Syl dreamed. Almost every time she went to sleep, she dreamed. And always, always, she dreamed about Krit. Not the thin, tired looking twelve year old she had parted with in Memphis four years ago, but an older Krit. A more mature Krit, who was able to take care of himself.
Syl knew she was bad at taking care of herself. She knew that without Zack, she would have been captured many years ago. But she had always counted on having a partner, on having someone watch her back. Even when the Colonel had taught them to work on their own, she had thought that there was someone there, someone to help her through everything.
It wasn't that she couldn't handle the fighting. She was one of the best fighters in the team, and efficient at any number of other things. But taking care of herself? Always looking over her shoulder and keeping a close check on everything she did? It somehow wasn't in her nature. She worked her very best with a partner, especially when that partner was Krit.
And so she dreamed of him. Her partner, her friend, her other half. The dreams were never the same; sometimes they talked, sometimes she was forced to watch as he went through his days, sometimes she simply sat near him, saying nothing. But whatever happened, he was there, in her dreams, as he couldn't be in her life.
Zack had been the one to make them split up. After they had escaped, she and Krit had stayed together, trying to find a place to hide. They thought they had found it in a dilapidated part of Memphis after the Pulse had hit. But after only a year of living there, Manticore had found them. They wouldn't have gotten away if it hadn't been for Zack turning up at an opportune moment. And once they had lost the soldiers looking for them, Zack had made them split up. It was only safe to be on your own, he said. Safety in numbers was not a thing that X5s could ever trust in. Safety came at the price of always being alone.
And so they had split up. Syl knew Krit had been heading toward Miami initially, but when she had gone looking for him there, he was gone. It was the same thing every time; Syl finding some tiny piece of information that could lead her to him, but by the time she got there, he was gone. Always gone.
Syl had travelled over almost all of the country in the last four years. She had lived in more cities than she cared to remember. But she never stayed long. It was another of the curses laid on her; she could not be happy living in the same place for long. Zack always said it was better that way. That if she kept moving, Manticore would have a harder time finding here. But it also stopped anyone else for finding her.
Zack had told her that there were a few others out there, still alive. Max, for sure. Jondy and Zane and Brin as well. The others, she wasn't so sure of. Zack didn't want any of them knowing too much, in case they were caught and forced to reveal all they knew. And so she had to make do with the tiny bits of information Zack would slip her, or that she found out herself. He would never tell her where anyone else was, for that would be against his rule of safety alone, but he had mentioned, briefly, some names.
And so Syl searched. Mostly for Krit; he was her partner, after all. But also for the others that were out there somewhere. As long as she was alive and free of Manticore, she would continue to search for the others. For company.
Safety came at the price of being alone. But Syl was tired of being alone.