And here I am .. Again lol... I promised to write an Addek fanfiction.. cause in my heart they will always be my first ship. I really hope you will like it. I loved writing it and I just wish things would really go like this...

anyway...

Disclaimer - as I said before.. not mine. I would like to own Kate tho...

now lets get it on... and dont forget... read and review :)

The gift

Slowly the sun began to rise on the horizon, filling the sky with a warm touch of orange colour. Addison Montgomery stirred and opened her eyes as the horrible sound of the alarm clock woke her with a start.

She stretched but remained in bed tearing the covers until they reached her nose leaving only a trail of red hair to be seen.

"Hate early, must kill early" she mumbled before closing her eyes again.

Unfortunately she forgot to turn the alarm off, so she finally decided to get up. She sat up in bed and looked at the clock on her night stand. It said 4:45 am. "This day is gonna suck" she told herself when she saw the date on the alarm clock. It was October 3rd and that meant that it was Addisons Birthday.

"35" she managed to say "A great age to be divorced and alone" her voice was dripping with sarcasm before she stood up and made her way over to the bathroom.

She showered, washed her hair and tried to fully wake up which wasn't exactly easy because the clock read already 1 am when she'd finally fallen asleep last night. It sucked not to be able to sleep but Addison couldn't change it. Ever since the divorce was finalized and she had moved to the hotel she couldn't sleep properly. She missed him lying beside her. It felt weird not being able to hold him, to touch him or just hearing him snore coherently. But again this was a thing Addison couldn't change. It would never be the same again. Derek moved on and was now living with Meredith, while she was all alone hiding in a hotel room near SGH whenever she got the chance.

As she stepped out of the shower, covering her body in a large towel she headed towards the mirror. She looked at herself and raised her eyebrows. "I had better days" she mumbled noticing the dark circles underneath her eyes.

Her hand reached the make up and she tried to cover up how she was really feeling. With success. Half an hour later she did indeed look like nothing happened and she had been utterly happy and relaxed for days.

She left the bathroom and searched for some clothes to wear.

After she had dressed in a black Prada skirt with a light blue Top by Dolce and Gabbana she managed to find herself looking good enough to go to work.

She reached for the purse and the keys, took one last look in the mirror and with fast steps she left the hotel room.

Derek woke up by a loud snoring sound coming from over the left side. He turned around and saw Meredith sleeping peacefully...--- and soundfully. A few months back he thought that this was the cutest noise she could ever make, now he was annoyed as hell because her snoring meant that he hadn't had a good night's sleep in a long long time.

Slowly he got up and ran his fingers through his wavy black hair. He looked at Meredith's sleeping form and a knot started to build in his stomach. It was not only the snoring that bothered him. There were a lot of things. In the beginning of their relationship he enjoyed hanging out with her, listening to all her problems. She was young and she had brought a fresh wind into his life and for awhile, he liked it.

He liked not carrying about tomorrow and just living for the moment, he liked being able to turn his thoughts of when he was with her, enjoy their moment together and the hot sex they had. He fell in love with her so quickly but now he realized that it had never been real love, it was the feeling of something new in his life, something to let him forget all his problems and to make him forget that his wife had cheated on him, made him feel like he was in love. But in fact he had been living in denial for the past year.

The truth was he missed Addison, more than he could ever imagine. He missed the scent of her hair when she stepped out of the shower, her wavy curls still dripping wet over her shoulder. He missed the feeling of safety he had with her. He missed her smile that could easily lighten up a whole room, he missed her voice and overall he missed her touch and her sweet and sensual kisses.

He sighed. He knew his relationship with Meredith had no future and he couldn't believe that he had thrown away an 11 year marriage just because he couldn't forgive Addison for what she did and he wanted to pay her back. It still hurt him to think of his wife… with his ex best friend and he thought of the conversation they had after the divorce when Addison told him the truth about her and Mark.

For awhile he hadn't even want to see her ever again, his anger too big to realize his true feelings, his stomach turning whenever he saw her. But the fact that their confession had hurt him that much, had shown him that he still cared for her.

After a few months he'd finally forgiven her… he'd truly forgiven her and admitted to himself that his feelings for Addie would never fade.

He'd then wanted to rebuild their friendship and he'd tried everything to make her like him again but it hadn't worked. It seemed like she was scared to let him in again and he couldn't really blame her.

He made his way to the bathroom and passed the calendar hanging on Meredith's wall. Then it hit him. It was Addison's birthday. He noticed a slight heart ache when he thought of that day. He used to take her out to spend the whole day with her, surprising her with lots of things and making her smile. Except for last year when he'd forgotten her birthday and it had dawned on him only when he'd found his covers and his pillow on the couch in the living room. He'd hated himself for forgetting her birthday… their anniversary and so many dates which meant something to them, but he had been too busy with his work to even realize how their marriage had been falling apart more day by day.

And now his marriage was over for good and he started to miss her like crazy. What a mess. He had to win her back. He still loved her and he couldn't go on another day without her.

Showering and getting dressed he started to make plans on how to win Addison back. As he buttoned up his shirt and left the room he noticed Meredith who was still sleeping, the covers hanging loosely around her. "I'm so sorry" he muttered into her direction "But I have to do it… I love her, more than anything else... I really like you… but you are not her." He kissed her hair and caressed her face one last time before he left the house.

TBC

Soooo. That was the first the first part. I really hope you liked it. if you did.. please leave a review :) it makes me update a lot sooner :D