DAYLEE
I open the big metal doors. I take two steps and I already feel sweat on my forehead. I feel like everybody is staring at me, but really they are staring at every one new. I'm looking for my best friend, Cody, and I can't find, so I'm freaking out. A walk up slowly to a desk that has school supplies all over it. I stare at the four dull pencils while I am waiting for the lady to respond. Finally she said, "Name please?" I didn't respond because I was too distracted by the dull pencils. I was so nervous.
"Hello?" said the lady at the desk.
"Huh? Oh, I'm sorry. Um… Daylee Sanders. " I said very idiotically.
The lady just looked down at her computer with her big glasses. She's typing something and all you can her are the keys on the keyboard. Then she looks up at me.
"Daylee Sanders… Ninth Grade, age 14?" she asked me.
"Yes." I said. I swallowed my spit in my throat very nervously.
"Here's your schedule, Daylee. Your first class is Math in room 112. You'll find your away around after that."
"Thank you, mam." I said.
I walk slowly to math. I can't find Cody anywhere. I'm a freshman and this is my first day of school. Cody and I are next door neighbors and when I went to his house this morning, his mom said he already left, and I can't find him!
I'm walking and I'm just thinking of how my life in high school is hopefully going to be amazing. Then I felt someone touch my shoulder. I turned around fast and it was Cody. I look into his big brown eyes that fulfill his entire face. His blonde hair flows across his face. His blue jacket with jeans really stands out for him.
"Where were you this morning? I have been looking for you everywhere today!" Cody said while laughing.
"Back at you, Cody." I said laughing as well.
We started walking down the hall together until I said, "Let me see your schedule."
"Why?"
"Just give it to me." I said.
I'm looking at his schedule and I see that we have no classes together.
"We have no classes together." I said.
"Really? Dude, that seriously stinks, but that's okay. We will hang out every day after school. I swear." Cody said.
We both laugh then went to our classes.
I sit down on the cold hard seats. I rest my back on the tile ground and look up at the teacher who isn't even facing the class. Finally he turns around. He is very young and has short dark brown hair and blue eyes. He is quite tall. He grabs a blue expo marker and starts writing on the white board very softly. He writes "a + b * Y=". I stare at it very carefully. He clears his throat and says, "Hello class. My name is Mr. Short. Welcome to math class."
I heard kids in the background chucking at his name. Then one yells out, "You have such a stupid name! You are tall and your name is "Short". You must be stupid as well!" All I thought was how cruel that was. Why would kids be so disrespectful to their teacher? They don't even know him, he could be an awesome teacher!
"Yes, yes. Now kids settle down. Look at the problem I wrote on the board. Can anyone solve it for me?" Mr. Short asked.
He seemed so calm. That would have seriously hurt my feeling. Then again, they're just words. Words don't really hurt, right?
"Anyone?" he asked very displeased.
Nobody responded. I knew the answer but I didn't want to sound like a nerd. I mean, it is my first day of high school.
"Well… a + b is very simple. Substitute "a" with…"
Yeah, yeah I already know. Heard this last year! I just stared at the clock and only a second has past, but it felt more so of one hour! Finally the bell rings. I get up and my butt hurts from sitting in the hard wooden chairs for 45 minutes. I start to get out of the classroom and two girls yell, "Hey new girl! Daylee, right? Come here!"
I walk to them concerned. What would they want with me?
"Yes…?" I asked concerned.
"My name is Angela, and this is Courtney and Cassidy." Angela said pointing to two other girls.
"My name is Daylee." I said sounded very idiotic.
"We know who you are. My girls and I were talking and we want you to be a part of our group. Want to hang out after school?" Angela asked.
Oh my gosh! I am already making new friends on my first day! Wait, I wouldn't be able to hang out because I already promised Cody.
"That would be great, Angela, but, I'm sorry but I already have plans."
"This is a one time opportunity. It's today or never. Make up your mind." Cassidy said.
"Cassidy! We talked about this! I do the talking! Anyways… she's right. Now or never." Angela said.
"I'm really sorry you guys, but I can't. I already have plans." I said apologetically.
"Fine, but you will regret it." Angela said.
My first day of high school was done. No new friends, but that's okay. I have Cody. School wasn't bad. Not as bad as I thought it would be. I'm waiting for Cody outside the building. Everyone walks out and stares at me, literally this time. I have no idea why but it's weird. Then I saw Cody come out and walks over to me.
"Ready?" I asked.
"Yeah."
We started walking back to our homes quietly. It must have been the quietest walk we have ever done.
CODY
Daylee and I are walking home and it's the quietest walk we have ever done. I know why it is because I'm keeping something from her. I don't want to tell her thought because it would destroy her entire world, and I don't want that. She's my best friend.
"So when I walked out of school today, every one was staring at me, it was weird. Do you know why?' Daylee asked.
"Honestly Daylee, I don't think anybody was really staring at you." I lied.
"No, I know they were. I wasn't imagining it this time Cody!"
"You probably were. You tend to do that." I lied, again.
"Whatever." she said upset.
I am just staring at the trees now. Each leave falls silently on the ground. Then the wind comes and all the leaves crash to ground. It reminds me of something that happened to me when I was a child.
It was a mid- summer day. It was the summer before I had to go to school for the first time. My dad and I were playing outside and a huge wind came. All the leaves crashed onto the ground. My dad and I raked them up into a huge pile and we kept jumping into the leaves so happily like it was the end.
That was one of the best memories of my dad and I. That was the summer before my dad died. I miss him a lot. I love fall just for that reason.
"Look, I'm sorry. I had no right to say that. If people were staring at you, it would probably be because you're so beautiful and they're jealous." I said.
Daylee smiled with her big blue eyes and long blonde hair. She has such fair skin it makes her look gorgeous. We got to our houses and decided to go to Daylee's today. I step onto two cement stairs that leads to her porch. Daylee grabs the handle to her big door that has a diamond window on it and opens the door. We both step in and Daylee shouts, "Mom! I'm home and Cody's here!"
We go up to her poster decorated room. She loves Taylor Swift, so she has a lot of her posters plastered on her pink wall. I sit down on her bed and the mattress sinks in. I grab one of her animal pillows and rest it on my lap.
"So how did you like your first day of high school?" I asked her.
"Horrible, but, not as bad as I thought it would be." Daylee told me.
"Why so bad though?" I asked her curiously.
"Well these girls wanted me to be a part of their "group" and hang out with them today. I told them I can't because I have plans and they said I would be sorry." she said.
That was kind of peculiar to me. That's weird that those girls would say that, but that's what girls do I guess.
"It's alright Daylee. They'll get over it and leave you alone." I said meaning it.
"You sure?"
"Positive." I told her.
The next day Daylee and I went to school positively. I didn't really want to be seen with her in school for a certain reason. We walked in and went our different ways.
DAYLEE
Cody doesn't talk to me in school anymore. I have no idea why. He could at least sit with me at lunch so I had a friend to talk to. I'm walking to my class and everyone is staring at me. Some people are chuckling under their sleeve, and other people are just glaring at me and shaking their heads. I walk slowly to the classroom. There are 20 people in the class, so that's 40 eyes staring at me. I sit on my hard, cold seat. I just look at my desk and the littlest thing entertained me. I stare at an eraser shedding for the entire class. If I lift my head up, everyone is staring at me.
At the end of the class I walk past people and they laugh. I grabbed someone's shoulder and asked, "Why is everyone laughing at me? What's so funny?"
The girl laughed, and when she was done she said, "You. You are a disgrace and a loser."
"I don't get it. What did I do?"
"Hahaha, slut!" Somebody said to me.
I just felt like shoving my face into my arms. I was so hurt. Everyone was calling me names, but it will go away soon.
Two Years Later…
Cody and I don't talk anymore and I don't know why. I think it's because he got mad at me. I mean, I flipped out at him two years ago, but we both apologized. I don't know why. I think he hates me.
Once I said those words in my head, it didn't seem right, but it's true. I grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil. I start to write "Cody hates me" on the piece of paper. The pencil wrote on the paper very smoothly. I'm going to keep that piece of paper for the rest of my life. I wish he would tell me why he hates me.
I grab my black hair dye and start dying my hair. I'm dying it fully black. About four hours later it was done. It looked good, but not me, but everybody hates me so what's the difference? I start playing with my hair and then I look over to the scissors on the counter. I grab them and put my fingers through the cold medal holes. I start to cut my hair. The shard medal blades cut smoothly in my hair. I had choppy layers on top with my hair thinned out at the bottom with no layers. I stare at my hair for a few seconds. I decided to get more hair dye and dye it a little more.
I go a drawer in my house. There was tons of hair dye from my older brother who died his hair a lot. He's in the army right now, so he wouldn't mind.
There was blue, green, red, black, and even yellow. I grabbed the blue and headed back to the bathroom. I dyed my hair a light blue at the bottom where it is thinned out. Now I like it. I look at the clock and I have one hour until I have to go to school. I grab eyeliner and did my make-up. It's very dark and I put red lipstick on as well. I check my phone and I still have 45 minutes. I really wish I didn't have to go to school. Somebody has been spending rumors about me and every one is bullying me. Yesterday, somebody even locked me in the boiler room. I hate high school.
I have tons of friends in high school. I love it, but I've hurt feelings of my old friends getting new friends. I hurt Daylee.
I'm writing all of this down a piece of paper to keep with me at all times. It reminds me of the old me. I look at my phone and it is time to go to school. I'm walking and there is this girl in front of me. I don't know who she is, but she's walking towards our school, but maybe she isn't a student.
A little while after, I'm heading towards first period. I see that same girl heading in front of me heading to math. She has black hair and choppy layers at the top, and thinned out at the bottom with a light blue. She's wearing black laced tights and a very dark velvet color dress. She was very dark.
I race up to her and touch her shoulder.
"Hi, my name is Cody. You must be new. What's your name?" I told the girl.
She turns around and I know that face. I imagine it under the make-up and I know who it is.
"Daylee!?"
She turned back around and went to her class. She didn't say one word to me. Not one.
That never happens. I know that we haven't talked in two years, and it's my fault, but she never doesn't say a word to me, even if she's mad.
I'm heading to math right now and every one stares at me, and chuckles and laughs.
"You have no life! You're such a slut!" someone shouted
"Go kill yourself!" another person shouted. It never ends.
I'm still walking and someone comes up behind me and pushes me into a wall.
Every one laughs.
I run to the bathroom and skip first period. I start crying and sobbing. I look over at my back pack, I have my knife in there. I open it up and grab the knife. I take off all my bracelets on my wrist. You can see all the scars that I made myself. Yes, I cut myself, it takes away all the pain.
I put the hot medal into my wrist. Blood starts dripping down my wrist. After three or four cuts, I put the knife back in my bag.
I finally got courage and came out of the bathroom second period. When I came out every one was silent. Then, some obnoxious kid shouted, "Were you doing another pregnancy test?" every one laughs and they keep on laughing.
I ran out of the building as fast as I could. I don't want to go to school, I don't want to go home. I want to be away from every thing. While I'm running I hear Cody shout, "Daylee, wait!" but I didn't. I knew I had to come back, because this was only the beginning.
I sit down on a rock by the ocean. I'm breathing quit heavily because of me running. I take a deep sigh and listen to the crashing sounds of the waves.
I stare into the ocean. There are big waves today, and every wave is bigger. The crashing sounds make me feel calm and peaceful. This is where I go when I am upset, it makes me feel better about myself.
While I am thinking about all of those thoughts, I hear a catchy ring tone. It was my phone. I look at my phone and I got a text message, but it is from restricted. The text said, "You need to lose A LOT of weight lol. You're fat. You're new nickname should be fat ass."
What? I'm fat now. I walk back home and I got another text message. This one said, "Hey fatty. I have two whole pans of cake left. Want it? Oh never mind, you'll eat it all in two seconds and get mad because there is no more."
I walk up into my room and look at myself in the mirror. I take my shirt off and I'm just in my bra and shorts. I turn to the side and back to the front. I keep doing that for maybe five minutes. I guess maybe I need to lose a little late. I mean, they are kind of right, I am a little fat.
I plop down onto my bed and open my journal. I see pictures of Cody and I when we were in fifth grade. We were so cute, we never thought our friendship was going to end, but we were wrong. I flip through a couple more pages and see a picture of my big brother, Jackson, and I. Jackson was about in the same grade as I am (junior) and I was in the third grade. I miss him. I haven't seen him in a year.
CODY
Why do kids have to be so mean? Daylee didn't do any of that stuff. I mean, I guess it's sort of my fault, but they didn't have to take it that far. I probably should tell what exactly happened, huh?
It was two years ago. It was Daylee and I's first day of high school. We didn't have any classes together or our lunch period. I was sitting at the lunch table when the most popular guys in school come over. They said I could be a part of their group if I did something. They told me to spread one little rumor about Daylee. I didn't think it was going to get this bad. I'm very popular now, but I wish I could take that all back. I don't even recognize her anymore. She's not herself because of me. I'm going to try to talk to her tonight.
I'm walking home from school and I go inside my house. I stop half way up the stairs and think to myself, should I actually go to her house and talk to her? What if she isn't home? I don't know what to do!
I walk into my room and opened my window. Daylee's window to her room is across from mine, maybe we can talk like this, like we used too.
"Daylee? Are you home?" I asked loudly.
It was silent for a few seconds. Then her window opened.
"What do you want Cody?" she asked.
"I need to talk to you. Can I come over? It's important." I asked trying to not look suspicious.
There is a long pause. I'm waiting for her to respond.
"Fine, but not for long." she said.
Yes! She agreed! Hopefully I can do this.
"Alright. Be there is a sec!" I said excited.
I sprint down my stairs and scream, "Mom! Going to Daylee's house!" and run out the door.
I go up to her steps and knock on the wooden door very softly. While I am waiting for a response, I am thinking that nothing looks different. Even the trees are the same. Then I hear a creek from the door. I snap my head around to the door. Daylee opened it.
"Come on in." she said.
I still can't believe she looks so different. She looks "emo" now. I'm sure her room is a little different too. I know she still loves Taylor Swift. I stare into her eyes for a little while. They were covered in eye liner. I look deeply down and I still see those beautiful big blue eyes.
We walk slowly up to her room. I was actually kind of afraid. I mean, I haven't seen her in two years and she's a completely different person now. Daylee opens her door and there it is. I should have seen this coming. No Taylor Swift posters anywhere, all there was was these rock band posters.
Why is Cody suddenly talking to me again? I am really confused but I am letting him in my house right now. I sit down on my bed and get all comfy. I play with my lip piercing a little bit with my tongue. I can feel the point of the piercing again my tongue. The piercing is right below my lip.
A few seconds has pasted it is an awkward silence. Finally, I speak up and said, "So what do you want?"
"Well… um…" Cody said stuttering.
Something beeped. It sounds like a ring tone for a phone. Cody reached down into his pocket. He has skinny jeans on so it takes him a while to get his phone out. He grabs his phone and flips it open.
"Well I will be right back, I need to use the bathroom." I said.
I go downstairs and open a drawer. I grab my notebook that I wrote "I hate Cody" in. I look over at my pencil on the shiny counter that you can't miss. I write very smoothly and softly on the paper and write, "I think Cody and I are going to be friends again."
I close my notebook and put it back into the drawer. I walk back up to my room and open the door. It made a very squeaky sound but it open very smoothly.
"I'm back." I said to Cody.
He didn't say anything for a while than he said.
"Great, but I have to go. Sorry. Goodbye." he said.
And that was it, he was gone. He never even said what he wanted to say to me.
I can't believe I just did that, but I need to be popular! When she went into the bathroom, I got a text message… from the most popular guy in school, Brandon. It said, go to Daylee's house and take something. Like something that would get another rumor started, something… embarrassing. If you don't do it you're out of the group
I grabbed her diary. It says all of her secrets in it and I stole it. We all have to make sacrifices to be popular… right?
I walk up stairs into my room and plop onto my blue bed. I look around my room, which is white, and think of how boring it is. I get that out of my mind and grab my phone. I flip it open and start to text Brandon.
Hey. I grabbed Daylee's diary. Hahaha im reading it now. Txt u later to tell u what I find.
I flip open her diary and start reading. There is nothing very interesting until I found one specific page that said, "Cody hates me." That was the only thing about me in the entire journal. I was hurt.
This was the entire page.
Cody hates me. He doesn't talk to me anymore, he hates me. I don't know what I did, but I want to find out. Everybody is so mean to me. I need another dose of my drugs.
Bingo. Found it. Daylee has to take shots because of a certain reason, but it's a prescription. I can make this sound like she's taking drugs.
I text Brandon and told him. He texted back,
Hahahahaha that's great! I will do something tomorrow.
That was it. It is done. I did something horrible and now I can't take it back. I am a horrible friend and person.
DAYLEE
Beep beep beep beep
I open my eyes and all I can see is blur. Then my eyes are fixing themselves and I can see clear now. I look at the clock and it says it's 7:00 a.m. I force myself up out of bed and get dressed, do my makeup and hair, etc. Then I go out the door.
I'm walking to school and I walk past Cody's house and I just think about yesterday. I get that all out of my mind and go to school for the day.
While I'm walking everyone is staring at me and calling me names. I'm so confused.
I start to walk to math and everyone is staring at me like an owl. I walk in the classroom and slowly shrink into my seat.
After math I go into the bathroom. There was Angela and her crew. They go by Angels now.
"HAHAHAHA! Hey slut, do you need another shot?" Angela said.
"What? What are you talking about?" I ask holding back the tears.
Cassidy looks over at Angela and says, "Aw, I guess this little emo slut hasn't heard yet."
"Heard what!" I scream.
The Angels all look and whisper to each other. Angela grabs her cell phone and shows me a text. It says:
Words from Daylee's diary:
"I need another dose of my drugs"
LOL this emo slut is a fucking druggy AND a fat ass gymnast! Quit gymnastics while u r ahead, Daylee. LOL
Automatically my eyes filled up with tears. I'm not a druggy, I have to take shots because it's my prescription! We live in Florida and I'm allergic to fire ants, I have to take shots in my legs because I could end up dying. Who spread this? I'm a high level gymnast…
"Aw, she's crying. Maybe she'll cut herself again." Angels said.
I just ran off sobbing. While I'm running in the hallway I hear people laughing at me. I run into the boiler room.
CODY
I shouldn't have done this. I just need to be popular. I can't handle being a loser. But neither can Daylee… What have I done?! I got myself into a huge mess. Shit. I need to stop this. Yes, I will. I'm done with Brandon's games
I slowly walk to Brandon's locker and shooed the people around him away.
"Hey, what's your problem?" he said.
"I'm done with your games Brandon. You said I would be popular two years ago. People still don't know who I am. I'm hurting Daylee and I'm sick of it. I… I just can't do this anymore." I said to him hardly breathing.
"Whoa. Hold up there bro. It's ok. You are just really stressed right now. Trust me, people do know who you are. They think you are cool because you hang out with me. I'm not playing any games. Now brush that stress of your shoulder and let's go have lunch." Brandon said to me.
I took a deep breath. I will give him one last chance.
"Ok. Let's go."
"Good decision." He said.
DAYLEE
My eyes are all puffy from crying. I whipped my tears off and went back out into the hallway. There was no one there so I ran to the doors. I crashed right through those medal doors and ran home. It was about 5 o' clock.
"Where have you been Daylee Lynn?" My mom asked.
I could tell by her voice she's drinking again. She's drunk. I can also tell that by her voice. My dad left my family about three months ago. It's been really hard on my mom. So, she's been drinking, and even using my prescription shots to "forget" about my dad. It's not working. It's destroying her.
"I was working on a school project. Mom, I know you are drinking again." I said to her.
"That's not of your business what I'm drinking or not drinking! Stay out of it you stupid slut! God... you are such a stupid child!" she screamed at me.
Whoa, this is getting really unusual. She never yells at me like this. It's getting way out of hand. I look down at the blue carpet. Then I look up at her and say calmly, "Mom… Really, please stop drinking. It's getting out of hand. You are going to end up hurting yourself or someone else."
"DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO YOU STUPID DAMN CHILD!" she screamed.
Then she punched me. Right in the face. It hurt like hell. It was bad enough I was getting bullied at school. Now I'm getting bullied at home. I can't get away from it.
"Mom! Stop it!" I yell as an initial response.
She grabbed a belt and grabbed me buy my hand and pulled me into another room where the neighbors can't see. She whipped me with the belt about 10 times. Blood dripped down my arm.
CODY
Beep beep beep. Time to go to school! I hope every thing goes right today.
I walk to school and see Brandon in the hallway.
"Hey dude." I said.
"Hey," he chuckled a little bit than said afterwards "Did you hear what happened to Daylee last night?' he said then chuckled even more.
"No… what happened?" I asked very concerned.
Brandon got his one last chuckle out. "Well, the Angels stopped by at Daylee's house last night to tell her she needs to eat less. Well, when they knocked on her door no one answered, and they knew she was home because they followed her. They went into her back yard to look through a window. When they looked through… they saw Daylee's mom punch her!" Brandon laughs, then he controls himself, "Her mom called her a slut as well! I think Daylee is finally getting what she deserves! She's learning the truth. Anyways, Angela told me her mom dragged her off into another room that they can't see. They think her mom saw them. Angela heard that Daylee quit gymnastics too!"
I swear my heart stopped pounding. Sweat is dripping down my face. Her mom would never hit her. No. It must be a lie. I bet she won't even come in with a black eye.
"Cody?" Brandon asked because I didn't say anything.
"Huh? Oh, yeah… Ha ha… funny…" I said.
Brandon shook his head then said, "See you at lunch dude."
I stared at the door. Waiting for Daylee to come in. It was five minutes before first period and she hasn't come in yet. Then I hear medal doors open. She walked in slowly with dark sunglasses on. Shit. That's a sign of someone hiding a black eye. I slowly walk up to her. Stared at her, and then pulled her sunglasses off.
"HEY!" she screamed in anger.
There it was, a huge black eye. Blue, purple, and green surrounded her entire eye .It was the biggest black eye I've ever seen.
"Is it true?" I asked sharply.
She didn't answer. She just stared.
"Answer me!" I screamed almost crying. "Please Daylee, I want to know."
She took a huge breath then asked, "Is what true?" Her voice was so sharp, like she wanted to know an answer.
"About your mom… The Angels said she hit you then dragged you in another room. Is it true?" I said very softly.
"How did they know about that!? What were they doing at my house?" She very sharp this time, demanding an answer.
"|Is it true!?" I said sharply.
"Yes… But it is none of your business! Stay out of it!" she screamed.
I looked directly up at her. She's extremely tall. She's about 6'1. I've always been shorter than her.
We stared at each other for a while. Then she walked away, not wanting to be late for first period. I just stood there, in the hallway, wishing I could go back in time because it's my entire fault. Everything. Everything is my fault.
Chapter 12 Daylee
Why can't people realize that some people don't want to talk about stuff? Don't you agree with me? I mean, it bothers me so much! My mom isn't going to turn into a big, mean, pothead mother! I know she knows better than to do that!
I'm confused about Cody. First he wants to be my friend again, then he changed his mind, now he cares about me? This kid's crazy.
I put down my pencil from what I just wrote. I have like, five "diary" journals, it's kind of funny.
I get up and go lay down on my bed. I look around my room covered in Sleeping With Sirens and All Time Low posters. Those are my two favorite bands. While I'm looking at them, it makes me want to listen to music. I get up from my bed and go to a wooden desk that is plastered with paper and journals. I open the first drawer on the right and grab my iPod and headphones. I walk back over to my bed and get comfy, and then I escape the world with music.
My eyes are slowly closing from the wonderful sound of music. The music is so good, it gives me goose bumps. Right when I am about to escape the world entirely, I hear stomping from the stairs.
I feel the little fear in my stomach and I rip my headphones out of my ears. The stomping from the stairs comes closer and closer to my room. Then all of a sudden, my door swings open.
"You stupid child! You were supposed to buy my non fat yogurt, not low fat! What are you trying to do? Make me fat?" my mom screamed at me.
"Sorry, Mom." I said very quietly, almost mumbling.
"Don't you give me attitude, young lady! Since you gave me attitude, you don't dinner for a week!" my mom said, almost throwing up from the beer.
"Mom!" I screamed at her angrily.
"I don't want to hear any complaining! I will teach you a lesson after I eat my dinner, since you don't get any!"
My mom walked out of my room and slammed my door. What has she turned into? She's turning into a monster!
I hear someone yelling from outside of my window. I walk over to my window and I see Cody from the other side in his window.
"Daylee… I have to tell you the truth."
.