the great unveiling of the mastermind, and occasionally that meant one additional victim—pushing the maximum up to twelve—but there was also every possibility that the game wouldn't end there. It wasn't unheard of for the game to continue until only two students remained, just like the school regulations stated. Even if she wasn't inclined for her game to end that way, she still had to prepare for the possibility of it.
(After all, as much as she hated it, the mastermind didn't have unlimited control over their killing game. There were executives to kowtow to and audiences to please, and she would begrudgingly admit that the former occasionally knew what they were doing when it came to appeasing the latter)
A minimum of ten and a maximum of thirteen, then.
Shirogane tenderly runs her fingers over the portraits of this season's cast, tracing 'x's over each and every one of their faces as she goes.
—
When she trades out her manicured nails for a red pen, her co-writers and the higher ups go nuts. They love her plans for this season's batch of murders. She glows under the praise. She barely even minds when she is forced to hand over her outlines and scripts so the scenario teams can hash out all the details—crime scenes and evidence and slip-ups—that she does not have time to do herself. If only she could, she would plot out every detail to utmost perfection, but she has catastrophes and deadly viruses and spaceships and flashback lights and contingency plans to grapple with now.
As it happens, she also has to deal with the implementation of Ultimate Research Labs. Not a bad idea in theory, she admits, but she worries that they'll add a layer of predictability to each chapter's murder and subsequent trial. Only the least observant audience members are going to miss the giant target that appears on a student's back as soon as their designated door casts them into the limelight.
The executives won't budge, though, so she is forced to make the best out of it. She reexamines what she has written for Harukawa Maki, Ouma Kokichi, and Amami Rantarou and decides she can work with this.
For the sake of her beloved Ultimate Academy of Gifted Juveniles, and all her wonderful students, no effort is too grand.
—
Before Shirogane can process it, v3 is upon her. She is almost grateful for the opening mishap because the pure contrast between these plain, ugly teenagers (too much like herself) and the spectacular Ultimates they will become thanks to her loving hand is rapturous.
If she were to somehow become the first victim, as Akamatsu Kaede will soon plot, she thinks she would be okay with that.
Amami has always been a favorite of hers, if not for his character, then certainly for the potential sleeping within him (finally able to be met now that she is in charge). In his past seasons, he's always been well loved by everyone except perhaps the killers he's helped send to the gallows. He is calm and rational and his lips are almost always curved up into a reassuring smile, and Shirogane can't help but melt a little when it is directed her way for the first time.
The fact that most of his smiles are lies does not dissuade the feeling the slightest bit.
Amami is a perfectly cast illusion, all false neutrals and soothing pretense—perfect for Dangan Ronpa in every way except for how understated he is, and thus prone to being overshadowed by his larger than life classmates. Shirogane has noticed how he is almost always rated highly in the polls, but never ever number one, two, or even three. It's a shame, but she thinks she can remedy this. After all, for whatever reason no past writer has ever chosen to utilize Amami's unique position as a returning character, content to ride off his past success and loyal fanbase.
But what a waste!
One of Shirogane's first orders of business was to cross off Amami's title of Ultimate Adventurer with her favorite red pen. She even went so far as to personally delete the memory, only to have to burn down the rest of his mind with it because his talent had been so deeply ingrained within him that the initial treatment(s) wouldn't hold. What she'd been left with wasn't exactly a blank slate, but, as she's now seeing, a boy sifting through a field of ashes. Some of it sticks to his shaking fingertips, but most of it falls through the cracks. Not that it matters anyway since, as science will tell you, there's no way of reversing a chemical change; what goes up in flames will never be the same again.
It's better this way, though. Amami as the Ultimate Survivor shrouded in a fog of question marks is endlessly more interesting, and watching him claw through his memory loss and insecurities, desperate to reach the truth, only to realize that it's a truth he never wanted will be a perfect highlight to v3's themes. His entire character arc will also be a perfect foil to Saihara's, and just thinking about the meaningful interactions between Ouma and Amami sends a thrill up her spine.
Oh, those boys will be wonderful together. If Ouma is a liar, then Amami is certainly a lie, and they are bound to be attracted to each other like two moths set aflame. After all, a boy like Ouma, who sees through other people's lies like glass, will be the perfect confidant for poor Amami, who trusts nobody, himself least of all. Contrariwise, Amami, so heavily enveloped by the truths and lies of the killing game, will become Ouma's key (she giggles at the thought, thinking of Amami's vault) to sorting out everything he wants to know to survive.
And along the way, she thinks, sighing dreamily, they will discover that no one else understands them like they do one another. The smiles they defend themselves with, the intensity lying just beneath the surface of their jocular (Ouma) and amiable (Amami) attitudes, their shared desire to end the killing game no matter the cost—
She has to stop because Amami is eyeing her with a conspiratorial smile as he paints Akamatsu's nails. She mutters something else caustic about him under her breath, because it wouldn't do to have him realize she knows more about him than he ever will.
—
The first murder is always the most important, but due to inertia, always the most difficult to set in motion. Once the initial difficulty is surpassed, the killing game is likely to continue on with little to no intervention necessary, but the sheer amount of force required to overcome that first bump is not to be underestimated.
And yet somehow, Shirogane did.
The first motive given by Monokuma should have been enough, really. There's at least one student here who has a large enough sense of self importance to believe any price is worth the prize of escape. Seeing as the motive videos aren't due to be distributed until next chapter, Toujou is unlikely to adopt that mantle yet. That leaves Iruma, who, wrong or right, believes she and her inventions are indispensable to the rest of the world, and thus values her life above every other student present (a fact Ouma discreetly draws attention too, she notices, and feels a swell of pride). The First Blood Perk was literally made with Iruma in mind.
Of course, Iruma is also a coward, and the idea of having to survive the class trial would terrify her enough to stay her hand, at least for a chapter or two. Shirogane knows that working up the mental fortitude to actually kill someone takes some time—a luxury Team Dangan Ronpa can't afford if they want ratings to stay up. Which is why the introduction of the time limit should have made Iruma desperate enough to act.
So why won't Iruma do anything?
Shirogane thinks it probably started unraveling when Iruma failed to ask any of the appropriate questions (surprise, surprise). She was supposed to find out about the cameras' use as part of an elaborate trap. She was supposed to remember the First Blood Perk, and the time limit, and remember how afraid she really was. She was supposed to realize this was her one shot. And she was supposed to do something incredibly selfish and/or stupid, and wind up dead as a result. Whether as victim or culprit, Shirogane wasn't picky. She just needed Iruma dead.
It's inconceivable that she would make such a massive oversight concerning her characters' motivations. She convinces herself it's because she was too blinded by the immense love she feels for each and every one of them. Still a disappointing outcome, but one she can forgive herself for.
She has every contingency plan in place, including multiple avenues for the first killing. But now, she realizes that she has time for exactly none of them given how events have unfolded and that (she now recognizes) stupid time limit.
Well, that's not entirely true.
To steel herself, Shirogane runs over the truths of the reality she is currently facing:
1. Iruma is most likely not going to act, let alone kill anyone. She has no knowledge of Akamatsu and Saihara's trap, and thus is effectively useless anyway. Shirogane doesn't have time to consider why right now, she'll mull it over after the first trial. Trying to push circumstances to change this outcome is too risky, and would take too much time, so Iruma should be disregarded entirely at this point.
2. Akamatsu is definitely going to act, and is in fact in the middle of putting together some half-baked plan to kill the mastermind. Shirogane doubts it will actually work, but it's better than nothing. She can work with half-baked.
3. Akamatsu has to die this chapter. Non-debatable. Whether or not she is victimized or the culprit isn't too important.
(The reason isn't as shallow as some of the cast seem to believe—that the mastermind would never allow someone as committed to unity and cooperation to live. Akamatsu isn't a threat. She just wasn't created to be anything more than a stepping stone, meant to propel Saihara forward so he could take his place as the flawed, but dynamic protagonist she designed him to be. There's sure to be some criticism over this type of martyrdom—"why does the female lead always have to die just to spur the male main character's growth as a human being?"— but Shirogane had finished preparing herself for it when they finalized the design of the school, when it was decided the Ultimate Pianist's research lab would be among the first revealed. Of course no one will ask her about her feelings on the matter. No one will ask her about how hard it must have been to kill one of her darling creations off like that, or how heartbreaking it was to witness the carnage in person. No one will ask her about why she didn't and will never regret the decision. Because of course no one ever wants to ask the difficult questions when it comes to love.)
4. Given the above information, it is likely Akamatsu will be this chapter's killer. Whether or not this will require Shirogane's intervention is yet to be seen.
5. Amami already has the proper bait on his Survivor's Perk Monopad. Nevermind the fact it was never truly meant to get him killed—Shirogane put it there herself, and she knows he is going to take it.
6. No one besides Akamatsu, Saihara, and Amami (and possibly Ouma, depending on how much Amami has chosen to share) have knowledge of the secret door, and/or the trap, and so have no reason to go to the library. Attempting to involve them at this point is too risky, and is likely to be met with failure.
So now Shirogane is faced with a choice. Either she sacrifices Saihara, or she sacrifices Amami.
Which is really no choice at all.
—
To her credit, Shirogane waits as long as she is able in hopes of a better outcome. But the shot put ball falls, and she's out of time, so she silently says goodbye to Amami and Akamatsu as Amami's head (along with all her carefully laid plans) caves in.
—
If her reaction upon finding Amami's body seems genuine, that's because it is. Or at least, mostly. Shirogane was in too much of a rush to take what she needed and go to really take in the state she was leaving Amami in.
Oh, Amami, she thinks to herself, swallowing the desire to run to him and cradle him close to the heart that was responsible for bestowing upon him the gift of life. She wanted him to feel it continue to beat for him; to know his death wasn't at all in vain, and that she loves him all the more for it. Red is a very nice color on you.
She wants to weep for his loss and for everything he will never get to see or do. There will be no valiant struggle against his own mind as he tries to pull together the pieces of himself she'd lovingly shattered to bits. There will be no big reveal of his true talent (the one she'd picked out, just for him). And the relationships she'd painstakingly built for him, too...sunk before they got off the dock.
"Wh-what? This is a lie, right?"
Shirogane's heart clenches as soon as she hears Ouma speak out in the quiet clamor of the library. Looking at him, she thinks she catches his outer walls beginning to crumble.
"My beloved Amami-chan is dea— Oh, I mean...was kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiilled!"
There's the slightest hitch in Ouma's voice just before he switches gears—a tremor he successfully covers up with a fresh torrent of crocodile tears. Of course he's not actually concerned with semantics. It's just the quickest way for him to recover from his near slipup. For everyone else, his insensitive theatrics are more believable than the fact he may be emotionally vulnerable, and so he is rejected(a trend which will continue for the rest of this killing game).
But Shirogane knows what to look for just as well as she knows the depths of his heart: Ouma cares more than most people, and that terrifies him.
Shirogane pretends not to notice because she's not supposed to. In her mind, though, she apologizes to Ouma over and over and over again. She may not have robbed him of his life like she did Amami and Akamatsu, but that doesn't mean she didn't steal everything from him. With these two sacrifices, she's ensured he will never trust anyone again, no matter how badly he wants to. She mourns with him, for him, because even she isn't completely sure what will become of this poor lonely boy, left alone in a world where there is no one left alive who wishes to understand him.
But he is still alive, and there is no price he won't pay to keep it that way. He won't make Amami's mistake of not trusting himself enough, and he will not make Akamatsu's mistake of trusting others too much.
He will be one of Danganronpa's most enigmatic, controversial, engaging characters to date.
—
Later, after Akamatsu is nothing but a lovely smear and Shirogane has been properly chewed out by her co-workers for her choice of victim, she will review some of the investigation's footage and smile. "I'll tell you the truth," Ouma had said to Saihara and Akamatsu. "I was in the library, smashing in Amami-chan's head."
An obvious lie, objectively speaking.
She wonders if it was a lie to him, though.
—
Other than Iruma still being alive and Ouma putting some extra effort into peddling his villain persona, the next two chapters go off just as Shirogane planned. Akamatsu is transformed into the martyred, flawed, but beloved angel. Momota adopts Saihara as his sidekick, spurring the latter's continued character growth, and Maki joins them the chapter after. Toujou kills Hoshi. Shinguuji kills both Angie and Tenko (although admittedly, either of these girls could have been swapped out for Yumeno and she wouldn't have minded. She is glad it turned out this way, though).
Amami's memory lives on, probably better now than it did in his own head, which is almost touching, but it's a moot point. His story is a hermeneutic thread they can't really deliver on now. His Survivor's Perk Monopad is safely in her possession, and his Ultimate Research Lab will remain closed. They plan on implementing a rule in chapter five upon its discovery, one which states that should a lab's owner die before it is opened, their lab will be inaccessible. This, of course, is to prevent Amami's Survivor's Perk Video from being found, since Ouma would undoubtedly be able to open the vault it's hidden in.
There is one mystery concerning Amami which might still be solved, though. Namely, what on earth happened to his wax statue?
Shirogane laughs, thinking, as she so often does, poor Ouma.