Chapter Text

It was a sunday night. Bars and night clubs usually crowded at days like this. Why wouldn't they? The night sky meshes perfectly with the atmosphese of LA. Especially on sunday nights. Workers are celebrating their day offs by either getting high or drunk.

Kermit was not usually a big fan of drinking but right now, he just wants to get drunk really fast. His head is starting to get a little dizzy. That's good. Though, he isn't sure if that's because of the alcohol or just because there are so many people dancing and shouting all around him. He hadn't expected the bar to be this crowded. But then again, he has only been in a bar 2 or maybe 3 times? So who is he to judge?

He asked the bartender to get him another shot of alcohol. Hoping to get drunk as fast as he can.

Miss Piggy left their house today. It's cause of the same thing that happened a month ago. Only this time, she acctually left for real.

Miss Piggy is uh... a really greedy pig so to speak. She would always be jealous whenever Kermit was talking to other women.

Although this time, her reason for being mad at Kermit was not because of a woman.

It was because of a man.

This morning, Kermit and Miss Piggy were off buying cookies. They talked a bit with the cookie seller (named "Cookie Monster" if that alone isn't weird enough).

"Uh. We'll take a jar of chocholate chip cookies please." Kermit said. "No baby! Two jars of chocholate chip cookies! Even better than one!" Piggy snorted. She was always like this. Wanting everything to be more than necessary. What a pig.

"Okie. Wait. Let me just get those cOoKiES for you."

Turning around, cookie monster stepped on a small ladder to reach two jar of chocholate chips on top of a shelf.

Kermit can't help but to stare at the guy's ass. He knew this was wrong. His fucking wife was beside him. But there was something about the monster's blue furry ass that made heat pile up in Kermit's smotach.

"Uhh... Kermy..." Oh shit.

Piggy caught him staring.

Cookie monster retrive back to the front desk carrying two cookie jars full of delicious chocholate chips.

"Ok. That will be 15 do-"

"FORGET THIS. TAKE YOUR STUPID COOKIE WITH YOU! KERMY WE'RE GOING HOME!" She turned to face Kermit. Her gaze sharp. You can clearly tell how angry she is just by looking at her eyes. "WE NEED TO TALK"

And with that they storm off the cookie shop.

Taking another shot of alcohol, already feeling really dizzy, Kermit sighed. Truth be told, he never really give a single fuck about Miss Piggy. Never found her attractive, not intrested in her in the slighthest. He also felt disgusted at her at certain times.

He snaped out of his thoughts as a furry hand rubs his tigh.

"Hey there mister" He winked. "Wanna have some fun?" Eyes half lidded, voice seductive.

The guy is really hot. Kermit thought. He looks kinda like that cookie monster guy except with red furr instead of blue. His eyes are also wider and it gave him a slight look of innoccence. His nose is shaped like a really sexy looking egg plant. His figure is slim and petit (kill me).

"I'm Elmo. But you can call me Elm-hoe. I'll be your hoe... mister." He crawled on top of Kermit's lap. Nibbling his ears.

Elmo huh? Intresting name.