A/N So, LiveJournal was being stupid and taking ages to load, or just not load at all. Which, by the way, is just perfect, because I have so much to catch up on over on 206_Bones. Anyway, I felt like writing, and my Bones story was just stuck, so this random idea came to mind. It's Addison/Derek. I don't know what made me write this, I just did. It's set somewhere in the future. Addison and Derek run into each other in New York. Addison's POV. By the way, pretend the cross-overs never happened.
Disclaimer: Oh, I got plenty o' nuttin', an' nuttin's plenty fo' me... Grey's Anatomy isn't mine. Neither is that song. I do like the song, though...
For Zoe (satan-wears-prada). Love you hin.
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I never liked New York in the summer. The heat was always overpowering, and the AC never had a high enough setting to be even remotely comfortable. I'd spend weeks living on iced tea and ice-cream, somehow getting through each surgery-filled day without my usual caffeine fix. I'm still unsure how I did that.
The heat hit me as I stepped out of the cab, and I took a deep breath. I used the magazine I'd bought from the airport to fan my face, but the action made no difference. I sighed and began walking down the street, keeping to the shade as often as possible.
I still remembered the city. It had been almost eight years since I'd lived here, but I still remembered it like I'd never left. Back when I first moved to LA, I'd wake up some mornings wondering why I'd chosen to move to a brand new city rather than back here. But as I watched the people rush around me, I knew I could never live like this again.
I felt a shoulder bump against mine, and I turned towards the man, stopping suddenly as he turned to me and smiled. I knew that smile. I knew those eyes. I looked away for a moment, not quite believing my luck (or was it bad luck?), before looking back and returning his smile.
"Addison." It was simple, but perfect. I felt my heart begin to beat a little faster, like it always used to when he said my name.
"Hey, Derek," I replied, nervously brushing a strand of hair out of my eyes. Neither of us said anything for a few moments. After all, it had been six years since we'd seen each other, and our past was anything but easy.
"I, um, had a consult. At the hospital," he muttered, looking down at the floor.
"I'm visiting Savvy and Weiss," I said, unsure why I felt I had to give my reason. Quid pro quo, I guess. Something like that.
"It's been a long time." He looked back up at me. I nodded.
"Yeah." I couldn't understand why this was so awkward. We'd left on good terms, hadn't we?
"Meredith and I split up." Derek looked away again. "She said it could never work. That it had been good while it had lasted, but wasn't meant to be."
"You don't have to tell me this." Derek shrugged.
"You always hated New York summers," he said.
I laughed. "I know. Guess I didn't exactly pick the best time to visit, huh?"
"Are you busy?" I stopped laughing, Derek's comment surprising me slightly. I shook my head. "Feel like grabbing a drink? A cold one, of course."
"Okay."
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Ten minutes later, we were seated in a booth in a nearby café, two large glasses of iced tea (which, to be honest, had more ice than anything) sat between us. Our conversation was still strained, like we were avoiding something.
"How's LA?" Derek asked, taking a sip of his drink.
"It's nice. Warm. Not like this, though. I like it there."
"Are you seeing anybody?"
"Not any more. It was just...." I paused. "How's Seattle?"
He shrugged. "Fine." Short, but I knew better than to push him.
We sat in silence, watching the people walk past outside. I felt my gaze drift to Derek occasionally. His eyes were as blue as I remembered, and his black hair was still curly. I let my eyes run down over his shoulders and down to his hand, which lay casually on the table. Looking back at his eyes, I gasped slightly as I realized he was watching me, a smirk playing on his lips.
"Sorry," I muttered, and looked back to the street outside.
I don't know how long we sat like that. We hardly spoke, preferring instead to watch the people outside. After finishing my third refill, I glanced at my watch, realizing Savvy would be wondering where I'd got to.
"I should go too," Derek said. Glancing up, I noticed him watching me closely. I nodded mutely. "I'll pay."
"No, it's okay, I'll-"
"Just let me pay." His voice was firm, and I nodded. I stood up and picked up my bag as he walked to the counter and paid.
"You ready?" he asked as he returned. I nodded again, and we started walking to the door. I felt his hand come to rest on the small of my back, and although I knew it was wrong, it felt somehow right. As we walked out onto the street, he moved his hand away, and it surprised me how much I missed his touch.
"So, this was nice," he said. When I didn't reply, he laughed. "Okay, it was awkward."
I laughed with him. "That would be a better description."
I was aware of how close he was standing. I could feel his breath on my cheek, and our hands were so near that I wasn't shocked when they bumped against each other. We'd both stopped laughing now, and I felt the breath hitch in my throat as he linked his fingers through mine. His hands were warm (not surprising in this weather) and soft, like they always had been. I looked into his eyes, and, answering the question I hoped he was asking, I nodded ever-so slightly.
When his lips met mine, I felt something shoot through my body. My heart was beating faster now, faster than it had in a long time (something in my mind screamed "since the last time this happened", but I ignored it, because I didn't want to think about anything except how damn good the kiss felt). My arms snaked around his neck and pulled him closer.
Pulling away, he sighed. "I hate that breathing is so essential."
I smiled. "Me too." I rested my forehead against his. "Now I think saying this was nice is a little more justified."
"Definitely." He pressed a kiss to my cheek and took a step backwards, letting go of my hand.
"Come with me to see Savvy and Weiss," I said, desperate that he didn't walk away now.
"I don't-"
"Derek, listen to me. I know this is crazy. We haven't seen each other in six years. But that.... I just don't want it to be nothing when it felt like so much more." I watched him, willing him to say something. Anything.
"It's been too long," he said quietly, but I could hear the doubt in his voice.
"You don't believe that."
"No, I don't." Derek sighed and ran a hand through his hair. I closed my eyes, remembering how much I loved when he did that. "Meredith didn't end it. I did."
"Derek...."
"I told her I needed time. I did need time, to get over you. You left for LA and I knew I'd lost any chance of ever getting you back, Addie. And I hated that. But I thought if I just gave myself time that I'd forget how much you mean to me. I know it went badly, I know we both messed up, but we didn't fight. We could have fought and got us back."
"We didn't think it was worth it."
He stepped forwards quickly and wrapped his arms around me, and I suddenly didn't care how hot it was, because when he held me like that nothing else in the world mattered.
"We were always worth it," he whispered, and I nodded.
Derek pulled back and placed a kiss on my forehead. His lips lingered there for a moment. "I still love you, Addison."
I couldn't help but smile. "I love you too." I kissed his lips, trying to figure out how I'd lasted so many years without this, and knowing I'd never give this up willingly again.
"So you'll come?" I said as I pulled back.
Derek laughed and nodded. "If you insist."
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That really wasn't meant to be that long. I just kept typing, and, well, this is what came out. "Quid pro quo" means "something for something", by the way. It sounded like a good title. I also think it works for reviews (I give you Addek, you give me a review, yes?).