Lemonade

A moment of betrayal leads to a road of self-discovery.

Author Note: The only character I own is the main female fictional character. All references to Lemonade and its tracks are copyright to Beyoncé Knowles-Carter and her affiliated writers.

1. Pray You Catch Me

Three years.

In three years, she never thought it would come down to this. Ear pressed firmly against the mahogany bedroom door as her eyelids fluttered shut over her baby blues.

The emotions washed over her and like waves, they wouldn't stop coming. The freezing cold fear of what might finally come out into the open. The red hot anger, jolted into her senses by his almost piercing lack of loyalty. After all they'd gone through. After all she'd sacrificed to stick by his side. Why?

She heard next to nothing. Mumbles she couldn't quite discern, the occasional echo of a breathy laugh. Seconds and minutes melded into one another as though they were days and months. Her heart was racing and the sound of her blood pumping was making it impossible to hear anything else. Trapped in herself, in her fear.

She imagined him saying all the wrong things, realising he had been caught, swinging the door open, the world war that would be suddenly thrust upon them. Upon their world.

She caught what sounded like an "Okay, bye"... and then nothing. Silence.

Opening her eyes, she peeled herself away from the door and straightened up, hands half-heartedly curled into fists at her sides. She wasn't sure if it was worth the energy to fight; she didn't think she had any left.

In three years, she never thought it would come down to this.

Why?

A trembling pale hand found itself turning the door handle. Mahogany disappeared from in front of her, replaced with the scene of their bedroom. Walls of white, pristine grey carpet under her feet as she took a step inside. Framed photographs of them on the cabinets on either side of their bed, smiling faces taunting her. Back when they had been happy. It seemed so long ago now. Was it a mirage? Had they ever been happy at all?

His bespectacled emerald eyes found hers as he stood on the opposite side of the bed, and she was reminded of just how beautiful he was. His hair was pristine but his facial hair was slightly unkempt, though that was mostly on purpose. He liked it that way. He always did things his way.

There was only silence as they stared at one another, and she was startled by the way the corners of his mouth turned up into a smile. He always had such a beautiful, infectious smile. Was he smiling at her?

She blinked, and realised she had imagined it. Nowadays he only smiled at her in her dreams.

Barely acknowledging her, he placed his phone on the bedside cabinet and proceeded to walk away. He brushed past her, and she was sure he had mumbled something about a shower, although his voice in her head felt like static now. There had been no smile, no sparkle in his eyes, no affection in his words or his actions anymore.

Maybe it's a cause for concern...

A clicking sound signalled the lock of the bathroom door down the hall behind her, and it snapped her back to reality. She reached with both hands to tighten her blonde ponytail, and then in an instant she was across the room. Nausea clawed at her, fear betrayed her with the tremble of her hands as she gripped at his phone, entering the pass code she had spent weeks cautiously trying to discover, feeling like an assassin all the times she had lurked behind him every time he made a phone call or sent a message. But deep down she knew, he had been the real assassin all along.

Menu. Phone. Call log. The same number over and over, under a man's name but she knew better. Back. Menu. Messages. Inbox. The same number. The same words he had once used on her, the same sweetened tones, the same growth and battle and defusion of incredible sexual tension that had once been between just the two of them. Her baby blues betrayed her as they bounced back and forth to read the words in front of them.

I think I'm falling for you.

Those words were her final undoing. Suddenly everything in her line of sight was blurry, drowning in her liquid emotions. Her hands were empty. The phone fell to the floor. So lost as she drowned, her mind hadn't even bothered to register the sound of the bathroom door unlocking.

"Kelsey!"

She dashed past him, grateful that her body had waited until she was out of his sight and inside the bathroom before it betrayed her and she collapsed to the floor in a sobbing heap. She couldn't stop the trembling, it took her three tries to reach up behind her and lock the door. Pulling her knees close to her chest, she struggled to breathe as she wailed. She had been right all along. She wanted the sound of his voice to stop harassing her ears; he had already done enough.

Minutes of him calling her name, pounding his fist on the door, pleading her to speak to him... the minutes felt like eternity as she shook violently with her sobs, grateful for her sudden ability to stop wailing out loud.

And then all at once, he was quiet. The sound of her shaky breaths were suddenly a solo act. She knew he was still there, though. She could still feel his presence on the other side of the door. It wasn't a comforting presence anymore.

Betrayal.

In three years, she never thought it would come down to this.

"What are you doing, my love?"