WORDS (Eventual Yatori)

CHAPTER 1 – FAITH

[A/N: I'm going to make this quick, but just to clarify there may be some manga spoilers in this! (at least up to Chapter 60 I believe) so if you haven't read up to there, please proceed with caution. Anyway, enjoy the chapter!]

| YATO P.O.V |

Time.

I didn't know how much time I had when I was younger. It was never something I really brought up in a discussion. After all, my father was far too focused on 'other things' than what my opinions were. I never got the chance to ask him how much time I would have in this life of mine. It's not as if he would've known the answer, but I can imagine what answer I would've gotten. Something along the lines of 'you can always reincarnate' or 'we have all the time in the world'. Something motivational, something to drive me away from any doubt.

I guess that's why I've always been so afraid to share what I think. It's because him ingraining it into my mind that my opinion was worthless for so long just so happened to shape the way I was. I've always been easily influenced, just like he's always treated me like a child.

Either way, I hated having all the time in the world. Some humans seem to think that being immortal is the answer to everything. They claim that everyone would have all of the time in the world to do whatever they wanted. But I don't see it that way, and I've never seen it that way. If you ask me why, I'll tell you that it's simply too much. There's too much time to watch the people you care about die around you. There's too much time to realise how hopeless you've been, and to realise how many mistakes you've repeated over and over again. I know there's too much time, because I've had too much time.

I used to just laugh at it. I used to just brush it off as if it was something distant, something that I'd forgotten and something that wasn't a part of me anymore. I didn't want my personality to reflect the way I was back then, despite having little to no control over it. But deep down I still knew that every passing day, every tick of the clock in those times have counted towards who I am today.

I may not have known how much time I had when I was younger, but there is something I do know now, and that is that my time is one of the most valuable things I know of.

And yes, looking back at it now if I were to have found someone saying something like this to me, and giving me that type of advice, I would've probably just remained ignorant and laughed at the peculiarity of it.

But my whole life changed as soon as I met the girl known as Hiyori Iki. That one girl who constantly tried to define herself as someone who was just an average school girl with no importance or power. That one girl who every enemy I ever came across claimed was powerless, turned out to be the most powerful one.

And when I lay there watching the world slowly fade to white around me, I looked at her by my side longing to have the chance to see her happy again. I wanted one final chance to feel the slightest bit at home. But instead, the last thing I saw on that day was her mouthing one word. One word at the beginning of a sentence. It's a shame I didn't think that I would ever have enough time to find out the rest of that sentence.

I think that was the first time I'd ever wanted to have more time. And now I'm beginning to think it may have been my last.

| ABOUT A WEEK EARLIER, HIYORI'S P.O.V |

"Politics!", Ami stated in pride as she gave off a gleaming smile. I looked at her, initially in confusion.

"Politics? I thought you were going to study maths…", I asked back in response. We hadn't had a chance to talk in a while, because she'd gone off to do some studying abroad and ever since she came back I was doing an awful lot of what I liked to call 'studying' (what was really trying to help Yato lead some sort of organised life).

"Well, let's just say I changed my mind.", she said back before munching on her salad. It was lunchtime at school, and for some reason Ami thought that the best time to catch up with me was at the time I planned to get Yukine's homework together. So at the point in time I was trying to enjoy the conversation despite shaking my leg in impatience. It's not as if I wasn't interested in what she had to say, I was just desperate to get the work set out before the end of school.

"I don't know.. My parents claim that Maths would be way too stressful with my grades, so they told me to take the next best thing. Politics isn't so bad either. Not as general of a subject, but still not so bad.", Ami stated carelessly.

"I see.", I said back before taking a quick glance at the clock. Ten more minutes till the end of the lunch hour and I still hadn't gotten anything done..

"Well, I guess I'm quite unlike you, aren't I? You've always seemed to be so certain about doing medicine so frankly I'm not surprised you chose it. Me, being all indecisive must make you feel weird.", she said back.

"What?", Initially I didn't really process what she said because I was far too focused on panicking about the time. But after reading it through my mind again I quickly remembered.

I then hesitated. Not because I wasn't sure about medicine, but because of what else she said about me being 'certain'. I almost laughed at myself in my mind when remembering the day I'd applied to take medicine, but at the same time I felt a spike of unwanted grief when thinking about it.

"Hiyori, you are sure about taking the medical branch right?", Ami responded.

I quickly shot up realising that I had been looking downward to my desk the entire time when I was thinking. "Yes, of course! Sorry, I just got distracted for a moment there.".

It didn't take me long to notice that I had once again resorted to looking down at my desk in fear of the way she'd take what I said.

"Hiyori, are you doing okay? You seem a little weird today..", she asked back as I became more awkward.

"Of course! I've just gotten a bit of a stomach ache. Guess I ate my lunch a little too quickly.", I chuckled before slowly reaching down to my bag. "Anyway, I really better go. I've got a lesson soon."

Ami smiled to me, in her friendly supportive way. "Of course. Hope you feel better soon."

I got up and smiled in return. "Thanks, Ami.".

'I'm such an Idiot.'

I've always been able to rely on Ami, especially when I've felt down about something. Even despite not knowing what half of my life's problems were about, she's always been so supportive of what I do. I sometimes wonder whether it's actually humanely possible to be that kind.

But, when I walked out of the classroom, I didn't feel as positive and uplifted as I usually would after talking to a friend like her. Something about that conversation made me feel empty. It wasn't her fault of course. She didn't mean to make me feel that way, and that's why I thought it was best not to mention anything. Still, a part of myself always wished that I could tell my friends more about my life.

Sure, they may have thought I was insane. But I guess that life would've always been insane when I was spending time with gods and people who were technically dead.

The rest of my school day wasn't very interesting. All of the lessons seemed just as mundane as they did the day before. It didn't surprise me though. School just became less and less interesting as the years rolled by.

I couldn't help but finding myself thinking about my conversation with Ami a lot of the time. I knew the reason why I thought negatively about it, but I don't think I wanted to admit it to myself.

I am certain on studying medicine, aren't I?

I kept asking myself questions in my head. Things I somewhere, deep down knew the answer too, but at the same time was too afraid to here myself say.

I found myself walking out of the school quicker than usual, as if I had to see Yato and Yukine. The truth is, I didn't really have to see them quickly. I just wanted to see them, so that I could avoid thinking about everything earlier.

Turns out I later regretted making my way over to Kofuku's. Not only did seeing Yato make me feel more and more guilty about what had happened earlier that year, but there seemed to be other.. situations.

"Hey guys!", I said whilst sliding open the shōji [a/n: the proper name of the translucent sliding door-like things in traditional Japanese houses, thought it was a bit more fitting than saying 'sliding doors' because they aren't really modernish doors. ]

"Oh, Hiyori..", Yukine said in response. It didn't take me long to notice that something was up, just from the look on his face.

"Is everything okay?"

"Well, not exactly. Daikoku's ran into a bit of a situation.", he said back.

I walked over to the next room where I heard Kofuku's voice, along with Yukine who seemed to be following me in there. I quickly identified the worried expression Kofuku seemed to have, along with Daikoku. Yato was also standing behind them, but seemingly looking in another direction away from their eye-contact.

"Is everything okay?", I asked.

"Oh, Hiyori.. Sorry, I didn't expect you to come here this early.", Kofuku said in a soft tone. I rarely saw Kofuku like that. She was almost always the type of person who would laugh and joke around all of the time when speaking to you.

"You don't have to be sorry, is everything okay?"

"Well you see.. something strange has happened and we're not sure what to think.", she said shyly.

The room fell silent for a moment. It was at that moment when I managed to capture the look on Yato's face, and unlike everyone else's it seemed weird. Sure, it would be weird seeing him freaked out like Kofuku and Daikoku anyway, but it was almost as if he was more suspicious than puzzled. I didn't like that look. Something about the way he no longer seemed assured made me feel unhappy.

"Just say it..", Daikoku responded. I gave the two of them a look, trying to make it obvious that I wanted to know what was going on. Kofuku fumbled before saying the answer.

"Daikoku's human."

What?

I genuinely became worried and confused at that point along with them. I knew that I didn't know everything about the way that the far shore worked, but this made absolutely no sense from what I'd known. Yato hadn't told me about it anyway, but it was already obvious that he didn't mention it for a reason. It simply wasn't possible, was it?

"But, how can that happen?", Hiyori said back, "How could Daikoku become human if he was already..".

I meant to finish the sentence of with 'dead' but frankly it seemed a bit insensitive even at this point. And now that he was human, I was beginning to wonder whether he really counted as being dead in the first place.

"We don't know. There's obviously some explanation, but we can't seem to find one just yet.", she said back.

"It's just creepy..", Yukine said quietly as I turned to face him. Once again the room filled with silence as I begun to gather my thoughts.

I wasn't too sure what to think really. Whilst it was obviously good to be alive, the fact that this happened out of the blue with no correlation to the rules of the near shore just made the situation nerve-wracking. If this type of thing were to happen to more regalia, what would happen to the gods?

And what consequences would be there for them once they become human? I mean, getting an identity and stable life is enough struggle. What about their old lives? What if they remember who they were?

"Sorry about this Hiyori. It must be quite a shock to hear," Kofuku said out of the blue, breaking the eerie silence. "Anyway, you wouldn't be interested in some tea would you?"

"Oh, no that's fine, thank you.", I said back.

"No, please. Let me make you some anyway.", she said whilst quickly walking out of the room. Daikoku quickly followed her, obviously worried for her.

"I think I need to go and do some training with Kazuma, so I'll be back in a bit.", Yukine said, also attempting to put on a fake smile before leaving the room. It was pitifully obvious he wasn't settled with this either and I didn't like the fact that he didn't at least say something.

I turned to Yato. "Well?"

He continued to remain silent whilst avoiding looking at me.

"Aren't you going to say something?", I said, somehow expecting an answer.

"What is there to say?", he asked. He also spoke in a way which wasn't natural for him, at least from what I'd seen. I was used to seeing him happy and overly-excited all of the time. He was almost never serious like this.

"You're the one who usually has the answers. So tell me, is there an explanation for this?", I said also finding myself unsettlingly stern.

"Like Kofuku said, there isn't an explanation. This can't happen.", he turned towards the door leading outside, "It can't."

He slid it closed, leaving me alone.

Idiot. He can't just leave like that!

Not long afterwards, I went to go and see how Kofuku was doing. When I walked in, I did in fact find her pouring tea, but it wasn't in her usual spritely manner. She was upset, very upset.

"Oh, Hiyori. Here, I made you some.", she said before handing me a cup.

"Kofuku, are you sure you're doing okay? You look a bit pale?". I was being honest, she did almost look physically ill.

"Oh, I think I just forgot to eat a little today. Gods do that sometimes. We don't really need too much after all, it's just not great to go off it.", she replied.

I knew she was lying. I knew from the continuous silence that found itself building up within the last few minutes.

"Please Kofuku, I know you're upset. Stop trying to hide it."

She put the teapot down. "What are you talking about?". Her hands begun to shake as they touched the countertop.

"I know you don't know what to do now that you don't have a shinki around. I don't blame you for being concerned. I just wish you would be honest and at least chosen to talk to me!"

"It's not that.". She spoke in a harsher tone. Still facing the wall, she took a deep breath before continuing to speak to me.

"I'm not upset that I don't have a shinki anymore, It's just that..".

She shuddered and her breath became shaky as I watched her look over to me. Each undereye had become tainted with a dark, undesirable look and it stood out vividly against her pale complexion.

"I don't know what to do. It's great that he's human and it's great that he gets another chance to live life – but what about ours? Sure, he may have been dead already but my life with Daikoku still felt real. It felt so genuine. And now that he's human, what does that mean? What will I do when I watch him grow older without me, leading a new life? What if he gets his own family and completely disregards what we had?

What if he forgets about me?"

It was that last sentence that struck me the most. Not only did I feel so awful for her at the time, but it begun to make me think of things. Things which I didn't want to think about, like the fate I had with Yato and Yukine. The times I'd thought that I'd never see either of them again, and the time where I'd almost forgotten about them completely.

I had no idea what to say to Kofuku then. How was I supposed to respond to a question I didn't know the answer to? I could've given her advice, but at the time I couldn't muster up any useful advice at all.

"I'm sorry, I guess I'm just being selfish aren't I?", Kofuku stated. It was at that point where I knew I had to say something.

"Listen to me. I may not know much, but I can tell you one thing. Daikoku is never going to forget you, no matter what happens. He's not going to forget the person who he stood by all of those years. Trust me."

She looked at me in surprise, almost as if I had said something which made the ground shake.

"He cares about you. He'll always care about you."

The distant sound of crickets soon became louder and louder as she pulled a smile. And this time it wasn't the smile which was made to deceive.

"Thank you, Hiyori. I really needed that."

I closed my mouth, which I found to be slightly gaped open as I breathed through it. I wanted to accept her apology, but at the same time I was still unsure whether I meant what I said.

After all, it's not as if I knew what I was saying.

Not long after that, I went to go and find Yato, who I'd hoped hadn't exactly gone far. The sound of the crickets became louder, accompanying the sound of my heels clashing with the ground.

"Yato!"

The street was empty, as usual, and the sky was covered with a chilled blanket of clouds. I began walking quicker, looking around for any sign of him.

A few seconds later, I saw a light in the distance. Running towards it, I noticed that a small crowd of fireflies had gathered. And the closer I came, the more I noticed Yato standing a few metres behind it.

I walked towards him and he looked towards me, his blue eyes lighting up almost just like the fireflies.

"You idiot.. why walk away like that?"

He sighed. "I don't know.."

I quickly became annoyed, realising that despite Yato being more stern on this occasion, he could still be just as irritating.

"It's okay. Kofuku and Daikoku are going to be fine."

"How would you know?"

I once again became unsure of myself and begun thinking about what to say. But despite not being able to find the intricate details, I knew one reason. One simplistic, unexplainable thing that I always knew I had with me.

"Because I have faith that it will."

He looked at me with fascination, as if I'd just said something that had more meaning behind it than I intended, which admittedly made me blush in embarrassment because I didn't see why it would.

"Well then," he said back, beginning to sound natural again. "you better not be wrong about this, because I think I'll just have to believe you."

[A/N: Hope you enjoyed this (pretty long) chapter! Will be updating very soon :D]