Disclaimer: I don't own Card Captor Sakura or any of the characters within the series. I do however claim creative rights to the plot ideas in this story.
Tags: Sakura + Syaoran, romance, Sakura POV, A/U, one-shot
Author's Notes: This fic stemmed from a line in the song California in December by Transistor Radio, the chorus of which I have included at the opening of the fic. Written in class, with little to no editing. The plot is so stereotypical and sappy, but whatever. I don't care too much since I did this out of fun and boredom.
Edits: Thanks to hamxham for pointing out a mistake in the colour of Sakura's eyes. I wrote most of this before picking exactly which anime/manga to match it to, and so forgot to change it... Also changed the other mistake in eye colour. It's been a while.
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Lavender Rain
And now it's coming down,
Harder than it's ever been before
I guess the angels must be crying
It feels like rain
An old woman once told me that raindrops were the tears of angels. I had skipped school that day and was hiding under the great oak tree at the heart of the park, crying over my first broken heart, when a steady but soft rainstorm built up. The elder had appeared from amongst the mist-like haze that the rain created. As if on a Sunday stroll, she held a calm, even pace in my direction, humming the chorus to a traditional folksong. Her soft words penetrated deep into my soul. "You see, guardian angels who concern themselves too much with those whom they have sworn to protect become saddened by their inability to help more," she explained. "And as time wears on, they lose their wings and fall to the earth, becoming like the very mortals they cared so much about. Those angels gave up their immortality in order to serve their purpose closer to those whom they care about. They realized that this feeling was no less than love."
Back in the classroom, the professor continued his passionate lecture on the structure of our country's economic system, drawing even the least interested of students into his world of markets and trade and competition. The rain crashed down heavily from above, painted the scenery with shades of gray. It wasn't much like me to daydream, but…
Him.
I narrowed my eyes slightly at the mere thought of him, trying to focus my attention out the window and on the men and women busily crossing the streets with their umbrellas in hand. The downpour created a soft and steady beat upon the university building, rhythmically playing out an orchestrated piece of nature that no one ever stopped to listen to. A slow growing rustle of bags and zipper interrupted the melody and I snapped my attention back to the front of the classroom just in time to hear the teacher announce that the class was over. Students began the migration towards the doors, eagerly wanting to move on to their next class of the day. As I followed the crowd and inched through the hallway, I met a somewhat unwelcome surprise. I saw him. We locked eyes. And before I knew it, I was up against a wall.
He cornered me. Literally.
Feeling as like a deer caught in headlights, I gripped my bag in my hands and looked defiantly back at him. Green against brown, crashing together in an invisible, wordless battle of unspoken thoughts and emotions. His strong arms were on either side of me, blocking off all escape routes and focusing the attention between us. The wall I was pressed back against was cool and smooth to the touch and I suddenly wished that I could just mesh into it.
"I need an answer," he finally stated, after some hesitance. The words did not demand a reply and were not nearly as effective as he probably hoped. Instead, his voice was soft and held an undertone that hinted at underlying insecurities. For the few short days I had known him, he had never been one to take action into his own hands. Anyone else would have found it easy to brush him off and walk away, but in my predicament the feat seemed nearly impossible. Within the week, the beginnings of infatuation had spiraled unexplainably out of control. I drew in a deep breath and pushed him aside with a false smile.
"Sorry, I gotta go," I replied simply. With that, I slung my bag over one shoulder and set off at a fast-paced walk towards the building exit. I could hear him following me, struggling to keep up. His footsteps made an uneven pattering sound, almost like that of the rain outside. I wanted to lose him. He called after me and I pretended not hear, instead quickening my pace into a run and bursting through the double doors.
Ever since I moved onto campus, I found the nearby forest to comforting and soothing. I would often go there in between classes just to sit and relax. Maybe it was because the place reminded me of the very forest that I grew up around, that I would turn to in times of disappointment and heartbreak. There was an innate feeling of calmness among the trees, quiet and away from the bustling city.
And that was where I turned. I was certain that I knew the forest better than anyone, and I could easily lose the boy there. As I broke past the outer border, all was silent aside from the pounding of my feet and the drip-drop of rain upon tree leaves. Long minutes passed and I believed that I had lost him when something tackled me to the ground. A tangle of limbs crashed onto the moist forest floor followed by the sound of two bodies panting for air.
"I need an answer," he repeated in between gasps of air. I struggled to get to my feet but he caught me in a startling yet warming bear hug, pulling me back down to sit between his legs. He was still breathing heavily when he pressed his face to my back, and I could feel my face begin to get warm. I hadn't realized before, but he smelled of sweet lavender after summer rains. When he spoke again, his voice was hoarse and unsteady. "Sakura," he began slowly. "I can't explain, but it's important to me. I need to know. Do you feel the same way about me?"
It was the same way he had asked the question two days ago. Speechless, I searched my mind for words, for an answer of some sort. "Syaoran, I don't know yet. I… I need some time to think about it."
"I sacrificed so much to come see you, to meet you," he whispered next to my ear. "You must have felt it when we first met, right?"
"I don't know. I can't do this, I'm sorry." Emotions welled up on the inside and I struggled to keep them hidden away. Above us, the rain continued to fall. "I won't let myself be taken as a fool again. A month ago, I decided that would be the last time."
There was a long silence as he stayed still just holding me. The sweet, brown-haired boy who had appeared mysteriously about one week ago seemed like a godsend to help talk my mind off my most recent breakup but this was happening all too fast. "I hate seeing you hurting like this," he mumbled. "I-I think I… love you." His voice wavered this time and I turned my head slightly to try to get a look at him. It almost looked as if he were crying, but the raindrops made it hard to tell.
I couldn't reply. We sat there for some time under the sheltering oak trees, listening to the song of the rain in each other's arms. I savored that unique lavender scent.
And in the end, we were just a couple of kids wanting to know what love is.
