Clint snuck into her room once he was sure everyone else was asleep. Their late night rendezvous' had become regular, and Pepper knew about it, but no one else, and they wanted to keep it that way for as long as possible.
She was asleep. He could see the soft rise and fall of her chest, and could hear her quiet breath. Going by the sheer black lingerie she was wearing, she had fallen asleep waiting for him. Clint smiled at the sight of her curled up in a ball like that, her face showing more vulnerability in her sleep than he'd ever seen when she was awake. A familiar feeling spread through his chest while he gazed at her. A feeling that he'd never known until he'd met her, but it became a recurring feeling, something that was just there when he gazed at her while she wasn't looking. He knew that if she ever caught him staring at her, she'd probably break his arm or something.
He tip-toed over to her bed, and ran his finger down her jaw, tracing the strong bone there. Her eyes fluttered open, and he inwardly cursed himself for waking her.
"You're here." She whispered, pulling him to lay down beside her, then resting her cheek on his bare chest.
"You thought I'd skipped out on you?" He asked, incredulously.
"No, you'd skip out on this?" She joked, gesturing to her scantily clad body with a small smile on her full pink lips.. "You took your time though."
"I had to wait until everyone was asleep, remember?"
"No point." She said, as she began pressing soft, feather-like kisses up his chest.
Clint raised an eyebrow, which she caught so began to explain.
"Tony was talking to Pepper about finding out who was making me a very satisfied customer, his words not mine, and she let it slip. I think she managed to hit him into keeping quiet tonight, but by tomorrow he'll have told everyone."
Clint rolled his eyes, but all thoughts of making a sarcastic comment were wiped from his mind, as the young woman began her sweet assault on his neck. He almost groaned in pure ecstasy when she nibbled on his ear before pressing kisses along his jaw line, each one feeling like she'd left a trail of fire on his skin.
She was teasing him, and they both knew it. She kissed everywhere on his face; his forehead, eyes, nose, cheeks, jaw and either side of his mouth, but never touched his lips. Clint had all the patience in the world, but not when it came to this, not when it came to her, so he roughly grabbed the back of her head to keep her still and captured her mouth with his, making a moan rise from her throat.
Clint rolled on top of her without separating their kiss, their bodies flush against each other. He broke the kiss much sooner than she had anticipated. Usually he tried to make her completely breathless, so she was excused from looking up at him in confusion.
"Why'd you stop?" She asked.
He looked into her brown eyes, seeing the flame behind them, and grinned.
"I'm not good with all the emotional stuff, but I've got to say this, just so you've heard it once-"
"Clint, you don't have to say anything that you think I want to hear-" She cut him off, and he knew that she thought he felt obligated since they were sleeping together to say those three words.
"I'm not saying it because I think its what you want to hear. I'm saying it because its true and I want to tell you, so you know."
"Clint, sweetheart, I know. Besides, actions speak louder than words."
Clint was relieved that he didn't actually have to say those words. He wasn't sure he was capable. They were both damaged, seen to be beyond repair, but they fixed each other. Together they made one person, at least. She made him feel things that he'd thought didn't exist, and he made her feel things that she thought she'd never feel again. Clint knew it was out of character for him to be thinking like this. Natasha would probably scoff and look at him like he was crazy, and Stark would laugh for hours. But she'd changed him. Not that anyone else would ever see those changes. They were just for her.
Looking down at her, he saw the same spark that was always in her eyes, but he knew the spark meant something different when she was with him. That he was her exception.
"Love is for children, I would know, I was that naive child once, who loved a man so much she died for him twice. Once out of mourning, the second time out of a misguided attempt to play the hero he wanted me to be," She told him, taking another sip of Stark's favourite brand of expensive whisky. Clint saw the despair in her eyes, and anger filled his body. He hated the man who made his partner like this. Something so beautiful shouldn't be broken like this. "I'm not the hero, Clint. I can't be. There's too much red in my ledger. I'm not the good girl that he wanted me to be. That I could have been if he hadn't given up on me the first time."
"You are the hero. You save people with us, with the Avengers."
"That doesn't make up for the things I've done. Maybe it cancels them out, but I can't forget them, Clint. Each one is a nightmare that replays itself over and over again when I close my eyes. That's why I'm never going to fall in love again. I can't let myself become that dependent on another human being again. Love made me lose my focus, and because of that, the people I loved died. My mom, my dad, my best friend and her fiancé and countless others. There's so much blood on my hands that'll never wash away."
He remembered that conversation, word for word, because it haunted him. He'd never seen her so broken, so fragile, so vulnerable before. He had hated seeing her that way. But then the next day when she'd woken up naked in his arms, it was gone, and she was back to her usual happy self, even more so than usual. Clint also remembered how she had not allowed herself to get drunk after that night either.
But that was how their fling had started. She'd confided in him, like she had many times before, but that confession trumped them all. A stronger bond than they had ever had was forged, and the spark that was always lingering between them, one they had both felt on many occasions, exploded into fireworks.
They continued on in secret, hoping for S.H.I.E.L.D missions to take them away to different countries and new hotels for peace and quiet. They weren't in a relationship, they'd never label it that way, but what they had was enough…for now.
Clint knew one day that he'd be able to say those words, and hoped she'd be able to say them back, but until then, he'd just have her in any way he could.
Clint smiled down at her, the slow, lop-sided grin that he knew made her melt on the inside, and lowered his head to possess her mouth once more, before pulling away again.
"You are something else, Suzanne Dawn, you know that?"
"That's why you like me. I'm not like everyone else." She whispered, pulling his mouth back to hers.
Actions definitely spoke louder than words, Clint thought throughout that night, and well into the morning.
Suzanne was right twice that night. As soon as they got up the next morning, and had dressed and ventured out to the Avengers communal living area, Clint still bare-chested but his sweats now on, and Suzanne wearing her underwear and an open silk robe, which everyone but Steve was now used to seeing, Tony began his teasing.
"Hey, well isn't it the love birds?" Tony grinned, happy that he'd managed a play on the word birds, considering both of their codenames were bird-related. "Tell me, Barton, is the Phoenix hot in bed? Oh I've got another one! Suzie Q, exactly how good is Barton's aim? Oh me, me, me! I have another one? When are you going to make an honest woman of her, Barton, you know, settle down, build a nest, hatch a few eggs?"
Suzanne just smirked, and turned to Clint, kissing him quickly and passionately, stunning everyone in the room, including Clint. She smiled at him as she pulled away, and then smirked at Tony.
"I'm not a bird, Snark, so I'm telling you this, there will not be any bird babies around here. Nor is anyone settling down, or building nests. Living in the moment. Right, Clint?"
Still shocked by her obvious public display of affection, Clint just nodded in response. Suzanne grinned.
"Well I'm going to the training room after breakfast. Anyone care to join me?" She asked, grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl on the island in the middle of the open kitchen.
Clint watched how calm she was acting, though she'd just confirmed their relationship to their team mates and friends. Then he shook his head. Though they were practically one person, knowing full well what the other thought, without Suzanne's telepathy, she still managed to surprise him.
"I'll join you, Lady Suzanne. I've been wondering if someone so small would make a difficult match for me in combat." Thor boomed, ignoring everyone's still shocked faces. Well everyone, but Natasha. When it came to Clint and Suzanne, she'd always suspected there was something there.
"Suzie Q, do you really need another workout? Or didn't Legolas manage to tire you out?" Tony asked, earning himself a smack on the head from the closest two females to him; Pepper and Darcy.
"I'm sure Clint exhausted her. I mean, look at him. The dude's ripped." Darcy said, making the archer blush slightly, which fortunately for him no one saw. He would never have heard the end of it.
"Doesn't mean he's any good in bed. Muscles don't equal stamina." Tony retorted.
"You'd know, wouldn't you Snark?" Suzanne replied, grinning at him and his shocked face. He gaped at her, then pointed at Clint angrily, his mouth opening and closing several times before he managed to spit his words out.
"You've turned my Suzie Q against me! You've given her sex and now she's gone crazy!"
"Maybe that's testimony to Clint's mad bedroom skills. She's had so much sex that she's literally lost the plot." Darcy said, barely holding in her laughter at Tony's look of pure outrage.
Suzanne looked around at the situation unfolding, and smiled, clearly amused.
"Actually, Thor, can we rain check on the sparring till the afternoon. I think I might go have a bath first. My body is so sore right now." Suzanne said smirking, making the apple float back into the bowl, and walking away back towards the bedrooms. Clint stared at her as she walked away, like she knew he would, and he was too busy staring at her butt to notice that everyone was staring at him, until Natasha cleared her throat, bringing Clint back to reality.
He turned his head to see everyone looking at him expectantly.
Clint said nothing, just shook his head, and followed Suzanne down the hallway, picking her up once he'd caught up to her and throwing her over his shoulder, smiling at her laughter and her weak demands to be put down.
They wouldn't have moments like this all the time, so might as well make the most of whatever it is they are while they could.