Another drabble from a while ago. Not the greatest piece of writing ever but I needed to write it, and since I have I might as well post!
Remembrance
Remus no longer tried to stifle the tears as he drank himself slowly into oblivion. So many years spent fighting his emotions, trying to forget; yet it was impossible not to remember. Now there was nothing left to do but let himself feel the pain. Such bitter irony; that the only person who would ever have cared was the very one who had torn his life apart in the first place.
Not even merely torn his life apart apart; but shattered his fading heart into a thousand tiny fragments. As if rained upon by as many shards of bloodied, broken glass; sharpened betrayal cut into him in a hundred different forms.
Yet it had not always been so. Once, he and Sirius had been close, close as lovers even. Yes, that was it: he and Sirius had been lovers from the moment their lips had first met in that dark, unforgettable corridor many years ago. And so it had continued; a secret love hidden from all. A gentle kiss in a darkened classroom, a passionate fuck in the deserted changing rooms, a calming shoulder to cry quietly onto – Remus had had it all.
And now it was gone. Sirius… gone, the betrayal cutting him sharper even than Greyback's teeth had all those years ago. James… gone. Lily… gone. It was all over now, Remus thought, as the silent tears soaked into the only picture he had left of the handsome man that had once been his. The man that now lived only as a haggard wreck, guarded eternally by those as soulless as he.
The past was all he lived for these days.