as introduced by lexxie_lizzie...
Disclaimerer: I do not own lotr (book or movie), nor do I own any of the non-lotr characters (excluding Caitrin) – they are real people…in essence…
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The sun was gently dawning over Hobbiton. All was calm, with occasional sparrow flitting from tree to tree. In fact, all was calmly calm, even calmly calmfully calm, not to mention tranquil. Really, I s'pose it was tranquilly calm and calmfully tranquil, especially in the kitchen of Bag End. Frodo had just woken & was getting himself a pre-Breakfast snack of a Danish from the pantry, when he heard a sudden, terrific *bangcrashsmackthud* coming from the living room. Followed by a single voice *dingalingaling!!*
Frodo fearfully entered the room. However, what he saw surprised him even more than he had expecting to be surprised (which is not surprising really).
What he did see was 5 teenaged girls. The first was blonde, leggy and busty – she dusted herself off and flashed a brilliant display of straight white teeth, skipped over to him, and exclaimed "Hi-my-name-is-Pixxie!!" She flipped her hair, Pantene style, over her shoulder, and sat perched herself on the closest chair, which was considerably smaller than she was.
The next was olive skinned and violet haired; apart from colouring, she looked and acted, much like an elf. She prowled, cat-like, over to the fire and gracefully plonked herself in front of it (something not many can do!!). The blonde one, Pixxie, giggled. "That's Arkazel!"
"What about me?!?!?!" half screamed, half sung (Shannon Noll style, but considerably better – anyone can sing better than Shannon) a girl similar in height to Pixxie. She had Big, dark green eyes…and shoulder length green hair…AND SHE GLOWED LIME GREEN!! In fact, she didn't just glow…she EMANATED greenness. She curled into a little ball, looked up at him, poked her tongue out and said, "I'm Rhyski…"
A short girl with waist length dark red hair, and emitting azure and orange sparkles, starting singing. It was the kind of randomly cheerful, bouncy music you hear in movies when everybody's happy. He kinda just knew her name was Caitrin; maybe she had introduced herself in the song? She then got up and began to dance about the room, and it fitted her song. He felt like joining in, and all of a sudden everybody in the room got up and did the heel and toe tango.
Once they had all collapsed in an exhausted heap on the ground (with Caitrin still singing), an even shorter girl exclaimed "Let's do that again!!" She had very short hair, which was in two ponytails, and somehow looked like two pompoms had magically attached themselves to the sides of her head. She was dressed from head to toe in scarlet, including a magnificent long, very full skirt covered in embroidery. Over one arm she was carrying an absolutely enormous bag, overflowing with lace and satin, velvet and netting; under the other, a large black book. She rolled over to Frodo (who had shuffled away once he had regained control of himself) and put out her hand. "I'm Lexxie!!" she said with a grin somehow cute-little-girlish, and rather evil. Suddenly, she withdrew her hand and plunged it into the bag, pulling out a flouncy powder blue dress, covered in layer upon layer of lace. "It will bring out the colour of your eyes, I think…it cost me three dollars at the Red Cross Shop!!"
Frodo backed away, if not frightened then at least very disturbed. Who are these girls? WHAT are they?! And what in Middle Earth are they doing in the MIDDLE OF MY LIVING ROOM?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! He glanced up at the hole they came through, hoping there was someway they might fly back out of it…only that the hole had disappeared. So I'm stuck with them? Is that it?! Nooooooooooooooooooo!!
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Please review!! It's my first fic, so any advice is appreciated.
And please limit it to CONSTRUCTIVE criticism…
Disclaimerer: I do not own lotr (book or movie), nor do I own any of the non-lotr characters (excluding Caitrin) – they are real people…in essence…
*************************************************************************
The sun was gently dawning over Hobbiton. All was calm, with occasional sparrow flitting from tree to tree. In fact, all was calmly calm, even calmly calmfully calm, not to mention tranquil. Really, I s'pose it was tranquilly calm and calmfully tranquil, especially in the kitchen of Bag End. Frodo had just woken & was getting himself a pre-Breakfast snack of a Danish from the pantry, when he heard a sudden, terrific *bangcrashsmackthud* coming from the living room. Followed by a single voice *dingalingaling!!*
Frodo fearfully entered the room. However, what he saw surprised him even more than he had expecting to be surprised (which is not surprising really).
What he did see was 5 teenaged girls. The first was blonde, leggy and busty – she dusted herself off and flashed a brilliant display of straight white teeth, skipped over to him, and exclaimed "Hi-my-name-is-Pixxie!!" She flipped her hair, Pantene style, over her shoulder, and sat perched herself on the closest chair, which was considerably smaller than she was.
The next was olive skinned and violet haired; apart from colouring, she looked and acted, much like an elf. She prowled, cat-like, over to the fire and gracefully plonked herself in front of it (something not many can do!!). The blonde one, Pixxie, giggled. "That's Arkazel!"
"What about me?!?!?!" half screamed, half sung (Shannon Noll style, but considerably better – anyone can sing better than Shannon) a girl similar in height to Pixxie. She had Big, dark green eyes…and shoulder length green hair…AND SHE GLOWED LIME GREEN!! In fact, she didn't just glow…she EMANATED greenness. She curled into a little ball, looked up at him, poked her tongue out and said, "I'm Rhyski…"
A short girl with waist length dark red hair, and emitting azure and orange sparkles, starting singing. It was the kind of randomly cheerful, bouncy music you hear in movies when everybody's happy. He kinda just knew her name was Caitrin; maybe she had introduced herself in the song? She then got up and began to dance about the room, and it fitted her song. He felt like joining in, and all of a sudden everybody in the room got up and did the heel and toe tango.
Once they had all collapsed in an exhausted heap on the ground (with Caitrin still singing), an even shorter girl exclaimed "Let's do that again!!" She had very short hair, which was in two ponytails, and somehow looked like two pompoms had magically attached themselves to the sides of her head. She was dressed from head to toe in scarlet, including a magnificent long, very full skirt covered in embroidery. Over one arm she was carrying an absolutely enormous bag, overflowing with lace and satin, velvet and netting; under the other, a large black book. She rolled over to Frodo (who had shuffled away once he had regained control of himself) and put out her hand. "I'm Lexxie!!" she said with a grin somehow cute-little-girlish, and rather evil. Suddenly, she withdrew her hand and plunged it into the bag, pulling out a flouncy powder blue dress, covered in layer upon layer of lace. "It will bring out the colour of your eyes, I think…it cost me three dollars at the Red Cross Shop!!"
Frodo backed away, if not frightened then at least very disturbed. Who are these girls? WHAT are they?! And what in Middle Earth are they doing in the MIDDLE OF MY LIVING ROOM?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! He glanced up at the hole they came through, hoping there was someway they might fly back out of it…only that the hole had disappeared. So I'm stuck with them? Is that it?! Nooooooooooooooooooo!!
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Please review!! It's my first fic, so any advice is appreciated.
And please limit it to CONSTRUCTIVE criticism…