I haven't written anything in a while and wanted to post a crackish one shot. This obviously takes place after chapter 700. The pairing of Boruto/Sarada is slightly implied at the beginning. It's not the best one shot in the world and the grammar is a little iffy, but It was something I just felt like writing. That being said, enjoy!

I do not own Naruto.

This week can't get any worse Boruto thought as he kicked his freshly empty Ramen container into the trashcan. Life hadn't been to kind to him, in his opinion recently.

His last prank of attempting to paint the Hyuga compound bright pink was foiled by his mother who proceeded to force him to learn the "Importance of discipline". This was followed up by Shino-Sensei giving him detention for rigging his desk with smoke bombs.

Stupid freakin bugs. Cursed Boruto Inwardly

How was I supposed to know they can detect smoke bombs. What a cheater.

Not to mention Sarada had been acting awfully weird around him the past couple of days. When he asked his father why all he got was "You'll figure it out eventually" and "I was just as dense at your age"

That was another thing. He hadn't exactly seen Naruto in a while.

Stupid responsibilities crap. You'd think the Hokage could spend some time with his family

Boruto cut down another street, continuing to look at the ground and sulk about his misfortune. As he about to pass the hot springs he heard a small perverted giggle.

A pervert? Who'd be that desperate to see some naked women?

Entering what he liked to call "Ninja stealth mode" Boruto quietly crept around the corner to confront this pervert and heroically put an end to his peeping

A mental picture entered his head of the town honoring him in all his glory. His acts wouldn't go unrewarded.

I'll get a medal and a statue and Tousan will step down and I will become Hokage Dattebase!

Speaking of the devil, It turns out the giggles of a pervert were coming from none other than his father. There was the Nanadaime Hokage, the great Naruto Uzumaki, staring through a peephole all while aggressively writing in a small notebook.

"Tousan what are you doing?" Boruto said in a low tone

Naruto quickly froze and turned around to see his son staring at him with a questioning look

"Tousan's just doing a bit of research for his upcoming book, squirt" Naruto whispered, as he couldn't believe he got caught by his own son.

"What do you mean research?" Boruto asked inquisitively

"Well son you see my master-"

"Ero-Sennin" Boruto quickly cut in

"Yes Ero-Sennin wrote an amazing series called Icha-Icha and as his last surviving student it is my duty to continue the books in his name" Naruto stated in a hushed tone

"Those porn books that Kashi-Ji reads? Those are gross!" Boruto said a little bit louder

"Shhhhh you'll blow me cover. Here take a look for yourself"

Boruto approached the small hole in the wooden fence with caution. Sticking one eye in what he saw was a sight he would never forget.

There sat Sakura, Ino, Temari and Shizune. All clad in nothing but towels. The five women were chatting away but Boruto couldn't even be bothered with what ehy were saying. He had successfully died and gone to heaven. Kami had blessed his life.

Somewhere in the far reaches of the Afterlife

Jiraiya sat calmly under his favorite tree in the meadow. It was a good time for a small cat nap in his opinion. As he began to close his eyes a strong feeling enveloped his body

"A New member joins the dark side" he stated to himself with a perverted giggle of his own.

Screw the nap. More research must be done Jiraiya quickly jumped up from his spot beneath the tree and took off towards the nearest hot spring.

The Afterlife certainly had its benefits

Back In Konoha

"This is the greatest day of my life" Boruto whispered to his father with a stream of blood coming out of his nose. However his feelings of joy quickly transformed into ones of horror. On the same day he became a man, Boruto saw the sight no boy ever wanted to see.

Hinata had just entered the hot spring in the same attire as the five other women and before she could even sit down she along with the rest of Konoha heard a high-pitched scream

"MY EYES THEY BURN" Boruto yelled at the top of his lungs before throwing his hands out in front of his and knocking down the surprisingly weak fence.

Time was now frozen as the six Kunoichi starred in shock at the sight in front of them. There sat their "Noble" Hokage and his only son. Shock quickly turned to anger however as each of the six women's faces took on a hue of red.

"Boruto…Run" were the only two words Naruto could say to his son as all hell broke loose.

Boruto took off covering his eyes, and proceeded to run into a wall getting knocked unconscious. Hopefully the brain trauma would erase the image of his Mother nearly naked.

At The Same Time With Naruto

"NA-RU-TOOO" The six Kunoichi's yelled all while giving him the look of death. Naruto couldn't do much as words simply escaped him. The shouts of "pervert", "hentai" and "lecher" all rung out as he was beaten to a bloody pulp.

He spent the following week in the hospital as neither Tsunade, Sakura nor Shizune were willing to heal him.