A/N: Ok, once again, I got this idea from my sister, because she's just chock-full of them. xD We kinda got it from watching the spin the bottle episode from "Everybody Hates Chris". (luv that show xD) Anywhoozle, and I really wanted to write about Konohamaru, because he's just such a little cutie! I loved experimenting with him. ^^ And I also included my sis, Caraqueen's OC, Myumi. (TenTen's little sister. Be nice- she's awesome.) Now, your cue, Honorable Grandson! xD
Konohamaru: -_- Beth doesn't own Naruto. She's too stupid.
Dx...Good as it's gonna get, I guess.
Passing notes during school, especially a ninja academy, was a skill worthy of graduating. It required a natural devious talent, a sharp eye, quick thinking and reflexes. Skills Konohamaru, Udon, and Moegi had perfected.
Konohamaru looked up quickly to see if Iruka was glancing his way, then slyly slipped a note to his right. "Pass it on," he whispered to Moegi, pasting an innocent smile and sitting up straighter as Iruka turned.
Moegi lowered the folded piece of notebook paper below her desk so it wouldn't look conspicuous, then quietly unraveled it and read the words silently to herself. She beamed and gave a slight nod Konohamaru's way before folding it back and passing it to Udon, who was sitting to her right.
Udon gave a loud sniffle, reading the note as he tucked it into his notebook, so it merely looked like he was going over some math problems. "Pass it on," Moegi and Konohamaru mouthed. Udon nodded, pushing his glasses back up his nose, then turned and quickly handed the note to the desk behind him before spinning back aroundf and placing his hands on the desk like a good, poised little boy.
"Are you sure we should be doing this, Konohamaru?" Moegi whispered as Iruka's back was turned. Her flushed cheeks indicated that she wasn't just talking about note-passing. More like what was in the note.
"You kidding?" Konohamaru whispered back, grinning. "This is gonna be great! It's the next new thing, Moegi, you'll see!"
Moegi frowned, giving her signature "if you say so" look.
"Is there something you'd like to share with the class, Konohamaru?" Iruka demanded, one eyebrow raised.
All eyes were on him in a matter of seconds. Konohamaru forced an innocent smile and hoped it didn't come out as a smirk. "No, Iruka-Sensei."
Yes, but he already had.
"The note said six o'clock sharp!" Konohamaru wailed. "Where is everyone?"
"Maybe their parents wouldn't let 'em come," Moegi suggested kindly.
They were behind a hole in the fence in the tall-grass alleyway of the village, which Konohamaru had deemed his secret hideout. Candy, popcorn, and an empty liter of soda was set up. The trio was ready for the increasingly popular game of "Spin the Bottle", followed by an epic round of Truth or Dare.
Udon crawled through the opening, his voice nasally as usual. "Only one person came," he sniffed, rubbing his nose and stepping aside so the visitor could follow suit.
She crawled through then stood and flipped her long, brown hair over her shoulder as her lilac-gray eyes flickered. "Are we the only ones here?"
"Hanabi?" Moegi's mouth dropped open. "You came?"
"Of course! Why wouldn't I?"
"'Cause you're a snob," Konohamaru muttered, then let out a howl of indignation and pain when Moegi sharply elbowed him. Then he sighed heavily. "Only one person comes to my awesome party? And it's a girl? Just great!"
"What's wrong with girls?" Hanabi narrowed her eyes.
"Yeah, we could so kick your butt!" Moegi chimed in.
"Nuh-uh! I'm the Honorable Grandson, remember?" Konohamaru rolled his eyes like that explained everything.
Hanabi and Moegi crossed their arms and exchanged an exasperated "boys" look. Then Moegi pulled a face at Konohamaru, sticking out her tongue. Hanabi, who was too polite to follow suit, just smiled and giggled in amusement.
"Can we start now?" Udon rubbed his nose.
"Hey! As leader of this club and game, I will hereby bring this meeting to order!" Konohamaru's eyes glinted proudly.
"But it's not a meeting," Udon interjected matter-of-factly. "It's Spin the Bottle and Truth or Dare."
"Hey! Who's the leader here? I thought we just went over this! I can call this shindig whatever I want!"
Moegi and Hanabi sat down and ate popcorn with simultaneous sighs, looking between the boys.
Moegi rolled her eyes knowingly. "This is gonna take a while."
Konohamaru was the first to spin the empty soda bottle, which didn't work well on grass. "I dunno why we're doing this stupid game in the first place. I didn't know you were s'posed to kiss a girl! I thought we just spun bottles! Now I'm gonna get girl cooties!" he complained.
"Quit whining." Moegi leaned forward on her elbows.
Suddenly a rustle in the bushes outside the fence caught their attention. They turned to see a girl their age crawl through the hole then straighten proudly. The setting sun revealed long, straight brown hair and eyes to match. She beamed and plopped down beside him, reaching for some popcorn. "What'd I miss?"
"Another girl," Konohamaru grumbled. "That means more cooties."
"What's that apposed to mean?" the girl shrieked, clearly offended. "It's boys who have the cooties, stupid! Duh! Not girls! Jeez, everyone knows that."
"Hi, Myumi," Hanabi smiled at Tenten's little sister.
"Hi! How's about we skip the kissing and go straight to the pranks?" Myumi grinned wickedly, a mischievous gleam in her eyes.
"Sounds good to me!" Konohamaru jumped up eagerly. Udon nodded in agreement.
Moegi looked disappointed but didn't argue as she and Hanabi stood.
Myumi continued. "'Cause I've got some GREAT ideas! Wait'll you hear 'em!"
They knew where to find Naruto- Ichiraku's. That was step one of the Ultimate Awesomest Prank of Disaster and Funness- so named by Myumi and Konohamaru.
Just as Naruto was about to dig into some ramen, Konohamaru peeked around the curtain with a toothy grin. "Hi, boss!"
Naruto turned around and grinned back. "Hey, Konohamaru! How's the Sexy Jutsu coming along?"
While Konohamaru distracted Naruto, Myumi filled Naruto's ramen and his drink with extremely "hot Mama" Tobasco sauce, while Udon and Moegi stuck itching powder down Naruto's pants. Unfortunately, he noticed that one. But when he turned his head, the little desperados had disappeared out of sight. "Hm..that's funny. I could've sworn.." he murmured to himself.
"What's funny, boss?" Konohamaru piped up. "Ah, never mind. Speaking of funny, you'd better eat that ramen! Well, bye!" He dashed back behind the curtain.
"Wait! What does funny hafta do with my ra-" Naruto's voice trailed off when he realized his buddy was gone. Shrugging, and absentmindedly scratching his itchier-than-usual butt, Naruto forked a walloping amount of ramen down.
Little did he know that five little heads, all on top of another, were watching him intently from the side of the curtain anticipatingly.
Naruto screamed and dropped his chopsticks, jumping up so suddenly the ramen spilled. His face turned more and more beet red by the second. "I didn't order spicy ramen! Just miso!" he wailed in agony. He reached for his drink in one desperate snatch and downed it, not realizing it was even hotter than the ramen until it was down his gullet and his mouth burned like a wildfire. "AAAAHHHHH!" he screamed, frantically clawing his throat as tears filled his bulging eyes. "MAKE IT STOPPP!" Then he desperately started scratching his butt for dear life, even rubbing it against a stool, to no avail. He caught every single onlookers' dumbfounded attention.
Konohamaru, Moegi, Udon, Hanabi, and Myumi were laughing so hard they fell to the ground in their mirth as Naruto screamed, scratched, and burned in agony.
"YOU'RE GONNA PAY FOR THIS, KONOHAMARU!" Naruto's bellow and following coughing fit was the last thing the kids heard before slipping away into the night.
They were all still trying to stop laughing when Myumi pointed at Moegi with a rambuctious grin. "You're next. You're gonna prank Sakura."
"What?" Moegi gasped. "No! Sakura's awesome! I can't do that!"
"Aw, c'mon, Moegi! Don't be a sissy!" Konohamaru urged. "This is fun! Besides, if I can do it to the boss, you can do it to the pink chick!"
Moegi glanced at him and sighed in defeat. "Fine. What do I hafta do?"
The rest of the gang stood at the window and watched as Moegi purchased flowers from Ino's shop and went to Sakura's house, knocking on the door politely.
Sakura opened the door with a smile. "Hi, Moegi! What's up?" She noticed the flowers and her smile got wider. "Are those for me? You're so sweet."
Moegi swallowed then smiled quickly. "They're from Sasuke. He told me to get you cherry blossoms, 'cause that's what your name means." She handed a starstruck Sakura the bouquet with a sweet smile. "He told me to tell you to meet him at Ichiraku's for somethin' really special." Moegi shrugged as if she wouldn't know what in the world that would be. Then she looked around as if to make sure nobody was near, then dropped her voice to a whisper, grinning widely. "But you might wanna wear something pretty."
Sakura squealed, emerald eyes dancing. "I knew it! I KNEW IT! In your face, INO-PIG! I knew he would return my feelings someday! I just knew! This is just a dream come true! Pinch me! C'mon." Sakura gleefully held out her arm, then yanked it back and gasped. "What am I doing just standing here? My beloved Sasuke is waiting for me!" Sakura hugged Moegi tightly. "Thank you, thank you!" Then she was gone.
(A/N: Btw, please keep in mind this is earlier in the series, where Sakura would've actually fallen for something like that. xDD)
Moegi tried to hide her guilt as she marched back to the others. "Ready for Phase 2?"
Konohamaru grinned, heading toward the barbecue place. "Already on it."
"Hiya, Choji!" Konohamaru greeted, slipping into the booth where Choji was practically inhaling ribs.
Choji eyed him warily. "I'm not sharing."
"Wouldn't think of it." Konohamaru leaned forward with a grin. "But if I were you, I'd be getting ready for my date."
That got his attention. "Date?" Choji smacked around a mouthful of meat.
Konohamaru faked surprise. "Well yeah. Don't you and Sakura have a date tonight?"
Choji looked even more surprised. "Sakura?" The name sounded foreign on his lips.
Konohamaru facepalmed. "Don't tell me you don't even know about your own date! Man, Choji. Sakura's crazy about you. You know what I heard?" Konohamaru's voice dropped dramatically. "I heard she digs your mad skills of being able to eat twenty pounds of meat at a time!"
Choji's mouth was stained with barbeque sauce. "Yeah, well, why wouldn't she?" he scoffed, rubbing his napkin. "It is pretty impressive, if I do say so myself."
"Yeah! You're the man, Choji! Just woo her with your meat-loving charm. I heard she wants to meet you at Ichiraku's. Now go get 'em, tiger!" Konohamaru flashed him a thumbs-up.
Choji was off, waddling out of the restaurant with a huge grin. "I've hit the jackpot! I knew I was a catch! Pretty girl, here I come!" he said to himself proudly before coming back and taking his ribs with him.
Konohamaru joined his laughing friends, then Myumi nodded at Udon, signaling it was his cue. Udon raced off to where Sasuke was, wide-eyed and breathing heavily. "Sasuke...come..quick..!" The rest of the group watched from a distance.
Sasuke straightened and nodded down at Udon. "What's wrong?"
"It's Kakashi.. he's over by Ichiraku's. And he took his mask off! You won't believe this- but he has HUGE buck teeth!" Udon pretended to speak between excited, labored breaths.
Sasuke's eyes widened as he stiffened. You didn't have to tell him twice. He took off in a cloud of dust toward Ichiraku's. Udon stared after him in admiration. "I wanna be just like Sasuke when I grow up."
"Yeah, yeah, that's great and all," Myumi said as they approached. "But now it's me and Hanabi's turn."
Myumi ran back to her house as fast as her legs could carry her and burst frantically through the door. "TenTen! TenTen!"
Tenten came out of her room, rubbing her eyes. "Well, Myumi, there you a-" She stopped and frowned, concerned. "What's wrong?"
"Neji's in trouble! Big trouble!" Myumi panted.
TenTen's eyes widened then narrowed. "What kind of trouble?"
"Cloud ninjas.." Myumi gasped. "They got him. I don't have time to tell you ever'thing...but it was all BLAM! And KA-POW! And WHAAA! Everybody was kung-fu fightinggg!"
"Just cut to the chase already!"
"Right. Anyways..but..but...Neji's dying. And he wants 'ta see you." Myumi added tears for effect. "Over by Ichiraku's. Hurry!"
TenTen's eyes shimmered as she hugged her sister then took off quicker than a cheetah...forgetting she was still in her nightgown.
Myumi smirked. It was all coming together perfectly.
"Cousin! Cousin!" Hanabi banged on the Hyuga's training room, where she knew she would find Neji. "Come quick!"
Sure enough, Neji opened the door a crack, breathing heavily and eyes hardened. "What do you want?"
"It's your teammate, TenTen." Hanabi faked wide, fear-filled eyes.
"What about her?" Neji demanded, slightly suspicious.
"Cloud ninja. I don't have time to explain, but they're holding her ransom over near Ichiraku's. The Leaf Jonin are already on it, but I thought you'd like to know."
Neji nodded curtly, activating his Byakugan and brushing past her, taking off through the halls. Hanabi waited until he was out of sight then motioned for Moegi to step out of the shadows around the corner. "Time for my elder sister."
"N..Naruto- he what?" Hinata stuttered, lavender eyes widening as her face flushed a deep crimson.
"You heard me good and well, sister. I overheard him say so myself." Hanabi brushed Hinata's violet-black hair. "He wants you to meet him at Ichiraku's." She smiled slyly. "I think he likes you."
Hinata's eyes shimmered and she looked mystified, ready to faint. "Naruto.."
"Yeah." Moegi took out a makeup kit. "And we're gonna do your makeup for you all nice and pretty. So you'll look good for your man!"
Moegi and Hanabi applied snow-white powder to her face, gaudy eyeshadow, blue blush, bright red nose and lips- you guessed it. A clown.
"Hurry, sister! Don't keep Naruto waiting!" Hanabi led Hinata outside, avoiding any mirrors.
Moegi grinned at her as they shared high-fives, Hinata running to meet her lover with a clown's face.
Myumi ran inside the flower shop, where Ino was behind the counter. "Oooh, Ino, you're not gonna believe this! Sakura's got some nerve!"
Ino glanced up curiously, bristling at the mention of her rival and ex-best friend. "What did Billboard Brow do this time?"
"She's dissing you outside by Ichiraku's. I mean, really dissing. She called you trashy and tons of other bad stuff- and get this. She's on a date with Choji. Your teammate. Probably trying to turn him against you, no doubt." Myumi rolled her eyes and shook her head, as if Sakura was incredibly immature.
Ino's blue eyes narrowed into slits. "Call me trashy, does she? Oh no she doesn't! I'll show her!" Ino's words were caked in venom. "Ooh, when I get my hands on her..." She stormed to the door. "Let's see how much guts she has after I rip 'em out of her!"
"Yeah! Show her who's boss!" Myumi cheered, patting Ino on the back and inconspicuously taping a "I'm a trashy blonde" note.
"Just watch me!"
You probably have a pretty good idea of the chaos at Ichiraku's that night.
"Neji! Neji! You're not dying!"
"TenTen..you're unharmed.. and in your nightgown."
"...I am..?"
"Sasuke! Oh, my darling Sasuke! I've come! And thanks so much for the flowers! Heehee...now where's the special gift, hmm? A kiss?"
"Sakura, what are you talking about? Where's Kakashi and his teeth?"
"Heya, hotstuff! No need to hide it anymore, you're into me. Where're we eating at for our date?"
"BILLBOARD BROW! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, HUH? YOU. ARE. DEAD! AND GET AWAY FROM CHOJI!"
"Ladies, ladies, no need to fight over me. There's enough of Choji to go around. ...Ino, is that a note taped to your back?"
"BILLBOARD BROW!"
"DON'T LOOK AT ME, INO-PIG! You're just jealous that I'm on a date with Sasuke and YOU'RE not!"
"What?"
"'I'm a trashy blonde.'"
"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, SAKURA!"
"N-Naruto...you..you called..?"
"AAAHH! ITCHING AND BURNINGGG! STUPID KONOHAMARU!...Hinata..why are you a clown?"
"W..What?"
"So..no Cloud ninja?"
"No Cloud ninja."
"Oh. ..I feel pretty stupid right now."
"Agreed. Nice nightgown."
"NEJI!"
"GET YOUR DIRTY HANDS OFF ME, INO-PIG! SASUKE DARLING, INO'S SMASHING MY FACE!"
"I could care less, Sakura. Where's Kakashi?"
"YOU'RE WONDERING WHERE THE HECK KAKASHI IS AND NOT EVEN CARE ABOUT YOUR GIRLFRIEND GETTING KILLED OVER HERE?"
"Girlfriend?"
"See. He likes me, Billboard Brow!"
"I like both of you, ladies. But food comes first."
"NOT YOU, CHOJI! And could your crunching be a little louder?"
"Potato chips crunch. It's their thing."
"I NEED WATER AND BABY POWDER OVER HERE! OWWWW!"
"...H-He..called me a clown.."
"So.. if it wasn't really you.. then.."
"Myumi."
"Hanabi."
"Udon."
"Moegi."
"KONOHAMARU!"
"See? I told you it would be fun!" Myumi beamed.
The others gave her dirty looks. "You're kicked out of the club," Konohamaru muttered.
"Hurry, they're catching up!" Moegi gasped.
Konohamaru, Hanabi, Myumi, Moegi, and Udon ran as fast as they could away from the angry mob chasing them.
Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, Ino, Choji, Neji, TenTen, and Hinata were gaining ground- fast.
That was about as much fun as they could stand for one night. And they wouldn't be having any more of it for a long, long time.
They should've stuck with Spin the Bottle. Cooties were better than this.
A/N: HAHA! XD I had soo much fun writing this! Reminded me of my childhood days...anywhoozle, please review and tell me what you thought! Thankies!
