I always found it ironic that the Tower of Salvation was where the new world would supposedly begin; it never seemed like the beginning when we entered that damned place. Instead, every time we walked up those stairs, we lost someone important to us, a friendship would come to an end.
I guess you could say it started with Colette. She was the first one we lost and the first time we really felt betrayed. I know, sweet, innocent Colette. Why would she have any reason to keep something from her best friends? It wasn't so bad, the reason why she didn't want us to know I mean. I could understand why she wouldn't want to tell us, but did she really think that we wouldn't get upset finding out she had disappeared into the Tower of Salvation and never returned, without a goodbye? Telling us personally would've have been much better than hearing it from Raine…
"Boys…"
I hate it. Everything; hearing Raine talk with so much sympathy in her voice; watching Colette's father, emotionlessly stare down at us; seeing Colette look at us, hands clasped in front of her chest, as if she were begging us to forgive her. It honestly hurt. A lot. Out of all the people in the world, I would've never believed it if someone had told me this was going to happen. That Colette would lie to us about her dying. That we should be happy living in the new world she was sacrificing herself to create. How could we live with ourselves knowing that we couldn't even try to stop her? How could I be happy living in a world without Colette? I would miss her so much; her bright smiles every time she greet us; her blushes after Lloyd teases her; her laugh after I slam a book down when Lloyd falls asleep.
"Colette!" Lloyd starts to move forward, reaching out to grab Colette.
"Lloyd! You can't!" I grab him, looping my arms around his stomach and bury my face into his back.
Twisting awkwardly, he looks down at me. "You can't be serious?! We can't just let Colette go!" His voice cracks a bit near the end. I say nothing. What is there to say? "I can't beli-"
He shuts his mouth when I shake my head, squeezing tighter as the tears begin to fall. "I-" I clear my throat. "I don't want her to go, but this – this is her choice Lloyd, we can't -" I pause and tilt my head downwards. "-shouldn't stop her."
Lloyd opens his mouth, glaring down at me…
Please Lloyd.
And I stare back, barely realizing that Colette is talking….
I know that you don't want this to happen and – and I can't say I want to forget you all- We both flinch. – but this is for the good of everyone in Sylvarant. Everyone will be so happy once the world begins to flourish. And you can live with everyone in this new world. Happily. So please, just let me go.
I can see the thoughts running through his mind as he tries to look for something in between. A plan. An excuse. Anything that can delay the inevitable. But it's no use, and Colette knows that. She also knows that we'll do what's right.
Letting go was the hardest thing I've ever done and I'm sure that it was ten times worst for Lloyd.
I remember feeling so numb. I couldn't bear to see Colette like that. Her eyes changed from the bright blue eyes that would sparkle to a dull shade of red. It was like she was there, but at the same time, miles away. And from there, things only got worse.
I didn't get it; why he decided at that moment to announce he had betrayed us all, that everything we had been through meant nothing to him. Like Lloyd wasn't broken enough already from losing Colette, now he had to lose his... heh, I'm not really sure what Kratos was to him. Colette said that Kratos was like an older brother to Lloyd. She said that he would act annoyed of Lloyd, but really appreciate him being around. Some appreciation. Sis thought he was more like an instructor. I had always thought that Lloyd saw Kratos as a father. Weird right? But I dunno, I just got that vibe. Whenever Lloyd got hurt in battles, before Raine could even begin moving to Lloyd, Kratos would get there first and heal him. Everytime. I first noticed it at the Balacruf Mausoleum. Raine barely glanced at Lloyd throughout the whole battle. When I confronted her, she merely said that he was taken care of. From then on, it was just normal that Kratos took care of Lloyd.
But now… he threw all that trust Lloyd placed in him away. He said he was a member a Cruxis, and that he was sent to watch over the chosen, to 'ensure that the body of Martel would arrive unharmed'.
Bastard.
I bet he enjoyed watching us fight and nearly die for Colette, for her to get there safely, protecting her only so she could die.
Nothing in the world mattered anymore, all we had to do was get Colette out and find a way to fix her.
It's quiet.
The sounds of the battle instantly stop as an invisible power forces me to one knee. I can see Lloyd off to one side on his hands and knees; Sis isn't too far away either. I can't see Sheena, but I can hear her gasp in pain behind me. Damnit…
Lloyd grips the hilts of his twin swords tightly, stabs one into the ground and pulls himself up, staring defiantly up at Yggdrasill.
He stares back smugly, raising an eyebrow as if to dare Lloyd to try and stop him.
Gritting my teeth, I rise to my feet unsteadily and take a shaky step forwards, and then another and another.
No, nonononono. Now isn't the time to be a hero, Lloyd. I try to speak, to warn Lloyd, to scream at him to run away. That we can't win. But my voice disappears and our time runs out.
Yggdrasill smirks and sends another pulse of energy right across the stage, hurling Lloyd into a stone pole across the stage and knocking me back to the ground. I tilt my head to the side and catch a glimpse of Lloyd. He's slumped against the ruined pole. Large chunks of stone are scattered around him as more crumble down. His shirt is dyed a tone darker, saturated in his own blood.
I can't think straight anymore. Blobs and muted sounds are all I have to rely on. Pain is all I can feel. Someone grabs my arm roughly and throws me across their shoulder, making the world spin wildly as my head throbs. I push down the feeling of nausea and weakly fight to get free. I have to help Lloyd. He's hurt and bleeding and…
And…
And then my world is engulfed by the darkness. Shadows wrap around me in a cold embrace, slowly dragging me away from the reality. The pain has faded into an uncomfortable throb that reassures me that I'm still alive.
Raine...
Sheena…
Colette…
Lloyd…
Are you all still okay?
It was almost a whole year before we battled in the Tower of Salvation.
We were rescued from the last battle against Kratos and Yggdrasill by these people that called themselves the Renegades. We all stayed in the base for days to recover.
Surprisingly, Lloyd was the first one to wake up. You'd think that he would take advantage over the situation and sleep for as long as he can before Raine slaps him awake. Lloyd was seriously hurt, near fatal. They used a sedative to keep him asleep so he wouldn't wake up and make his wounds worst. But he woke up, thrashing and crying. One of the guards said that he was screaming for forgiveness. From Colette, Raine, Sheena, everyone in Iselia. I woke up just as he begged Kratos to come back.
They knocked him out after that but backed away from me as I snarled at them to leave.
Raine was the next to come around. She tried to heal Lloyd but…she couldn't. Her mana was still trying to regulate itself from the overuse in the tower. So every little bit was being used just to keep her alive.
Sheena was barely holding on. She was the hurt the most out of the group. Kratos' sword had sliced her back open when she pushed Lloyd out of the way and her entire body was littered with large cuts from a powerful Wind Blade. Corrine faithfully curled up next to Sheena's head, waiting for the moment Sheena would awaken.
And Colette…
She just stood there, blankly staring ahead, not even affected by the chaos surrounding her. I tried everything I could think of to get her back to the way she was before. But nothing worked.
The Colette I knew was gone. And with Lloyd lying there, pale and weak, I – I panicked. I thought instead of just losing Colette, I would lose Lloyd too. It was selfish but…they were the first people to accept me, befriend me. I just couldn't lose them.
I stumbled to Lloyd's bedside, crept into the bed, and threw the blanket over the both of us. It was there, pressed up to Lloyd's bandaged side, that I promised to myself that no one else would hurt Lloyd ever again.
But I couldn't keep my promise. Lloyd did get hurt again.
It was Zelos this time. I found it funny, in that sick humor way, that it was yet another redhead that would betray Lloyd's trust. I always felt uneasy around Zelos. Not because he was always flirting with a new woman everyday or because he was always hitting on Presea and my sister. No, it was because he buried his real self underneath his mask. It was obvious to me. The small things he said that could've easily been brushed off but they nagged at me. What did he mean by that? Was there some hidden meaning? Why did he always seem so depressed when Lloyd said he believed in Kratos? It bugged me for a long time. But when we entered the Tower of Salvation again, everything became clear.
The silence was shattered by the sound of metal screeching against metal.
I watch the sight of the two swordsmen. They seem to be dancing rather than fighting. Every movement is choreographed perfectly. Each attack is blocked smoothly. My hand tightens around my kendama when a stab comes close to hitting Lloyd. Raine places a hand on my shoulder and shakes her head.
I understood. But it didn't mean I had to like it.
Lloyd wanted us to sit out on this battle. He said he wanted to settle this by himself with no help. I know that isn't the real reason. He doesn't want to put us through anymore than we already have been through. He doesn't want me and Raine to fight another one of our comrades. Even if I didn't like Zelos all that much, but I…I couldn't imagine fighting him. But I didn't want Lloyd to have to either.
And with a pained gasp, the sharp clang of a sword dropping to the floor, and the sound of blood dripping to the floor, it all ends.
Sheena takes in a sharp breath next to me.
Oh goddess.
One of Lloyd's swords is sheathed up to the hilt in his torso. Zelos' torso. Blood comes streaming down his blade and covers his gloves in a deep crimson. They're breathing laboriously. They stand in silence until Zelos wearily chuckles.
"Man, you got me good."
Zelos collapses, forcing Lloyd down on his knees to support him.
He stares in shock at the damage to Zelos' body.
"Professor!"
Raine snaps out of the trance she was in and hurries next to Lloyd, ready to bark out orders. Lloyd quickly complies and removes the sword as quickly and painlessly as he can.
"No…"
We all freeze at the whisper.
"Don't bother." The dying redhead smirks tiredly. " 'm too far gone anyways."
"Don't be an idiot!" Sheena looks ready to cry. "There's still time, the Professor can still save you!"
Zelos lets his head turn to the side and looks at the coffins floating around the stage. Probably imagining if he would be placed among them. "Saved…?" He gives a bitter laugh. "I can't be saved anymore."
"Of course you can, idiot Chosen!"
He hums in amusement as his eyes slowly shut.
"Don't you dare close your eyes!"
"Stay awake!"
"Zelos!"
His death isn't anything dramatic. This wasn't like any plays I've seen. He didn't die as a hero. His lover wasn't there to cry and mourn over his body. No, this was reality. It wasn't like the actor was just going to stand up, take a bow, and return to his normal life. No, Zelos' life was over. I think that's why his death was so sad. He was gone forever. He would never live the rest of his life because it had all disappeared.
Some bowed their head, like they were sending up a prayer, hoping Zelos would be fine. Others looked away; deciding that it is took difficult to even glance at his corpse. Lloyd just stared blankly.
I couldn't bear to continue looking. Lloyd…he was acting just like Colette when she had lost her soul.
We left after we all had collected ourselves. I pushed everyone else ahead of me, telling them to go first.
I'll never forget those words he uttered before I stepped through that warp.
I stand in front of the warp, my back towards my 'comrade'.
It remains silent for a few seconds before I finally speak.
"I'll never forgive you." I don't even bother turning around. I know he's listening. I know he's not dead yet.
I continue on. "I'll never, ever, forgive you for what you did to Lloyd. He'll," I pause. "He'll always suffer for the choice you made. For the rest of his life, he'll regret it." I smile bitterly. "'cause that's just who Lloyd is."
I step on the warp, the familiar feeling overtaking my being. But before I leave, I hear those words that I would never have expected to hear.
"Dun worry, brat. I'll never forgive m'self either. Rest assured, that I'll burn in Hell for the sins I've commited."
"…Good."
For us, it was the last time that we would ever have to return to the Tower of Salvation but for Lloyd, he returned there, one last time.
This time, to say goodbye to his father. His real father. The one that had betrayed, lied, and nearly killed his son.
And even after the Journey of Regeneration had ended and the two worlds were merged into one. Even after the worlds had stopped vying for the mana both needed so desperately to survive. Lloyd still lost someone…
Maybe it was our destiny, our fate, which caused us to lose and hurt so many people. But fate can be changed, can't it? No matter how many times I've said this, I can' t help but feel that as time moves on and the worlds change, for the better or the worst, we'll only end up losing more than we'll ever gain.
I wonder, just how long can we all last.
Woo! Alright then, I've got a crap load to say so if you want to skip this just go ahead.
Where to start? Okay, this story is most likely going to be a one-shot and only a one-shot. But we'll see. I might continue it and do different people's POV. Like Colette or Raine. Maybe even Kratos. (Heh, I'd like to see how that one would turn out.) I would try to do Lloyd buuut, that's sort of hard. Originally, this was going to be in Lloyd's POV instead of Genis' but then it got all spiteful and bitter and I thought "No way Lloyd would be THAT angsty. So Genis it is!"
Uh, go ahead and review if you want to. Truthfully, I almost never review for any of the stories I read (guilty) So I'm not gonna become all hypocritical and order you to review. I'm also not gonna tell you to be uber nice to me and say OMG THIS WAS TOTALLY AWESOME 'cause I know, it isn't. Any criticism will be nice. Don't bother reviewing if you're just gonna tell me it sucks just 'cause it does. If there is a reason behind it, then knock yourself out and tell me. Don't just say it and leave it at that.
Please tell me if there are any errors in my typing. Spelling or otherwise. Or any plot holes or errors. It bugs me just as much as it probably bugs you. :)
Finished 4 minutes before it's officially Christmas!
Hmm, let's see. That's pretty much it. So I hope you've enjoyed reading this 'cause it's been really fun writing it even though it's all angsty and I killed Zelos. (Totally can't believe I killed Zelos, he's the best. RightnexttoRichterandKratos. :D
Thank you for reading! Merry Christmas!
Oh right, almost forgot.
Disclaimer: I do not own Tales of Symphonia or any characters mentioned.