Into the Light

Note and Disclaimer: Yeah, never owned M*A*S*H and never will. Father Mulcahy just seems fun to write about.

It seemed like the perfect day, even if fear of the usual silliness was always there. Although a damp April followed us everywhere, the first day of May came in like a lamb and the sun shone for the day I looked forward to, something I was anxiously anticipating for some time now. I rose from my bed, dressing quickly in the robes needed for the sacred sacrament to be performed today, and made my way to the Mess Tent, which was already crowded, with breakfast and the baptism that was about to be enacted this day.

While breakfast was being cleared out and the tables being moved out and benches being brought into rows, I watched from a corner, clenching my Bible tightly. The scene soon resembled a makeshift church and I was soon dragging the podium from another corner, Bible still in my hands, and awaited for the parents to bring the child over to me, so that the ceremony could begin. Already, I was seeing many people from the camp come along, all of them just as excited as I was to break the monotony of their daily routines. The godparents were to one side (believe it or not, Trapper and Major Houlihan), the parents held their child just outside the doors and the tent soon turned into a hush. The baptism was about to begin.

Hawkeye opened the doors to the Mess Tent, allowing the parents – a Korean mother and a soldier from a battalion nearby the camp – to being their child to me. I smiled, motioning them to come forward to begin. As they did, Colonel Blake hiccupped (from probably the day before, still recovering from the Greek Easter), some laughter attempted to be stifled and I continued to smile, trying to keep calm in welcoming this child to God's Church.

As the parents stopped before me, I asked the starting questions, as always. "What name do you give your child?"

The private spoke up for the pair, since his wife hardly knew English. "Nathanial."

"What do you ask of God's Church for your son, Nathanial?" I asked solemnly, eying Hawkeye taking a seat nearby the godparents in the front.

"Baptism, by the Grace of Christ," the private responded, smiling as he stroked his son's cheek gently and smiled when he saw his wife.

"You have asked to have your child baptized," I continued, aware of the thousands eyes on me as I nervously wiped sweat from my forehead. "In doing so, you are accepting the responsibility of training him in the practice of the faith. It will be your duty to bring him up to keep God's holy commandments as Christ taught us, by loving God and our neighbors. Do you clearly understand what you are undertaking?"

The private and his wife looked at each other lovingly. "We do," they both said, slowly so the woman could be as one unit with her husband.

I then turned to Trapper and Major Houlihan, trying so hard not to giggle under the pretenses. "Are you ready to help the parents of this child in their duty as Christian parents?" I asked, aware that Trapper might not be serious this time, although he seemed sincere in accepting his role.

"We do," Major Houlihan said rigidly, almost like she was on an Army review, her body was so straight.

"We do," Trapper echoed, folding his arms in front of him like an angel, although his eyes showed a much more mischievous side (and I knew it). "Amen to that."

I then turned back to the parents, but addressed the child now. "Nathanial, the Christian community welcomes you with great joy. In its name, I claim you for Christ our Savior by the sign of his cross. I now trace the cross on your forehead, and invite your parents and godparents to do the same. In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Ghost."

"Amen," everyone replied, watching as I took the holy water and dabbed a cross on the baby's forehead.

The service continued, of course, and soon the child was welcomed into the church fully. The parents were relieved, to say the least, and even sat in wonder as the last piece of scripture was read to the people, most surprisingly by Trapper. Hawkeye egged him on, of course, but the sentiment was still the same and I appreciated it, sitting down and watching as Trapper came to the podium and read from a piece of paper. It looked like it was torn from a book (most likely Major Burns' copy of the Bible), but Trapper read from it nonetheless.

"This is from the Gospel of Mark, chapter ten verses thirteen through sixteen," Trapper started awkwardly, but his voice started gaining more command, even in this serious place. "Ahem. 'People were bringing little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." And he took the children in his arms, placed his hands on them and blessed them.' So, bring the children on!"

Everyone laughed, even I did, and even nodded at Trapper for his kind gesture. The mass went on and soon ended with my blessing, with everyone congratulating the couple and the child on their way to the doors. As Colonel Blake started to fall asleep on Nurse Dish's shoulder, Trapper made his way out with Hawkeye and Major Houlihan was surrounded by her only admirer (Major Burns), Klinger soon came into the Mess Tent. Dressed as a nun and holding flowers, he went to the couple at the doors and handed them the bouquet, smiling and speaking words softly. It seemed touching from my position, for the private hugged Klinger and seemed to be thanking him greatly. Then, Klinger saw me and walked over, his heels from underneath the nun's outfit clicking on the floor.

I was cleaning up, hoping to get back into my tent before the true celebrations began. "Klinger! What a pleasure to see you!"

"Yes, well, Father," Klinger started, "I was wondering if I could ask a favor of you."

"I can try the best I can." I felt uncertain at that moment as I cleaned up, feeling inadequate for the position of helping Klinger already. "What ails you, my…my son?"

"Well, you see, I want to join an order," Klinger said, but not in the animated tones he usually used when he was onto something to get him out of camp. He even pulled out a rosary. "I am prepared to renounce all worldly pleasures. I am willing to work with the sick and poor. You have to listen to me, Father. I am a changed woman!"

"I can see that," I replied, a little more confidently than I felt, but also feeling very embarrassed too. "Well, Klinger, you can try Sister Theresa's or I can ask the bishop to send you to an order. However, I am sure that he would not appreciate a novice nun with hairy legs and male parts."

I blushed with saying the last part, but I turned away in time, pretending to be busy cleaning up the last of the objects. When I turned at last to look at Klinger, my hands holding the holy objects of my own order, I saw that he was contemplating something. I was sure that, after his attempt at flying out of the camp, he was thinking about what I said. Another escape plan was making its way into his mind. If he could not be a nun, he had to think of something else.

I am sure of it. What would Klinger be if not the resident escape artist?

"Well, Father," Klinger started again, but this time with more strength, "what would it cost to be a priest of the church?"

I laughed, dropping everything I held. Not caring, I put my arm around Klinger's shoulders and we walked down the aisle. Someone behind me, perhaps Igor, picked up what I dropped, but I did not care. What I cared about was helping Klinger and perhaps getting him to understand the seriousness of the matter.

"Klinger, Klinger, Klinger," I admonished. "There are many who feel the calling to be a priest, but none more so than feeling that God is asking you to. It takes a lot to come into the light of God. Now, about those robes you're wearing…"

This story is very belatedly dedicated to SamandDianeFan10 (Melanie) and her new baby. It's always a joy to have a child and more so than ever before. May the days be precious and full of laughter.