THE DAY EVERYTHING STARTED
July 4th, 845
He didn't know for how much time he had been running but he still ran without thought. He couldn't hear anything in his surroundings other than the heavy beat of his heart in his ears. He had lost sight of his two friends for a while now. He was drenched in sweat and his legs hurt, but he kept running.
Suddenly he was tackled to the ground from behind by someone much smaller than him, but very strong.
"Bertholdt!! Can you hear me!?" The blonde girl on top of him asked frantically, covered in sweat and panting in exertion.
The boy in question could finally hear something other than his heartbeat in his ears and turned to the girl with relief.
"A-Annie...I can...hear you." The boy replied, panting harshly.
"Come on, we have to move. I saw Reiner run that way, if we don't hurry up, we'll lose track of him." She informed, still panting, slowly getting up and helping Bertholdt do the same.
"Okay, lead the way." The taller boy said, standing up, calmer now that Annie was here.
They started to run towards the direction Reiner supposedly went for more than fifteen minutes until they got out of the forest, and entered in a field of green grass.
Meanwhile their blond companion was panicking completely, crouching under a tree's shade, he turned around to see that none of his comrades were behind him.
"Bertholdt? ...Annie?" He whispered and then everything that happened came back to his mind.
Gasping he called for Marcel's name with agony in his voice, "M-Marcel!?"
He was eaten...by a titan...to protect...me. He's dead...because of me. The boy thought, lying with his face inches from the ground, hands in his hair.
Have the others been eaten?! What should I do? I can't stay here...I have to find the others...I can't be...the only one...still alive.
The boy didn't notice the quick footsteps that neared him until he was suddenly kicked in the side.
He rolled away, screaming in terror.
"You surprise me Reiner. This is the first time you beat both of us in a long distance run." Annie's tone was unimpressed, contrasting what she said. Behind her, Bertholdt was kneeling, exhausted, covered in sweat and panting in exertion. Reiner looked at them in relief, before noticing the expression on Annie's face. It was one of pain, though she wasn't hurt physically.
"Dammit...if only...you had transformed, then Marcel wouldn't be dead..." The girl murmured, starting to cry in grief as she thought about what happened to her friend.
"Why didn't you transform?" Annie wasn't asking that to Reiner, but to Marcel and herself.
She couldn't understand why Marcel didn't transform after he got grabbed by that titan, or why she just stood there and watched like an idiot as he was eaten.
She only moved when Bertholdt grabbed her hand and dragged her away. It was like her brain switched off at the exact moment that titan appeared. She only regained control of her senses when she was separated from Bertholdt.
"Where did that fucking titan even come from!?" Screamed Reiner, looking at Annie's grieving expression with anger.
"It suddenly springed up from the ground." Bertholdt answered him with tears in his eyes.
"But the Marleyans said that we would encounter titans only when we got close to the walls!!"
"They also said that not all titans behave normally."
Silence surrounded the three Warriors.
They were emotionally challenged after losing a friend and comrade which they spent more than five years with.
"Shit, what do we do now that Marcel is gone?" That question left a bitter taste in Annie's mouth and she stopped breathing for a few seconds.
But it was the truth, Marcel was dead, her friend of five years who was the second closest person to her, was dead.
She saw him get chewed by that fucking titan with her own eyes and nobody will see him ever again.
Not her, not Reiner, not Bertholdt, not Pieck and not even the brother he left behind in Marley.
The realization of that made Annie feel lightheaded, and she fell to the ground with the urge to throw up.
How could she face Porco ever again after what happened to his brother, after she watched his brother die?
Thinking about that made her ask herself if they could actually complete the mission, and survive without Marcel leading them. She doesn't believe they can.
"None of us were born to lead people...like he was...we won't be able to capture the Founding Titan without his guidance. We already had a small chance to begin with and now that he's gone we're doomed." She said in a heartbroken tone.
Reiner looked at Annie in shock after hearing what she said. Is she giving up on the mission? The boy wondered.
The girl, much smaller and shorter than him, who flipped him on his back without effort during his first day at close combat training.
The girl who taught him and the others about the art of fighting.
The girl who still flips him on his back when they train, even after five years from their first day.
The girl that Bertholdt is fond of, that he looked and still looks at with adoration from the first time he laid his jade eyes on her cerulean ones, is giving up?
The Warchief had said that the mission wouldn't have been easy, but Reiner never thought that he would lose one of his best friends or that he would witness the breakdown of the great Annie Leonhart in front of his very eyes, before it even started.
Can he really take control of the situation? Him?...The worst out of the six warriors?...
Porco should have gotten the Armored Titan. Reiner thought in his mind.
Because even though the fact that he would have lived 15 years, upsets Reiner.
He knows Porco would have been the right choice, because Porco would never have been scared to the point of hesitating to act in dangerous situations.
More importantly, Porco wouldn't have hesitated to transform, and beat that titan's face in.
Fuck...why did I get chosen instead of him? He asked in his mind pitifully.
Then he remembered what Marcel said before he wasted his precious life to save him.
Reiner...I'm sorry...I'm sorry...you shouldn't have been chosen as the Armored Titan, I just wanted my little brother to live longer than me...than us...I-I wanted him to live a long and peaceful life, not one full of war, suffering and violence...I'm sorry.
Reiner blinked away the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. He looked at the sobbing form of Annie, at Bertholdt's shocked and teary gaze directed at the blonde girl, and steeled himself.
Your death won't have been pointless Marcel. I won't permit it to be.
"We have to push through this." Reiner said with determination.
"We can't stop here. We have to reach the walls and destroy them, just as the Warchief said we should. We'll attract as less titans as possible just like Marcel planned. The eldians inside the walls will have enough time to escape. During the chaos we'll slip among them and search for the Founder." Reiner declared, looking intently at both of them after having stood up.
Annie and Bertholdt looked at him in incredulity for a few moments with only the sound of the wind in their ears.
Tears were still running down Bertholdt's face, and Annie's cheeks were still wet even though she had stopped crying.
"What about Mar...the Jaw Titan?" Asked Bertholdt quietly, looking at Reiner.
"That titan most probably transformed itself back into a human by now." The dark haired boy presumed.
"Yeah...that's true...but it's useless to go after whoever that guy is," Replied his blond friend, "we would just get tired if we searched for him."
It's true, it would be useless to search for that eldian, since it would be difficult to get him to collaborate with us, and since he isn't trained in using Marcel's titan power, he could get us all caught. Bertholdt thought.
Looking directly in Reiner's eyes, his vision blurred by his tears, Bertholdt understood immediately that his best friend didn't want to give up even after Marcel's death.
And Bertholdt realized with shock that he didn't intend to give up either. He just can't let Reiner fight alone.
They were all here, risking their lives, for a cause worth fighting for. They can't give up, no matter the situation they're in, even if everything becomes more and more difficult as time passes by.
I'm supposed to be the strongest but I never acted like it and I never took responsability. Because of that, Marcel's dead. Because of that, Porco will never see his brother again. He thought with regret.
But looking at his two other friends with determination, he promised himself that he won't let them down. He'll make sure they both survive. Even if it will cost him his life.
Bertholdt stood up on wobbly legs.
Annie glanced increduly at him and then at Reiner.
Do they really want to continue the mission? Do they really think that without Marcel we have a chance at completing it? The blonde girl asked mentally.
She was ready to tell them it was all pointless. That everything was pointless and that she only understood that after Marcel's death, when she froze and asked herself.
Was Marcel's death pointless? Were all the times he talked and comforted me, pointless? Were all the times he slapped his brother on the back, called him Pokko and told him not to swear, pointless? Were all the times he helped Reiner train his fighting skills, pointless? Were all the times he ruffled Pieck's hair with affection or cheered Bertholdt to do his very best during training, pointless?
Annie knew the answer to all those questions almost automatically.
The answer was NO.
None of those moments were pointless.
The time she spent with Marcel and the others, was the best time of her 11 years of life. Probably of her whole life, even if she still had 14 years left to live, and she would do anything, to return to that period of her life and live in it, with them, forever.
But the world isn't like that, and the only thing she has now, is the memory.
She never thought that after leaving her house — her father — for the training facility of the Warriors of Marley, she would find what she never had and what she desired the most.
A family, friends who cared about her and who went through the same, if not worse things as her.
A father who made her grow up among punching bags, trained her to become the best killing machine possible, and use her to become a honorary Marleyan, without the tiniest bit of care for the fact that his only daughter, would die 15 years after she became a Warrior.
Only thinking about the fact that he would live a peaceful life if he sacrificed his only daughter.
She didn't regret never returning to her house after she left for the first time.
Even though she and Reiner have never been close. She knows he and Bertholdt are, and that the dark haired boy would follow his friend to the end of the world.
But Bertholdt was too important to her.
He was the boy who was kind to her when she didn't deserve it. He was the boy who never stopped suggesting her to talk to him and his friends. He was the boy that understood that she hated being alone even if she didn't try to be in anyone's company.
I failed in protecting Marcel...but I will not fail to protect Bertholdt. The blonde thought with confidence.
"If we're going to continue the mission, then we're heading to the walls right this moment." She declared with a resolute voice. Without waiting for a reply, she cut herself with her ring and let heat envelope her.
11 hours later
They had been heading north for hours and the walls were nowhere in sight yet.
Bertholdt and Reiner were positioned on Annie's shoulders, or at least the shoulders of her titan form.
Dammit, this is bad. Reiner thought, looking behind him.
Annie had attracted a great amount of titans as she ran north. Everywhere he looked, Reiner saw titans chasing them. There were so many that they sent a giant cloud of dust behind them.
Reiner hoped the eldians inside the walls were ready to evacuate their population in case of great catastrophies because he dared not think about what would happen if the crowd behind them chased normal people.
On his right, Annie's mouth opened and a big cloud of steam got out of it.
She was tired. Reiner knew she was.
The plan was for Marcel to carry them to the walls since he could stay in his titan form for almost an entire day. Now that he was gone, his role fell to Annie as she was the best to fill it in his absence. Unfortunately for them she already passed her maximum limit, and it was only a matter of time before she collapsed in exhaustion.
Shit...are we really gonna die here? Without achieving anything?
Reiner's bad thoughts were interrupted by Bertholdt's cry.
"The Walls!! I see them!!"
Reiner raised his head and looked ahead of him.
The walls were just in their reach. The distance wasn't too great, they could definitely make it.
He shouted for Annie to switch with him, and they continued making their way towards the walls.
He stopped when he arrived in front of what seemed to be a gate, leaving Bertholdt in front of it, and distancing himself from him while keeping Annie safe in his right hand.
After getting to a safe distance, Reiner looked towards the gate as a huge blast of thunder hit his friend.
Bertholdt felt flesh and immense heat envelope his body. The ground shook for a few seconds until he could grip the top of the walls with his hands.
He raised his head and gazed over the wall to see a big city. He watched as people pointed at him in fear. Glancing behind him, he saw the titans that Annie attracted come closer and closer.
The earlier I do it, the bigger the chance for the people of the walls to escape. With this thought, Bertholdt kicked down the gate.
The impact of his kick was disastrous, people were crushed and houses were destroyed by the debris of the gate.
I knew I had to do this. Me, Reiner, Marcel and Annie knew, we had to do this, Porco and Pieck knew this too. The Warchief told us that this was necessary... but I didn't think it would be so horrible to see. Bertholdt thought as he made his enormous body collapse on the ground, starting to burn up the huge amount of flesh that protected his nape's area.
When he got out of his nape — flesh still attaching him to his titan's body — he saw a pure titan who was even more terrifying than the one who ate Marcel.
It had a macabre smile on its face while it walked towards him.
Bertholdt had never been more terrified in his life than in this moment. Frozen in fear, he looked at the titan that was about to grab him until it was suddenly punched in the face by an armored fist.
Reiner opened his right palm and waited for Bertholdt to get on it. His friend quickly scrambled off, his limp titan form evaporating.
After Reiner closed his hand, Bertholdt grasped Annie's unconscious body in his arms as his friend climbed to the top of the wall.
The sight that met Reiner was terrible.
Titans had spilled through the gate, destroying houses and eating people alive.
Bertholdt got off Reiner's right hand while carrying Annie in his arms.
Looking at the devastation going on in the city below him, Reiner tried to stay focused on his priority, bring: himself, Bertholdt and Annie among the people of the walls.
Then he saw it.
It was a second gate that closed off this entire area from what he realized was another line of walls. If he didn't breach it, it would be impossible for them to infiltrate among the population.
Glancing at Bertholdt and Annie, Reiner made a decision. He'll wait for at least an hour before breaching that inner gate, so that the population could have a chance at escaping.
Slowly he laid on top of the wall with his titan form and secured himself so that he wouldn't fall. Then he got out of his armored nape and talked to Bertholdt with a shaky tone.
"Bertholdt, we're gonna wait here for at least an hour before we go. In the meantime take care of Annie, okay?"
"Y-yeah, all right." The taller boy replied, looking in horror at the chaos he was responsible for.
20 hours later
It was midday, — just in time for lunch — when Annie woke up.
Slowly opening her eyelids, she saw Bertholdt sitting to her right, knees pressed against his chest.
"Hey... you finally woke up. It felt like you slept for 4 years." He said, a small smile on his face.
It disappeared so fast that she thought she just imagined it.
Sitting up, she looked in alarm and confusion at all the people around them, minding their own business without so much as a glance at the two of them.
"Where are we? Where's Reiner?" She quickly asked, her mouth dry and her voice hoarse.
"We're in a refugee center, and Reiner went to get rations of food for us while I kept an eye on you." The boy replied somberly, looking at the floor of the building they were in with an empty expression.
It was years since Annie last saw Bertholdt with that expression on his face and she was filled with trepidation by it.
"What happened?" She asked softly, voice still hoarse, trying to meet his jade eyes.
When she didn't get an answer, she gripped the arm that was around his legs. Bertholdt flinched at the contact and met her eyes.
"What happened?" She asked again firmly.
He gazed away.
"What we knew would happen to the people here...once we breached the walls." He whispered sniffling.
"Soldiers, men, women, fathers, mothers, sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, kids... they're all dead because of me. Crushed by the debris of the gate and eaten by the titans that got inside...was there really no other way?" He asked, tears slowly running down his face.
Annie looked at him in sadness. There really was no other way...
"I'm sorry Bertholdt. I really am sorry... but you didn't do it because you wanted to or because you liked it. You did it because we would have all died otherwise. I'm sorry for what you had to do, but we have to go forward. You have to go forward." She whispered in his ear, hugging him deeply.
Bertholdt slowly embraced her, crying on her right shoulder.
"W-why?...All I'm good for...is killing and destroying..." He sobbed silently.
Annie embraced him even tighter, and caressed his hair as a lump formed in her throat at his words.
After several minutes, their comrade returned but neither the blonde girl nor the dark haired boy noticed him.
Their blond companion froze at seeing them in their position. He slowly put down the two trays of food he was carrying.
After a minute of hearing their sobs and murmurs his vision started to blur, and he decided to crawl towards his companions.
He hugged them and finally broke down in tears, telling them that he'll make sure they succeed in their mission.
Whatever the cost.
That same evening Reiner was looking at the ceiling, finding it hard to sleep until he could hear Bertholdt's even breathing to his left.
Comforted by something familiar, he slowly closed his eyes and let his tired body and mind rest.