"Miss Rosa White, age 17, arguably the top romance writer in all of Unova, nay, the entire world I sa-"
"Enough with the butter, Dawn. What do you need and is it gonna get us in trouble again?" Rosa said as she and her friend Dawn made their way home from school.
"What I'm asking for is the complete opposite of trouble! It's love!" Dawn spread her arms and beamed at Rosa.
"I swear to God if you're just asking me out for my money I'm-"
"No no no, not in that way! I mean I need your help with it!" Dawn shook her head. "All I need from you, one of the best writers I know, is a teensy-weensy little... love letter." she stopped in front of Rosa, clasped her hands together and put on her best pout. "...Wow, you have an amazingly intense disapproval face, you know that?"
"First of all you don't know any other writers." Rosa started, highly annoyed. "Secondly, getting someone else to write a love letter for you defeats the entire purpose! I'm not the one trying to date the, you are!" Rosa side-stepped Dawn and continued forward.
"Listen, listen, I know it sounds crazy but you know fully well how I write. "Dawn jogged to catch back up, hands still clasped. "Remember that time last year when we had to write an essay on our experiences in high school so far and I offended every teacher in the entire 10th grade?"
Rosa's expression softened into a slight grin, "The principal still makes passive aggressive comments sometimes..."
"And that time I tried faking a doctor's note to get out of gym and it started a fight between Coach and my actual doctor." Dawn continued, slowing her pace and frowning at the memory.
Rosa broke into a laugh, "They made up and became friends, I hear." She sighed and patted her friend on the back. "Alright fine, I'll do it just this once. But only because we're friends, you hear?"
Dawn shifted back into her usual happy, excitable mood. "Thank you sooooo much!" She jumped onto Rosa and threw her arms around her. "You won't regret this!"
"Yeah, whatever." Rosa gave a half smile and returned the hug. "Just don't drag me along as a third wheel on your dates, okay? Who am I making this for anyways?"
"Oh... ah..." Dawn slid off of Rosa and began pressing her fingers together and blushing. "It's... way too embarrassing to say so just make it vague, please!"
Rosa sighed again, "You worry me sometimes, Dawn."
Dawn quickly regained her composure and gave her a thumbs up. "N-No need to worry! You've totally got this!"
The two said their goodbyes as they reached their destinations and departed.
–
Later that night Rosa was waging a war with the letter in her room.
"Ugh! No one calls each other 'My dear' in this day and age! I'll just... start over!" She crumpled up the pink sheet of stationary and threw it behind her back in the general direction of her trashcan.
If she had actually taken the time to check behind her she'd see that every last paper ball she'd thrown that night had missed the target. Her room was ridden with scraps of paper and dirty clothes as it usually is whenever she begins her writing process.
"What good is being a pro level romance writer if I can't make an actual romance letter in real life?" She yanked her long hair out of their double buns and buried her fingers in it, frustratedly trying to think of something to write.
"Aaaaahhh..." she groaned folded her arms on top of her desk and laid her head down, taking a look around her room.
Her eyes roamed from the half rolled up socks on the floor to the Skitty TV on it's matching stand to the messy piles of manga spilling out of her partly open closet.
"Brrrreak time..." she muttered, melting out of her wooden chair and crawling over to manga haven.
Sticking her arm inside and rummaging around, she pulled out a newer, still plastic wrapped volume of her favorite romance story, The World Arceus Only Knows. Rosa ripped off the feeble covering that dared stand between her and her admittedly guilty pleasure. No one could find out that Unova renowned Rosa White was actually just a nerdy weeaboo. They'd take away her upcoming movie deal for sure! And probably egg her house or something. Whatever society does to geeks nowadays.
Rosa found herself completely lost in the graphic novel before long and the minutes quickly passed.
She snapped out of her stupor when a soft knocking came from her door.
"Rosa, honey?" Her mom called, "Your editor's on the phone. He says he wants to speak with you about your last manuscript for... what was it again? ...Ah, okay. He says it's for The Pidgeys and the Combees!"
Rosa flung open her door, blushing, and grabbed the phone from her mother while muttering a small thanks and slamming the door closed behind her.
"I want to change that embarrassing name right now please." she spoke into the receiver.
"We have to change more than that, kid. I've been calling your cellphone for the past eternity now where have you been? We've still got a lot of work to do..." the voice at the other end of the phone droned on and on, scolding Rosa for this and that for an hour.
"Yes... Okay... Yeah I'll get right on it, no distractions. Yes sir, goodbye." Rosa finally hit the End Call button on the phone and let it clatter to the floor. Her forehead was getting to know the cool wood of the desk quite well. She slowly lifted her head and moaned at the digital Porygon print clock on the wall above her that displayed 12:01 A.M. in bright pink numbers.
"Bedtime finally." She slowly gathered the energy to push herself up out of her chair and lugged her body onto her bed where she made facial contact with very uncomfortable pink balls of stationary.
"Uuuugggahhh..." she cried out, face twisting into an expression that looked on the verge of tears.
She jerked herself out of bed and slammed her butt down into the seat. "Okay! Let's get this over with!"
She grabbed a sheet of paper and took a pencil to it, writing with renewed vigor, possibly derived from the desire to sleep. Her pencil flew across the page as she strung together words better than she ever had before. Truly this love letter was her greatest work ever.
She finished near the end of the page, signing it with a 'With love and forever yours, Dawn Diamond' in fancy cursive. Not breaking her stride she thrust her hand out and grabbed a light blue envelope that she folded the letter into and sealed with a Luvdisc sticker.
She briefly thought about coating it with a light glitter finish but decided it wasn't worth the month's worth of washing it would take to rid herself of it all.
She leaned back in her chair, hit the ground, and backwards tumbled into her bed and wriggled under the sheets.
Bedtime.
–
The next morning, Rosa sighed as she sat on the steps of Aspertia High School in wait of her late friend, as usual.
"I'm gonna light a fire under Dawn's ass if she doesn't start getting here sooner..." Rosa grumbled and leaned back. She yelped as her head connected with an upper step.
"That looked like it hurt." came a girl's laugh.
Rosa sat back up, rubbing her head to see the famous Roxie from the music group Koffing and the Toxics covering her mouth in an attempt to stifle more giggles. Following her were a horde of boys and girls vying for her attention. Roxie had to make to trip from Virbank to Aspertia everyday and she always got mobbed daily. It'd be too much to deal with, Rosa thought.
"'Scuse me, Rosa." she smiled.
Rosa smiled back and waved, as was the morning routine.
Roxie then jumped up the steps and disappeared into the school followed by her horde not losing any momentum whatsoever as they hopped up the stairs, some even throwing Rosa a look as if to say 'What makes you so special, huh?'
"I guess rock star fame trumps author fame every time." Rosa said under her breath.
"Rosaaaa!" Dawn's voice called out as she ran through the gates and into the schoolyard. "Sorry I'm late! There was a Slakoth stuck in a tree and I had to, like, go and uh...get... it?"
"Save your excuses for next time you're late to classes. You obviously don't have many of 'em." Rosa handed over the pink envelope. "Don't lose it, alright?"
Dawn's eyes lit up and she squealed in delight, snatching the letter. "Thankyouthankyouthankyou! I know it'll work now!"
"Don't get your hopes, now." Rosa warned. "You never know what could happen." But her advice fell on deaf ears as Dawn danced up the steps with all the grace of a Spinda.
"And don't tell anyone about this!" Rosa called to her.
Dawn froze in her dizzy dancing tracks.
"Y-Yeah! Of course not..." she avoided eye contact.
"Dawn..."
"..."
"..."
Dawn took off up the rest of the stairs and bolted down the hall.
"DAWN." Rosa fumed.
She felt a hand grasp her shoulder from behind.
"Rosa! Hi how are you!" a voice came from a shorter girl. "You may not know me but my name is Melinda and I had a favor I wanted to as-"
"I'm not writing you a love letter." Rosa stated flatly.
"O-Oh... I just... Dawn said you helped her out and I was really desperate for a letter since I don't know how to really do one..." Melinda sadly stroked her brown pigtails and looked down at the ground.
Rosa winced. Dealing with sad people wasn't really her forte. "Well I mean, I really only did that because she was my friends and I really wanted her to succeed-"
"You don't want me to succeed?!" Melinda's face fell even more. "I-I just wanted a special letter from my favorite author ever."
My favorite author ever
Favorite author
The phrase rolled through Rosa's mind over and over, a huge smile forming on her lips. She was a complete sucker for praise like this.
"Hold on, your favorite author, really?" Rosa asked.
Melinda nodded, "I bought your newest book Jynx! The Love Witch the other day and I was gonna get it signed at your next book signing."
"Well! Maybe now you can take your future new significant other with you too! I'll write you a nice letter tonight, don't you fret!"
Melinda beamed at Rosa and they both left for their classes as the bell rang soon after, chattering about romance novels along the way.
So she gave in this time, it's fiiiine. What could possibly go wrong?
–
Everything was going wrong. All week she had been peppered with requests for love letters by girl AND boys and although she had shot each request down at first, they'd continue hassling her throughout the day. Some brave ones would even show up to her house after school with snacks. Her mom had a killer sweet tooth and was all too happy to continue letting them in and long as they fed her.
Rosa was cranking out generic letter after letter, not wanting to disappoint anybody after giving her word. She kept herself afloat saying 'It's great writing practice', 'They said I was their favorite!' and 'Whenever I want to confess to someone I'll be sooo ready', but those could only take her so far.
After the 20th letter she finally had to put her foot down.
"Enough! Fight your own battles! Real love letters come from the heart!" she yelled at 3 classmates who had shown up at her door with confetti cake. "And stop trying to give my mom diabetes!" she added, slamming the door closed before opening it a few seconds later, plucking the cake out of a dismayed school girl's hands, and slamming it shut again.
Dawn has since gotten a pinch in the same spot for each letter. The poor girl.
The day after, Rosa was called into her English teacher's classroom after classes.
"Hello, Mrs. Shirley," said Rosa, taking a seat on the other side of the teacher's desk. "You wanted to talk with me about my grades?"
"Ah, yes!" Mrs. Shirley took her seat and swiveled around to her computer. "Fine grades as always, Miss Romance Writer!" she chuckled.
Rosa gave a polite laugh as well.
"Yes, Miss Love Master!" she continued, smiling.
Rosa returned and awkward giggle. "Yup. That's me."
"Miss Heart Whisperer! Miss I Know All About Love! Miss I've Never Had To Worry About My Husband Not Loving Me Anymore!"
"Uh."
Mrs. Shirley cleared her throat, "Oh excuse me, don't mind me. Anyways, as I've said, your grades are doing just fine."
"Well that's... good" Rosa started nervously gripping her seat.
"Yes... Good... It would be a shame if those grades would maybe... take a small dip, yes?"
"Mrs. Shirley... Are you threatening me? What did I do?"
"Look here, kid. I need one of those special love letters that you've been writing. I heard about it from one of the students whispering about it in class."
"Goodbye." Rosa closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, grabbing her bag and making a beeline towards the door.
"Wait! I need one of those letters Rosa!"
"You're too old and MARRIED."
"It's a dead-end! My husband won't mind! Rosa! ROSA."
Rosa continued on down the halls and outside behind the school in search of a place where she could just take a break from it all. Sadly this wasn't the place for that as she soon discovered after slipping on an envelope. Cursing audibly, she picked up the familiar looking envelope sealed with and even more familiar Luvdisc sticker.
"No way." Rosa grimaced.
After searching around for where it might have dropped from, Rosa found another envelope on the ground. And another. All of them the ones she made and leading towards the school dumpster. Rosa steadily picked up the fallen letters until she heard a voice coming from nearby.
"You gottem' all didn't you, Nicky?" a female voice asked
"Prolly." came a more masculine voice. "Haha! Listen to this one, sounds straight outta one of those comic books! 'My heart yearns for you and burns with the passion of a Blaziken's Overheat!"
Rosa stepped where she could get a clearer view of the two people. Sitting against the dumpster and hollering with laughing were the two other members of Roxie's Koffing and the Toxics band, Nicky and Billy Jo. Rosa dropped the letters she had picked up in surprise.
"Dude! Dude! Check this one out!" Nicky opened another letter from the pile in his lap and chucked the old one over his head into the trash. "Whenever you look into my eyes I'm trapped like I've been attacked by a Fire Spin! Gahahaha! It's just the same ol' letter two times in a row! What are they teaching kids nowadays because it ain't good poetry!"
"Oi!" Billy Jo socked Nicky in the arm and pointed at the dumbfounded and red faced Rosa. "Ya missed some ya idjit."
"Aw shit." Nicky muttered, standing up and dusting himself off. "Yo pass those letters over here, huh?"
"You guys..." Rosa clenched her fists, visibly shaking with anger. Tears welled up in her eyes.|
"Wait no, don't cry hold up, uh..." Nicky threw a panicked look back at Billy Jo who was making her way over as well.
"'Ey now, no tears. You wanna come read sum wiffus? So corny it's guaranteed to make ya smile."
Billy Jo laid a hand on Rosa's shoulder witch Rosa smacked away.
Rosa had hit her boiling point.
"Who are you assholes to judge what good writing is?!" Rosa erupted.
Taken by surprise, Billy Jo and Nicky took a step back, Rosa followed.
"Love letters should be treated with the utmost respect! Someone had to slave away putting their emotions on paper to give to the one they like! Love letters don't deserve to be laughed at and treated like Magikarp Crap! Why do you even HAVE THOSE?"
"Heh...Magikrap" Nicky laughed at his own pun. Fatal mistake. Rosa swarmed upon him and prodded his chest.
"Don't you dare laugh! I bet you're just upset because your chrome dome keeps any possible suitor at bay like a Flash attack! I'm surprised I haven't gone blind yet!"
"Oi oi, hold on a minute, love! Maybe there's a bit of a misunderstanding here... You see these were all in our friend's lock-" Billy Jo tried to break in and save Nicky from his flaying.
Rosa turned her glare upon her, "Don't even think about trying to justify him! And drop that disgustingly fake accent! I can't even tell what that is."
Billy Jo and Nicky took a few more steps back looking like they were about to bail when they bumped into someone behind them.
"Uh, ah, R-Roxie!" Nicky stuttered. "We were just on our way back!"
"You guys were supposed to meet me in the practice room forever ago!" Roxie frowned. "What are you dummies doing out here?"
"This crazy chick just came outta nowhere and came at us, man!" Nicky pointed at Rosa who was wiping her eyes and crushing the letters she brought into the ground with her heel.
"Let's just go, guys." Billy Jo said, pushing Nicky and Roxie towards the practice room. "This is pointless anyways."
"Wait." Roxie dug her heels into the ground and walked over to the pile of envelopes in front of the dumpster.
"Oh no no, wait that's just trash!" Nicky shouted
Rosa shot him an angry look and he shut his mouth.
Roxie kneeled and took one of the random envelopes and opened them up. "You're sweeter than a Swirlix, I just can't wait to hold you in my arms and give you a Sweet Kiss..." Roxie's ears flushed red.
"This sure is somethin'." Roxie turned to face Rosa. "You write all this? For me?
"Yeah but- Not really- I mean- It's not like I wrote them for you or anything! I-I think!" Rosa started rambling, also starting to blush.
Roxie smirked, an obvious blush radiating from her face as she tried to keep cool.
"I knew that I'd been getting a bunch of letters lately but I never opened them so I never thought they were from you."
"They were all in the same kinda envelope and seal so y'know, me and Billy Jo thought some creeper sent em so we was gonna have some fun wit-Ow!" Nicky's explanation was cut short by a pinch and stern look from Billy Jo that said 'Not fuckin' now, you git.'
"And some are only similar because, like, I wrote so many and they kinda just start to blur and-" Rosa continued to ramble.
"So you... wanna hang out together sometime?" Roxie asked, twirling a lock of her hair
"What." Rosa uttered.
"You could come listen to my band play... I mean if you wanna, you ain't gotta. We could always-"
"Wait. Please wait, I'm honestly so confused right now." Rosa said, clutching her head.
"Does that mean no?" Roxie asked, actually looking heartbroken.
"No! I mean you're super cute but like- Are you really okay with me anyway? We never really talked much."
"Yeah! Actually I'd been wanting to really talk you for a while but with everybody chasing me all day and you being mobbed by people lately I never really got the chance... I've been followin' your novels from the start too." Roxie sheepishly rubbed the back of her head.
"Y-You read romance novels? My novels?" Rosa stared, mouth agape.
"Yeah, I mean I know I don't seem like the type but I'm a sucker for that kinda stuff deep down... Ugh, this is so embarrassing!" She covered half of her face with a hand. "L-Let's just pick this up tomorrow or something!" she quickly turned back around and briskly walked away, dragging Billy Jo and Nicky with her. "I-I'll text you or something!" she called back.
"Wait!" Rosa shouted reaching out. "She doesn't even have my number..." she said, lowering her arm.
Rosa stood still for quite some time after, attempting to reflect on what exactly had just happened. Surely if she went through the events once more she'd understand every thing.
EVENT NUMBER 1: Her good friend Dawn proposed the idea of helping write a love letter for herself! An innocent idea, how cute.
EVENT NUMBER 2: Dawn blabs about it to the entire school. Less cute.
EVENT NUMBER 3: Rosa ends up bogged down writing letters for the entire student body and borders on the edge of mental insanity on par with Porygon Z
EVENT NUMBER 4: Rosa smacks Dawn repeatedly. This isn't really an event but it made her feel a lot better about it all.
EVENT NUMBER 5: Rosa finds out that most or every single letter has been going to local rock star Roxie, lead member of Koffing and the Toxics
EVENT NUMBER 6: Roxie mistakes Rosa for being the one who sent all of these letters because she wrote them
POSSIBLE EVENT NUMBER 7: Rosa now gets to date Roxie and live happily ever rich- I mean happy.
Honestly, even after explaining this was pretty out there.
"Rosa!" Dawn burst through the back door. "I'm finally gonna do it, Rosa!" Dawn ran up to her currently lost in thought friend. "It's taken me all week but I think that last smack you gave me released the pent up courage to finally tell Roxie how I feel!"
"..."
"Rosa? Helloooo?"
Rosa reached out and grabbed Dawn in a tight hug. "Dawn, I don't know if you deserve this but thank you."
"Awww! Thanks Rosa!" Dawn returned the hug. "But really have you seen Roxie? Is she in the practice room agai-Hrk! R-Rosa your hug is getting tighter... I just need to go ove-HNNNNG!"
"Trust me, just let this one go, friend."