The Worst YYH Fanfic Ever – One Shot

Disclaimer: I own nothing, not even the shitty Mary-Sues.

I am sick of tired trying to find a decent YYH fic when 95 percent of it is Mary-Sueage or HieixKuramaxYusakexKoenmaxOCxOCCxMC HammerxFlava Flav…err…you got the idea.

So, I decided to make this one-shot tribute to all those crap-ass…I mean…wonderful fics out there.

Also, I need a small break from my other story.

Yours truly,

Tanya Adams 64

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It was a normal Monday afternoon and Yusake was leaning against the wall at the roof of his school.

"Whew, that Keiko is really starting to annoy me. All I want to do is take a nap, but all she do is nag and pressuring me to do my school work." He said to himself, when all of the sudden a bright light flashed, nearly blinding him. All of the sudden, he found what appears to be a woman standing front of him.

"Okay…that was weird. Who are you?" he asked. She giggled.

"Yusake, how can you not know me? I'm your girlfriend, Usagi Samara Selena Rosetta Opal Diamond Rose Smith." She smiled at him.

"Wait…what? What's with the long-ass name and why the hell you say that you're my girlfriend? I don't even know you?" Yusake stepped back, trying to distance himself from this strange woman.

"But Yusake, we're both Spirit detectives. I have been a detective longer, since I am six thousand years old, thanks for my father being the devil and my mother being the moon goddess. They both died when I was born, so I was forced to fend myself, when one day Koenma saw me and said I had great potential being a spirit detective. So, I took the job and been one ever since." She gave another annoying giggle. Yusake gave her a sour look.

"What the hell are you talking about? I didn't ask for your life story!" Yusake turned around and starts to leave.

"Yusake, where are you going, my love!" the strange girl asked.

"To class…I have work to do!" Yusake lied and left.

In class

Yusake entered in the classroom and plopped down in his seat. Keiko was surprised to see him in class while in session.

"Yusake?" Keiko gave a confused glance. Yusake looked at her with disgust in his face. He didn't want to be here, but he sure in hell does not want to deal with that weird ass girl.

"Hey, Kieko. That new chick, Usagi is really weird. She came up and started stalking me, saying that she is a spirit detective and said she was my girlfriend. You need to send her back to the loony bin." Yusake whispered to her. Keiko raised an eyebrow and scratched her head.

"New girl? I don't remember seeing a new girl by that name? Are you sure you're not sick or anything?" Keiko asked. Yusake groaned.

"Never mind!" Yusake placed his head down and took a nap.

Later that night

Botan waited for the group at the sea dock, after receiving reports of demons running amok around the city limits. Moments later, Yusake and Kuwabara arrived, followed by Kurama. Botan glanced at Kurama with a confused look on her face.

"Where is Hiei?" she asked.

"I am not sure, I don't keep track of him." Kurama answered.

"Heh, the little runt probably slept in." Kuwabara joked.

"I'm here." Hiei surprised them with an un-amused monotone voice as he appeared behind of Kuwabara, startling the taller human.

"DON'T DO THAT!" Kuwabara yelled, but Hiei didn't answered.

"Alright, everyone's here. Down to business, Koenma started receiving reports of demons appearing all over the city. Don't worry too much, they are just small weak ones and they will not cause too much problems." Botan was about to take out a file when all of the sudden, a bright, blinding light flashed, surprising the group. After that, the girl, Usagi, rushed up and cling on to Yusake's arm.

"Hey! Let go of me you psycho!" Yusake struggled himself free. Usagi gave him a sad look and glared at Botan.

"Umm, Yusake, who is she?" Botan asked. Usagi stepped up front of him and growled.

"I am Usagi (Insert-full-name) and I am his girlfriend, which that means you better back off you bitch if you value your life!" Usagi threaten Botan, who was dumbstruck.

"Hey, Yusake, I thought Keiko was your girlfriend?" Kuwabara asked.

"Keiko is a bitch as well! She better stay away from my Yusake!" Usagi growled louder to Kuwabara. "Eww…why are even here, Kazuma-kun! Your not cute, so go back home! Your totally useless!"

"SAY WHAT?" Kuwabara fumed with anger.

"Hold it! For crying out loud! I don't even know you!" Yusake tried to get her attention, but she squealed loudly as she saw Kurama and Hiei.

"LIKE! OMIGOSH! MY FAVORITE YAOI COUPLE! HOW ARE YOU?" She jumped up and down front of Kurama.

"I beg your pardon?" Kurama backed away from here.

"What's 'yaoi'?" Hiei asked.

"That means you two are totally in love!" Usagi clapped her hands and squealed once more.

"WHAT?" Kurama eyes widened.

"In love…with the fox? No thank you, I have no desire of even going through that pathetic human emotion." Hiei grunted.

"Don't be such a meanie!" Usagi stomped her foot when Yusake tapped her shoulder and turned around and with all of Yusake's might, punched her square in the face.

"GET LOST YOU FREAK!" He yelled. She looked him and started to cry.

"Yusake…how could you hit me, a girl? I thought you loved me." She sniffed.

"Love you? I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU! Even if I did, I AM PRETTY SURE THAT I WILL NOT GET INVOLVED WITH A WEIRD ASS PERSON WHO INSULTS MY FRIENDS!" Yusake spat on her face.

"But Yusake…" she got up and looked at the sky. All of the sudden, a beam of light appeared above her and she started to fade away.

"Since my only love doesn't love anymore, I have no purpose. Good-bye everyone…" she said and disappeared completely. A minute later, everyone looked at each other.

"Well, that was anti-climatic." Botan remarked.

"Yeah, Urameshi. Why didn't you kill her with that spirit gun?" Kuwabara asked.

"I have no clue…oh well, good riddance. Now that freak is gone, let's go get those demons! I am ready to kick some ass!" Yusake cheered and started ran off ahead of the rest of the group.

"That's the sprit, Yusake!" Botan smiled and followed him.

"Hey way for me!" Kuwabara yelled after them. Kurama chuckled and followed after them. Hiei, who was possibly the most confused of the group, just stood there.

"Can someone tell me what 'yaoi' is?"

The End

Yes, I know. Pretty lame, but I am pretty sure there are much, MUCH worse ones out there...

Anyways, I hope you enjoy this one-shot and leave a review. Thank you.