I am lonely. It hurts to think about how lonely I am. This pain I feel is like no other, and to think it is all caused by you.
Everyday I wake up but for what? I thought to myself, "for what purpose does my life serve?" I felt as if you would rather have me dead but I keep on living instead because I know if I were to stop, you would only thrive. I have nothing and no one to live for, but yet I still push through. Put to no prevail as the demons of my past drag me back to what I once was,
making me fully aware of my sins.
My life as a whole is falling apart before my very eyes, and I cannot do anything to stop it. Having to watch my parents get killed in front of me, was the most disturbing but yet satisfying thing to happen to me. I felt a certain joy nothing else has brought to me since my little brothers funeral. He was only 3 but I felt it was his time anyways. Based on my situation I had felt at ease when people around me were in pain. As to end their worthless lives was a step up for me. Those individuals who once laughed at me are now under my foot, waiting to be crushed, but yet I don't. I love to watch those before me suffer but yet when faced with such a devious task,I cower like a little dog. Once I had regained my mind, I had looked down beneath me to see Mom and Dad both dead. I screamed in agony " What...WHAT HAPPENED!?" I was run out of my house not knowing where to go or what to do. The only thing I wanted to know was who killed them. I called the police immediately after running off. They quickly responded and soon were at my doorstep. The fact that I do not remember what had happened, but yet I was there when they died. I had talked to them only a few hours prior to me blacking out. I would remember the time between that and now if I could. The fact is I couldn't remember anything since yesterday.