A/N: Hey there!

Here's to the beginning of a brand new roller-coaster ride. I promise you'll be rewarded, but bear with me for a bit. I want to build things slowly in order to enjoy them to the full extent.

I'll do my best to update as regularly as I can (mental deadline: every two days until uni starts, min once every week after uni starts).

Let's mutually agree on something: I don't want to feed you bullshit, so be straight-forward with me if there's something you don't like. This is a work in progress, so I might go back and change things up.

I love you guys, I love YOI and I love the YOI fandom. Let's have a blast! ^-^

Finally, the Grand Prix Final was over, and we'd be going on a much needed break.

I tried to think of the last time we'd done something relaxing, and the first thing that came into my mind was the sight-seeing trip in Barcelona. Victor and I had spent a beautiful day, concluded in the best way possible. I could still hear the sound of the choir sometimes and pictured myself standing at the cathedral with Victor, his hand in mine, and matching rings on our fingers.

That night, Victor had laid with his limbs splayed over his bed, a breath's distance from me. He rarely wore a top when he went to bed, and I'd watched his chest rise and fall as he slept. He had such an innocent look about him then. I was used to seeing him as his usual confident self, but asleep he looked so... vulnerable.

Dangling from the side of the bed was his hand, and around his finger, the ring I had given him shone under the moonlight. He hadn't taken the ring off even when he slept, and that me unreasonably happy.

After the final, we'd decided to go to St. Petersburg.

Victor was waiting for me with Yurio at his side, on one of the 300 hundred bridges in St. Petersburg, this particular one crossing the Fontanka River. His face beamed when he spotted me running towards them, breathless.

How could a city be so cold yet so beautiful at the same time?

I stopped and Victor gave me a hug.

"Yuuri! You made it!" The tips of his ears were pink, and I decided they looked very cute.

I managed a smile. "Y-yeah."

Yurio jumped off the railings he had been sitting on and hit my back with his palm. "Welcome to Russia, katsudon."

I straightened and smiled. This was a warm greeting by Yurio standards.

"Let's get moving!" Victor hopped on his bike and rode forth, Makkachin and Yurio trailing behind him. Some things never changed, regardless of where you were in the world.

Nevertheless, being in Russia felt odd. I had spent a long time away from home before, but I couldn't help feeling slightly uneasy. Everything around me was in an illegible language and everything just seemed foreign, from the buildings to the trees.

This must've been how Victor felt when he came to Hasetsu.

I realized I was already far behind them and started running. If being in Russia meant being with Victor, I was ready to spend my entire life here.

Yurio was showing me how to jump with raised arms, when Victor returned from lunch.

"You look happy," Yurio pointed out dejectedly.

Victor's lips were pressed like he was trying to suppress a smile, but his eyes shone like bright pools.

"Did something happen?" I asked.

Victor nodded, holding his breath.

"Oi!" Yurio exclaimed. "Spill it out already and stop wasting our time!"

Miffed by the commotion, Yakov came over to us. "What's going on here? Vitya, why are you making that face?"

"Yakov! I met someone!"

Yakov's face fell. "Oh, this again," he said and walked away.

"What?! Vitya met someone?" Mila skated over, all ears. "Who is it? What are they like?"

"Her name is Irina," Victor said. "I met her at the restaurant; she gave me her number. And I think I'm in love."

I hardly understood anything Victor said after that.

Victor met someone.

Of course he did. He was Victor Nikiforov. Men and women died to meet him. But what made this one so special? Why did she get his attention? How... how could she have Victor's heart, when I...

"That's great," I said, cutting Victor off. Mila and Victor looked surprised, and Yurio looked like he couldn't care less about this issue. "Good for you, Victor." I said as I pushed myself off the wall and gained speed.

Envy... I felt envious of someone I hadn't even met yet.

I started skating, trying to drown out my thoughts. What had Yurio told me? Ah, yes. Let's try the triple toe loop, arms in the air. One, two...

Imbalanced by my arms, I crashed on the side of my left leg.

"Yuuri!" I heard Victor exclaim. I stood up, ignoring the ache in my leg.

"I'm fine!" I called back. I had to focus.

You tend to flub your jumps when something is on your mind...

Victor understood me like no one else. And yet...

Breathe.

I thought of last year's exhibition piece: Stand Close To Me. *(English translation at the end).

Sento una voce che piange lontano
Anche tu, sei stato forse abbandonato?

It was such a beautiful piece...

I could feel tears prickling my eyes. Not now. I couldn't cry now, with so many people around. Especially when Victor was watching.

I blinked hard and tried to focus on another jump.

Triple Axel.

Miraculously, it landed.

Orsù finisca presto questo calice di vino
e inizio a prepararmi
Adesso fa' silenzio

Footwork.

Con una spada vorrei tagliare quelle gole che cantano d'amore
Vorrei serrare nel gelo le mani che scrivono quei versi d'ardente passione

Don't think of Victor.

Don't think of his eyes, his smile...

I flubbed another jump.

Questa storia che senso non ha
Svanirà questa notte assieme alle stelle
Se potessi vederti dalla speranza nascerà l'eternita

How is that even possible? Don't think of Victor, don't think of the girl...

Another jump! A flip, perhaps?

I was pushing myself to the limit, beads of sweat dripping from my temples.

Stammi vicino, non te ne andare
Ho paura di perderti

Success.

Now a combination spin.

Le tue mani, le tue gambe,
le mie mani, le mie gambe,
e i battiti del cuore
si fondono tra loro

I'm afraid...

Please Victor.

Stay close to me.

I can't lose you.

Partiamo insieme
Ora sono pronto!

I was breathless. There had been an uproar of applause the night I had performed this after the Grand Prix Final, and it was still ringing in my ears. I had been thinking of Victor then, just as I was now.

Victor loved another person.

It didn't seem true. It couldn't be true... It had to be a nightmare.

Yurio skidded to a stop beside me.

"Gather yourself, katsudon," he said. "Go rest. You've been through enough for one day."

I chuckled. Yes, I had been through enough for today. "Alright. Thanks, Yurio. For the pointers."

The corner of Yurio's mouth pulled into a smile, then fell into a frown again.

I left the rink and went into the changing room. Victor came in after me.

"Hey, Yuuri. Done for the day?"

"Yeah," I said. "When are you planning to get off?"

"Now," he said. "I'll come with you."

We changed, and started walking to his house. I had been there only this morning, to drop off my things after arriving from the airport. To think, Yurio was right: I really had been through a lot today.

"Your house is nice," I said to Victor as we walked. "And huge."

"Yeah," Victor laughed. "All of these old buildings are huge on the inside. That's why in the Soviet times several families used to live in separate rooms of one apartment. They called those kommunalkas."

"Ah. Is that what your apartment will turn into once your girlfriend moves in with us?"

Victor's smile faded.

"Don't say that, Yuuri. I would not move that fast... and besides, you should always feel at home there, with me."

"I know you don't move that fast, Victor," I said, anger rising in my voice. He'd just said something very sweet, but somehow I couldn't feel it. "That's why I don't understand this whole thing. All of a sudden, you're in love on a whim, with a girl you met two hours ago?"

Victor went quiet.

"Nevermind," he said.

This was just like Victor. His passive aggression caused him to fold like a flower, hiding his true thoughts and feelings. He read other people too well, but wouldn't allow the same for himself.

Why?

"Damn it, Victor," I muttered and hugged him. He looked taken aback at first, but hugged me back.

Victor had complicated reasons for everything. Those reasons could be wrong sometimes and required a pat on his thinning hair to remind him that he was not flawless. I just hoped this time I could find out what that reason was.

"Let's go home," he said softly in my ear. I concurred.

I walked into the living room, where Yurio was watching something on TV while munching on cereal. Victor came out of his room, fastening the buttons of his dress shirt. He smelled of bay leaf and looked gorgeous.

My heart sank when I realized why he dressed up.

"How do I look?" Victor asked with a soft smile.

"Like govno," Yurio remarked without taking his eyes off the TV screen. Yuuri couldn't help chuckling at the Russian word for shit.

Victor frowned. "At least Makkachin likes it," he said, when the poodle came to lick his hand. "Yuuri! What do you think?"

I looked him over. He had worn one of his finest Italian designer outfits. Then again, Victor's outfits were never anything less than immaculate.

"Perfect," I said wistfully.

Had Victor just blushed, or was it my imagination?

"I'm heading out, then!" he grinned brightly.

"Where are you going to take her?" I asked as we headed to the door. I didn't really want to know, but one couldn't help wondering.

"I'll take her to the Moskva Restaurant on the Vosstanya Square," Victor answered. He looked at his watch.

"Have a good time," I told him and locked the door behind him. Afterwards, I sat on the couch next to Yurio.

"He is such an idiot," Yurio muttered. "Getting all dressed up for that ugly fuck."

I shrugged and took a handful of his cereal. "Do you think he'll come back tonight?" I asked.

Yurio paused, uncertain of what to tell me. He didn't need to; I understood perfectly.

"I think I'll go to bed," I said, standing up.

He nodded. "Good night."

I'd honestly have preferred it if Yurio had wished me something like "Go drown in your sleep" instead, for I really felt like crawling under the bed-sheets to die.

I did end up crawling under the bed-sheets, but instead of dying, I lay awake, thinking of Victor.

I reached out and touched the ring around my finger. Had Victor been wearing it today? Or had he taken it off, so that the girl wouldn't misunderstand? I couldn't remember seeing it on him. Maybe after the GPF, it didn't mean anything to him anymore. He'd told me he wanted to be my coach until I retired... where was that man now? It felt like he flipped a switch.

I looked over at the far end of the bed, and the image of him sleeping popped into my head. Would he look as peaceful, as vulnerable, sleeping next to her?

The thought of him naked, breathing heavily, entangled with another person slowly killed me inside.

What would his moans sound like? What would make him moan? And when he came...

I felt myself harden at the thought.

Stop Yuuri. Stop.

I moaned, turning around in the bed. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't empty my mind. How could this be happening?

I fixed my eyes on the ceiling and lay there, motionless, for I don't know how long. When the heavy thudding on the door began, the digital clock by the bed told me it was 4:44 A.M.

I didn't react at first, thinking maybe I'd imagined it. But when the banging continued, something clicked inside me. Could it be?

I threw the bed-sheets aside and jumped on my feet, running to the door. When I reached it, the banging had stopped. I looked through the peeping hole, but there was no one on the other side. A bitter disappointment coursed through me. I had been wishing for Victor to return so badly that my mind had began playing tricks on me. And anyway, why would he come home at such a disastrous hour?

"Yuuri..." I thought I heard faintly. My heart started racing again. What if I hadn't imagined it?

I slowly opened the door, and found a disheveled Victor sitting on the floor, leaning against the door frame. His face was flushed pink and his breathing slow.

"Victor!" I exclaimed and bent down. The bay leaf smell was overwhelmed by the smell of alcohol. I put an arm around his torso and pulled him inside. He made an unintelligible sound and wrapped his arms around my neck. I closed the door and ushered him to his bedroom.

His looked at me through lidded eyes and smiled. He seemed unaware of things that happened around him; it was a miracle he found the way home.

"What happened to you, Victor?" I asked as I helped him into the bed.

His arms around my neck tightened and he nuzzled his nose in my hair.

I pulled away and started taking his clothes off. Once I removed his shirt, I froze.

There was the ring I had given him, hanging around his neck on a silver chain.

"Yuuri," he said again, his hand reaching for me. "Why arew whou vooking at meh...ike zat..." he drifted off.

"You're not making any sense right now, you drunk," I scolded him. He made a whimpering sound like his feelings were hurt.

"I'm sorry," I said immediately, tucking him under the sheets. I sat on the bed beside him to make sure he was still breathing. He looked as innocent as ever, droplets of water shining underneath his eyes.

"Victor..." I whispered, "Are you crying?"

He grabbed my hand and rolled over, causing me to wrap him in an embrace from behind.

"Stay Close to Me..." he whispered.

A/N: So there it is: you've reached the end for now. What do you think? Do you like the pace as it is now? Would you like some side stories including Yurio and other skaters to run parallel to the main story? I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Also, do you guys prefer shorter chapters or longer chapters? Around how many words? I often can't decide at which point to end a chapter, and in all honesty I could go on for ages, so if you prefer shorter ones let me know.

We used to live in an apartment on the Fontanka several years ago. Seeing it appear on YOI was a huge surprise, as you can imagine. Writing this brought back fond memories :)

EDIT: Here are the English lyrics to Stay Close to Me.

I hear a voice crying far away

Have you been abandoned as well?

Come now, let's empty this glass of wine soon

I'll start getting ready

Now be silent.

With a sword I wish I could cut those throats singing about love

I wish I could seal in the cold the hands that portray those verses of burning passion

This story that makes no sense

Will vanish tonight along with the stars

If I could see you from hope eternity will be born

Stay close to me, don't go

I'm afraid of losing you

Your hands, your legs,

My hands, my legs,

The heartbeats

Are fusing together

Let's leave together

Now I'm ready