Shingeki No Kyojin – With Kirschtein
Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki No Kyojin or any of it's characters. All rights go to Hajime Isayama.
(A/N: Hi guys! It feels great to be back after... 5 MONTHS?! Aaa too long~! uwu)
This is my first SNK fic, so go easy on me :) Jeankasa.
Summary: The boys and girls dorms got infested with flees thanks to a prank from Connie and Sasha. Now they're relocating, and of course tonight of all nights Mikasa's having horrible flashbacks. Eren is no where to be found, so Jean comforts her for the night.
"So, as you all are aware," Erwin's voice boomed off the walls, "The dorms were infected with... fleas 2 nights ago, due to the..." he struggled to find the right word. "Amusement of some members in your squad."
Hanji giggled and Hechiou grimaced. "Disgusting," he muttered.
Erwin continued. "We have relocated for the time being. The girls will be staying on the left wing building of the mess hall, the boys on the right. Everything else will go as it usually did. That is all."
"And if anyone tries to else pull a prank here, they will be punished," Hechiou roared. "Severely." He looked at Connie and Sasha (who were looking everywhere else but him.)
A few minutes passed by and the members of the Survey Corps were conversing with one another. Reiner and Krista were sent out to count how many beds there were in each dorm, to make sure everyone had a place to sleep.
The experienced members of the Corps, the leaders, and the new recruits all had separate places they stayed in. Usually the most luxurious rooms went to the leaders/commanders. Down a step would be the experienced members; they had about 2 beds in each room. The new recruits' dorms weren't that great. Each gender all had to share a 1 building to sleep in. And if there weren't enough beds, they would have to figure something out.
There were only 5 girls left in the Corps and 6 boys. Reiner and Krista told their findings to Erwin. There were only 5 beds in each dorm. Worked out fine for the girls- but not for the boys.
"Levi," Erwin signaled the soldier over. Levi walked towards him.
"What is it?" he asked.
"It appears that there are only 5 beds in each dorm. There are 6 males in the current recruits," Erwin said.
"And...?" Levi asked.
Erwin cleared his throat. "You have one of the biggest bedrooms-"
"So do you," Levi reminded him.
"Yes, but..." Erwin started. "You know the recruits better than I do, It would be most wise to have one of the males stay with you for the time being."
Levi inwardly sighed. "Of course. Of course Erwin chose me," he thought. He looked around the room. "Oi, Jaeger. Get over here," demanded Levi.
Eren looked over. "H-hai!" Eren walked over to the Corpral, giving a confused look to Mikasa and Armin.
"What do you think Corpral Hechiou wants with Eren?" Armin asked.
"I don't know," Mikasa said. "I'll find out though. I don't trust Levi."
"And why is that? Because he beat Eren up to save him?" Armin smiled lightly.
Mikasa turned and gave him a scowl. "J-just kidding," Armin stated sheepishly.
The rest of the day went smoothly. Exercising, training, then dinner. All the recruits are assigned to be in their dorms at 9, lights out by 10. Mikasa layed in her bed, closed eyes.
They suddenly they shot open. Eren. She never had the chance to ask why Levi wanted Eren. In fact, she never even saw Eren after that. She started to bite the skin on her fingers, since she already bit her all her fingernails off from anxiety.
"Calm down," she told herself. "Levi's not going to do anything. Get a grip. He's fine. You'll see Eren in the morning. He's fine. Goddamnit, calm down Mikasa. He's fine. Go to sleep. He's fine." she kept reminding herself. She took a breath and tried to sleep. Shaking, she managed to fall asleep.
Only for a few hours.
(A/n: I'm editing Mikasa's flashbacks of when her parents were murdered.) Blood curtailing screams. Sharp gasps. Sharp objects. Mikasa was crying. "No... STOP!" she yelled. Try as she might , she watched the blade go right through he mother's back. The warm blood splattered on her own face. Mikasa screeched. "STOP!" she cried, her tears mixing with the blood. "Stop! Stop! Help!" she never screamed so loud, so urgent before. It made her throat become sore quickly, but she strained it even more. "STOP! MOM! DAD! HELP!" she sobbed. She screamed again more when she felt 2 strong arms twisting her own back. "STOP!" the young girl kept screaming. "Stop..!" she choked. It was the last thing she said before being brutally smacked against the head. Then everything went black.
She woke up to her hands being tied around her back. The blood and tears dried on her face and her vision was still blurry. Immense pain rushed over her skull and it hurt to speak. She's never been in so much pain. She figured her kidnappers brought her some place far away from civilization. Slowly regaining her hearing abilities, she listened in on their conversation. Something about "selling her into a trade; making money." Mikasa didn't want to listen anymore. She knew why they were after her- she was one of the last of her race, which made her valuable. Then everything happened so fast.
In her sights was boy- she's seen his face around before. He carried a knife. It swiftly found its way into one of the man's bodies. Mikasa winced. She couldn't remember his name, her mind a cloud of thoughts. Ethan? No... Eli? No... Eren. "EREN!" Mikasa shrieked. But she was too late. One of the men knocked Eren down with his elbow and stabbed him in the stomach. "Eren..." she sobbed. "Don't touch him!" she howled. "Eren! Eren! E-"
Ymir shook the girl awake. "Ackerman. Ackerman! Wake up for Christs' sake!" Mikasa screamed as she woke up.
"EREN!" she choked. Mikasa's eyes adjusted to the dark room. "What?" she asked, catching her breath.
"You were dreaming. Again," Ymir snapped. She sat by Mikasa's bedside with tired eyes.
"Oh," Mikasa swallowed. She put her hand up to her hot forehead. It came back wet. She soon realized that her whole body was sweating and shaking. Her face stung of salt water. "My apologizes. Thank you for waking me up. I'm going to get some air," Mikasa said as she lifted herself up.
"Do you need help?" Sasha asked from her bunk, concern present in her voice.
"No," Mikasa said more demanding than intended. "But thank you. I'm sorry for waking you guys up."
Whispers of "It's fine," met Mikasa's ears as she left the dorm.
She sighed and tears started streaming down her face again. She was freezing- it was the middle of December and she didn't have a coat on. Just a white t-shirt and black sweatpants that the Corps gave everyone to sleep in.
Her whimpers were quiet in the frigid winds. She needed Eren.
She needed to know he was alright- because that dream wasn't like the others she's had. Eren has never been killed in her dreams. Ever. She needed him to comfort her- to tell her that everything will be okay in time- remind her what they are fighting for. She needed to feel his warmth and security; to hear his steady breaths and feel his chest rising and falling. She ran to the boys dorm.
She carefully and quietly opened the door. Luckily this door didn't squeak.
The boys dorm seemed even darker. Only a few rays of moonlight lit the room up. Silently, she walked around the dorm. The loud snoring in the room covered up any noises she made easily. Finding him was difficult though. She didn't know what bed he slept in. Frustrated, and trying hard to cover up her crying, she found Jean. She knew it was him because of his distinctive undercut. He wasn't wearing a shirt. Luckily the room was dark enough to hide her growing blush.
"Jean," Mikasa whispered. Her voice was raspy. "Jean. Wake up," she said. Right as her frozen fingers came in contact with this skin, he opened his eyes.
"Hmm?" Jean slowly said loudly.
"Shh," Mikasa panicked, her finger covering his lips.
"M-mi-kasa?" he asked confused.
"Shh!" Mikasa looked around the room. "Quiet down," she told him.
His heartbeat started to pick up. "What are you doing in my bed?" he asked.
"Where's Eren," she demanded.
Jean was about to roll his eyes when he noticed something. "Mikasa... are you- have you been crying?" he asked worried.
"No!" she whisper-yelled. This only made her cry more.
"What's wrong?" Jean frantically asked, scooting closer to her. She scooted back.
"Nothing Jean! W-where is Eren?!" she stifled.
"I- I don't know! He never- no wait. I remember," Jean said, rubbing his face. "There weren't enough bed's in the boys dorm so one of us had to sleep in Heichou's quarters. I guess Hechiou chose Eren because he spent the most time with him?" Jean said. "I don't know the full story, but I do know that Eren would be up in that big building, probably one of the top rooms." Mikasa's arms slumped to her sides.
"Mikasa... whats wrong?" Jean asked again. "I'm going to keep asking you until you tell me."
This made Mikasa mad. Or really- she tried to get mad. She tried searching for every wrong thing Jean was possibly doing but couldn't find anything. So, she collapsed.
She hung her arms around Jean's neck and cried into his chest. "Jeez!" Jean almost screamed. "You're so fucking cold!" He shivered and held onto Mikasa's back, pulling her into the bed more. Her tears streamed down Jean's chest and stomach. He winced and held her tighter. The bed was barely big enough for them, but he managed to keep her on top of him while pulling the sheets and covers over them.
Jean didn't know what to do. As lucky as he felt to have Mikasa on him, he didn't know what to say. He felt like an idiot.
He saw this twice before. Twice before Mikasa has come in the old dorm crying, looking for Eren. God- how he envied that little punk for having her all to himself for the night. But that was only in the first month. It's been about a couple years now- why is Mikasa coming to look for Eren suddenly?
Jean ran his fingers down Mikasa's hair and back. He felt flustered, feeling her chest pressed against his. She scooted her hips on top of him, sending unnecessary pleasure throughout his body. He bit his lip and decided it would be best to place her on her side. She moved one of her legs between thighs and he blush furiously, trying to ignore it. Her arms were still wrapped around him. Jean hushed her every now and then. When she finished most of her crying, Jean spoke up.
"Mikasa. How are you feeling? Can you tell me what's wrong n-" Jean was hushed by Mikasa's grip. He swallowed.
Sighing, she figured she needed to tell him something. "I was... just worrying too much. As I always do. When that happens I'm almost guaranteed to have nightmares. But the ones tonight were... different. I want to see Eren... I need him..." Mikasa stopped momentarily. Those words almost made Jean gag. "But I need to stop craving him. I just don't know how." Mikasa looked down at Jean's abs.
He felt her gaze and cleared his throat. "Say something... anything." he thought. But nothing came to mind. It hurt him to know Mikasa had such a traumatic past, and wished he could make her happy.
Yet he can't. He probably never will get such a close connection with her as Eren does. But right now- he has her in his arms. He has this beautiful girl clinging onto him and he feels so overwhelmed with joy that he doesn't want to say anything at all. So he lightly kissed her forehead. She squealed, and he found that most adorable.
"Did you just-" but Jean cut her off.
"Listen Mikasa. I know you're... afraid-"
"I am not afraid!" she denied, pulling away from Jean. Coldness instantly fell over both of them. He watched Mikasa shiver. He sucked in his breath and continued.
"Yes. You are!" he sat up. "You're afraid of-" but he was cut off again by her.
"I'm not afraid, Jean! Of titans, or dying, or whatever else you were about to say!" she denied.
"Shut up!" he said. "Don't wake anyone up!" he yelled. Mikasa tried getting out of his bed but Jean grabbed her wrists and pinned her down.
"Oh my god, listen to me for once!" he shouted, his hot breath on her face. Mikasa stayed silent. Finally.
"You're afraid of Eren dying!" he told her. A look of confusion followed by a look of realization was plastered on her face.
"If Eren dies, you know you have no purpose. You follow him relentlessly, and even put your own life in danger to protect his all because you feel in debt to him Mikasa! But you know what? You're not the only one who's worried about Eren dying! We all are!" Jean yelled. His grip got tighter. Mikasa furrowed her brow, searching for reasons why anyone else would be afraid of that.
He closed his eyes. "We all are ordered to keep Eren safe. Even if it means us dying for him."
Many silent moments passed by them. Mikasa studied Jean for what seemed like an eternity. Jean started to let go of Mikasa's wrists but she wanted them to stay there. She wanted to feel pressure on her, somehow she liked the feeling.
She abruptly hugged Jean, making him fall over on his pillow. He moved her over on the side of him like he did earlier.
"I'm sorry," was all she could say.
Jean sighed. "Me too. For pinning you down and yelling at you. I shouldn't have done that."
Mikasa huffed. "Thank you, Jean."
Now, those words warmed his heart. He closed his eyes with a smile.
"You don't need to-" Jean started.
"Yes I do. Thank you for letting me rest here. Thank you for soothing me and opening up my eyes. I love Eren, with all my heart. But I know there are people who care for him as much as I do."
"What about you?" Jean asked.
"What do you mean?" Mikasa asked.
"Well- I know Armin cares much about you. And deep down, Eren cares about you a lot as well. But have you ever thought about who else does?"
"...Not really." she said.
"That's ridiculous. Because I do. I care and worry about you a lot, Mikasa." Jean confessed.
Mikasa swallowed. She was finally at a loss for words. "Thank you." she responded again. It was that moment when she realized she cared very much about Jean too. She trusted him enough to climb into his bed with him. It's very unlike her to do that.
He was different from Eren, but in a good way. His body was completely different; taller and more built. Jean had more muscles in different places then Eren. Their faces were completely different as well; Eren was German and Jean was French. His eyes were a clear hazel as opposed to Eren's bright teals. Jean also smelled differently. He smelled of pinewood and cinnamon. Eren had the scent of his mom- vanilla orchids. It was nostalgic for her. But Jean's scent tickled her nose and made her also feel at home; it was refreshing. She wanted more.
Mikasa scooted much more closer to Jean, her nose buried in his neck. He flinched, and she looked up.
"Sorry. It tickled," he said with a grin. For the first time tonight, Mikasa smiled. She licked her lips and got closer to Jean. He blinked, and in one quick motion, she kissed him on the lips.
"Did you just-" Jean started but Mikasa cut him off as her fingers raked across his collarbone.
"Goodnight kiss," she answered.
"Right. Goodnight kiss," Jean repeated.
For the next half hour Jean played with Mikasa's hair. His smile never dropped once, not as long as Mikasa's head was resting on his arm.
"Hey Mikasa..." Jean whispered, wondering if she was still up. Much to his surprise, she was.
"Hmm?" she asked. He stopped stroking her hair.
"Oh. I didn't think you were still up."
"What do you need?" she whispered in his ear. The proximity of her lips to his ear gave him goosebumps.
"Uh. I was... wondering..."
"Yeah Jean?"
"Can I have another goodnight kiss?" he asked. Mikasa smiled. She rose up and gave Jean a kiss. It was longer than expected, but he didn't mind at all. He placed his hand on her jaw and went deeper into the kiss. He didn't try to cover up his moan when Mikasa glided her tongue across his bottom lip. Mikasa had to admit it felt good too. She would've kept going, but she broke apart leaving Jean hungry for more.
"Ahh- I- want- I want mn-more" Jean stuttered.
Mikasa giggled. "But it's only a goodnight kiss. It's not supposed to be-" she was cut off by Jean's mouth.
"Crap," she thought. "Maybe I-" "Ahh...! J-jean," Mikasa's thoughts were distracted Jean's kisses. First they were aggressive and messy as Jean went for her lips and neck. Mikasa had to push him off a few times telling him he would leave a mark. He kept going anyway. They soon got gentler as he grew more tired, tiny kisses on her face, ears and shoulders.
Mikasa enjoyed every second of it- Jean never stopped stroking her hair as her kissed her. Between those things, Mikasa honestly never felt more relaxed since Eren used to comfort her as a child.
Jean wasn't Eren, no, he never will be. But Mikasa liked that. They were so different and she really, really liked that. She realized that she didn't need just Eren to comfort her. The thought of that sounds silly as she lay with Jean. He had a different way of calming her down- with warmth and kisses and blushes that made her giggle. She wanted to stay in his arms for the rest of the week and just forget about everything. One more soft kiss on her cheek, and another stroke of her hair; she dozed off.
Mikasa fell for Jean that night. Hard. She didn't know she could become so emotionally attracted to a person in a night, yet she did with Jean and that made her extremely happy.
Shaking and yelling greeted her that morning. As soon as she opened her eyes, every boy in the dorm was next to Jean's bed, including Eren. Jean woke up seconds after Mikasa woke up.
"Emm?" Jean asked confused of all the noise. He turned around and saw everyone.
"Um, hi?" he stated. Most of the boys rolled their eyes and got dressed. "What is everyone..." just then, he felt something smooth under his left hand. He turned around and saw Mikasa in his bed. As gorgeous as she looked in the morning sunlight, he knew why everyone was near his bed.
An especially angry titan shifter stood above the two. "What the hell?!" he screamed.
"What is it, Eren?" Jean grinned. Eren turned red.
"Why is Mikasa in your bed?" he demanded. Groans were heard from the boys behind Eren.
"Look Jaeger, I know you might be-" Mikasa cut Jean off by unconsciously placing her hand on his bare chest. Eren tensed up. Mikasa quickly took it off.
"Eren, it's not-" Then Eren cut Mikasa off.
"Is that a red spot on your neck? Why are you so close to Jean? What the hell happened last night?!" Eren roared, jealously present in his voice. Jealously.
Jean really couldn't help his smile this time. Mikasa caught his smile in the corner of her eye and tried hard- so hard not to break out in a grin with him. But she couldn't help it. They looked at each other and laughed, Mikasa unconsciously pressing herself to Jean's forehead. She forced herself to stop or else Eren was going to explode.
"Eren, look," she said sitting up, "I had... an awful nightmare last night." Her and Jean's smiles faded. "I came... looking for you," Mikasa blushed. "I asked Jean where you were and he said you are sleeping in Hechiou's quarters. Since that's at the top of the building, and I was freezing, I stayed with Jean for the night."
Eren still had anger on his face. Not as much, but it was still present. "Well... you...," Eren tried looking for a reason that she shouldn't have stayed with Kirschtein. Mikasa lifted an eyebrow.
"What. We didn't do anything Jaeger jeez," Jean rolled his eyes.
Eren looked at them. "Didn't do anything my ass!" he pointed. Mikasa and Jean looked down and blushed a scarlet red. Mikasa's sweatpants slid down more than she thought; you could clearly see her undergarments peeking out. Her right thigh was completely stuck in the middle of Jean's legs and his left arm was secured around her waist.
They fixed themselves up. "Happy?" Jean asked.
"No. Let's go Mikasa," Eren fumed, grabbing her arm.
"Okay," she said. As she followed Eren's lead she felt him push back strongly.
"Goddammit, every guy in here is getting changed! Cover your eyes!" Eren protectively yelped. Mikasa sighed but did what he said.
"Oh no! Mikasa, if you look at a bunch of guys with their shirts off, you'll instantly loose your virginity! Not like you didn't just spend the night with one," Jean teased.
Eren shot him a death glare."You're lucky Mikasa's right next to you, you jackass. If she weren't I'd be beating you til you were in a coma," Eren threatened.
Everyone finished changing and Eren yanked Mikasa out of that horrid bed. They left the dorm and she knew Eren was guiding her to the girls dorm. She heard Eren mutter various dangerous-sounding things under his breath.
They stopped in the middle of the trail. "Why? Just... why! Him, of all people. I realized you were scared, and that I was to far away. But why Jean?" Eren asked.
"You say that like it's a bad thing."
"It is!" he exclaimed.
"Why? Jean is so much more... gentle. So much more kind then you would ever think," she smiled.
Eren's heart sank. "You like him now, don't you."
"I never disliked him. I- just grew more attached. So in a way...yes." Mikasa winced.
Eren looked at her for a long while. Mikasa is very beautiful, she always was. She has an amazing body and an incredible amount of talent and devotion, any guy would be lucky to have her. More than lucky. Who she chooses to be with- whoever that lucky bastard will be, Eren will probably always envy. Honestly, if Mikasa wasn't his adopted sister he'd be all over her. The thought gave him goosebumps.
"Eren?" Mikasa asked.
Eren sighed and pursed his lips. "I... really overreacted back there. I'm sorry," he apologized. "It's just... weird. I guess. Seeing you with another guy. If you like Jean, I can try to get along with him while you guys are dating."
Mikasa gasped. "Dating...? Um, we're not dating Eren. Sure, we got closer last night..."
"Literally..." Eren thought.
"And I know Jean kinda likes me, but no. Plus, how can I have time for a boyfriend when I need to manage your ass 24/7?" she joked.
"Mikasa! Watch your language!" Eren blurted out instinctively.
Mikasa grinned. Eren grinned with her. It was the first time they truly had a nice moment together in years.
Mikasa walked past Eren to the girls dorm. He watched her. She had more sway in her step which he found very attractive.
"Hmm." He thought. "She cusses now, jokes around with me, and even seems a bit more sarsactic," Maybe her hanging out with Kirschtein wasn't such a bad thing after all.
(A/N: Annnnd there you go! I spent literal hours on this fic, so it mean be a lot if you could review~! What you liked, what you didn't like, etc. Thank you sooo much! 3 :)
-Jillian