Zero stood, soaked in blood. Knife in hand, he stabbed himself in the stomach, again.
Why? Why can't I stop myself?
That was the only thought running though is head. He couldn't stop. It was as if someone was trying to force him from his sanity, force him to give in.
It was infuriating. Another being, another him, another mind, seeping into his own and taking over, and there was nothing he could to about it.
He remembered, from a time ago, when Harpuia had irritated him, and he had blacked out. When he woke up, Harpuia was half dead. That was the first episode, for lack of a better word, but the only one that had injured another. Now only he was being hurt.
Now he was only being hurt, both physically and mentally. He knew he would lose it soon. Lose it and hurt others. Lose it and become something else. Give in to the being internally attacking him. Give in to Omega.
He was fighting a fight that made no sense to others, no matter how well he explained it. It was himself he was fighting, himself he was losing to, himself he hated, and himself he would be killed by.
No matter how he tried, he would lose. No matter what he did, he would die. No matter what he wanted, he would be hurt.
Ciel walked down the hall, searching for Zero. She'd already looked everywhere in the base, even his room. She hadn't gone inside though, his room was locked. She'd knocked, and got no answer. She put her ear to the door, but not a sound could be heard from inside.
"I know he didn't go scouting, the transerver had no records of anyone leaving, and he couldn't possibly have scrambled the log. " Ciel pondered, "I wonder if he walked to town?"
"Why don't you go look for him," Cerveau suggested, "and make sure that he's not in trouble."
"Zero can take care of himself. I'm more worried about the fact that he didn't tell us before he left. " Ciel said, "He always does."
"You never know. Something might be bothering him."
"Maybe…" Ciel walked out of the base, and down the road that led to town.
I really hope he's alright. He's been acting more antisocial than normal.
Just a bit more, and you're mine.
It was cold. Zero felt the chill of the bathroom floor all over, and the cool blade of the knife cutting into the palm of his hand. The puddle of blood around him wasn't helping much, either.
I'm assuming I grabbed the knife? Zero could never remember much from his episodes. He sat up, slowly, wincing from the pain in his abdomen. He felt his hair with his good hand; it was tangled and matted with blood.
He pulled the knife from his hand, slowly. He couldn't tell how deep it had cut in, and his hand might even be cut in two, his under armor being the only support. He didn't dare move his fingers. If he messed up the direction of the knife, he'd cut his hand even more and risk slicing it in half, if it wasn't already.
"Ach!" The knife came out, sending out a flash of pain that let him know all too well that his hand was still intact.
Reaching over, he set the knife in the sink, and used the rim as a support as he stood up. He then opened the mirrored cabinet to get the tube of synthetic glue, so he could seal his (synthetic) skin back together, as well and his under armor. He'd done this many times beforehand, and Ciel had never noticed anything different.
Zero carefully pulled off his outer armor and helmet, and stepped into the shower.
First I need to fix my under armor and wash off the blood. I'll figure out what to do about my hair and the floor later.
Ciel walked into town, carefully scanning each store for Zero, and asking each clerk if they'd seen him. So far, he wasn't anywhere she'd been, and the answer had always been "no".
"It's already six! Downtown is super crowded! There's no possible way someone as antisocial and standoutish as Zero, would possibly go to such a crowded place!" Ciel said to herself, exasperated, "Where the hell is he?"
Ciel stomped about, until she ran into a mysterious stranger.
"Watch it!"Harpuia said, catching Ciel as she bounced off his chest.
"Yeah, you'll get stabbed with a rib or something!" Leviathan said, cracking herself up, and earning herself a nasty look from Harpuia.
"Ah! Sorry!" Ciel stuttered, flustered and still upset.
"Watcha doin' in such a rush?" Leviathan inquired, her constant curiosity once again getting the better of her.
"I'm looking for Zero, I can't find him anywhere." Ciel said, glancing around, just in case he was trailing behind them.
"Is he scouting?" Harpuia asked, "That's what he's usually doing when he disappears."
"Well, yeah, but he tells me or Cerveau, and the transerver would have data on where and when he left." Ciel explained. "And there was no data, and he didn't tell me or Cerveau"
"Is he sleeping?" Leviathan asked.
"His door was locked. He leaves it unlocked when he goes to sleep, just in case something comes up," Ciel said.
"Did he forget? He could have locked it for something, like a man thing, and fell asleep before he could unlock it."
"He snores." Ciel said bluntly.
Harpuia and Leviathan looked at her oddly. Obviously, she shouldn't know that.
"I don't know where he could have gone! He's not in the base, he's not in town, and he hasn't told us anything!"
"Is he in the bathroom?" Harpuia asked. "You don't know what he does in the evening."
"But he would have said something, even if he were in the bathroom!" Ciel said.
"You trust him too much, Ciel." Leviathan stated, "For all you know, he was asleep on the toilet."
Ciel pouted at the facts. Now, for all she knew, he was reading on his bed.
"Don't worry, Ciel, he's tough. Do you want us to help you look?" Harpuia suggested.
"Yeah, we can bother Zero until he gives us ice cream money!" Leviathan said excitedly.
Ciel laughed, "Okay, let's go."
Zero stepped out of the shower, holding his now mended under armor. He slipped into it, and gathered his bloodied armor in a pile on the shower floor, letting the water wash the blood off.
"What to do with the floor…" He couldn't wipe it up with a towel; Ciel usually did his laundry for him.
Would the blood be diluted if I mix it with water? Zero pondered for a minute, but then realized something useful.
Zero quickly opened the cabinet above the toilet, and pulled out an old, bloodstained towel from years before. He pulled that, and another regular towel out. He laid out the red towel on the blood and stepped on it, soaking up the blood. He reached over and turned off the shower, and proceeded to dry his outer armor with the other towel.
"Well, that problem was solved with relative ease." Zero sighed.
Zero set the dried armor to the side, and dried the inside of his helmet absently.
You haven't solved anything yet.
Zero jumped and looked around.
"Who…?" No one was there. His room was locked, so no one could have come in.
Me.
Clang!
Zero dropped his helmet. The voice had come, from him. His mind. He stood up, suddenly horrified. So utterly, completely horrified.
"Who are you? Why are you here?" Zero clutched his head.
You know who I am, Zero. You know why I'm here.
"N-no! I don't know you!" Zero's voice was soft, very soft.
You've always known me. I'm you.
"No! Go away!"
I'll go away when you break.
"What?" Zero pressed his back against the wall, and slid down.
Don't worry. Looking at you now, that won't be too long
"…" Zero wrapped his arms around his head and buried it between his legs, lost in thought.
Glad we've come to an agreement.
Ciel, Harpuia, and Leviathan walked into the base.
"Well, welcome back." Cerveau said as they walked into his lab. "Did you find Zero?"
"Nope." Leviathan said. "But I bet he's just being antisocial and locked himself in his room just for the heck or it."
"That's an awfully rude way to put it." Harpuia said. "But it might be true."
"So, are all three of you going to go check and see if he's there?" Cerveau asked.
"Well, duh!" Leviathan said.
With that, Leviathan grabbed Harpuia and Ciel by the arm and dragged them down the hall to Zero's room.
"Are you sure he's going to be in there?" Harpuia asked. "He might be doing… Stuff."
"Stuff?" Ciel asked. "Like what kind of stuff?"
"Like, um…" Harpuia started, "H… stuff…He might be… doing… H… stuff… and um, yeah."
"What's 'H'?" Ciel questioned, innocently.
"Sex!" Leviathan said, not approving of Harpuia's stuttering, "He's having sex!"
"Ehh?" Ciel gasped. "With who? Why?"
"With your mom, because she's hot, that's who and why!" Leviathan snapped.
"My mom's dead!"
"Well, her ghost, then!"
"How is that possible?"
"How is Zero possible?"
"…" Ciel knew all too well that she'd just lost a fight, which was a relief. She'd heard too much in a few short seconds.
"Major T.M.I." Harpuia said meekly.
"Well, excuse me for finishing your sentence!" Leviathan said.
"At least I was going to say it subtly, stupid." Harpuia barked.
Growing irritated, Leviathan wacked Hapruia in the head, only to be hit right back.
Ciel stood quite blankly as the two began their scuffle, and soon decided to sneak away to Zero's room before they could involve her.
Zero sat on the bathroom floor, shaken and confused.
"What do I do?" Zero whispered to himself. "What do I do?"
Act naturally, stupid. You'll be on suicide watch in a minute if you walk around like this.
Zero snapped upright, bouncing on the balls of his feet. It would be normal for someone to decide on what to do, and hop right to it. Completely normal. But only if they themselves had done it.
"Huh?" Zero could only watch helplessly as his body moved on its own accord, as Omega took control of his body.
Deciding that he should do what Omega wanted him to do, Zero took over, putting on his armor, and wiping up what was left of the blood.
Right after he hung the towel up over the shower door, he heard a knock on the door.
"Zero?" Someone called.
Zero washed the bit of blood on his hands off in the sink, threw the knife in the shower, and quickly walked over to the door.
"Zero!" Ciel called again, knocking on the door. She could hear activity in his room; flustered activity. Like he didn't want whoever was at the door to see what he had been doing.
Ciel, haunted by Harpuia and Leviathan's idea about what Zero had been doing, began to panic.
Is he hiding someone in a closet? Putting clothes on? Washing something off?
Ciel practically fainted from the horror of her imagination, when the door opened.
"Yes, Ciel?" Zero was standing at the door, looking spic and span, and slightly nervous.
Ciel stared at him, scanning him fully and completely.
"What were you doing in there?" Ciel finally asked.
"I was in the bathroom," Zero said. "Taking a shower.
"Is that it?" Ciel asked. "Why were you moving around so much?"
"I was getting dressed." Zero said quickly.
Ciel caught how fast he said it. It was too fast to have been said casually.
"Are you sure that was it?" Ciel pushed further.
"Positive." Zero said, once again, too quickly.
Something's up. Something is definitely up.
"Is that all you need?" Zero asked.
"Yeah, you locked the door, so I didn't know if you were in your room or not." Ciel explained.
"Oh, sorry." Zero said. "I might have accidentally locked it when I leaned against the wall."
"Why were you leaning against the wall?" Ciel pursued unnecessarily.
"Why do you need to know that?"
"I'm a girl. I'm curious."
"I was changing the password and reading at the same time." Zero explained.
"Ah." Ciel said. "I see."
Authors Note:
Originally, this was going to be submitted to SubZeroChimera's fanfic contest on DeviantArt, but laptop somewow got a virus when it downloaded a picture that my friend sent me. It wiped out almost all of my data, even my bookmarks! I finally got rid of it yesterday, with the help of my brother, but it was too late to recover anything without digging deep. So, I typed up a rough copy of the original story on a public computer at my library, and managed to e-mail it safely here for you to see. The story's going to be MUCH longer than this, but it'll take a while for me and my brother to hack into the hard drive and pull out the stuff from there. Anyways, I wasn't able to meet the deadline, and it's going to take too long to get the whole thing up in once piece. Okay, okay, I'll leave you be!