*Not every quest and side quest will be included. Only the ones directly relevant to the main storyline will be (maybe a handful of side quests too). Some of the quests and dialogue are modified to fit the story format better.
Prologue
"And so is the Golden City blackened
With each step you take in my Hall.
Marvel at its perfection, for it is fleeting.
You have brought Sin to Heaven,
And doom upon all the world." –Canticle of Threnodies 8:13
[As told by Duncan]
The Chantry teaches us that it is the hubris of men which brought the darkspawn into our world. The mages had sought to usurp Heaven, but instead they destroyed it. They were cast out, twisted and cursed by their own corruption. They returned as monsters…the first of the darkspawn. They became a blight upon the land; unstoppable and relentless.
The dwarven kingdoms were the first to fall. And from the Deep Roads, the darkspawn drove at us again and again until finally, we neared annihilation…until one day, the Grey Wardens came. Men and women from every race, warriors and mages, barbarians and kings…the Grey Wardens sacrificed everything to stem the tide of darkness…and prevailed.
It has been four centuries since that victory and we have kept our vigil. We have watched and waited for the darkspawn to return. But those who once called us heroes have forgotten. We are few now and our warnings have been ignored for too long. It may even be too late, for I have seen with my own eyes what lies on the horizon.
Maker…help us all.
Chapter One
"Maker, my enemies are abundant.
Many are those who rise up against me.
But my faith sustains me; I shall not fear the legion,
Should they set themselves against me."
-Canticle of Trials, 1:1
I entered the main hall. Father had summoned me, so I imagined whatever he wanted to speak to me about it had to be something important, otherwise he wouldn't have called me from my training session.
When I opened the door, I saw that he had company. He was speaking with Arl Rendon Howe, who had a handful of knights with him. I stopped in my tracks and stood by the door, waiting for them to finish talking. It would be impolite to interrupt.
"….I'll send my eldest off with my men. You and I will ride tomorrow, just like the old days." Father was saying. He had his hands clasped behind his back and he was faced away from the arl. He was staring into the fire blazing inside the hearth.
"True. But we both had less gray in our hair then…and we fought Orlesians, not monsters." Arl Howe murmured.
Father turned around to face the arl. "At least the smell will be the same." He replied.
Both he and Howe started laughing. At that moment, Father spotted me by the door. He and his guest stopped laughing.
"I'm sorry pup I didn't see you there. Howe, you remember my daughter Aveline, don't you?"
"I see that she's become a lovely young woman," Arl Howe said. "Pleased to see you again, my dear."
I shuddered inwardly. There was something about that man that made me uncomfortable. I knew he and Father had been friends for years, but I never did like him. He looked too devious and haughty to me, and had always been rather abrasive. He wasn't calm and composed like the nobles I was used to seeing.
"And you, Arl Howe." I said.
"My son Thomas asked after you. Perhaps I should bring him with me next time?" Arl Howe said.
Ugh, I'm not up for a political relationship. I refuse to be pawned off just because it suits him. I thought. Just be polite. I doubt he'll even follow through with it anyways.
"I'd like that." I replied.
"Excellent," Arl Howe said. "He saw you at a Denerim fair and has talked about you ever since. He'll be pleased you remember him."
Such an idiot, I thought. I wouldn't touch one of your offspring with a ten foot pole!
"At any rate pup, I've summoned you for a reason. While your brother and I are away, I'm leaving you in charge of the castle." Father said.
I felt my heart skip a beat. The prospect made me both apprehensive and thrilled. Running a castle was a huge responsibility. Father must have faith in me if he seriously wanted to leave it in my hands in his absence.
"I'll do my best, Father." I said.
"Now that's what I like to hear. Only a token force is remaining here and you must keep peace in the region. You know what they say about mice when the cat is away…anyways, there's someone I want you to meet," Father said. "Please show Duncan in."
A couple of guards that had been standing nearby left the chamber. A few seconds later, they reappeared with a strange man I'd never seen before in my life. He had long dark hair that was tied back. His beard and moustache were neatly trimmed and he appeared to be middle aged. By the looks of his armor, weapons, and his poise, I could see that he was someone important.
The guards returned to their posts and the strange man approached us. I saw Arl Howe's lip twitch a little when the man came up beside of him.
"It is an honor to be a guest within your hall, Teyrn Cousland." The man said. His voice was much deeper and firmer than Father's or Arl Howe's.
"Your Lordship, you didn't mention that a Grey Warden would be present." Arl Howe said.
A Grey Warden? I thought. Why did Father invite him here?
"Duncan arrived just recently, unannounced. Is there a problem?" Father asked.
"Of course not. But a guest of this stature demands certain protocol. I'm at a disadvantage." Arl Howe responded.
Did I imagine it, or had there been a hint of snide in the arl's voice?
"We rarely have the pleasure of seeing one in person, that's true," Father said. He then turned to me. "Pup, Brother Aldous has taught you who the Grey Wardens are, I hope?"
"Yes. He said they're an order of great warriors." I said.
"They're the heroes of legend. They have ended the past Blights and saved us all. Duncan is looking for recruits before joining us and his fellow Wardens in the south. I believe he has his eye on Ser Gilmore." He said.
"If I might be so bold, I might suggest that your daughter is also an excellent candidate." Duncan suddenly said.
Father stiffened. He stared at Duncan for a moment, looking affronted.
"An honor that may be, this is my daughter we're talking about," Father said, stepping in front of me. His tone had quickly become heated, which I found rather peculiar.
Curious…why wouldn't he want me to become a Grey Warden? I thought. It's not like I'm going to be the one receiving the teyrnir.
"Is there a reason why I shouldn't become a Grey Warden, Father?" I asked.
"You did just finish saying that Grey Wardens are heroes, old friend." Arl Howe said.
"I've not so many children that I'll gladly see them all off to battle," Father responded sharply. "So unless you intend to invoke the Right of Conscription, Duncan, I will have to decline your offer."
"Have no fear, we need as many good recruits as we can find, but I have no intentions of forcing the issue." Duncan said.
Upon hearing that, Father relaxed a little. He let out a small sigh and then returned his attention to me.
"Pup, can you ensure that Duncan's requests are seen to while I am gone?" He asked.
"Of course." I replied.
"In the meantime, find Fergus and tell him to lead the troops to Ostagar ahead of me." He said. "He should be upstairs in his chamber, no doubt. He's spending his last moments with his wife and son. Be a good lass and do as I have asked. We'll talk soon."
"Yes Father." I muttered.
I glanced at Duncan one last time and headed towards the door. As I walked back outside, I started to wonder if there had been a deeper reason to why Father wouldn't allow me to become a Grey Warden.
Perhaps there is more to the Grey Wardens than the little myths and legends I've heard growing up. I thought. Well, thanks to Father I will never know what it's like to become one. I will have to be content with my life here…whatever that might bring. I just hope I don't regret this the rest of my life.
XXXXX
I took my time going to find my older brother. If he was spending time with his wife and son, and I didn't want to disturb them. I hadn't planned on rushing up there to begin with.
While I walked, I wondered what it would be like to be a Grey Warden. I imagined myself fighting alongside Duncan and his warriors. I was so lost in thought that I didn't even notice Ser Gilmore, one Father's knights, approach me.
"There you are!" Ser Gilmore said. He had bright red hair and had a pale complexion. Compared to most of the other knights, he was rather handsome.
"Your mother told me the teyrn had summoned you, so I didn't want to interrupt." He said.
"Well hello to you too, Ser Gilmore," I said. "Why are you looking for me?"
"Ha! Sorry for my abruptness. I've been looking all over the castle for you. I fear your hound has the kitchen in uproar again. Nan is threatening to leave." He said.
"She was my nanny before she was the cook. Nan won't leave." I said, rolling my eyes. This wasn't the first time she had threatened to leave and I doubted it would be the last time.
"Your mother disagrees. She insists you collect your dog and quickly," He replied. "But you know mabari hounds. They'll listen to their masters but anyone else risks having an arm bitten off."
"He knows better than to hurt anyone." I murmured.
He shook his head. "I'm not willing to test that. You're quite lucky to have your own mabari hound, you know. They're smart enough not to talk, my father used to say. Of course, that means he's easily bored. Nan swears that he confounds her just to amuse himself. At any rate, your mother would have me accompany you until the matter is settled. Shall we?" He said.
He was starting to look impatient, so I figured it was best not to stand around and argue with him. There were worse things to endure than having him accompany me. It would only take me a few minutes to round up my dog anyways.
"Before we go, may I ask you something?" He inquired.
"Yes?" I said.
"Is it true that a Grey Warden is here?" He said.
"Yes. His name is Duncan. I met him myself." I said.
"Is it true then that he's asking after me?" He asked.
"He intends to test you to see if you're worthy of becoming a Grey Warden." I answered.
At that moment, he looked like he was about to die of happiness. His blue eyes shone brightly and a huge smile crossed his face. I suppressed a chuckle of amusement. I imagined it was thrilling to be sought after by Grey Wardens. From what I understood, only the best of the best were even considered for such a prestigious status. I was envious.
"Maker's breath! I can't believe this! Me? A Grey Warden? Er, pardon my outburst…I'm getting ahead of myself. We ought to get going." He stammered.
Lucky. I wish I were getting testing for recruitment. But no! I won't ever get to know the glory of being a Grey Warden. I thought. I'll have to settle for a lame life of living in the castle.
The two of us made our way to the kitchen. As I walked, I imagined how Nan screeching at my dog, flinging every insult under the sun at him. Ever since I received him from Father, she had been trying to get me and my parents to get rid of him. I knew she had little love for dogs and mine was no exception. The fact that he always got into the larder on made it harder for me to convince my parents to let me keep him.
Before I even entered the kitchen, I could hear Nan screaming at her two elven servants, who were cowering in terror. She sounded absolutely livid, just as I had imagined she would be. She absolutely despised it when my hound got anywhere near her kitchen.
"Get that bloody mutt out of the larder!" Nan bellowed.
"But mistress, it won't let us near!" The female elf whimpered.
"If I can't get into the larder, I will skin both of you useless elves, I swear it!" Nan screeched.
"Er, calm down good woman. We've come to help." Ser Gilmore said.
Nan rounded on us, eyes were blazing. "You! And you! Your bloody mongrel keeps getting into my larder! That beast should be put down!" She roared.
"I'm sorry he keeps bothering you, Nan." I said.
She heaved a sigh. "Just get him gone! I've got enough to worry about with a castle full of hungry soldiers!" She said. She then turned back to her servants. "You two, stop standing there like idiots. Get out of the way!"
The two elven servants scurried off. By the look in their eyes, I could see that they were furious. I felt sorry for them; I imagined they received tirades from Nan on a daily basis.
Ser Gilmore and I went back to the larder. As soon as we did, I saw my hound sniffing around and barking. Bags and boxes were strewn about, contents spilled and trampled on. I
"Look at this mess. How did he even get in here?" Ser Gilmore sighed.
When he saw me, his short tail started wagging. He came over to me and stared up at me. He was barking excitedly.
"Zeke? Are you trying to tell me something, boy?" I asked.
He started barking and spinning around in circles.
"It does seem like he's trying to tell you something." Ser Gilmore said.
I started to respond until I heard faint scuffling noises. Ser Gilmore must have heard it too, because he put his hand on his blade.
"Wait…do you hear that?" He whispered.
No sooner had he said that, large rats started to appear. Their beady eyes gleamed with bloodlust and they bared their teeth. They were razor sharp and they were at least five times as big as any rat I'd ever encountered before.
Zeke went ballistic. He sank his teeth into the nearest rat and shook it fiercely. I unsheathed my twin short swords and sliced a rat that leapt at me, while Ser Gilmore drew his sword and joined the fight.
More and more rats streamed out of nowhere. Every time I killed one, two more would take its place.
I'm not about to be defeated by some overgrown rats! I thought, hacking and slashing through the horde. Bright red blood sprayed me with every rat I felled. Bodies were quickly piling up on the floor.
Suddenly, the throng of rats disappeared as quickly as it had appeared. The larder was in even worse condition now than it had been before. Dead rats and blood were everywhere, on top of destroyed supplies. Nan was going to be irate when she saw this grisly scene.
I sheathed my swords and checked Zeke for any injuries. His short brown fur was coated in blood, but it wasn't his own. I was relieved that none of the rats had bitten him.
"Giant rats? It's like the beginning of every bad adventure tale my grandfather use to tell me," Ser Gilmore mumbled. "Your hound must have chased them into their holes…he wasn't raiding the larder after all. Those were rats from the Korcari Wilds."
"I suppose we ought to tell Nan what happened." I said.
"Er…I don't know. Perhaps we ought not to tell her about the rats? She's upset as it is." He replied.
"She'll see this mess anyways," I said. "We didn't kill all of them, so they're going to come back eventually. We might as well let her know."
Ser Gilmore let out a long sigh. He still looked reluctant, but didn't argue the issue anymore.
"Well, now that you have your hound under control, I will leave you be. I'm to prepare for the arrival of more of the arl's men." He said. He departed hastily.
I was glad that Ser Gilmore had left. I didn't hate him but I certainly didn't enjoy being chaperoned. I wasn't a child anymore and I didn't need to be treated like one.
When Zeke and I returned to the kitchen, Nan was standing a few feet away with her back towards us. As soon as we entered the kitchen, she turned around and glared at us.
"There he is, brazen as can be," Nan hissed. "Licking his chops after helping himself to the roast, no doubt!"
"He was defending the larder from the rats, actually." I said.
The two elven servants, who had been scrubbing the floors, stopped what they were doing and looked up at us. Their eyes widened with terror.
"Rats? Not the large grey ones!" The female elven servant gasped.
"They'll rip you to shreds. They will!" The male elven servant cried.
Nan rolled her eyes and let out an exasperated sigh. "See, now you have gone and scared the servants. I expect those filthy things are dead?" She said.
"Indeed. My faithful war hound ensured that it's safe." I said.
"I bet that dog let those rats in there to begin with!" She remarked.
Zeke stared whining and eyeing her sadly. I knew that look well enough.
"Don't even start with the sad eyes. I'm immune to your so-called charms." She growled.
He whined again and his eyes grew bigger.
"Fine, here then. Don't ever say that Nan never gives you anything. Bloody dog." She muttered, giving Zeke a handful of pork bits.
He barked happily and gobbled up the pork bits.
"Thanks milady. Now we can get back to work," Nan said. She then glared at her two elven servants. "That's right you two. Stop standing about!"
Zeke and I left the kitchen. I could still hear Nan barking at the two elves as I was walking away.
I suppose I better go find Fergus now. I thought. I hope I don't walk in on a sentimental moment between him and his family.
I went off to find my older brother and deliver Father's message to him. When I passed through the atrium, I came across Mother. She was conversing with Lady Landra, her son and her lady-in-waiting. Lady Landra's son, Dairren, had short reddish-brown hair who was about my age. Her lady-in-waiting was a lovely elven woman with long, silky blonde hair.
"…and my dear Bryce brought this back from Orlais last year. The marquis who gave it to him was drunk and mistook Bryce for the king!" Mother was saying.
Mother and Lady Landra broke out laughing. When Mother spotted me, she fell silent. Lady Landra and Dairren followed Mother's gaze over to me. Dairren's face visibly reddened when his gaze met mine.
"Ah, here is my lovely daughter, Aveline. I take it by the presence of that troublesome hound of yours that the situation in the kitchen was handled?" Mother said.
"Yes Mother. Nan is back to work as we speak." I replied.
"You have always had a way with her," She said. "Darling, you remember Lady Landra, Bann Loren's wife?"
"I think we last met at your Mother's spring salon." Lady Landra added.
"Of course. It's good to see you again, my lady." I said.
"You're too kind dear. Didn't I spend half of the salon trying to convince you to marry my son?" Lady Landra replied.
"And you made a very poor case for it, might I add." Dairren grumbled.
Lady Landra ignored her son's comment. "You remember my son Dairren, don't you? He's not married yet either." She said.
"Don't listen to her…it's good to see you again, milady. You're looking as beautiful as ever." Dairren said.
"Thank you Dairren," I replied, smiling warmly. "You're looking handsome as well."
I saw Dairren's face redden and he smiled back nervously.
"And this is my lady-in-waiting, Iona." Lady Landra said, indicating towards the blonde elf. She had the most stunning blue eyes I'd ever seen in my life and the most gorgeous hair.
I wish humans were at least half as attractive as elves. I thought. That would be something!
Iona stood there, avoiding my gaze. She looked ill at ease. I could hardly blame her. It must be awkward to be the only elf in a group of humans.
"Please do say something, dear." Lady Landra urged.
"I'm pleased to meet you, milady," Iona said timidly. "You are as pretty as your mother describes."
"You would think that would make it easier to make a match for her, not more difficult!" Mother exclaimed.
"Perhaps your daughter simply has a mind of her own, your Ladyship. You should be proud." Dairren said.
"Proud doesn't get me any more grandchildren." Mother remarked.
I groaned inwardly. There is more to life than getting married and having a family! I thought.
"May I go now, Mother?" I asked. "Father asked me to deliver a message to Fergus."
"Right. Don't let me keep you any longer." Mother said.
"I think perhaps I shall rest now, my dear. Dairren, I will see you and Iona at supper." Lady Landra said.
Mother and Landra walked off in opposite directions, while Iona trailed behind Landra. I started to leave too until Dairren blocked my path.
"It was nice seeing you again, milady. You're even more beautiful now than you were the last time we met." He said.
I smiled pleasantly at him. He wasn't the most attractive man I'd ever seen before, but he wasn't the worst either. He had a scholarly air about him that made him charming in a unique way.
"I don't have much time to talk now. Perhaps we can talk more later?" I said.
"I would like that a lot." Dairren smiled.
"Until we speak again." I said.
I could feel Dairren's gaze burning into me as I walked away. I quickened my pace until I reached my family's quarters. Hopefully, no one else would bother me. I couldn't squander any more time.
Upon arrival, I saw Fergus talking to his wife and son out in the hallway. Fergus's wife Oriana looked distraught while their son jumped around enthusiastically.
"Is there really going to be a war, Papa? Will you bring me back a sword?" Oren asked.
"Yes Oren. I will get you the mightiest one I can find," Fergus replied. "I'll be back before you know it."
"I wish victory was so certain…my heart is disquiet." Oriana said. She sounded like she was on the verge of tears.
"Don't frighten the boy, love. I speak the truth." Fergus said.
I stood in the doorway, uncertain whether to make my presence known. I had hoped that I wouldn't walk in on their sappy moment, but unfortunately, I did.
I can't imagine having a spouse fussing over me and smothering me with their affection, and a child depending on me. The mere thought makes me want to gag. I thought.
Just when I was about to go back into the hallway, Fergus spotted me.
"And here is my little sister to see me off. Dry your eyes love and wish me well." Fergus said.
"Er, should I wait outside?" I asked.
"Stay. I would like to say farewell." He said.
"You will be missed, brother." I murmured.
"If it's any consolation, I'm sure I will freeze in the southern rains and be completely jealous of you up here all dry and warm." He responded.
"I'm positively thrilled that you will be so miserable, my husband." Oriana muttered.
"Before I forget, Father wanted me to tell you to leave without him." I said.
"Then the arl's men are delayed," He sighed. "You would think that all of his men were walking backwards…well I guess I better get on my way. So many darkspawn to behead, so little time. Off I go then. I will see you soon enough, my love."
Fergus leaned forwards and kissed his wife. He then kissed his son on the forehead. Seconds later, Father and Mother entered the chamber.
"I would hope that you planned to wait for us before taking off, dear boy." Father said.
"Be well my son. I will pray for your safety every day that you are gone." Mother said.
"I'm sure he will be fine, Mother." I murmured.
"Make preserve us all…may you return all our husbands, sons and fathers to us safely." Oriana said.
"And bring us some ale and wenches while you're at it! For the men, of course." Fergus laughed.
"Fergus! You would say this in front of your mother?" Oriana gasped.
"What's a wench? Is that what you pull on to get the bucket out of the well?" Oren asked.
"A wench is a woman who serves ale in a tavern, Oren…or a woman who drinks a lot of ale." Father responded.
"Bryce! Maker's breath…it's like living with a pair of small boys. Thankfully I have a daughter." Mother exclaimed.
"I'll miss you dear mother. You will take care of her, won't you sister?" Fergus said.
"Of course. You can count on me." I responded.
"It's nice to know that I will be so safe." Mother said.
"Indeed," Father said. He then turned to me. "Pup, you will want to get in bed early tonight. You have much to do tomorrow."
"Right." I said.
My parents, Fergus, Oriana, and Oren went off to eat supper. I took my time getting there. I wasn't particularly hungry. My stomach was in knots from my anxiety and excitement about running the castle by myself.
I ate my supper quickly and quietly. Despite the fact I had to get up early tomorrow morning, I had no intentions on going straight to bed. Perhaps I could go to the study by the library to do a little reading to calm my nerves? I'd never be able to go to sleep
I made my way to the study. On my way there, I thought about what book I wanted to read tonight. History and legends had always been my favorite tomes to read. I especially liked reading about the Dalish, magic, and dragons.
I slipped into the study and went to the bookshelf. I started browsing the shelves, looking for a book about the Tevinter Imperium.
In my eagerness to find a book, I didn't notice Dairren enter the study. His sudden appearance startled me. I thought that he would've been in bed by now, like everyone else.
"Hello again," Your castle's study is quite marvelous. Might I ask whose collection this is?" Dairren said.
"It's my grandfather's." I said.
"He was something of a scholar right? Wasn't he interested in magical studies?" He asked.
"Indeed. I am interested in magic myself. Are you?" I said.
"Not per se. Books are my passion," He replied. "Years ago, I wanted to join the Chantry as a scholar but my father wouldn't hear it."
"My father and I don't always agree either." I murmured.
"I'm my father's heir…so I'm used to putting duty first. No doubt you have experienced that?" He said.
"Certainly. I wanted to ride of with my father and brother, but I'm stuck here at the castle," I sighed. "I heard you were getting to ride with them, though."
"Yes, but I don't know when. I guess whenever your father does. I'll ride as his second…a glorified squire more or less. I'll care for his horse, armor, and such. It's quite an honor!" He said, rolling his eyes.
"Will you get to fight?" I asked.
"I hope so. I admit trepidation about having to fight the darkspawn, though. But I can't imagine an opponent more worthy of defeat." He said.
"Do you consider it an honor to do menial tasks for my father?" I inquired.
As soon as I had said that, I wished I could take my words back. He angrily narrowed his eyes at me.
"Unlike you, I'm not a child of a great house. If I can rise within the ranks of your father's army, it's more than I can normally hope for." He remarked.
I winced a little, cursing myself for not being more tactful. Of course he wouldn't consider doing menial tasks an honor. Who the hell would?! I doubted even the elves like it.
He must have seen the shame in my eyes, because his gaze softened.
"I'm a bit surprised that you're not riding alongside your brother. Do you find that disappointing?" He asked.
"Yes…but I have important duties here at the castle." I said.
"True enough," He conceded. "This is no small estate like my own. If you are interested, I can record my experiences in the battle. My writing skills aren't that great, but I hope to convey the true experience of a warrior. Writing such an important work is one of my ambitions."
"That sounds lovely," I said. I smiled enthusiastically, hoping to make him feel better. "But tell me…do you know anything about the Grey Wardens?"
"No more than anyone else. Is it true that there's one here in the castle? Have you met him?" He asked.
His eyes were shining with such an intense eagerness. I thought it was adorable. I figured I might as well indulge him. I made me feel good to make others happy, even if it wasn't in a special way.
"It's true. I have met him." I said.
"I'd join the Grey Warden's in a heartbeat! Can you imagine, destroying the darkspawn forever and becoming a hero?" He exclaimed. His brief moment of excitement faded away and was replaced by sorrow. "Of course, I'd never be able to gain a Grey Warden's notice. I'll have to be happy under your father's command."
I placed my hand on his shoulder. When I did, he blushed.
"Don't give your hopes up so quickly, Dairren. There will be Grey Wardens at the battle. Perhaps if you impress one, they will recruit you?"
He suddenly took my hands in his, which startled me. It had been a while since a man was bold enough to make a move on me.
"And what about you? Do you have any interest in joining the fabled Grey Wardens?" He asked.
"Well…I…would like to join myself, but my father forbids it." I said.
Rather than responding, he pressed his lips against mine. There was an intensity in his kiss that I found unsettling.
He kissed me several times before I was able to regain my senses. When we broke apart, we were both left breathless.
"Perhaps we should go somewhere more private? Like my bedchamber." I breathed.
"As you wish." He panted.
The two of us went into my bedchamber and I locked the door behind us. As soon as I turned around, he pinned me against the door and slipped his hand into my pants.
I wasn't sure why, but I suddenly became overwhelmed with desire for him. I actually wanted this. I grabbed him and started rubbing him, he rolled his eyes and moaned.
The next thing I knew, we were undressing each other and having sex. This wasn't the first time for me, but this was certainly the most passionate sex I'd ever had. I could tell he loved me just by the way he looked at me and embraced me. It was both disturbing and sweet to me.
XXXXX
Dairren and I lied in bed together. I laid my head on his muscular chest and caressed him with my fingertips. I had to admit, I'd never really paid much attention to him before, despite the fact that him and his mother visited my mother often. But now that I noticed him…it somehow felt right to be lying with him. I wasn't already regretting this I had with past experiences. This was something else altogether.
"Aveline…can I tell you something?" He said tentatively.
"Sure." I said.
"That was my first time…er…sleeping with someone." He murmured. He had been so quiet that I wasn't sure I had heard him right.
I lifted my head and looked at him. "It's nothing to be ashamed about." I replied.
"I was saving myself for you," He said. "Ever since I first met you, I dreamed of marrying you. I would always think of ways to get you to notice me…but I was always too nervous to approach you. My mother's spectacle back at your mother's spring salon made me even more afraid to speak with you."
His sudden confession left me speechless. His mother had tried to pair us up before, but I had never really considered it. It shocked me that he actually had feelings for me.
"If you have had feelings for me, why didn't you say anything before?" I asked.
"I was always too nervous too. A lady of your stature would never go after someone like me. I'm just the son of a bann…just a minor lord," He murmured. "I'm nowhere near as important or as interesting as you."
"I never knew you actually had feelings for me. I assumed your mother was trying to marry us just because our mothers are friends and they both want grandchildren." I said.
"Maybe that's what she wants, but not me. If we marry, I want it to be because we want to not because we have to." He said.
I scooted closer to him and kissed him. He grasped me and kissed me with the intense ardor that was burning in his heart.
"Good night Dairren." I said.
"Good night Aveline." He murmured.
I laid my head on his chest and closed my eyes. I felt him scoot a little closer to me and put his arm across me. I let out a little sigh of happiness and drifted off to sleep.