It's difficult to pull apart. They're a part of something, an image.
Hikaru and Kaoru.
Honey and Mori.
Slave and Master, but Kaoru swears he isn't that bitter about the way things are. He swears that he loves his brother, because he does but he hates the way Hikaru's eyes wander to Haruhi and then back like he's reluctant. Kaoru hates helping him just so Hikaru can falter on the uptake. Just so Hikaru can put a hand on his hip while he's trying to sleep. He hates the way Hikaru won't notice how his eyes wander to Mori and then back like he's so very reluctant.
Kaoru doesn't often wonder what Mori thinks, but he wonders if everyone knows. That they aren't playing. He wonders if Mori regrets this and he wonders if maybe he should just stop reaching for something he can't have because there's no way to break the symmetry. He won't ever not be Hikaru's brother and Takashi won't ever not be Mitsukuni's cousin.
He's never been ashamed of himself like this before. He's always been the one with control over his emotions, he doesn't do things he would regret. He can't rightfully regret it either because he still loves his brother.
They've been in this place so long, where the only words were us and them. Accusatory and divided right down the center: us and them.
Hikaru doesn't want it anymore and neither does Kaoru. They want friends, they want to laugh and play with everyone else and things are changing. They can't be us and them anymore. There has to be you and me and him and her and sometimes, if Hikaru is in the right mind, there can be we.
Kaoru isn't content to only have that special state of mind in the bedroom. He wants to feel like he's part of a new symmetry all the time and he looks up at Mori and Mori always knows when he's upset because those are the days when Kyouya calls them in and charges them just to keep their secret, just to arrange this way for them to be together and alone.
"Do you think…"
Mori watches him intently whenever he speaks, but right now Kaoru can't get the words out. His head droops down between his shoulders tiredly.
"Kaoru." Takashi says it with a strange kind of affection and it makes the half-felt twin look up. It makes him feel ashamed and he crawls forward over the couch until he's in Mori's arms.
"I'm sorry."
"Mm." He conveys boundless sympathy in one syllable and the caring underlain there shoots straight through Kaoru's heart.
Standard Disclaimers.