Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note or the Mighty Boosh or any of their associated characters and Fictional locations.

To say Ryuk was bored would be an outrageous understatement. Ever since Light had kicked the bucket he had had no entertainment, no surprises and worst of all no apples. Across the past few years he had thrown down the extra notebook he had bribed the Shinigami King for (costing him over a dozen of his precious apples) numerous times but each time someone picked it up who didn't think it was a joke and actually tried it out they immediately freaked out and did something stupid like: kill themselves out of guilt (six times), go insane and get locked up (thirteen times), tick off the apple-addicted Shinigami (four times),or ,worst of all, pronounce themselves the new Kira in front of Kira's supporters and get mauled by the crowd for being too stupid to realize that they needed the notebook to kill (one time, it wasn't pretty).

The problem was that- much to Ryuk's surprise- there weren't that many humans of genius intelligence around. When Light was Kira it was like you couldn't move without bumping into one, but after he died the supply seemed to run dry. This kind of made throwing down a Death Note in the first place kind of redundant. If the guy who picked up the notebook only did what you could guess they were going to do then there was nothing entertaining about them. The person who picked up the notebook had to be smart enough to at least surprise Ryuk every now and again or he was just going to get bored.

By now he had almost given up on the human world, but fortunately the Shinigami had finally found a human 'worthy' of the notebook. He had come across her quite by chance when he had been looking through one of the many holes in the Shinigami realm that lead to the human world for someone to kill in (in England for a change). He had caught his attention when she was being attacked by three older men. At first it looked like she was going to be mugged or worse but instead she had twisted the arm of the man holding her with a single sharp movement, tearing it from its socket. While the man was collapsing in agony she had rushed the two shocked men still standing and kicked one in the groin hard enough to make something crack (even Ryuk heard from his hole) and the man didn't remain standing for long. When the last pulled out a knife and lunged at her she had simply stepped aside and drove the triangle of her elbow into the back of his neck. He joined his friend without a sound. Then she had shocked Ryuk by pulling out her mobile phone and calling an ambulance.

Intrigued, he followed her movements through the gateway for the next few days. As he had suspected the girl seemed to have a 'good upbringing' (in other words she had morals) but unlike many 'Virtuous people' she could stand up for herself and did so without hesitation. In fact, she seemed to seek out those who didn't follow the rules and tried to punish them for it. However she was at the top of her class and was incredibly popular despite her 'better than thou' attitude towards the people who didn't follow the rules. Ryuk began laughing; it looked like he was going to have some fun after all.

*****

Jessica sighed as she walked home. So far this week she had been attacked by thugs, missed the bus three times, caught in the rain six times (make that seven, she gloomily corrected herself) and now her phone was broken. Oh, and she had just missed the bus again. Her house was a six mile walk up the mountain which her school was at the base of. She had to be home within an hour and she was flat broke. She reluctantly began trudging up the mountain, trying to avoid being swept over by the rushing wind.

As she was cursing her luck half an hour later (she had gone two and half miles and her legs were killing her) she noticed a black book by the road. Curious despite herself she walked up to it. Much to her surprise the book wasn't wet in the least. The only blemish on it's cover was a small amount of mud clinging to its velvet-like surface. On the front, printed in thin spidery letters was 'Death Note'. Raising an eyebrow, she wiped the mud of the cover and opened it beneath a convenient bus stop (noting that Fridays were the only days the regular buses didn't go on her route). In the Shinigami realm Ryuk's permanent grin grew wider.

The first page of the book was completely blank, the pages strangely stiff and smooth, almost as though they weren't made of paper. The inside cover caught her eye. It was covered with the same spidery letters as the front. It read: Death note, how to use.

From there on it listed a bunch of rules, the one that stunned Jessica the most however was the first. The human whose name is written in this note shall die... the method of death should be written within six minutes and forty seconds of the writing of that persons name.... if no method is specified the person will die of a heart attack... the person's face must be visualized while writing their name so others of the same name are not affected. She frowned. This had to be some kind of sick joke. A notebook that could kill people? Who would actually believe that anyway?

She got up prepared to throw the thing into the trash can next to the bench. But something held her back... what if the notebook was real? What if by writing someone's name down she could kill the without so much as touching them. No, she shook he head, this wasn't like her... but, still, if the Death Note was real- no! Something was off about this book. The moment she had it she had begun thinking murderous thoughts, true it could simply be because the books rules had suggested that it could kill and her mind had instantly provided the possibilities. Yes the possibilities are truly insp- what!? That's not how I think, even though it does have a point. If I could kill with just a name and face then I could revolutionize the world. Yes, but only if it is real... I would need to test it, she concluded as she wiped the moisture off the cover.

She tucked the notebook under her arm as there wasn't any room left in her bag and began walking home again. Yes I would have to test it... but on who? I suppose I could do it by randomly killing someone on the T.V. No… wait haven't I heard of something like this before? She thought, yes.. There had been some kind of mass murder a few years ago. Someone called Kira, ironically targeting criminals. But that had been years ago and the world had long moved on. Most people now thought it had some kind of giant hoax by Interpol, but there was still some kind of cult among the religious. According to them 'Lord Kira' would return to pass judgment upon the world and lead it into a new age. Along with the little green men and the mighty Boosh, she snorted to herself. But if Kira did exist as more than some kind of giant conspiracy by the law enforcement agencies then- She gasped as a car suddenly drove through a nearby puddle drenching her.

She gasped again as her already freezing body temperature dropped several points. She glanced at the note book, then shook her head. What was she thinking? Notebooks can't kill people; the thing was obviously a joke. She snorted again; she had obviously been spending too much time near the strong paints in the art department again. She tossed the thing across the road and was about to go on her way but something bugged her. Then she remembered the rule about ownership. Feeling stupid she turned back to the notebook and stood over it. She would have just gone off but for some reason she knew that unless she did this, it would plague her mind like an irritating fly that wouldn't go away. She drew a breath.

"I hereby give up ownership of this Death Note". She waited for a few seconds to see if she lost her memories as stated in the Death Note. After waiting a few seconds she began walking away, feeling stupider than ever. A killer notebook, for gods sake, and I played along! Thank god no one had been around to see her.

She went on her way, a few seconds later she blinked and stumbled, feeling light-headed. She glanced at her watch, feeling dizzy. It was quarter to four! It had been half an hour moments ago! Fifteen minutes to go four and a half miles uphill while in the freezing and drenched clothes. Her day was just getting better and better.

*****

"Noooo" groaned Ryuk as Jessica stalked off, leaving the Death Note half buried in mud. "I'm sooo booorrred".

"Wow, I had no idea," said a Shinigami shaped like a giant frog. "No, wait, I did! And do you know why I knew Ryuk? Because you haven't stopped whining since you got back from earth! Look at you, why the hell would you twist yourself up like that in the first place. What are you trying to be, some kind of demented pretzel?"

"Hey you don't have to deal with apple withdrawals!" Snapped Ryuk back, ignoring the fact his feet were tangled around his neck.

"There are apples right here!"

"Half the time you can't tell if they're apples or rocks," pointed out the disturbingly tangled Shinigami.

"What kind of Shinigami are you?" snapped the Frog-like Shinigami. "All you do is sit around and rant on about your disturbing apple-lust."

"Yeah, instead I should just lie around gambling with you lot right?" Said Ryuk. This started an argument between the two that lasted for several hours, time being irrelevant in the Shinigami realm. By the time Ryuk came back to viewing hole one of two things had changed: firstly the rain had stopped. Second...

...the Death Note was no where to be found.

*****

Nathaniel stared at the book before him in wonder. When he had taken the notebook from the side of the road on his way to his house he had never expected anything like this. At first, when he had opened the book, he had thought it was some kind of hoax. Then he had noticed that the pages weren't wet and no matter how many time he placed them in water or the mud they were never stained or dampened. They seemed to tear easily enough though.

There had obviously been more than met the eye about the notebook so he had simply put it into his bag and continued cycling back to his house. On the way he noticed that his thoughts continually drifted back to the 'Death Note'. He didn't worry about it. The new thoughts could be expected after finding a book with such morbid things written in the front cover, and his mind had a tendency to dwell on details far longer than other people's. But what was not to be expected was how his mind continually suggested ways to use the Death note, how to use it benefit himself. This was absurd, at least for him it was. If he was to try and gain power it would make far more sense to bend the people to his will, make them into resources to be used rather than to simply kill them off. At least that was what he would do. When he had gotten home he had immediately taken the Death Note from his bag and stared at it for a few seconds.

It was obvious that the book had least the power to influence his thoughts. He knew perfectly well that something that could have been so easily a hoax wouldn't have plagued his mind as it did, and even as he stared at it he could feel his thoughts continually turning back the Death Note even as tried to turn it to other subjects. This had never happened before to Nathaniel, the only way for something like the Death Note to be able to affect him like this it had to have some kind of power… but to be able kill...There was only one way to be sure that it worked.

He switched on the small television he had in his room, the six o'clock news was on. They were currently showing the image of a man with brown eyes and red hair. He was on the run after killing his wife and daughter. Nathaniel pulled a pen from the cup on his desk, placing the end to his lips before writing the man's name into the Death Note.

This way if the note worked then he would be among the millions who saw the announcement, in the unlikely event where the note worked there would be no way to find out who he was. If it didn't then it wouldn't matter. But... how to ensure that he would know when the man died? The note's rules mentioned that he could specify the cause of death. It was obvious to him that if he could do that then he could doubtlessly control the victim's movements to an extent before their death; free will could prevent the type of death specified from occurring, like a man deciding to buy coffee instead of using his coffee machine when he was supposed to be electrocuted by it. After a moments thought he wrote a few lines detailing the man's death.

Christian Taylor: 12:30 pm Saturday. Climbs up the Millennium wheel in London and states that he is God at 11.30 am. During the next half hour he states that all must bow to his will or face his holy wrath. At 12.00pm he states that in order for the people to prove their acceptance of him they must officially name him their King and god. At 12.25 he states that he will prove his holy powers by flying above London without any kind of flight equipment. At 12.30 pm Christian Taylor jumps from the Millennium wheel under the illusion that he posses the power of flight and falls to his death.

Nathaniel leaned backwards, pleased at his own inventiveness. Now he would have his proof within twenty-four hours, and if the Death Note was real, as he suspected due to its influence on his mind, then he would have simply taken the life of a criminal that no one cared about. He also noticed now that he had written a name in the Death Note that he no longer had the urge to use it. Evidently the notebook's ability to influence people only lasted until they had written a name into the Death Note, after which it was their choice to write names in it or not. Putting the Death Note out of mind he switched off his bedside lantern and settled down to watch the television.

*****

Ryuk was in a bad mood, not only had he lost the Death Note he had dropped in the human world for the umpteenth time (he was surprised it was still in one piece considering how many knocks it had taken in the past few years) but he had no idea where it was. This was not good. The rules stated that he had to possess the human who found the Death Note until they died. If he couldn't do that he would be joining Rem in wherever dead Shinigami went. He supposed he could drop C-Kira's Death note and haunt that human instead (why couldn't Midoria have given the note to him a few hours earlier? If she had, he wouldn't have traded away so many of his precious apples for another Death Note. Instead he was stuck with an extra Death Note that he had no use for and no apples. The only reason why he had even kept it was that he had paid too much for it to let it go. A bit like a human buying a rare painting only to find it was a copy, he simply couldn't bring himself to throw it out).

So instead he had kept both, only throwing down one at a time. Now he had to find the Death Note or he was... dust? It would have been fine had the viewing holes worked on Death Notes the same way they did on humans- finding any human whose face you knew. Unfortunately this was not he case, as a rather annoying Shinigami named Sidoh could testify.

*****

Nathaniel stared as the screen of the television, his blood running cold. There, Christian Taylor was shown screaming that he was god on top of the Millennium wheel. The report was coming live from London:

"... Fugitive Christian Taylor was first spotted climbing the landmark at eleven thirty in the morning," said the Reporter over the rushing wind. "He has long since managed to scale the Millennium Wheel and began declaring himself god once he reached the pinnacle of the national icon. Attempts by police to apprehend Mr Taylor have failed and the wheel has been forced to stop. Last week a warrant for Mr Taylor's arrest was issued after evidence that he had killed his wife Miranda Taylor and their two year old daughter Michelle Taylor was brought to light." The reporter switched to a board of experts discussing the matter who were suggesting that Taylor had gone insane before killing his wife and daughter. Nathaniel was stunned. Taylor was doing exactly as he had written. He glanced at the clock, Twelve twenty-five pm... Any second now...

"I am God!" Taylor's screaming voice pierced through the howl of the winds, the camera swiveled to him. "And I shall prove it to my loyal subjects and vile disbelievers alike by soaring through the sky above this cesspit of city!" He began laughing hysterically. Nathaniel trembled as the man began babbling about he was going to usher in a new age of peace and justice, then at twelve twenty-nine, forty seconds before twelve thirty he began to shuffle forward. Nathaniel leaned closer to the television. Thirty seconds... Taylor let go of the railing... Twenty seconds...the crazed man was screaming about his divinity while struggling against the wind... Ten seconds... some of the crowd below began screaming at him to get down, some chanting "jump, jump, jump" over and over again... Five seconds... Taylor spread his arms... four seconds... he placed one foot in the air leaving him with only one foot for purchase on the railing... three seconds... he gazed at the crowd below him with an enlightened expression on his face... two seconds... he took a breath... One second... Christian Taylor opened his mouth.

"I AM GOD!" He screamed. Twelve thirty. He let himself fall forward and into the crowd. He took a surprisingly long time to reach the concrete. The camera swiveled away seconds before he hit the surface, the crowd parting before him moments before he met his end. There was a loud crunch off-screen as the view suddenly cut to the studio. The strained voices of the reporters droned on, passing through Nathaniel's ears, his mind failing to register.

The Death Note had worked. Taylor was dead. Taylor had died because he had written his name in the Death Note.. he had killed Christian Taylor. He was a murderer.

He didn't move for several minutes. Then he absently switched the television off as it replayed the footage of Taylor's last moments over and over again. He bored of experts making comments with each re-run. He stood still, blankly staring at the motionless screen for a moment then he turned and went over to his desk. There, sitting open where he had left it, was the Death Note. Taylor's name and fate was spelled out clearly on the first page. He touched the page, his fingers passing over the dried ink, strangely without the indentation writing usually left on paper. Nathaniel left his chair and went to bathroom next to his room. He washed his face of the cold sweat and beheld his reflection, gray eyes staring back at him from under strands of black hair, a twisted grin covering his face. Through the Death Note he had gained the power of a god!

*****

Ryuk had finally found the Death Note after a week and a half of searching through the viewing holes. It was in the house of some human brat and his mother. If the brat happened to have any actual brain power the chances were that he would probably follow the same path as Light had. If he had the same values as the psychotic 'god' had had, to make things interesting all would be needed was a little nudging in the right direction.

He phased through the wall of the two story house, one of many in row, following the traditional London squeeze. The boy's room was Spartan, the floor was bare, the bed made, there was a small table to the side littered with pieces of paper with a cup of pens, a small television and a laptop with a computer chair in front of it. Right before the bed was a small chest of drawers. Right now the boy sitting in front of the laptop, rapidly typing. The Shinigami grinned. He had found that even if they were the dullest human being on earth they could provide at least a moment's entertainment by wetting themselves when they caught sight of him for the first time. He let out a small 'hyuk' as he crept forward.

Suddenly, much to his surprise the boy swiveled around on the old computer chair and stared at Ryuk almost bored expression. "Ryuk I presume?"

Ryuk's permanent grin widened after a moment of surprise. He had the feeling that this human would be interesting...

Nathaniel almost laughed at the brief expression of surprise that came across the Shinigami's face. Then again, anyone would be surprised that a stranger they thought they were sneaking up on would suddenly turn around and ask them if they were themselves, as though they were internet friends meeting for the first time.

Still, the simple fact that he had managed to surprise the Shinigami gave him not only the satisfaction of tricking a God of Death but several important pieces of information: Firstly that the Shinigami couldn't read his mind, a power supernatural beings might have, or he wouldn't have bothered to play along. Secondly, that Ryuk wasn't omniscient (able to see/know all things) or he would have realized that Nathaniel had been researching potential previous Death Note users (and had come up with Ryuk's name). So far he had come up with the being known as Kira as his prime suspect, although now he was mostly regarded as conspiracy cover. If he did exist he would have undoubtedly used such an item as the Death Note. The final piece of information that Nathaniel was able to dredge up from Ryuk's reaction was that he was unaccustomed to humans he didn't know knowing his name, which meant he probably wasn't well known among human Death Note users- although this could be pure speculation on his part.

"Hyuk, hyuk, hyuk, looks like somebody's been doing their homework," grinned the Shinigami. He glanced at the name above the boys head: Nathaniel Winters. "I'm guessing since you know my name you know what I am?"

Nathaniel raised an eyebrow, "obviously, I can see you so I have touched the Death Note- and only an idiot would fail to realize what you were once they read the rules of the Death Note."

Ryuk grinned, "I could just be a psycho in a costume" pointed out the Shinigami.

"You wouldn't have fit through the door, never mind the window, if you were wearing a costume." said Nathaniel indicating the door, obviously too small to fit Ryuk and his wings through. "And since you didn't act in the least confused when I mentioned the Death Note you have heard the combination of words at least once before, indicating that you already know about the Death Note. Besides, I doubt that there's anyone that disturbed they'd be able to dream up what you look like. No offense."

Ryuk's grin would have grown larger if possible. Brainiac: check. "So... how did you know my name anyway?" Asked the apple crazed Shinigami, looking around the room again.

"I used the Internet to search for evidence of previous users of the note. So far I've managed to find four confirmed users. There's no other way they could have committed their acts without using something like the Death Note. The first is obviously Kira. He is mostly considered a myth for some kind of giant conspiracy but I think he was real. I also believe that Yagami Raito, or Light Yagami in English, was Kira, but that is a secondary matter. The other confirmed users also have firm evidence of the Death Note's influence in their lives: Misa Amane, most likely the second Kira, Kyosuke Higuchi and a lawyer named Teru Mikami, all located in Japan.

"I have found evidence of twenty-three other unconfirmed users including a man in America named Marcel King who was idiotic enough to declare himself the new Kira at a Kira church meeting without immediate proof of his powers. During his dismemberment he yelled for someone named 'Ryuk' to save him several times, no-one in the immediate region was named Ryuk. Couple that with the fact that the man had spent a phenomenal amount on apples on the preceding weeks to his death, a trait shared by each of the confirmed and unconfirmed Death Note users besides C-Kira, and it became a strong possibility that Ryuk was your name." The fifteen year old finished his speech and noticed that Ryuk appeared to have started daydreaming.

Ryuk snapped out of it as the boy snapped his fingers an inch away from his ear. "Yeesh, and I thought Light was long-winded! I'm betting that you even did the whole 'kill everybody while I'm still kicking' thing he did".

Nathaniel looked curious before working out what Ryuk meant, "There was a huge amount of murders committed by Kira in the first week of his reported existence before they slowed down to the two-thousand-and-four to two-thousand-and-seven weekly averages. I'm guessing that he believed that you were coming to kill him or drag him down to hell, correct?" The Shinigami nodded. "Well I haven't done anything quite that drastic yet." The boy reached for the Death Note on the desk beside him and casually tossed it over to Ryuk who caught it easily.

He flipped it open and his mouth dropped open in shock (Nathaniel blanched as he caught sight of the many sharp teeth in his giant mouth). At first he thought that Nathaniel had lied and done what Light had done except to an even greater scale, but when he looked closer he could see that no names were actually recorded. Instead, well over seventy pages were covered in writing. From the first page, starting from Taylor's name and method of death were hundreds of pre-written deaths, everything from complex accidents to decade-long diseases.

When Ryuk looked up he saw the amused Nathaniel, long recovered from the sight of Ryuks shark like fangs. "If I should ever need to kill someone I'll be able to do it so that no-one will be able to connect me and the deaths together- they'll be too random to link back to me."

Ryuk grinned again "what if I had been coming for your soul for using my Death Note?"

"That wasn't going to happen", said Nathaniel, "if you had never intended for it to be used by a human then you wouldn't have written rules for a human in English, and if they were for Shinigami to follow they would have listed all of the limitations of the Death Note. There is no point in having rules if the Shinigami don't know what they are. And besides, if you had followed through with your threat with each of the people who gained your Notebook then there would have never been a Kira. If you didn't want your notebook found by a human you wouldn't have dropped it in the first place."

"Yeah your right- hey! What's with these guys, they tick you off or something?" asked Ryuk as he pointed to several names written beside various deaths.

"Those were my experiments. I already figured out most of the Death Note's unwritten limits by examining Kira and Co's murders. None had ever killed a non-sentient being so I wanted to find out what it's powers were over animals and other non-human life forms."

"And.." said Ryuk curiously. Even Light never went this far.

"The same effects apply to both animal and human. If they can perform the written method of death without killing another being in the process then they will die in that method. If not, they die of a heart attack, or just die without explanation in cases where the subject posses no heart. If the being possesses no name, like most bugs and plants, then by naming it you can kill it with that name. The names written in the Death Note are of a few rabbits plaguing the neighborhood, one of my mother's flowers and a spider that once lived in my closet."

"Hyuk. What's all this for anyway?" Asked Ryuk.

Nathaniel stared at him for a second, "what's this all... to test my new-found powers! If I ever need them it would be very useful to know if I can make someone die in certain way or not, especially if I'm being investigated!"

Ryuk thought about this, "so basically your just like a kid with a new toy, no world-wide ambitions. No changing the world with your holy powers?"

Nathaniel looked amused, "I'm not an idiot, like Light Yagami was. The world and every Nation in it is formed of individuals. If I wanted to change it forever I'd have to change the opinions of everyone, forever. Fear doesn't work to bring people onto your side, it just makes them determined to resist. And besides," he absently twirled a pen with his fingers, "I don't care about the world. Right and wrong are opinions. I don't follow a set of self-created rules. I live my life the way I want to- not how I believe I should act according to some imaginary code."

Ryuk had to think again for a moment. "So your just going to sit here and do what you did before? How is that interesting!?"

"To me, very. If I get bored I can always use this for some convenient entertainment", Nathaniel pointed to the Death Note. "But, even if I don't, what could you do about it? It's not like you can just kill me."

Ryuk's wide eyes narrowed ever so slightly. "And why is that?"

Nathaniel leaned forward ."Entertainment" he whispered. "If you get bored then you can simply go off and give someone else C-Kira's Death Note and watch them battle the new L -yes I worked out that the original L died- as they try to change the world. But if that 'Kira' is told that there's someone else with a Death Note, they'll try to hunt me down. Even I think it would be funny seeing someone who had deluded themselves into thinking they're a god try to find me and I know from what I've gathered about your personality that you would never throw away a good chance for entertainment."

Ryuk was stunned. If he didn't know better he would have said that he was speaking with Light again. But Light hadn't been able to work out that whatever being originally owned the notebook wouldn't want him to die so Natty the bratty here might actually be smarter than Light. "Well... if you can figure that much out on your own then you might be fun to watch after all, hyuk, hyuk- hey how did you know I had C-Kira's notebook!"

"Its on your belt beside your own," pointed out Nathaniel.

"Oh. And how did you know it was C-Kira's?"

Nathaniel began wondering if Ryuk had been dropped on the head as a... whatever a young Shinigami was "C-Kira possessed a Death Note, the Shinigami who gave it to him probably wasn't you because there were no sudden apples purchases in the areas where he had to have gained his information, but after he died none of the other 'Kiras' became 'Kiras' without a sudden increase in the amount of apples they bought. That Shinigami hasn't seemed to have come back, so he probably would've just given the extra Death Note to another Shinigami who was more interested in Earth. You're the only one -that I've been able to find, anyway- who has come down to Earth in recent years so..."

"Yeah, yeah" Smart-ass.

"I have no idea why you have three, though. Maybe you got another before you got C-Kira's in replacement for Kira's when it was presumably destroyed," mused Nathaniel. "But it doesn't matter. Now I, unlike certain apple-addicted Shinigami, am tired." He pointedly yawned. "If you want an apple my neighbor, across the street, grows them in their backyard." The teenager then went to bed, leaving Ryuk alone.

"Well," he said after two hours of listening to Nathaniel snore. "This is boring."

Author's Note: Okay people, this is pretty much the new version of previous story I had named Death Note: A New Kira. It's basically the draft version of Death Note: Revolution, the first chapter is the first three of A New Kira stitched together. However new material will be coming as of the next chapter so keep an eye out for the next update!

-MRegent.2