Title: The Prince's Worst Fear
Sumary: The tragic secert of Severus Snape's suffering has now been revealed to the last person he ever wanted to know. Harry learns of his most despised teacher's tormented past.
Disclaimer: I own nothing of JK Rowlings brillant work.
Warning: Contains Deathly Hallows SPOLIERS!
Harry's unhopeful attitude about the upcoming afternoon was weighing him down with every sluggish step he took forward. As he fought the urge to turn the other direction, he tried to convince himself that the next hour would at least be bearable. Harry was not looking forward to Defense Against the Dark Arts today. Although he always he did amazingly well in the class and it was no doubt his favorite subject, he now dreaded it. Harry's least favorite teacher, Professor Snape, after so many years of failure, finally acquired the DADA job. Harry now found that his dislike for his potion classes from the previous years seemed to follow him to Defense Against the Dark Arts. No doubt Snape was the cause of all this recent bitterness about his favorite subject. Harry now loathed sitting in the classroom that once held many exciting lessons and fond memories. Now the classroom was gloomy and disturbing, and full of intense and tedious lessons. Harry always found himself counting the minutes until class was over so he could see the sunlight again. But soon after the relief of being free from the dark dreary classroom, and out of the presence of his most despised teacher, he found himself overwhelmed with stressed when swimming in an endless pile of dull homework.
He continued walking forward, holding onto the little bit of hope that told him the hour would go by quickly. Unfortunately, Harry realized, that the slower pace he took, the quicker class would not get out. As he approached the door, he took a deep sigh and gradually walked into the dreary classroom, but it felt more like walking into a prison cell.
"Late again, Potter?," said a deep silky voice, just as he stepped inside. Harry looked up to see the source of his miserable day, the pale, sallow face of Severus Snape framed by a mop of greasy black hair.
"I believe five points from Gryffindor will be a sufficient punishment," he said, not once looking up from a piece of parchment in his hands.
Harry frowned in annoyance, he was just on time. He tried to shoot Snape his hateful look, but Snape's dark eyes never looked up from the parchment he was reading, and Harry wondered how he even knew he had entered the room. Harry grunted and sat down next Ron and Hermione, while noticing that other kids continued to stroll in after he did, and that Snape did not say anything to them. Harry was used to being treated unfairly by Snape, but it did not stop him from clenching his fists in anger.
Once everyone was in their seat, Snape swooped up from his desk and stood glaring at the class. "Quiet now…," he said even though the class had gone silent the moment he stood up. "Today we will be doing a considerably dull lesson in preparation for your OWLS. I find this trivial lesson to be quite useless for real world situations, and I do not understand the importance of even wasting valuable time on it in the first place... However, it seems as though I have no say in such matters, so I hope to get through this quick and painlessly…"
Me too, Harry thought.
"Now, does anyone know what a boggart is?"
Hermonie's hand shot up.
Snape's eyes swept right past her hand, ignoring it, as usual, "No one? Pity… How displeasing… "
Hermonie frowned and put her hand down. Snape continued, "A boggart is a shape-shifter that takes form into ones' greatest fear. Using the defensive spell Riddikulus will force its shape into something some may find… amusing. The charm requires concentration and a strong mind to look past petty fears. Laughter, as much of senseless noise as it is, ironically is the boggart's weakness. I assure you, such pointless charms as Riddikulus are not very valuable, but I suppose it's my job to endure pleasing tasks such as this…" Snapes voices dripped with sarcasm, "so let's get this over with."
With a bored expression on his face, Snape swiftly strode to the back of the classroom. The class followed him with puzzled looks, and formed a line in front of a wardrobe that was wobbling from side to side. "The boggart is inside the wardrobe, each of you will have a turn. Ready now?" Snape pointed his wand at the handle of the wardrobe without waiting for anyone to answer.
The wardrobe flew open, and with a loud pop a figure appeared before them. Ron, who was first in line, backed up looking frightened at the approaching spider that just formed in front of him. Ron pointed his shaking wand at the spider and yelled, "Riddikulus!" Then roller skates appeared on each of the spiders' legs and it started rolling around the room. It was a funny sight, and the class roared with laughter.
Angrily, Snape turned away and leaned against the wall looking irritated. Harry watched him stare straight ahead, not bothering to pay any attention to them, while looking rather annoyed and uninterested. Today's lesson plans were clearly not his choice. All this laughing must be making him sick; Harry purposely laughed loader with Ron, as each person in the class had their turn, while Snape continued to scowl at the wall.
Unease swept over Harry as he realized he was next in line. He became slightly nervous because he was not entirely sure what form the boggart would take for him, but he tried not to worry about what it would be like to have to face his greatest fear, whatever it was, in front of the class. Harry tensely stepped forward toward the snake boggart that Seamus had just turned into a slithering gummy worm. Out of the corner of Harry's eye, he noticed Snape's head snap in his direction with sudden attentiveness.
The gummy worm begun shifting shapes and a blur of darkness suddenly appeared to form a huge black cloak; the black cloak of a dementor. It's hooded face lunged at Harry, who was quickly began losing all sense of feeling and emotion. All he could feel was the instant cold closing in on him, leaving him helpless and alone…
The class screamed with terror and Harry, feeling so disorientated as the dementor swept eerily across the room, began slowly falling backward as it approached him. Just as Harry was about to hit the ground, large pale hands caught him by the robes. Snape pulled Harry back up to his feet while lunging into a protective stance between him and the dementor. Just as he did, Harry felt the severe cold vanish from his body, and he began to feel alive again, as the life crept back into his soul. Then just as suddenly as the dementor appeared, it disappeared, blurring to change form to a new fear. The blur of images finally arranged into one, but Harry couldn't see what it was behind Snape's protective shielding. The classes' sounds of fear cut off, and a shocked silence was all that remained. Harry began to feel unease at the classes' stillness. Even Snape was remaining entirely motionless. Harry could feel every eye on him and whatever it was that lay beyond the man that stood protecting him.
Harry looked past Snape, who was now, Harry realized, frozen with fear, and as he did he quickly understood the fierce tension that was now cast upon the room. Perplexed, Harry realized that he was now staring back at himself, his emerald green eyes looking back into his own. Only Harry was not looking into a mirror, and those green eyes were not his. The expression he was wearing did not belong to Harry, smugness and mocking set in every line of this face. The arrogant face of the Boggart, the face of Harry, seemed to be trying to suppress the urge to burst with laughter.
Snape was so still that Harry would have thought he'd been petrified if it wasn't for his arm, which was now shaking violently; the arm that contained his wand. But his wand was now pointing at the floor rather than straight ahead for defense . The Boggart Harry, now grinning at Snape, made his smirk more pronounced as he tried to hold back his taunting laughter. "Your secret's out, you pathetic," he said sneering.
Snape took a sharp intake of breath, and then could not make any movements other than involuntarily shaking. The Boggart Harry, who seemed very entertained by Snape's reaction, continued, "Did you honestly believe that anyone could ever love you?! HA! What a joke!", and he began laughing as though he had just heard the funniest joke ever. "Especially not her! How could you think she could feel anything other than disgust for you? You were nothing more than a disgrace to her, you ugly git!" he said through his laughter.
Who was he talking about!? He must have been lying, surely Harry didn't think that Snape was cable of any emotion at all, let alone love. There is no way Snape has ever felt love toward anything, other than his chemistry set possibly. Snape and love were non existing together, trying to imagine it was impossible. And what did Harry have to do with this? Why did the boggart turn into him? There is no possible way Snape would ever feel fearful of Harry. It seemed more likely that a lion would be afraid of a mouse. This must be some sick joke that Snape is playing on him, it has to be.
But then Harry peered up to look at Snape's face, which had somehow become paler than usual, and the utter horror there was impossible to deny. Snape's eyes were tear stricken and his lips were trembling. It was the first time Harry had ever seen any true emotion in those cold black eyes. Harry was now just as frozen in shock as Snape was. There was no way Harry could doubt the terror that could be read plainly on his face, and it was terror of him. The Boggart Harry, who was very amused by Snape's horrified expression, arrogantly snickered.
"How could you ever think that someone like you, a disgusting, worthless excuse for a human being, could ever be with someone like Lily Evans?! HAHAHAHA!," the Boggart Harry said while trying not to fall over with laughter.
My… my mother…? What Harry was hearing was beyond him, he must have been imagining it, there was no other explanation. What connected could Snape and his mother possibly have? He felt almost as sick as Snape now looked. The Boggart Harry, while pointing and laughing at Snape, was yelling "I can't believe it! What a joke!" between screams of laughter.
Calming his hilarity down enough to speak again, he continued his taunts, "You were nothing to her. NOTHING! My mother thought you were sick, greasy, good-for-nothing creep! She despised you… you were an embarrassment to her," his harsh voice rang throughout the motionless classroom.
Snape was now shaking so violently it looked like he was having a stroke. Tears were stinging at his eyes, and he looked like as if he was being tortured. Harry now understood Snape's terror. Not only was Snape's greatest fear standing right in front of him, mocking him in front of the class, but his greatest fear was also happening right behind him.
Harry now knew Snape's deepest secret, worst nightmare, and the reason for his miserable, empty life. Snape has loved his mother, and she never loved him back. Lily chose the man that he despised, and not him. Snape could not bare Harry knowing the truth of his deepest heartbreak. Showing emotion was something Harry knew Snape thought as weak. He even once went as far as saying to him that only fools wear emotions on their sleeves. But Snape's deepest emotions and greatest fears are now are revealed, laid out for everyone to see. Plain on his face were the secrets to his repressed memories and agonized past he must have suffered from for so long.
The secret was out.
With looks of deep satisfaction and pleasure, the Boggart Harry began laughing so hard that he had to clench his stomach. "My father is everything you never were, and he got the future you deluded yourself into believing you could have. You will always be a disgusting, worthless freak, Snivellus. Because that's all you ever were to her; a miserable, filthy COWARD!"
Snape's hand twitched so hard that he dropped his wand and his sobs could no longer be contained. Something the Boggart said finally triggered Snape to find his feet. When he did he flew out of the room without his tear stricken eyes meeting anyone's, as he placed is hands over his face to hide his shame. His agonized face carefully avoided Harry's eyes, Lily's eyes, and he knew Snape would forever avoid his gaze. Once Snape disappeared, Harry looked across from him, into his own green eyes for a moment, then the smirking boggart winked at Harry and disappeared, knowing that fear had triumphed.
A/N: So I was very interested in the idea of what Snape's boggart would be and I assume that it has to do with Lily since Rowling has refused to tell us. I know that there are many other possibilities of what Snape's boggart could be, but I thought this idea was very interesting. Let me know any other ideas you have on what Snape's boggart might of been! I'd love to hear them.
And I know that OWLs are taken in 5th year and Snape did not get the DADA till 6th year, so just assume that OWLs are taken in 6th year.
I may add more to the ending, but I hit some writers block so we'll see! Posting reviews would be greatly appreciated!