If only Lily knew
Chapter one: If only Lily knew about the scars
For all Lily Evans claimed to know James Potter's 'type', Sirius doubted she would ever truly understand him. She would never understand why he insisted on sitting beside his best friend in every single class, or watching over him until he fell asleep. She would never understand why he refused to leave his friend's side, or allow him out of his sight. If only she knew the truth. If only she understood.
Maybe then she would give him the chance he deserved.
James Potter sat on the edge of his best friend's bed, brushing his fingers lightly across the sleeping boys head. He could feel his heart beating out of chest, his hands balling themselves into fists at the unfairness of it all. Through foggy glasses, he allowed his eyes to skim the Black heir's frame, making every attempt to ignore the outside world. None of it mattered after all, not after what he had almost witnessed. For all he had tried to forget the happenings of that night, James found himself unable to escape the harsh realities of the situation. Sirius Black- his best friend - his brother – his everything- had tried to take his own life. Neck deep in a bath of warm water, James had found him bleeding out, wrists slit and face paled. James had found him completely limp... and he had assumed the worst.
The boy had rushed to his side then, carried him to the hospital wing. He had sat as his bedside and held his hand until he awoke. He had blinked back his tears in order to comfort Sirius' own, sat beside him as he was lectured by McGonagall- Dumbledore- Madame Poomfry. James watched as he was lectured by everybody but his own parents. And it cut him up inside.
James didn't understand how somebody who meant absolutely EVERYTHING to him, could mean so little to his own family. It simply didn't fly with him. It would never fly with him. He didn't understand how his own parents could be more concerned about Sirius' health than Mr and Mrs Black, than Regulus or Bellatrix or Narcissa. He just didn't understand- and he wasn't entirely sure he wanted to.
Holding Sirius in his arms, James couldn't bring himself to care enough anyhow. In that moment, nothing else seemed to matter. He cared not of impressing Lily Evans or tormenting Snivellus. The world could end for all he cared... so long as Sirius was okay, nothing else mattered.
Hesitantly, the boy moved to run his fingers' across Sirius' scars, glasses being discarded in light of wiping his tears. While his best friend slept, James cried.
He cried for everything he almost lost.
"What has you so sour Potter, lose another quidditch match?"
At Lily's words, James could not help but scowl, shaking his head slowly as she moved to sit beside him. "Don't make assumptions" he replied, fiddling uneasily with the cuff of his shirt. Sirius was late home from his detention after all; it was not as if he had time to argue with Evans.
Clambering out of his seat, James attempted to ignore the sour looks he was receiving from the redhead beside him. "Where are you going James?" she called, obviously a little taken aback by his actions. James Potter usually hung off her every word after all; it was not often she found herself without the boy's attention.
"Upstairs" He responded snappily, pushing his way through the common room. He couldn't afford to relax when Sirius was out anymore... not after what had happened. James Potter just needed to see his name on the map, watch his footsteps until their names were side by side- like they were supposed to be.
For all Lily Evans claimed to know James Potter's type, she really didn't know him at all