So, here's my first posting of the new year! Yay! It's, as the description says, a small collection of one-shots set to Frank Sinatra songs :) It's for my best friend and favorite fish, Turtle! :D

So I was going to have a long sweet message here (as you know, fish) buuuut I have an idea for that so instead I'm just going to say this...

Turtle, you are my best friend and honestly, I don't know what I did to deserve a friend like you. I hope that this new year treats you well, and good luck this semester at college. I know you'll do great :) I love you, and I hope that you enjoy your (very late) Christmas gift!

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, or Body and Soul by Frank Sinatra!

I'm All For You (Body and Soul)

This wasn't how it was supposed to happen, he was sure. Surely destiny couldn't be this cruel? Why would it want him to be alone for the rest of his life? Gently spreading out Arthur's bedding, Merlin sighed. Today was a day he wasn't sure he could survive; after months of planning and weeks of preparation, the day of the royal wedding had finally happened.

It was a hectic day, but one filled with such excitement. No matter how much he wanted his friends to be happy, he couldn't help how his heart was slowly breaking. As hard as he had tried to fight it, he wasn't able to stop himself from falling in love with the Prat he was destined to protect. He forever seemed to fall for those he could not have. First Freya, beautiful Freya, and now Arthur, the King of Camelot, someone so wonderful and out of his reach.

With shaky hands Merlin smoothed out the last imperfection, trying his hardest not to think of what was going to happen there, later that night. If not for the fact that Arthur didn't know about his feelings, Merlin would accuse the man of purposefully trying to hurt him. Why else would he require Merlin to do all these last minute preparations for his wedding night with Gwen?

He shook his head at the stupidity of his thoughts, turning on his heel to walk out of the room. The reason why he was in charge of that was because of his position as Arthur's manservant and the fact that despite their stations they were best friends. Ironically, the young warlock was the person that the King trusted most. Merlin was never sure how to feel about that. Scrubbing a hand over his face he fought back his emotions, focusing instead on what tasks he was likely to be set once he reached the kitchen. Damn, but he couldn't wait until this was over.

I can't be here anymore.

The moment the thought entered the young man's head, he was setting his wine goblet down, putting his years' worth of sneaking around skills to use to leave the room full of merry makers unnoticed. Once he was halls away from the room, the sounds of celebrations dimming, he ran. Without a care to how it must look, without a thought, he ran, losing himself to the motion, and the way the cool air stung his face, slowly seeping into his clothes.

Before long he found himself at the east tower, slowing in speed until he was standing at the edge, panting as he leaned against the stone wall. This was going to be harder than he thought. Could he really stand to see them dote on each other, all day and night? He didn't know if his heart could take it. So caught up in his anguish he didn't notice that someone had found him until a heavy hand landed on his shoulder, drawing him out of his head with a jolt.

Jumping at the touch he spun around, his already pounding heart beating faster when he was who it was.

"Arthur! Why are you out here? Where's Gwen?" he questioned, glancing behind him to see if he could spot the new Queen. Seeing no one he turned back to face him, a brow raised in query.

"She's inside. What are you doing out here, Merlin?" he asked, his voice softer than Merlin had ever heard it before.

"Just…getting some fresh air, is all." He turned back to the wall, arms resting on top as he gazed at the forest, the trees closer here than anywhere else in the castle. Beside him he felt Arthur copy his stance; glancing from the corner of his eye he found startling blue eyes already looking at him. Blushing from the intensity he found in that gaze, he dropped his eyes to his arms, noting almost distantly how his fingers were curling into a tight fist.

"What are you doing out here, Arthur? Shouldn't you be celebrating with your new wife and the rest of the kingdom?" he tried to keep the emotion out of his voice, but knew he failed from the way his King's brow furrowed ever so slightly.

"It's not much a celebration without you there." Shocked, Merlin's head whipped around, eyes widened in his surprise. "What's the matter, Merlin?"

Mouth opening in an instant negative, the young warlock found himself pausing; Arthur was being uncharacteristically open, shouldn't he do the same? "I'm fine, Arthur. It's nothing I can't handle." He said softly, a small, ad smile gracing his lips briefly.

"You know…you know you can tell me anything, right?"

Those words combined with the vulnerable, open expression on his handsome face were like a stab to the heart, even while he found himself warmed by the sincerity he saw.

"I do, sire. Just as you can trust me." Seeing how his words relaxed him, probably setting to ease an unrest he hadn't been aware of, Merlin decided to toss caution to the wind and give himself tonight to do something he knew he never would dare to do again.

Taking a deep breath as he gathered his courage, Merlin turned, placing one hand on Arthur's shoulder, the other resting tentatively on his cheek. Ignoring the curiosity that he could feel in the blonde's gaze he leaned in pressing his lips gently to the corner of his mouth. Eyes closed for those few precious moments, Merlin took everything in that he could; the heat he could feel even through his clothes, the slight scrap of stubble beneath his palm and the softness of his skin. He committed it all to memory, knowing that he would relive this moment time and again.

Pulling back enough just to press his cheek to his, Merlin could not stop the soft, sad sigh. "Goodnight, Arthur." He let his full affection be heard, knowing it startled him by the soft gasp Arthur gave. "And congratulations, sire." He took a small moment more to soak it all in then stepped away, hands slowly falling away as he placed space between them. Then, without looking over at his King to see his reaction, he walked away, waiting until he was halfway back to his quarters to let his tears fall.

No matter what happened, loving Arthur was something he would never regret.

Soo this was unintentionally angsty. Whoops. I'll hopefully be starting the next one-shot tonight, which looks like it might be a bit smutty. Just, what even.

aha anyways, thank you for reading and I hope that you liked it!

Let me know what you think? :)

Ohh, and, PS, there's a link to my tumblr in my bio! And also, there's a poll up as well! I'd appreciate if you would go vote~