Bananas
By Concolor44
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A/N: Bananas are a very, very versatile fruit.
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Titans' Tower, 4:30pm
"Just wait'll you see it!" called the shape-shifter over his shoulder as he dragged Terra along through the Tower's main hallway at a near-run. "I couldn't believe my luck!"
She, always finding his excitement contagious, laughed aloud and said, "All this fuss over some fruit."
"Fruit?!" he answered indignantly. They skidded to a stop in front of the Common Room doors, which allowed Nightwing and Starfire to catch up to them. The four had been on an all-day double date when Changeling got a late-morning text message on his T-Com about a delivery to the Tower. He was antsy the rest of the day. "Fruit?! I'll have you know that bananas are the most commonly consumed fruit item on the planet! There are tons of people who depend on 'em to survive! Why, there's hundreds of different …"
"Whoa, whoa there, Skippy, cool your jets. I'm not throwin' off on your snack food of choice. I like bananas as well as the next girl." Casting a sidelong glance at Starfire, she snickered and said, "Although maybe not as well as some."
The alien had discovered bananas early in her sojourn on Earth, and found she liked them almost as much as mustard (and occasionally would dip the one in the other). Gar's news that he had secured an entire, fresh bunch was, in her estimation, 'most glorious'.
They'd always been a favorite for Nightwing as well; and he knew that Vic liked them. He wasn't too sure about Raven, but he thought he'd seen her eat them a time or two. And Jinx was a complete unknown, having only lived at the Tower for about three weeks. But she'd eaten everything they put in front of her so far (walking around with an empty stomach two days out of three for most of your early life will do that for a body). Gar wasn't worried. He figured every Titan would be thrilled with his windfall. "And free and gratis 'cause I saved his ship from those pirate dudes last month!"
Nightwing asked (again), "Are you sure this falls under the fifty-dollar limit for gifts and gratuities? We don't want …"
"Chill, dude! He sells 'em wholesale, fifty-two cents a kilo, he said. Not to worry, I'm sure it ain't more than forty kilos, maybe forty-five, tops. You got nothin' to stress over."
"Okay. Good."
Gar put a hand on the activation plate and struck a dramatic pose. "Now for the reveal!"
Terra gave an exaggerated roll of the eyes, which he did not miss, and he pouted at her. She giggled and explained, "Raven's not here to glare at you. That was the best I could do."
"Party pooper." He straightened and hit the panel, the doors swiftly sliding open to show …
… utter chaos.
Four mouths dropped open as the Titans slowly surveyed the damage. Shattered glass lay all over the place. The dining table was broken in half, and a double handful of smashed dishes littered the floor in front of the kitchen. The charred remains of a wooden crate were splattered over much of the floor. Two of the cushions from the couch had apparently exploded. The big flat-screen lay in several pieces, the large window behind it a maze of spider-webbed cracks. And covering most surfaces in the room (especially the ceiling) was a moist, glistening, yellow-brown sludge: it still dripped slowly from a few points. Several dozen banana peels were scattered here and there, with perhaps half a dozen relatively-whole bananas to be seen, and the scent of fried banana hung heavy in the air.
Gar stood there, his shoulders sagging, eyes bugged, for maybe twenty seconds. Then he turned and yelled down the hall, "RAAAAAVEEEEEEN!"
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A Good Bit Earlier …
Jinx was sprawled across the sofa, channel surfing, when the doorbell rang. She sat up a moment, blinking, not really sure what the noise was, but then it came again and she recalled Vic's explanation during the nickel tour of the Tower's facilities. Flipping over the back of the couch, she ran to the elevator. Thirty seconds later, she was opening the man-door at the Tower's base.
The youngish FedEx delivery guy gave her a once-up-and-down and then blinked at her. "… Um … are, uh … are you a Titan?"
"Honorary. I'm new." She stuck her hand out. "Name's Jinx."
"Um …" He looked at her hand, then up at her face, then back at her hand, and cautiously shook it. "I, uh … thought you were, um …"
"Yeah, I was. But bein' a super-villain just don't pay the bills around here. I'm doin' that hero thing now."
"Oh. Okay." He mulled that over a moment while scratching his head under his cap and then shrugged and held out a pad. "Got a delivery for Changeling."
"For real? What is it?"
"Got no clue. Big box, though. Climate-controlled shipping, too."
"Okay, cool. I'll sign for it."
She could see the 'No skin off my nose' expression that flitted across his face as she scribbled her moniker on the pressure-sensitive surface.
He stared at it and then shrugged again. "Be right back." And very soon he returned with a dolly toting a crate measuring about seventy centimeters square by a meter tall. "Where ya want it?"
"Ehhhrrmmmm … how heavy is it?"
He checked the manifest. "Fifty-six kilos."
"Ouch. Okay, uh … yeah, can you set it … hey, can you follow me upstairs with it?"
He did, finally depositing the box in the middle of the Common Room. Jinx shook his hand again. "Thanks a bunch! I didn't really feel up to lugging that thing all this way."
"Just part of the service, miss." And he was gone.
Jinx walked around the box a couple of times and looked at the writing stenciled on the side. "Huh. 'Brasilia', eh? Okay, Green Bean, what you got comin' from South America?" She rubbed her hands together and examined the way it was fastened, finding what appeared to be basic nails tacking everything together. Not bothering to look for a crowbar, she instead focused a very tight beam of hex energy at the nails holding the top on. Very shortly, it was off, propped against the side of the crate. Inside that, though, was a tightly-fitted, heavily-waxed, thick cardboard box. To her delight, there was a picture of a bunch of bananas on the top. "Sweet!" In not much longer than it takes to tell, she had that box open and was taking a deep, appreciative sniff of the fruit inside. "Hot damn! They're ripe! Musta cost a bundle to ship the fresh stuff!" She had noted the way the huge bunch was suspended from four points at the top and anchored in three places farther down. Carefully twisting one of the bright yellow fruits off the stem, she peeled it and wolfed it down. "Oh, man …" she moaned, her eyes closed, "oh, MAN! Can't get that at the local MaxiMart."
She backed off and studied the box, a feral grin growing on her pretty face. "Oh, yeah. Lessee, I need …" she muttered, hopping toward the kitchen. She began frantically looking through the cabinets, pulling out ingredients. "All right … cinnamon … ooo, dark brown sugar, yeah! … I know we've got some butter … annnnnnnnd … ah-HA! I knew Stone still had some rum! Whoa, didn't know it was the 151 stuff. That oughta burn for sure. Good thing he didn't take it with him when he went east chasin' Bee." She assembled her things on the counter, and then thought hard. "Still need some ice cream. And we don't have any banana schnapps, and that might be a problem." Then she brightened, remembering her fake ID. "Okay, just gotta get those brown contacts an' magic some temporary black into my hair, an' I'll be gold." And she tripped out of the room, adding, "They still got marshmallows. Oughta get some dark chocolate and some peanut butter, too, while I'm at it."
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Somewhat Later …
It was decidedly unlike Raven to follow her nose around the Tower … but then no aroma such as the one currently pulling her along had ever graced its halls before.
She stopped briefly just outside the Common Room doors, extending her empathic field into that area. Startled, she touched down lightly and frowned.
Jinx.
Jinx was in there. She was in there, and that had to be where that incredible smell was coming from. Raven was determined to find out what it was (and perhaps sample a bit) but the puzzle of Jinx had kept her in various levels of 'flustered' for the last twenty days. Nightwing had commented on it last week, but she just brushed him off. He was used to that sort of response, though, and it didn't bother him. He figured she'd let him in on it if she couldn't work it out on her own.
But that was slowly solidifying itself as a difficulty the depths of which she was unable to plumb. She couldn't figure Jinx out. It wasn't that she didn't (exactly) trust that the hex caster had really turned over a new leaf. By all reasonable measures, she had, and Raven wasn't worried on that score. No, it was this disturbing … aura … that she gave off whenever Raven was around …
Predatory without being dangerous.
(Or maybe dangerous without being focused? Like she's up to something tricky but not evil?)
Intrigued without being nosy.
(Or maybe nosy without being intrusive? A cat-like curiosity?)
There was some kind of interest there, if only she could accurately place it. She'd consulted her Emotions twice on the subject, and come up empty. Well, okay, Wisdom had given her this knowing look, and Joy had given her a distinctly coy one. Whatever that meant.
Sighing her frustration, she went on into the room.
The smell was much stronger here, almost heady, and Raven floated over to the kitchen, where sat Jinx. Dressed in a band tee and some pink capris, she was perched cross-legged on the counter with a large bowl in her lap, ladling some gooey, brown-and-yellow mixture into her mouth with a big spoon and letting go with tiny, satisfied noises at every bite.
Raven's salivary glands kicked on the afterburners.
"Jinx? What in the world is that?"
The other girl had her hair down, and it bounced around her as she giggled. "Hi, Rae!" She waved her spoon unsteadily and caught herself before falling off. "Fanshee meetin' you here!"
Raven blinked at her. "Jinx? Are you … drunk?"
"Aw, hell, no! Jus' a li'l budge … a li'l buggug … I'm got a li'l buzz. Yeah, buzz." She waved her spoon around. "Not 'nuff rum in 'iss stuff t' git me good 'n' proper drunk."
Raven peeked into the bowl. The incredible aroma hit her full force. Giving Jinx a furtive glance, she dipped a finger in the mixture and licked it off. "Oh. Oh! … Oh, my."
"Good stuff, ain't it?"
"What is it?"
"Bananas Foshter. 's my recipe."
"… You can cook?"
The pink eyes took on a look of hurt. "I am woon-ded. Woon-ded that you would think I can't cook. Who d'ya think kep' aw those idiots in th' H.I.V.E. Five fr'm starvin', huh?" She reached around behind her and rummaged for a second or two before producing another spoon, which she offered to Raven. "Jump on in." She giggled again. "Th' Foshter's fine."
Raven hardly needed any urging. She floated up and positioned herself on the counter opposite Jinx, digging the spoon in and allowing the excess to dribble off before guiding it to her mouth. Then she leaned back against the cabinet, a look of utter ecstasy covering her face. "That … is … the most … intensely … amazing thing … I have ever tasted."
"Yeah, 's pretty good. Beatsa livin' shit outta frozen pizza."
A chime sounded, startling them both. Then Jinx grinned. "Heeeee! Got sumpin' else you'll like, too." She hopped off the counter and retrieved a bowl from the microwave, presenting it to Raven.
The empath stared at the dark-brown-and-white goop. "What is that?"
"Godiva Extra Dark. An' marshmallows."
"… Okay. Um, what are you supposed to …"
"Oh, an' ya gotta add peanut butter." She fished a jar from a drawer. "Got th' good kind. Mill-ground an' no perservavives."
Raven still didn't see.
"Oh! Right. Gotta have a banana." She scooted around and trotted over to a large box that Raven had missed upon first entering the room. Reaching in and giving a quick twist, she came up with a banana. "These 'r' ripe. Ol' Greenie really pulled one off this time. Came this morn'n."
Repositioning herself on the counter, Jinx grabbed the bowl of marshmallow-chocolate goodness and plopped a big spoonful of peanut butter into it. She gave it a couple of quick stirs and then peeled the banana. Depositing a glob of the combination on the end of the ripe fruit, she offered it to Raven.
Dubiously, the dark Titan took the banana and gave Jinx a raised eyebrow. "Just … bite it?"
"Duh."
Okay. I wouldn't have thought to put these different things together, but … She took a bite. Her eyes slid shut as she chewed reflectively. Swallowing, her face stretched into a smile.
"Heh. Knew ya'd like it."
"Jinx. You are a genius."
"Aw shucks. Tweren't nothin'."
They alternated between the chocolate confection and the rum-laden dessert for a while until little was left of either. Then Jinx squinted at the shorter girl and said, "Y'r a messy eater."
Raven gave her a minor glare. "This's messy food." She tried to use her spoon to indicate the bowl in Jinx's lap, but her aim wasn't very good due to the late tendency that her eyes had developed to cross spontaneously. Instead, she flipped a little piece of banana onto Jinx's shirt. "I dunno whiieey … I let you talk me into this." She had begun to use her left arm to steady herself some time earlier, but it was getting more problematic by the minute.
"I di'n talk you inta nothin'." Jinx picked the banana off and ate it. "You talked y'rself right on in."
"You made the Banananans Foshter!"
"I di'n tie that shpoon t' y'r hand, girl!"
Crossing her arms and leaning back, Raven grumped, "You're mean."
"I'm not mean! I made couple things you really liked. How's 'at mean?"
Her brain not firing on all (or even most) of its cylinders, Raven had to think about that one a while. "Gonna make me fat."
"Pfftt. Like that'll ev'r happen."
"Gonna get fat. Blow up like a balloon. Eat Foshters ever' day and blow up like a balloon. Heeheehee! Balloon. Balloon." She grinned. "Balloonaloonaloonaloon. Balloooooooooooooon."
"You are drunk."
"Now how c'n I be drunk when I di'n drink? Answer me dat."
"Guess ya mus' be buzz, 'k?"
"I guess."
"Still messy."
"I don't care." Raven used half a banana to wipe the remaining chocolate mixture from the bowl. "Y'know … we di'n have good shtuff t'eat much in Azaraff."
"… Huh?"
" 's where I'm from." She frowned in concentration and slowly pronounced, "Azz-err-ath."
"Never heard of it."
"It's not on Erfff."
Jinx giggled. "Y'r talkin' funny."
"Ha-ha, Missh Mishprenuncipation." She stopped and blinked and thought that over, then laughed out loud. "Thass funny! I mishpronounced mishpronouncipation."
"I'll tell ya funny. Thass you."
"… Don't care." She eyed Jinx's bowl. "There any o' that shtuff left?"
"Sure. Lots. But why dontcha eat whatcha dribbled all over y'self first?"
Raven glanced down at her cloak and pouted. "Well, that's a wayshte." She picked up one edge of the garment and licked off a drip of chocolate, then got a sugary piece of banana off another area.
Jinx watched her, fascinated.
Finally noticing Jinx's appraisal, the empath fuzzily stared at her. "There somethin' wrong?"
Her grin growing steadily, Jinx answered, "Nope. Ain't a thing wrong at all." She set the bowl to the side and leaned toward the Titan. "But you got some drips on y'r chin. Here, lemme help." She reached a finger over and slowly, softly ran it up one side of Raven's mouth, then drew back her hand and languidly, deliberately sucked the chocolate off that finger, never breaking eye contact.
Raven popped a light sheen of sweat. The feelings coming off the pink-haired girl were … new. Different. She couldn't really place them, especially in her present state of inebriation. But the sensations, nearly overwhelming in their intensity, both excited and frightened her.
Jinx moved closer. "We gotta get ya cleaned up 'fore th' others get back."
"… Clean … cleaned up?" Her voice rose an octave on that last word.
"Mm-hmm." Like a stalking cat, Jinx approached smoothly, her gaze never leaving her 'prey'. "Good 'n' clean."
Their faces were about five centimeters apart. Raven's heart rate jumped alarmingly and she took a couple of quick breaths.
Jinx leaned in. Her long, pink tongue darted out and licked a drip of caramel off Raven's chin. That's when two of the cabinet doors were encased in crackling black energy and ripped from their hinges. Neither girl paid that any attention.
Raven was petrified. Her mind was too disassembled at that point to analyze what was happening. But it was new and different and exciting and altogether unexpected.
Jinx licked her lips and leaned in again, taking off a smudge of peanut butter from the other side of Raven's chin. She hadn't blinked yet.
That was when the big flat screen and the main window fell apart.
Raven let slip an involuntary moan, which only encouraged Jinx. She smiled, a small, almost shy one, and slowly leaned forward until their breaths mingled.
Several lights blew, and then the microwave.
"I'll stop if you want me to." This was whispered against Raven's flushed lips.
In answer, Raven reached up and twined her fingers into the pink mass at Jinx's neck, and pulled them together the last couple of millimeters.
Pandemonium erupted.
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Back To The Here And Now …
"RAAAAAVEEEEEEN!"
Changeling stomped down the main hall and turned into the residential wing, Terra following right behind with a worried look in her big, blue eyes. Starfire had stayed with Nightwing, who wanted to make sure his systems were still secure.
The shape-shifter was beyond livid, and wanted Some Justice where his precious bananas were concerned. This tended to give him tunnel vision, so he didn't really notice Raven's cloak lying on the floor at the junction of the halls. Neither did he see, as they made their way down the hall, a chocolate-smeared Modest Mouse tee-shirt, or Raven's boots, or a pair of pink capris.
He pounded hard on Raven's door. "Open up, Rae!"
The door swung open. He blinked at it, and then poked his head inside. The normally-dark state of her room was undisturbed. Everything looked normal. And no Raven.
Terra poked his arm. "Hey, Gar."
"Yeah?" He pulled the door closed.
She pointed down the hall to Jinx's room. "I think she's in there."
"Oh, really?" His brow darkened again. "Thinks she can hide in there, does she?" And he stalked over.
Terra spotted a black bra crumpled against the baseboard. "Um, Gar, I don't think you oughta …"
"I'll tell ya what I think: I think she owes me a ripe bunch o' bananas, that's what I think! Blowin' up the microwave now and then is one thing, but this is just …"
"Gar!" called Terra, running to catch up with him. "I really, really don't …"
He didn't bother knocking this time. "All right, Rae, you got some ex…plaining … to …
. . . . . pale, bare legs against gray skin . . . . .
. . . . . a heaving bosom, the dark nipples stiff . . . . .
. . . . . a svelte waist curving into . . . . .
Jinx looked up and grinned from where she was licking a viscous substance from Raven's lower belly. "Heeeyyy, Greenie!"
Gar's eyes rolled back into his head. Terra caught him before he fell, yelling, "Sorry, ladies! Carry on!" She dragged him away and then nudged the door shut with a foot.
Jinx looked down at Raven. "I think he fainted."
"I think we broke him."
"I heard 'im yellin' 'bout his bananas."
"I did kinda make a mess of 'em."
"We oughta get him some more."
"Oh, we will for sure get more 'nanas." She indicated the empty bowl on the bed beside them. "We're 'bout outta Foshter, an' you gotta make more."
"Got that right." She grinned at the empath. "Now that I've found out what it's really good for."
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A/N: You'd think, wouldn't you, after all this time, that Gar would have learned not to just barge in on Raven. Not good for the health.
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